


If Not You

by elaiel



Category: Stargate Universe
Genre: Affection, Angst, Arguing, Cuddling & Snuggling, Developing Relationship, Emotional Baggage, Emotionally Repressed, Engineering, Fake Science, First Kiss, First Time, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Secret Relationship, Slow Build
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-09-02
Updated: 2017-08-01
Packaged: 2017-11-13 10:17:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 41
Words: 151,635
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/502454
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elaiel/pseuds/elaiel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A slow building fic in which Rush and Young discover they have a common ground when it comes to shared misery. In the course of working together to fix Destiny, they find that they may be fixing more than just the ship.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. It's cold

Young was tired and cold and he couldn't remember why coming to this planet was a good idea, except Destiny had come out of FTL next to it, and Lieutenant Scott was sick. Sick enough to be in the infirmary under TJ's care, too sick to fly the shuttle. So he was here, the only other qualified shuttle pilot, and he had left Camile in charge, supported by TJ.

Damn planet with no stargate, what was the use of seed ships if they weren't putting stargates in the right places? Except he knew that wasn't true and this planet had had a perfectly good stargate before the volcano had rolled over it. And it was the volcano that was the cause of all this vegetation that his scientists were so pleased with, at least three more edible plants and two of them actually didn't taste like crap.

He rolled over and tried to get warm in the blankets, but the ground under him was chilly and he was sure the damp was seeping through the fabric of his blankets and into his bones. The pebbles in the sand under him certainly weren't doing him any good as he wriggled trying to find a more comfortable position. The cave on the edge of the sea may have kept off the rain and wind, but the ground was damned uncomfortable.

Silhouetted in the cave entrance, a few yards away was Greer, his gun across his lap, staring out into the starry night. Next to Young on one side was Volker, between him and Greer and snoring thunderously and so fast asleep a grenade could have gone off. On the other side was Rush, silent and still. He could just hear the breathing of the others, soft in sleep, beyond Rush.

Young longed for a real sleeping bag, but Icarus base had never been set up with the intention of any quantity of off planet missions, and tents and the like were not included in what they had brought here with them. Maybe that's what he would suggest next to the mixed group of crew who met in the mess once a week to plan out craft projects. They certainly had made a good enough job of knitting socks, once the two who could had taught the rest. He wiggled his toes in the mystery-mammal-wool socks and realised that his feet were one of the few parts of him not freezing, even though he was fully dressed. Woollen sweaters, he dreamt of a nice woollen sweater or cardigan even, something fuzzy and warm. With a sigh he rolled over and tried to wrap himself tighter in the blanket. Anything warm.

"Will you please shut up." Rush whispered.

"I didn't realise you were awake." He whispered back.

"Point of fact I wasn't until you started shifting around every five seconds."

The man's voice was sleepy and irritable, his accent coming through stronger in his drowsy state.

"Sorry." He apologised. Though he didn't want to apologise, he had woken the man up, which counted for something and then he shifted again.

"What's actually wrong?" Rush asked.

"Cold, it's making my joints ache."

"You're too young to have bad joints."

Rush rolled over finally, facing away from him and Young thought it was really too much to expect any sympathy from the asshole. Why should the man break the habit of a lifetime? He shifted one more time and tried to find a position comfortable enough he could tune out the discomfort and finally go to sleep. It' wasn't easy, his lower back ached and his right knee and he knew exactly which former injuries those stemmed from, one on Earth, one off world. He shifted again, flexing his stiff knee and Rush rolled back over to him.

"For Christ's sake Young it can't be that bad."

"Got my knee broken eight years ago." He said, feeling the need to explain why he was this uncontrolled and restless. "It doesn't like the cold."

"Fine." Said Rush in an undertone. "Am I ever going to get any sleep? If you warm up will you stop wriggling about?"

He was surprised as Rush rolled closer then reached out and untucked Young's blanket, yanking the side that was tucked under him closer to the other man, so they were side by side, and folding the top of his own blanket over both of them, and Young's blanket on top of that so there were two layers.

"Pull this under you." Rush ordered in a harsh whisper, and Young did as he was told, more out of shock than anything else.

They ended up tucked in, two layers of blanket underneath them, two above them, and Young could already feel the other man's body heat radiating towards him.

"Bloody freezing on this planet." Rush whispered. "You'd better not kick in your sleep Young."

Rush settled sleepily back, rolling so his back was up against Young, and Young brought his arms up to his chest and turned his face into the warmth emanating from the other man.

"Go to sleep." Said Rush sourly.

And as he finally began to warm up, Young did.


	2. Plausible deniability

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Who would believe him anyway?

Young woke with a start that made all his muscles twitch. There was an answering sleepy groan from behind him that automatically caused him to tense. It came again, an unexpected and unfamiliar tenor note.

There was an arm round him, close around his waist and pressed firmly against his stomach and he could feel someone's breath warming the back of his neck. The cocoon of blankets around them was snug and warm and pulled up around his chin.

And with that thought, memory came back in a flurry of thoughts, the cave, the discomfort of his aching leg and back, cold floor, Rush bitching at him in the middle of the night about his tossing and turning and finally wrapping them both in the blankets and deliberately turning his back on Young.

That obviously hadn't lasted, and evidently Young himself didn't kick or wriggle in his sleep enough to disturb the other man. Lucky really as this would be really awkward if Rush was awake. Young forced his muscles to relax, one by one from his wool sock clad feet upward.

Truthfully he hadn't been this warm in some time. Destiny wasn't usually cold, but the ship was a wreck frankly and his quarters had a distressing tendency of randomly losing heat. He'd lost count of the times the chill had woken him in the night. He'd even acquired extra bedding to mitigate the effects. He supposed he really ought to just change his quarters like everyone else who'd had issues with where they'd originally settled, but he liked the space he had, and particularly his desk. He didn't want to change, he just wanted it to be warmer.

The cave was still dark and cold and he could hear rain outside as well as the sound of the surf. He only realised what had woken him when Vanessa James started to talk to Greer. Must be a watch changeover.

"Now that's something I never thought I'd see." She said in a quiet voice, laden with amusement.

Young heard Greer chuckle.

"The Colonel's got some old injuries he don't let on about. Was having some difficulties," Greer stressed the word, "with the cold. You shoulda heard Rush bitching at him for keeping him awake."

Damn, he thought they'd been quiet.

"Trust me," continued Greer, "it's self interest on both sides."

They both laughed quietly.

"Still," James added, "you have to admit they look quite cute like that."

Cute? Thought Young. There's something deeply wrong about that statement, and there would be repercussions if this was ever brought up later. There was a short silence before Greer spoke.

"Personally I'd have called it accidental nightmare fuel, Lieutenant."

It was James' turn to chuckle.

"Maybe it's a girl thing?"

"You're a girl Lieutenant?"

Greer's response made them both laugh again.

"Well, you've got your turn to chance it with the nightmares."

"Wake them first of all." Greer told her.

"Of course. Accidentally." She replied.

"Night James."

"Night."

He heard Greer make his quiet way to the back of the cave and settle. James settled into her guard post at the front of the cave. Young began to relax again. Rush lay still behind him, breathing softly. Young could feel the slight press of the man's chest against his back, the slight shift of his arm as he breathed, slow and steady.

It had been a long time since Young had shared a bed or blankets with anyone. Emily, TJ on Icarus, various members of his old team on various planets due to weather, lack of space or facilities. All some significant time ago.

He and TJ had come close, had spent the last year or more orbiting each other, neither of them quite brave enough to make that step over the invisible wall of pain and misunderstanding they had managed to build between them. Young resolved to talk to her when he got back to the ship. Just a chat, open the channels of communication, whatever happened would happen, but at least they'd be talking on a personal rather than professional basis again.

Rush snuffled briefly into his neck and murmured, deep in a dream. The man's arm tightened briefly round Young and his legs shifted. Young found himself settling back more securely against the other man's body. His muscles tensed involuntarily, but as the hand on his stomach flexed gently, and a knee came up to rest against his ass and legs he found himself relaxing back into the embrace. Rush made a low sound, almost, but not quite, a snore and buried his face in the back of Young's shoulder.

It had been an even longer time since anyone had just held him, not violently, not sexually, not needing anything, with no ulterior motive. The ironic thought that after all their disagreements, violence, mutual hatred, trying to kill each other, it was Rush inadvertently providing this comfort was not lost on him. He wondered how Rush would react when he woke. Almost certainly not well. Still it was Rush's fault not his. He wasn't the one on the outside.

Fuck Rush. It was warm, he was comfortable and he had plausible deniability. Young gave up on thinking, relaxed and left himself drift, he'd worry about tomorrow, tomorrow.


	3. Octopus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You're a fucking octopus, all hands and limbs, and you twitch and talk in your sleep."

Rush woke with the dawn. He could hear the sea shore creatures they had seen yesterday beginning to make the odd yammering noise they had made as the sun had gone down yesterday. He was warm and comfortable and relaxed in a kind of lazy way he hadn't been for a long time. Half asleep still, he was only vaguely registering the source of the warmth. He opened his eyes fully to see a curling shock of dark hair liberally sprinkled with grey directly in front of his nose.

Damn.

The man in his arms was breathing deeply and gently in sleep, body tucked up against Rush's chest, arm wrapped over Rush's arm which encircled him. Rush's other arm was pillowed under his own head, but Young had scooted down the bedding a little and his head was tucked into Rush's neck, almost completely under the covers and their legs were tangled.

The covers were tucked up tightly around them still, but when he lifted his head cautiously to look over Young's head towards the front of the cave he could see the back of Lieutenant Vanessa James, gun in hand, staring out into the faint gathering dawn. Which meant the shift had changed. Which meant someone had walked past them. Which meant that no doubt someone had seen him curled up in a blanket with Young.

Shit.

He tensed uncomfortably. He should never have offered this last night. This was a really stupid idea. He would have been better off just giving up on sleep entirely for the night. Young shifted in his arms, making a grumbling noise and tucking his head further into Rush's chest, arm flexing around Rush. He felt movement by his neck and realised Young's fingers were tangled in his hair by his collar.

Oh great.

There was going to be no way of getting out of this one without major embarrassment. There was something slightly childlike in Young's position, hiding himself under the covers, folded into Rush's chest and embrace. Rush could just see how Young was going to react to that one. He knew how he was reacting to that one himself.

Young moved slightly and muttered unhappily, Rush's arm tightened around him reflexively and he looked down, almost expecting to see Young looking at him, but he was talking in his sleep. Apparently the man was dreaming, though whatever it was it wasn't an entirely pleasant dream, as he seemed to be pleading with someone. It was hard to make out the words Young was mumbling into Rush's chest, but the pained tone was unmistakeable. Rush sighed and as he relaxed, the other man burrowed into his chest with a wounded noise.

This was just great. Young's legs flexed and Rush tried to extricate himself as the man shifted, but failed signally. The man twitched and muttered, begging someone in his dream again and Rush caught a word here and there, _No, Please, Help, Don't._ Pretty typical nightmare fodder. He felt the man twitch as if he was struggling in his sleep, his mumbles becoming louder.

Fuck.

If Young woke everyone else…Rush grimaced as Young's voice became clearer for a moment. _Don't go!_ Rush's arm tensed around the man feeling fingers twisting in his hair, pressing into his neck. Tentatively he rubbed his hand up the man's back. Come on Young, shut up and stop dreaming. Fingers tensed in his shirt, mumbling and pleading. Rush rubbed up and down Young's back another couple of times. Young twitched, still mumbling, face pressed into Rush's collar.

Why the hell had Rush given into his own discomfort at the freezing cold and damp on this appalling planet and offered to get into bed with Young. It had been guaranteed to end up in a bad way. And it had.

He rubbed slow firm circles on the other man's back. It seemed to be working, Young had stopped talking in his sleep and seemed to be settling. Now all he had to do was find some way of extricating himself from the clinging octopus that was Colonel Everett Young.

At the front of the cave, Lieutenant James stood and turned to face the cave.

Fucking stupid fucking cold fucking embarrassing planet.

She looked over and, to his chagrin met his eyes. She shook her head ruefully, then put her finger to her lips, pointing down at the bundle of Colonel in the blankets in front of him and miming shaking him awake. Rush frowned. Vanessa turned her back deliberately.

He slid the arm from under his head, and tensing the arm round Young, slid the hand down carefully between them to cover Young's mouth. Still holding Young into his chest, he shook Young by the shoulder with the arm wrapped round his back.

Young tensed, and tried to speak through the hand over his mouth. Rush used the hand over Young's mouth to tilt his face back and their eyes met. Rush saw Young's dawning realisation of where he was. He took his hand away from Young's mouth.

"You're a fucking octopus in your sleep." He hissed at Young.

Their faces were inches apart.

"Me?" Young whispered in irritation. "You're the one with your arm round me."

Rush chose not to respond to that, the reverse was also true anyway.

"Lieutenant James wants us to wake up. I'm assuming she's trying to protect your reputation." Rush whispered back sourly. "We need to get out of here quietly and without waking anyone. Volker is about six inches behind you."

He straightened his legs, sliding his knee from between Young's thighs and they rolled apart but Rush kept hold of Young. Young gave him a funny look.

"If I let you go you'll land on Volker." Rush hissed. "The man sleeps like the dead, but not that much."

They both scooted away from Volker and slid arms out from the blankets. It was freezing out there and Rush shivered reflexively, his body shuddering momentarily against Young's. Young looked at him and grinned.

"Not so bad in here then." He muttered.

"The company could be better." Rush scowled.

"Face it; you'd never have slept in that cold."

"Would still have been preferable."

"Liar."

Rush reached out carefully for his jacket and pulled it into the blankets in between them to warm it up a moment, moving deliberately calmly and casually. After a few seconds he slid out of the blankets. He squatted at the head of the blankets, straightening his clothes. Young regarded him from the blankets a moment.

"You must have been even colder than me." He whispered. "There's nothing of you."

"Shut up." Rush pulled the jacket on.

"Is it so bad admitting you need things from other people too?"

"When it's you it is."

Young snorted.

"Who else would you ask?" He asked Rush, who was dragging his fingers though his hair, combing out the tangles at the back of his neck. "Eli."

Rush gave him a look of disdain.

"Greer?"

Disbelief.

"Volker?"

Disgust.

"I rest my case." Said Young. "At least you know I'll stay quiet about it."

"You're a fucking octopus, all hands and limbs, and you twitch and talk in your sleep."

"You were the one who woke me up in the middle of the night spooning." Young countered.

Rush gave him a disbelieving look.

"Hey, would I make up accidental nightmare fuel like that?" Young shamelessly stole Greer's phrase of earlier in the night.

Vanessa James leaned over them.

"Eli's waking up." She said quietly, face warm with amusement. "You better stop arguing. Just sleep at the back of the cave out of sight tonight, okay?"

They both glared at her. She grinned and walked back to the front of the cave to build the fire up for breakfast.


	4. Reciprocity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A favour owed...

Rush finished his watch and woke Greer quietly, trying not to step on anyone in the night-dark cave.

"Your watch." He said.

"'Kay." Greer rubbed his eyes and slid out of his blankets, taking the gun from Rush.

Rush looked down and shivered, now he was not sitting with his back to the fire he was getting cold and stiff fast. A day of hard physical labour followed by four hours of immobility in the cold had left him bone weary, physically exhausted with deep penetrating muscle aches.

The fire had burned low at the front of the cave and in the faint light he could see sleeping bodies through the cave. Light reflected weakly on a pair of eyes watching him from the back of the cave. Rush sighed, stepped over Vanessa James and stood looking down at Young, in a double nest of blankets, his blankets as well as Young's own. Young lifted the edge of the blankets.

"Don't be goddamned stupid." Muttered Young at him. "I can see you shivering from here."

"Fucking shut up Young." Rush replied in a harsh whisper and slid into the blankets next to him. He almost collapsed into the warmth Young had already built up in the blankets. "And keep your hands to yourself."

He rolled stiffly to face away from Young, trying not to make a noise as tight muscles protested at the change of position. There was silence behind him. They were only inches apart and he lay there, trying to find a comfortable position where he wouldn't roll into Young accidentally, his muscles still complaining at the continued work. He felt Young pull the covers up and pull them in tight to close the gaps and keep out the cold, then flinched as a hand touched his back.

"Relax, I'm not…" There was a pause. "Damn….your back's practically gone into spasm."

"Fuck off."

Fingers started to work at the muscles across his shoulder blades. Rush tensed against the intrusion into his personal space then as the fingertips dug into a particularly painful patch, releasing a knot of muscle he groaned quietly and relaxed a little.

"Why are you doing this?" He demanded in a sharp hiss.

There was a brief change in the position of Young's hands, which Rush's mind interpreted as the feeling of a shrug, translated down Young's arms to his hands.

"Good deed for the day?" Muttered Young. "The fact that I can empathise with back pain and that must be really damn painful. The fact that you'll be tossing and turning for hours otherwise."

"Forgive me if having your hands on me doesn't fill me with confidence."

Young's fingers worked down the muscles either side of Rush's spine then back up again to work the muscles in his shoulders. The touch wasn't deliberately intrusive or sensual, but was deliberate and matter-of-fact. Despite his automatic reaction to Young touching him though, Rush found himself struggling not to curl into the touch as abused muscles warmed and relaxed under Young's fingers and some of the pain retreated.

The warmth, his exhaustion and the lack of pain began seduce him into sleep, Young's hands finished working his back and the last thing he was aware of was rolling over and pulling the covers over his head against the cold before sleep claimed him.

 

Young wasn't entirely sure what he was doing but as soon as his hand had hit Rush's back he'd felt the rock hard tension in the man's back. He'd only intended to get the man's attention, to tell him to relax, but as Rush had shifted under his hand and the muscle under Young's fingers had moved not one jot he'd pressed his fingers in to the rigid muscle and manipulated the knot he'd found until it released. As the small area within the general tension had softened a little under his fingers Rush had groaned, a note so quiet and deep in his chest that Young had felt it through his hands more than heard it. Rush had bitched, as Rush did every time anyone did anything to him that wasn't abusive or aggressive, but Young had ignored him.

And memory had taken over, facilitating the practiced moves of his hands, working out the tensions in the other man's back. This he had done before many times. Gault, one of the geeks he'd had on his gate team had a habit of hunching over things she'd been studying and they'd all got practiced at getting her moving again once she'd stiffened up in the evenings and returned the favour to each other. Sawyer, a great guy with some medic training had had magic fingers he recalled.

God, sometimes it seemed he'd been in command so long he'd lost all sense of the camaraderie of being part of a team. He missed his team. Really missed them. Ingram had his own team and was married, Lomas had made it off Icarus and Gault was in research now after a shot in the hip had invalided her out of a gate team. But she was happy, had settled down with Raj in the end, one of the guys who'd cycled through his team briefly, and was working at Area 51. He remembered Raj well, they'd all called him by the diminutive of his first name as his last name was too damn long to yell in combat. Sawyer was dead, he'd held Sawyer as he bled out under the too pale sun of another planet as weapons fire sailed over their heads where they were hidden behind a rock, poor bastard. All of them a universe away.

He ran his hands over Rush's back, checking his work automatically, but the muscles were relaxed and warm and as he took his hands away, Rush rolled towards him, pulling the covers up over his head and settling with his hand against Young's chest, apparently asleep.

Young only realised he was crying when the breath caught in his throat. He wiped his face with a hand which came away wet. He had no idea why this was hitting him here and now, but the sense of loss was like a stone in his chest. Rush's hand flexed against the front of his shirt and Young tried to slow his breathing, stay silent and still. He could still feel the tears streaming down his face, but it was too dark for anyone to see that. He reached out and put his hand on Rush's arm, needing to feel someone's presence.

Rush shifted in his sleep and moved closer and almost without thinking Young gathered him in, resting his cheek on the other man's head, trying to stifle the involuntary movements of his chest, trying not to hold on too tight, but Rush just shifted a couple of times, put a hand on Young's hip and settled in his sleep with a deep sigh.

Young forced his muscles to relax, took a couple of deep breaths and arms loosely wrapped around the other man, just hung on, not letting go, feeling the tears roll down his face.

He wasn't sure how long he lay there, some time, but when it came, Rush's voice startled him.

"Not that it's an infrequent occurrence," murmured Rush ironically, "but I normally have to talk to people to make them cry."

Young jumped and froze. There was a long pause.

"Old memories." Young whispered eventually.

"Bad ones?"

"Some." Young paused. "Sorry."

Rush shifted his shoulders and Young let go of him abruptly, They both rolled back to lay on their backs, though Young's arm still lay outstretched beneath Rush's head. They lay there in silence.

"You been awake long?"

"Not really." Rush said. Young felt his head turn towards him but didn't meet the man's gaze. "Want to talk about it?"

Not the question he had been anticipating. Damn Rush was just keeping him off balance tonight.

"Not sure if I can explain it." Young felt extremely exposed. "Nostalgia maybe."

"You don't have to tell me, it's not as if you owe me any confidences." Rush said.

There was a hint of challenge in the whisper. Young frowned.

"Okay," he said, a little testily, "I was thinking about my old gate team."

"What happened to them?"

"Nothing, mainly."

There was an expectant silence from the other man.

"They're just a long way away, and a long time ago."

"You miss them? Or what they represent?"

Damn, throwing him every time. Young constantly struggled to stay ahead or at least keep up with him.

"I bet you were a smart kid." Young said with some irritation.

Rush laughed mirthlessly.

"I was a savage little git." He said quietly. "Off the rails, out of control, always in trouble, never home. I missed so much school it was unreal."

Young pulled his head back to stare at Rush in surprise.

"What were you doing?" Young asked him curiously.

Rush shrugged.

"Shopliftin', fightin', setting fire to things, smashin' things up. The usual. Hangin' out wi' the big lads, Stoppin' out all night."

Young realised Rush was staring away out at the ceiling and his voice had dropped from his usual gentle accent into something stronger.

"What happened?" He asked.

Rush turned to look at him again and Young felt him put his hand to his stomach.

"I got stabbed, knifed."

"As a teenager?" Young couldn't work out any timeline on this, he knew Rush had been to university, Oxford, must have studied hard.

Rush gave a bitter laugh.

"Eleven." He said. "Four foot nothin', four and a half stone, what's that, sixty or seventy pounds if that?"

Young stared at him through the dimness. He was a soldier, he'd been stabbed himself and the idea of a small boy being stabbed was almost inconceivable.

"Was it bad?" Young asked quietly.

There was a long pause. Young could hear Rush breathing into the darkness. Suddenly Rush shifted slightly. Young started as Rush took hold of his hand, drawing it down. There was another slight shift of weight, a pull of fabric.

Rush's skin was surprisingly hot under his hand as Rush slid it across his abdomen towards his left hip. Just inside and above his left hip was a twisted lump of scar tissue. It fitted into the hollow of Young's palm, broad and flattened.

"Damn Rush, I thought you said you were knifed. What the hell were you stabbed with?"

"Snapped off pool cue."

Rush slid Young's hand up, leading his fingers to a less perceptible narrow slice of scar, a smooth run of skin across his lower ribs.

"Stanley knife, one of those heavy craft knives with the extendible blades you snap off when they get blunt." Rush took a breath. "The pool cue was ‘cause I was trying to bottle the lad wi' the knife."

Young slid his hand out from under Rush's hand back to the knot of scar tissue on his hip.

"Pool cue."

"Well, snooker cue, same difference."

Young ran his fingers over the scar, rubbed his thumb back and forth over it. Rush's breath hitched.

"What happened?"

Rush shrugged.

"Street fight. Us and another group o' not so little bastards. I was the skinny little tagalong, easy target."

"How old was the other boy."

"Sixteen, eighteen maybe."

Young's thumb circled the scar. He still was having trouble getting his head round a boy of eleven being stabbed with a snapped off pool cue.

"You went to hospital?"

"For quite a while."

"And you decided to change your life. Get educated."

"I met someone in hospital who convinced me I had other options. Showed me something I wanted and showed me how I could get it. Good advice, I've always been able to find a way to be what I needed to get what I wanted."

Rush's hand slid back down to Young's, Young went to move his hand away, but Rush's hand covered his, pressing it against the scar and Young could see he was staring away into the darkness again, as if he wasn't entirely in the here and now.

"It must have hurt."

"Fucking excruciating."

"Where were your parents?"

"Working mostly. Too many kids, too little cash, too little time." Rush let go suddenly and Young drew his hand away, the touch suddenly too much. Rush looked directly at him. "That scar made me the man I am."

Another bitter laugh.

"That is fucked up, Rush."

Rush shrugged.

"And what do you want to be now."

"A survivor."

Young paused.

"And what do you need to be for that."

Rush's accent was pure Glasgow as he spoke.

"Jest tougher then you."

It was like a kick in the guts.

"You really think I'm going to hurt you?"

"Wouldn' be the first time."

That was a low blow. Young stared at Rush, but he was looking away, deliberately not meeting Young's eyes.

"It's been a long time since one of us tried to kill the other." Young said.

Rush muttered something that Young strained to hear, maybe something about being ripped apart.

"You want to explain that?" He demanded of Rush, voice raising a little.

"Hush!" Rush said. "And no, not really."

They lay there in uncomfortable silence, waiting for sleep to arrive which it eventually did.

 

Greer woke them in the morning. There was no time for any discussion, Eli and Volker were already stirring, low voices talking between the heaps of blankets at the front of the cave.

Greer woke James and the two of them sat there talking in front of Young and Rush as they slid quickly out of their blankets.

"You should give that pair a bloody promotion." Rush muttered at Young as he pulled his jacket on.

"I'm coming to that conclusion myself." Young replied quietly, as he peered round the edge of Greer's shoulder.

Eli and Volker however were oblivious, deep in discussion about something, gradually waking the rest of the party and the whole party were quickly back on the move to harvest more of anything they could lay their hands on.

Young found himself working shoulder to shoulder with Rush for most of the day, but nothing was said, and when the time ran out, and he found himself back in the familiar confines of the shuttle, starting the take off sequence, it almost seemed like nothing had ever happened. He took one last look at the volcano and the sea and took off. He had a vague sensation of loss as the sea disappeared away beneath him, clouds hiding the blue water , but the demands of piloting the shuttle forced his mind away from any other concerns.


	5. A fool move?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maybe not the cleverest things he has ever done...

Young had only two days on this ship before his scheduled shore leave via the stones. It was a small mercy really, he and Rush avoided each other even more than usual, and when they were in the same room seem to have brokered an uneasy truce.

Only Greer and James appeared to have noticed any difference though, for obvious reasons and on different occasions they both intervened to distract either himself or Rush. He only realised they were doing it on the second day, but he was grateful. Greer seriously deserved some sort of medal and James also seemed to be raising her game well on the people management stakes. Good, god knows he needed officers with people management skills here, even if it was managing Young himself. And Rush.

They had barely talked. After a night of extended confidences and close proximity Young felt emotionally raw in Rush's presence and even less able to cope with him than usual. He found himself leaving the room shortly after the other man arrived and answers had mostly dropped into the monosyllabic.

He looked up as Rush walked into the mess at breakfast.

"Bridge?" He asked.

There was no hesitation in Rush's response to the rather vague question.

"Brody and Lieutenant Scott."

Young realised the fact that the questions were dropping into the monosyllabic too was far more uncomfortable, as was the fact Rush had answered correctly.

Young nodded his response, looking away immediately. He scraped the last of the food from his bowl and stood. He needed to check in with Lieutenant Scoot and Camile before he went on leave anyway.

His leave was giving him mixed feelings. He was very glad to be getting away from Rush, but less enthused at the prospect of visiting Earth. He stole Scott from the bridge and spent half and hour giving him a formal handover, spoke to Camile for half an hour and went to the stones room.

He took a deep breath and put the stone on the plate.

The three hour standard debrief with General O'Neill, Telford and a bunch of other inter-changeable officers and IOA members was almost a mercy, stopping him having to think about what he was going to do next. It was over all too soon, and this was possibly the only time he would ever want one of those to go on any longer. He stood in the hallway with one of the sergeants detailed to support them on their leave and wondered what the hell he was going to do.

No family to visit, no Emily. He'd signed the house over to her, and everything he hadn't just left with her he'd had stored. Nowhere to go, no place to be, no one to see. He turned to the sergeant.

"Can I get a car? And access to some of my cash."

He picked a good hotel at random, one off the main streets and checked in. The evening loomed large, but he ordered food and rented movies in his room, there were enough he hadn't seen before for god's sake. Sleep caught up with him half way through the final action sequence of a mediocre blockbuster.

He dreamed of the sea, waves washing on the shore. No real pictures just the sound of the sea and animals yammering on the shoreline. The dream seemed so real so near, the sounds, the smell of the sea and the light musk scent of hair. He woke in the semi dark, the sound of waves on the shore fading out as consciousness faded in.

The television was the only light in the room, the movie over and the television having gone back to the movie ordering menu. Young sat looking at the clock. It was 3am. The room was suddenly too small, too unfamiliar, the smell of cleaning products, laundry cleaner and last night's dinner too overwhelming. He stood, pulling on his pants, quickly folding the few things he had unpacked and putting them back in the bag. The television was turned off, a final check that he hadn't left anything and he grabbed the bag and walked out.

He walked out of the elevator and into reception.

"Hi, I'm sorry, I have to check out."

He handed over the credit card, added a tip and signed the slip.

"Thanks. I had a good stay." He lied and walked out.

The car was waiting in the parking garage and he got in, threw the bag in the back and drove.

He drove through the darkness until he reached the sea, driving around till he found a road which dropped down to the shore. By the time he pulled up in a small parking lot by the shore the sky was beginning to lighten with the first glow of dawn. He opened the car window, put his seat back, wrapped his coat round him, curled up in the driver's seat and went to sleep.

A tapping on the window woke him an hour or so later. A police officer was staring in at him. He wound down the window.

"You can't sleep here."

"I'm sorry." He said showing his body's ID. "I'm on leave, I was driving and realised I was too tired to drive safely and pulled up to have a nap."

The police officer seemed somewhat mollified.

"Okay, well, you really ought to find a hotel."

"Can you recommend one, something nice, on the shore? I've got a little money to spend." Young said, deliberately bland, deliberately vague.

The police officer was evidently local as Young came out of the conversation with a selection of hotels to choose from and a variety of good places to eat and visit. The guy had made a few notes as he talked and handed Young a sheet of paper from his notepad. Young thanked him, looked at it and chose a diner at random.

Some time later with a hot breakfast and two or three cups of coffee in him, he got back in the car and found one of the hotels. He had interrogated the waitress in the diner and picked the one that was closest to the shore. It was an old white building, large and sprawling and as he walked in the front door, a large dog wandered up to him.

The man behind the desk looked up and smiled and Young booked a room on the back of the building with a balcony looking out onto the shore. He took the key, a real key not an electronic tag, and walked up to the room. Inside he threw open the doors to the balcony, took off his shoes and slid into the bed fully dressed. He fell asleep again to the sound of the sea.

He spent two restless days wandering round the area, spending time sitting on the veranda with the dog, eating in whichever of the different restaurants as appealed and wasting time. The sole consolation was the amount of sleep he was getting, doors open, waves lulling him into sleep. In his dreams Destiny waited, familiar and safe, with the sounds of waves on the shore floating over.

 

He drove back to Homeworld Command and handed in the car and bag. As he walked back towards the stones room with the sergeant he could feel his breath speeding up and it was terrifying him how much he wanted to be back on Destiny. There was nothing he wanted to be here for. His hands shook as he took the stone from the plate…and was back on Destiny.

He took a deep breath, inhaling the faint metallic scent that underlay everything else on Destiny. Baras finished a sentence Young hadn't heard him start and looked at him as he stood from the chair.

"Colonel."

Baras handed him his radio. Young nodded and took the radio.

He went and found Scott and had the usual handover discussion. There wasn't much to discuss, but he spun out the conversation, and spent a bit of time giving Scott a bit of advice towards developing his leadership skills. Scott sucked it all up like a sponge, and seemed to appreciate the time spent.

Young felt like he was floating through the day, not quite connected to the world. Dinner was terrible, though dinner was always terrible, but Young was still feeling completely unbalanced by his own reactions to returning and barely noticed. He went to his quarters, finished a series of bits of paperwork on a laptop, and sat there, trying not to think. There was a flask of Brody's worst on the table. Young stared at it from the other side of the room, the promise of not having to think, alcohol induced oblivion, tempting him. He didn't trust himself to go any closer to it.

He needed to do something to stop the thoughts turning over and over in his brain. He stripped out of his shirt to his t-shirt, grabbed a bottle of water and leaving the room, took off at a jog. It wasn't hard to find unobserved areas of Destiny to run through and he ran until the breath came hard in his chest and his bad knee ached fiercely, until he was so tired he was stumbling over his own feet.

He slowed to a walk and started to make his way back towards the inhabited areas limping slightly. He hit the showers, washing off the sweat and muck. Cleaner but with a distinct limp he wandered through the inhabited areas of Destiny, running his hands over bulkheads, looking over rooms and wondering what the hell he was doing and when the hell this had become more home than Earth.

The ship was deserted. It was gone midnight and all sane members of the crew were in their beds. Except Rush, of course. The man looked up from where he was sitting as Young took a couple of halting steps into the core room

"Just looking about." Young said, turning to leave.

"Colonel?" Rush said.

Young paused mid turn.

 "Nothing serious, just catching up after leave." He said taking a couple of steps.

"You're limping." Rush said.

"Twisted my knee running."

"Foolish." Rush told him.

"If I wanted your opinion, I'd have asked for it." Young snapped.

"You rarely want my opinion." Rush suggested sardonically.

Young left the room without responding, but paused outside the room to lean on the wall. He'd really done too much on his knee and it throbbed. He waited for the pain to subside a little.

"You're in pain." Rush's voice was close behind him.

He turned his head,

"I'll be fine, I just need to rest it."

"What did you really do to it?" Rush asked.

"Running." Young said. "Actually running. Just too much."

He started to walk again, and Rush paced him, not talking just walking, leaving Young silently at the door of his quarters. Young sat on the edge of his bed and stared at the floor.

Sleep did not come easily and he ghosted through the following two days on autopilot, limping, overtired and trying not to snap at all who crossed his path. Both Eli and Brody caught the raw edge of his tongue and a stand up row with Camile over something trivial did nothing to improve his mood or hers. He retreated to his quarters with the full expectation of another restless night.

Rush was sitting on the edge of his bed waiting, elbows on his knees, chin resting on his hands. He looked up at Young through the curtain of hair.

"What the hell do you want?"

Rush looked at him.

"I don't know what your major problem is Colonel, but you need to sort it out."

Young stared at him.

"What it is is none of your business."

Rush scowled at him.

"It is totally my business when it affects how you interact with the crew and my science team. You look like shit and your behaviour is out of order. Are you even sleeping?"

Young stared at him.

"That's rich coming from you."

"I don't act like you do on that little sleep." Rush said. "Get in the fucking bed Young, get some sleep."

"What makes you think you can come in here and do this?" Young demanded.

"Well you won't accept it from anyone else, you've already reduced Camile to tears, congratulations on that by the way, and your soldiers are all too scared to ask." He flipped his hair back off his face. "I've seen the worst you can do already."

Young took two long steps towards Rush and grabbed him. Rush didn't react just stood there.

"What are you going to do Colonel?" he asked. "Beat me up? That's going to get you a long way, not to mention the reactions it'll get from everyone else."

Young stared at him, hands fisted in the front of Rush's shirt.

"What the fuck is wrong with you Young?" Rush demanded. "What the fuck happened on your leave?"

Young looked at him.

"Oh it's no great leap of deduction to see that it has to be something from Earth." Rush continued.

Young let go of him abruptly, and Rush fell back down onto the edge of the bed. He sat there, looking up at Young.

"Nothing happened." Young said furiously. "Absolutely nothing, for three days. Had no one to see, nowhere to be and I did nothing except stare at the damn sea and sleep. And I was so damn glad to get back to Destiny I almost couldn't get the damn stone off the plate. I was even dreaming about this place."

Young sat down on the edge of the bed.

"The sea?" Rush asked.

"It seemed right at the time." Young said shortly.

Rush looked at him and laughed, a short sour note of mirth. Young rounded on him.

"What the hell is so funny?"

Rush stood.

"No doubt you'll come and find me when you figure it out Colonel. Get some sleep."

He walked out. Young watched as the door hissed closed behind him.

He lay back on the bed and stared at the ceiling, he obviously hadn't followed Rush's line of thought but he was so damn tired his brain was turning over the same thoughts repeatedly without making any sense of their meaning.

Finally, still making no sense of the conversation he stood, walked out and went to find Rush. He wasn't in the core room, or the bridge and Young finally went to his quarters, palming the door release and walking in. Rush was in bed, laying on his side and blinking at Young in the light from the doorway.

"Have you figured it out yet?" Rush asked him.

"No."

"Sit down." Rush gestured at the edge of the bed.

Young looked at him then closed the door walked over and sat on the edge of the bed.

Rush pulled the covers out from under him.

"Get in." He said quietly.

Young stared at him, sleep deprived mind confused and failing to process.

"You are not functioning." Rush said flatly. "Now, I can either deal with your problem here, or I can try and intervene out there to stop you fucking up things even worse than you are already. This option, though more than a little fucked up, involves less bloodshed. Get in."

Rush reached out and pulled him down. Young let himself be pulled into the bed. Rush folded the covers over him.

"Go to sleep Young."

He lay there, on his back for a moment, trying to process his thoughts. Rush lay on his side, looking at Young.

"You're thinking too loudly" Rush said putting a hand on his shoulder.

Young's gave up and he rolled towards Rush, pushing out his hand to rest on Rush's arm, staring at him. Rush's breath was a steady quiet wash of sound, in and out, constant. The bed was warm and he was tired. He felt his eyes drooping and slid in a little closer. Rush sighed and threw an arm over him. Sleep arrived.


	6. Cascade effect

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It was almost unbelievable the way that one act of charity had cascaded to such a previously inconceivable set of situations.

Rush looked at the man now sleeping under his arm, contemplating the idiocy of this course of action. He had considered confronting Young earlier, but couldn't see any better outcome than a further blazing row similar to the one Young had had with Camile. He'd exaggerated Camile's reaction a little, she'd been in tears, but mainly in frustration and irritation rather than being upset.

The outcome of a blazing row between himself and Young was liable to be somewhat more volatile as well. But he couldn't see any other course of action, there wasn't anyone else he could manipulate into a position to address Young's behaviour, and considering recent history he had guessed he at least had a chance of getting some sort of response out of the man if he confronted him in private.

The sea. Fuck.

And that he hadn't expected, but it was immediately apparent the way Young's mind was working, or failing to work. Every action begets reactions. It was almost unbelievable the way that one act of charity had cascaded to such a previously inconceivable set of situations.

And he'd realised with that one statement from Young that this was the only way it was going to happen, the only way to find a temporary resolution to Young's disintegrating behaviour. He was damned if he was going to offer though. Young could damn well come to him.

Fingers flexed against his arm and Rush tucked the other arm a little further around Young. Young's arm slid round Rush's waist, pulling him in. For a moment, Rush tensed, but then he gave up, relaxed and let the sleeping man wrap round him. Bloody octopus. Bloody warm octopus though.

He quit thinking, tucked his head into Young's neck and let himself go to sleep.

 

Young woke. Warm skin under his hand, warm breath drifting over his throat. The sudden realisation of where he was arrived. Rush's quarters. On Destiny. Damn he had to stop waking up like this. One arm was under Rush's neck, the other wrapped round his back, and somehow he had managed to slide his hand up the back of Rush's shirt so it rested on the bare skin of Rush's back. His leg was thrown over Rush's and he couldn't have been any more wrapped around the smaller man. Rush for his part had one hand on Young's chest and the other arm wrapped around Young's waist. He let out the breath he suddenly realised he'd been holding. At least there was no way of mistaking where he was here.

He had slept, the dog tired, disconnected feeling of the previous days was gone. He still felt he could go back to sleep again, doze in the warmth of the bed, but he had no idea what time it was. Where was his radio? Was anyone looking for him? No, because Rush's radio would have woken them both. He wanted to look at the time, but his arm was under Rush and he really didn't want to wake the other man. Definitely didn't want to have the inevitable conversation.

He realised he was rubbing his thumb back and forth across the skin of Rush's back and stopped with a jerk, pulling his hand out from inside Rush's shirt. Rush shifted under his arm. Young paused, but there was no further movement. He settled his free hand back down on Rush's back. He had no idea why he was this wrapped around the other man, it certainly wasn't a typical sleeping position for him, he'd tended to spoon when sharing a bed, loosely, always the outside or spread out with no contact, if it was warm, though it was never really warm here. He wondered again when Destiny had become here and not there, when Earth had become there and not home. He could hear his own voice asking "plus you and me?" and pulled himself back into the present with an effort.

He tried not to wonder how Rush usually slept, he doubted that a United States Air Force Colonel featured highly in it. He should get up. He should get up, sneak out of here without getting caught and never talk about it again.

He lay there for a few moments. There were two major points against that. Firstly, Rush was pretty wired all the time and Young was fairly certain there was no way he could get out without waking Rush. Secondly, and this was the rub, he was pretty certain he owed Rush. The preceding couple of days had been a major fuck up and somehow Rush appeared to have realised what was going on. Which was news to him as he wasn't sure himself what was going on in his own head and he certainly didn't want to indulge in any self examination where this situation was the resolution of it.

He really needed to know what the time was.

"Rush?"

"Mmph?" A vague murmur.

He looked over Rush's head to the table next to the bed. There was a mobile phone there. He lifted his arm to reach out for it. This had the effect of pressing Rush more tightly into his neck and chest. The other man twisted and for a moment he could feel stubbled cheek and lips and hair pressed against his throat as Rush rolled in his arms. He let the other man's weight push him backwards, rolling onto his back, feeling a leg sliding up over his thigh, body pressing into his side. Incredibly Rush did not appear to have woken.

He lifted his arm again carefully but his arm was not so constrained in this position and pressing forwards, scrabbling carefully with his fingertips he was able to pull the phone into his hand, to see it was half five in the morning. Just less than six hours sleep maybe. He considered briefly, feeling Rush breathing gently against his side. He should really get up and leave. But nobody would expect him to be anywhere until seven. His memories of the preceding night were fuzzy, but he vaguely remembered Rush telling him he wasn't functioning properly, and had a clear memory of Rush pulling him into the bed and telling him to sleep and in that one thing at least Rush had been right, he needed to sleep, had really needed to sleep.

Finally he fiddled with the phone, managing to set the alarm for half past six. Just another hour's sleep wouldn't hurt him. He put the phone down quietly then lay there wondering what to do with his arm. It was tucked under Rush's neck and currently outstretched towards the table. Finally he wrapped it round Rush and closed his eyes, just another hour's sleep wouldn't hurt.

 

The alarm woke them both with a start.

Young's arm tensed round Rush and he felt Rush's fingers grip into his side hard.

"What? Fuck." Said Rush blinking.

The phone continued to blare its generic mobile phone alarm. Rush rolled back, pushing Young's arm out flat as he rolled over and grabbed the phone to turn it off. Phone silenced he rolled back over towards Young and regarded him.

"Did you do that?"

Young nodded.

"I didn't want to oversleep."

"You woke up already? I'm surprised you didn't leave Colonel."

Young shrugged with his free shoulder.

"You were right." He said. "I needed to sleep."

Rush's eyebrow quirked.

"So you remember our conversation last night?"

Young frowned.

"Some of it."

Rush sat up, rubbing his jaw with his hand.

"Well, I believe you got the sleep I said you needed." He looked at Young. "I suggest you sneak out now before the corridors get busy. Wouldn' want someone to see you leaving my quarters first thing in the morning."

Young huffed out a breath at the sarcasm, and stood, walking to the door. He turned before he hit the door release. Rush was sitting on the edge of the bed, his back to Young.

"Thanks." He said quietly.

"You're welcome Colonel." Rush said quietly without turning round.

 

 

Rush listened to the door close behind him. It bothered him that Young had evidently woken and moved around, set the alarm, and Rush had not woken up. The idea he could have slept through it…that he had not reacted to Young's presence…

His radio went, thank god.

"Doctor Rush, this is Volker."

He snatched it up gratefully.

"What is it Dale?"

There was a long pause.

"Er, we need you on the Bridge?"

It came out as a surprised question.

"Fine, I'll be there in a moment."

He dragged his fingers through his hair. Put his second t-shirt on and left.


	7. Unsolicited gifts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I wasn't aware you wanted to be on first name terms with your subordinates."
> 
> "I wasn't aware you viewed yourself as one."

A single burned out square component "thingy", was the cause of the complete loss of close range sensors on the port side. Eli had quickly dubbed the components squingies to Rush's complete disgust. Squingies. It sounded like some kind of cheap plastic toy, but Brody and Volker had picked up on the name instantly, the morons, and Rush had to concede he was outnumbered, not that he admitted this. Thankfully they had a large supply of them courtesy of Destiny's double, but Rush, Eli, Brody and Volker spent eight tortuous and frustrating hours checking every single squingy in the conduits and controls between the data hub in the core room and the main sensor hub two decks down and several corridors towards the back of the port side.

Rush threw himself into the work, up to his elbows in conduits, greasy and filthy dirty. They finally located the burned out squingy it not two metres from the port side sensor hub and it was the work of seconds to replace it once located.

He stopped off in the mess hall early evening just long enough to shovel something laughably dubbed vegetable hot pot into his mouth before disappearing back to check the communications conduits to the starboard side. He worked until the small hours before falling into bed for a few hours.

The next few days Rush gave up on any of the bigger projects in favour in losing himself in the depths of the ship checking the equipment that comprised the sensor lines and getting a better idea of how it functioned. Eli, Chloe and surprisingly Lieutenant James tracked him down intermittently, ignoring his complaints and bullying him to eat if he didn't turn up for a meal. He tolerated Chloe who was quiet and practical, goal oriented in making him eat and then letting him get on with it. He was mainly polite to Lieutenant James who simply ordered him to eat, laughingly threatened him with violence if he didn't and then walked off when he had, but snarled at Eli when Eli tried to help him after coaxing him to the mess. Sometimes he almost felt guilty snapping at Eli, but he wasn't in any mood for company, particularly not Eli's brand of cheerful upbeat banter, and Eli sometimes took a while to get the message unless he was blunt. With the exception of these enforced trips to the mess, he made himself absent when he wasn't specifically required for a bridge shift.

The practical side of his efforts was several replaced squingies which made a significant improvement in the quality of sensor readings from both sides of the ship, the academic side of it that he had a much better grasp of what was going on in there, but the amount of time he could spend on it wouldn't last forever. He just wanted a bit of peace and quiet, though he knew that he couldn't continue avoiding people for too long. He was surprised Camile or Young hadn't sent someone out to drag him back to civilisation already.

The drop out of FTL cut off his self imposed isolation three and a half days in. As soon as it happened he packed up his gear with a sigh and walked up to the bridge. There was the usual crowd on there, Young, Brody, Volker, Eli, Chloe, Scott, Greer, Camile standing at the railing. She looked up at him as he walked in, taking in the filthy shirt and untidy hair with raised eyebrows, but evidently thought better of saying anything. Rush knew he must look a state but frankly didn't give a shit.

"Where are we?" he asked.

Several faces turned round in surprise.

"There's no need to look so shocked." He said sharply. "Conduits are dirty." He snapped at continued stares.

Most of them looked away but Young was looking at him from the command chair with a strange expression. Rush ignored it in favour of walking down to look over Brody's shoulder at the console.

"Three planets." He said. "Are any of them useful?"

Brody shrugged.

"One is locked out, but the other two look okay. One's apparently pretty cold, the other is more like earth."

"Food?" he asked.

"There's a good chance." Volker replied from next to him. "Becker's talking about us bringing back some salt water from the next planet with salt seas and the cold one seems to have them under the ice. We can distil it off for water and for salt."

Rush looked at him.

"Food preservation and cooking?" Dale offered.

"I'm aware of what salt is used for."

"How long do we have on the clock?" Young asked from behind him.

"72 hours." Eli said.

"Gateroom." Young ordered, getting up out of the chair, gesturing to Eli and Brody and walking out. Camile and Rush fell in behind.

The kino showed the temperate planet's stargate was located in a wide plain dotted with stands of trees. It was sunny and clear, and there were what looked like large herbivores trundling in herds across the plain.

"Steak!" Brody said staring at the screen.

"Looks like it." Eli said. "Burgers, seriously guys, burgers!"

Young looked at the screen.

"Fine, get a hunting party together. We could all do with some real food presuming they're edible."

Camile looked at the screen over his shoulder.

"If it's safe it might be good to give people some shore leave." She said. "Even if it's just an hour or two sitting in the sun near the gate. Some people haven't been off the ship in almost six months, and it looks like you can see anything coming a long way off there."

"We'll see what the first party find out." Said Young. "If it's safe, then fine. We've got three days, I think we could all do with a bit of open sky."

 

Hunting happened. Once again Varro and the couple of remaining Lucian Alliance crew members accompanied by a few more crew with hunting experience went out with guns and came back with food.

Rush liked to eat as much as the next person, though he would admit to himself he got distracted and forgot sometimes, so with bad grace he let Brody and Becker draw him into a discussion of how to turn an unused compartment into cold storage by messing with the life support controls for that room, which conveniently also kept him out of the core room and bridge during most people's waking hours for a day.

It seemed a sensible idea, but in the end involved a surprisingly large amount of preparation, including insulating considerations and isolating the temperature controls. After a day where he managed to avoid having to deal with anyone else except Brody and Becker, they managed to set a reasonably large room to subzero temperatures and a second room next to it to just above freezing by the simple expedient of omitting the insulation between the two rooms and turning off most of the life support in that room.

"Someone ought to tell the Colonel he can double the amount of hunting." Brody said, shivering in the freezer.

"Double?" queried Becker. "Four times or more, we can hang over twenty carcasses in here."

Rush shivered as he looked around.

"Well I'm sure he'll be very pleased." Rush groused. "I'll just be pleased to get protein that I have to chew."

He walked off to the starboard conduits, leaving the pair of them to share the good news.

 

Young had noticed Rush's absence immediately, and if he hadn't it didn't take long for Camile to point it out. She had tapped on the door frame of his open door before walking in.

"Have you seen Rush?"

"Nope." Young said.

"He's not in the core room or on the bridge."

Young looked up from the laptop on which he was slowly typing up a planet report about the temperate planet, using three fingers on his right hand and two on his left.

"No, he's two decks down on the starboard side in a conduit."

Camile looked at him in surprise, hands on hips.

"You actually know where he is."

Young nodded.

"Chloe and Lieutenant James have been keeping an eye on him. They were worried about him when he didn't show up for dinner and tracked him down. They've been keeping me posted."

Camile gave him a considering look, which Young interpreted as a "maybe you have actually got a handle on the situation here" look. She folded her arms.

"What's he actually doing?"

"According to Eli he's making sure we don't have a sensor failure on the starboard side like we did on the port side four days ago."

Camile pursed her lips and Young regarded her.

"You think that's what he's actually doing?"

Young shrugged.

"Eli's probably right. I couldn't tell any better. Why he's doing it on the other hand? Your guess is as good as mine. But there's nothing else that's a 911 emergency at the moment so it's probably easier to let him get on with it than argue."

"And you're happy with him wandering off on his own?"

Young tilted his head to one side.

"Like I said, I have people keeping an eye on him, he's fixing the ship and I don't need him at the moment. If I need him for something the situation will change."

Young's voice was calm and firm, closing down the discussion. Camile expression was a little tense, but she rocked her head from side to side with a look of acquiescence.

"Trustworthy he isn't," conceded Young, "but he's doing what he's effectively here to do, keep the ship running. This is a pointless issue to challenge him on."

Camile's arms came unfolded and the speculative look returned.

"Seems like a change of heart for you." She noted. "Not long ago you two were butting heads on every issue as a matter of principle."

"It's been a long month Camile." Young said tiredly. She gave him a dry look and he knew she was thinking about the argument. "Exactly" he said, a little contritely. "Still, I'm saving my energy for the big issues."

 

Even so, Young had been surprised to see the state Rush had managed to get himself into when he turned up on the bridge, looking like some sort of vagrant, filthy dirty and hair tangled.

The planet looked like a positive option, all indications was that it was broadly safe with the exceptions of a few larger predators which had been successfully shot when they became a problem during the hunting on the first day. The area around the gate was wide and open and subject to posting armed sentries, it seemed sensible to cycle everybody off the ship for a few hours of R and R.

TJ had been in strong agreement, citing vitamin D deficiency and consequent problems and mental health issues of ship-bound personnel, and that was it, he spent the next few hours organising a shore leave schedule for the next two days.

Rush had, as soon as the planet had been examined via kino, evaporated again, and Young put  him on a shore leave group on the third day. He wasn't sure if Rush would actually take it up, but TJ had been quite clear this was a health issue for the crew.

Eli and Chloe were both off the ship when it came time to track Rush down, but he sent James off to find him and let him know about his trip off the ship. She returned a while later saying she had failed to find Rush anywhere and there had been no answer from his quarters. Young dismissed her and picked up his radio.

"Rush, this is Young."

He waited, no response. Tried again. No response. He gave it a break hen tried again a few times to no avail. Finally he got up and left the room. He swung past the core interface room, the bridge and Rush's corridor just in case, but he wasn't in any of them. Young checked the time. Half past nine in the morning.

Rush's quarters were, unsurprisingly, slightly off the beaten track. Probably better, Young really didn't want anyone to see him just walking into Rush's quarters. He hit the door release and stepped straight in closing it behind him. Rush was curled up, fully dressed in the filthy t-shirts, on top of the covers in a loosely foetal position. He had evidently been asleep and was blinking sleepily at Young which transitioned smoothly into a solid glare.

He stretched out his legs and sat up.

"What do you want Colonel?"

"I'm here to let you know about your shore leave. You weren't around earlier when the allocations were handed out."

"I'm busy." Rush said flatly.

"Yes," Young shot back, "you look really busy, Rush."

He knew as soon as he'd said it, it was a mistake. Rush scowled and swung his legs over the side of the bed.

"Nice to see you value what little time I actually get for sleep."

"Look Rush…" Young started crossly, stabbing a finger out at him.

He stopped, this was senseless, he was about to start a pointless row with a tired, filthy, probably slightly crazy man, with no hope of success, no real point to make and no-one around to even care. He realised Rush was staring at him, probably as he had stopped mid-sentence and zoned out for a moment staring at Rush. He took a deep breath, licked his lips and started again, dropping his hands to his hips.

"TJ says it's a health issue, something to do with sunshine and vitamin deficiency and people going crazy being stuck on a ship. I don't care if you take your lap top and work, or a blanket to lay on and go to sleep, but TJ says for everyone's continued good health we all need a few hours in the sun and we don't know when the next safe planet will be."

He tried to keep his voice neutral. Rush was still watching him intently. Young waited for a response, feeling uncomfortable under the continued scrutiny.

"Vitamin D deficiency." Said Rush finally.

"What?" Young asked. He had been expecting a refusal.

"Vitamin D, the body needs sunlight to manufacture it. The lights on Destiny probably aren't strong enough to prevent vitamin D deficiency."

Young nodded slowly.

"Right."

"Fine." Rush said. "When?"

"Three hours time. We're completely out of synch with the planet's day. That should be dawn."

Rush stood.

"I'd better shower then, hadn't I?"

Young nodded. He turned to leave.

"Colonel?"

Young turned back.

"When's your shore leave?"

Young's brow furrowed a little.

"Same as yours. " he said.

Rush's face clouded a little.

"Keeping tabs on me?"

Young shrugged.

"Didn't think I'd get you off the ship if you thought I might try and subvert your work or science team behind your back." Young replied honestly.

"You don't need me off the ship to do that." Rush pointed out, but despite the sarcasm his expression had returned to neutral.

Young shrugged.

"See you in three hours."

Rush gave him a single nod and Young left quickly.

 

When Young was gone, Rush grabbed his towel, hand towel sized and somewhat threadbare, and his wooden comb, homemade, and made for the showers. In the shower he stripped his clothes quickly and made for the nearest cubicle. The dirt from the conduits was greasy and hard to shift. Contrary to what he'd seen in people's eyes on the bridge and in Young's just five minutes before, he'd had a shower a day whilst working on the sensors, but crawling through access panels got you filthy dirty fast.

He combed the snarls out of his hair, which took some time and was vaguely aware of someone else coming in but when he looked up they had gone without using the showers.

He scrunched most of the water out of his hair and scraped most of the liquid from his skin with the side of his hand, letting it drip from his fingers to the floor. No point in getting his towel any wetter than he had to, it was hard enough getting it dry.

Stepping out of the shower he noticed a stack of black clothes under his grubby t-shirts and jeans. Unfolding the fabric it turned out to be a sleeveless undershirt, underpants, a military shirt, Icarus issue with the name removed and a pair of well worn BDU pants, all clean. He looked at them. It had to be Young, he realised, he was the only one who knew he was coming here. A peace offering maybe.

He pulled them on, leaving the shirt unbuttoned. They weren't a bad fit, only a little large, although the trousers were a little long. He rolled them up a couple of turns and bundling his own clothes up, made his way back to his room.

He caught sight of himself in the mirror as he put his clothes down on the counter. The unaccustomed black clothes and his sharp features and dark eyes suddenly gave him the impression of a crow staring back out of the mirror at him and snorted at the ridiculousness of his own thought. Bird of ill omen indeed.

He folded a spare blanket, grabbed a pillow and tied them together with the belt from his jeans. His laptop needed charging if he was going to take it off the ship on this shore leave and he grabbed it up as well and walked out.

He hadn't been entirely prepared for the strange looks he got and it took him a couple of minutes to realise it was probably the fact he was dressed like one of the soldiers. He ignored the looks and resolved to spend the remaining time in the core room, catching up on what he had meant to read in the database.

Young himself stuck his head in the door two hours later to Rush's slight surprise and slightly greater discomfort.

"You ready to go?"

Rush nodded.

"The clothes." He said. "You?"

Young nodded and shrugged.

"Seemed better than you getting back into the others. You looked a bit…"

Rush cut him off with a nod.

"Whose are they?"

"They were Gorman's." said Young. "It was that or some leather pants from the Lucian Alliance," he grinned, "and somehow I couldn't see you in leather pants."

"Not since I was about twenty five." Rush snorted.

Young gave him a slightly disbelieving look.

"I haven't been old forever." Rush countered the look.

Young raised his eyebrows.

"Hey, have you seen…" Eli walked into the room and they both started.

Young saw Rush's face close down again. Eli gave them both a suspicious look.

"What are you guys doing?"

"Nothing Eli." Rush said. "Nothing important anyway, what did you want?"

Eli looked at him.

"Oh, hey, you actually. TJ sent me to make sure you go off the ship for your sunshine."

He looked awkwardly at Rush, obviously expecting a snapped response. Rush bent down and lifted the bundle of pillow and blanket from behind the console.

"I'm already ready Eli."

"Wow, cool. Hey, you look cool in black, suits you, not that your other stuff…"

"Eli." Rush cut in sharply."

"Uh yeah?"

"Go away."

Eli looked a little affronted.

"The colonel has appointed himself my designated watcher to make sure I get off the ship." Rush slid off the stool. "You can assure TJ that the Colonel will no doubt remove me through the gate at gunpoint should I baulk at the last minute."

Eli looked from Rush to Young a little concerned, shifting from one foot to the other.

"Maybe not gunpoint," Young said mildly, "arm twisted behind the back maybe, or dragged by the collar."

Eli gave them another confused look, as if there was something he thought he must be missing here.

"The colonel is attempting to be funny, Eli. Go. Go tell TJ we are both leaving the ship."

Eli nodded with a little self conscious bob and wandered out.

"I have a name you know." Young said.

Rush looked at him.

"I wasn't aware you wanted to be on first name terms with your subordinates."

"I wasn't aware you viewed yourself as one."

"Touché." Rush said with a quirk of his lips and came out from behind the console. "I suppose I had better make my way to the gate room before Lieutenant Johansen breaks out the big guns, or" he turned and gave Young a sideways look, "you club me over the head and drag me out by my collar."

Young laughed and walked out.

Rush picked up his bundle and laptop and followed him out, they stopped by the mess hall to pick up a couple bottles of water and made their way to the gate room.

The gate room was busy with the excited chatter of the twenty something people waiting for their shore leave. Rush realised most of them were soldiers and people he didn't have regular contact with and was quietly grateful that there was no one who would feel like they had to talk to him. He realised Young was watching him, and gave him a nod.

"Are we all here?" Young asked.

Barnes was there with a check list and she counted off the waiting crowd.

"You're good."

Lieutenant Scott and Camile were waiting by the controls and Rush watched Young walk over and have a quick chat, no doubt handing over command to Scott. Rush himself looked over to Brody who was at the gate controls.

"Don't let Eli and Volker do anything bloody stupid while I'm gone." He said.

Brody gave him a slightly surprised look, but nodded.

"See you in six hours." He replied. "It's nice there."

Rush nodded and turned back as Brody hit the gate controls and the event horizon whooshed out. The soldiers all wandered through in an orderly group followed by a small gaggle of civilians. Rush stood for a moment before the puddle, before he felt Young grab his shoulder.

"Come on Rush."

And he was pulled through.

 

xxxoooxxx

 

Young walked through into warm sun and a gentle breeze. Wide plains spread out ahead of him, and in the distance he could see the faint dark movement that must be a herd of the herbivores. The area had the look of the African savannah, although probably not as hot, Young wouldn't know, he'd never been there. They walked down the steps from the gate platform.

The soldiers and civilians were spreading out and the designated guards taking up their posts. They'd already had their turn at fun on a previous trip. The rest sorted themselves out four of them settling down immediately on blankets to sunbathe or read and the rest quickly setting up a game of touch football with a homemade ball that appeared to be made of a pillow squashed into shape and wrapped in duct tape.

He joined in with the football for a bit until his knee began to ache and raising both hands in defeat he backed out of the game grinning and clapping his "team mates" on the back. His water was on the side line and he wandered over to take a drink.

In the distance herd beasts thundered across the plain. He looked around for Rush. His blanket had been spread out on the grass near the gate, it had to be his, he was the only one who had brought a laptop, which was sat next to what looked like his wadded up shirt, but he wasn't with it.

A stab of concern shot through Young and he looked around, still not seeing him. He strode over to the nearest guard who turned out to be Atienza, sitting staring out from the vantage point of the gate platform.

"Where's Rush?" Young demanded.

"Out there."

Atienza pointed and Young followed his gaze to a small figure standing on a slight rise a couple hundred yards away.

"He's not going anywhere." Said Atienza, "So I guessed I'd just keep an eye on him."

Young nodded. He took another gulp of water, closed the lid of the bottle and walked out towards Rush.

Rush looked unfamiliar, the military undershirt and black pants looking decidedly unmilitary on him, more like some sort of Russian mobster or gang member. The sleeveless undershirt displayed more skin than Young thought he'd ever seen on Rush, normally dressed very conservatively, and despite his slight frame he had a wiry musculature to him. The slightly overlarge pants had no belt and were slung low on his hips, a slight crescent of skin showing across the small of his back. For a second Young had a flashback to the sea cave and the feel of Rush's scar under his hand and suddenly, maybe, he could see the small savage boy surviving a little in this Rush.

He walked up the slight slope to join him.

"Young." Rush greeted him without turning.

"Rush."

"You'd be the only one who'd be coming out to find me." Rush said, answering Young's unspoken question.

He offered Rush the canteen, watching as Rush took a swig without taking his eyes off the herd of herbivores in the distance.

"You okay?"

"I'm fine."

Young didn't push the issue, took back the canteen as it was offered to him, looking down to re-cap it and noticing that Rush was barefoot, his narrow feet covered with powdery dirt.

They stood for a while, looking out over the plains, Young glanced at Rush a few times but Rush was face front, not turning and it was only when he shifted his weight and moved a half pace forwards he realised that Rush's eyes were slightly reddened, as if maybe he'd been crying.

Young sighed, took another gulp of water, handed it over and waited. Rush would either talk or he wouldn't, Young couldn't force him. They watched the herd ebb and flow, a sudden rush of beasts from the edge of the herd out across the plains seemed to startle Rush and Young saw him shudder as if something had walked over his grave.

"I killed Simeon with a stampede of wild creatures." He said finally. "I wasn't stupid enough to think I could take him in a fair fight, so I ran him down with a herd of beasts larger than a cow, then put a bullet through his head as he lay bleeding on the floor."

Rush took a drink of water.

"Bastard." He said viciously.

Young could see there were tears in his eyes again and turned his gaze forward, giving the man some privacy. A stifled sob startled him.

"You want me to go?" he offered.

"Go, stay, I don't care." Rush said. "Doesn't matter either way."

He folded at the knees and dropped to sit on the ground with his legs drawn up, arms wrapped round them, hand pressed to his mouth, eyes streaming with tears. After a moments reflection, Young dropped to the ground next to him, reached out and put a hand on Rush's shoulder.

"Was fine until I saw those damn beasts." Muttered Rush.

Young settled himself, shifting till he was sitting shoulder to shoulder with the other man. He could feel Rush's quiet sobs, his shoulder hitching against Young's. Cautiously, expecting abuse or to be thrown off, Young put an arm round Rush's shoulders. Rush continued to cry quietly, but leant in very slightly. Young stared out at the plains, not moving.

"Little Miss Brilliant I called her."

"You were friends for quite a while?" Young ventured.

"A few years." He said. "She was smart and kind and didn't expect me to be anything I wasn't. She was bloody brilliant."

He was silent for a long while before he spoke again.

"Fine holiday this is."

"Funny how something random can spark off things you thought were over." Young said.

"Too fucking right.

The sun was warm on his back, and Rush's skin warm under his arm where it rested across the other man's shoulders. The long grass swaying in the slight breeze was slightly soporific and Young found himself relaxing, his mind turning over random thoughts vaguely, nothing particularly serious. He mused the possibility of making leather from the herd animal hides, food, salt supplies which were being retrieved from the ice planet, the possibility that the heating in his room could be fixed if they'd managed to create cold storage, which hadn't even occurred to him.

"Colonel? This is Atienza."

The burst of sound from his radio startled both of them and they jumped. Young fumbled the radio out of his thigh pocket one handed. He'd forgotten it was even in there.

"Atienza? This is Young."

"Sorry Colonel, you disappeared."

"We're sitting down."

"Long grass." Atienza said in realisation. "Sorry."

"No problem, if we're not back in thirty I'll call in again." Young slid the radio back in his pocket.

Rush had turned away a little and was wiping over his face with a handful of water from Young's canteen. As he had turned Young's hand had slipped to his waist.

"You okay?" he asked Rush.

Rush looked over his shoulder.

"I'll be fine."

Young nodded. "You're always ‘fine'." He replied.

He patted Rush on the hip. Rush huffed. Young took his arm back.

"Wanna hang out here for a bit longer?" He asked Rush.

"Yeah, it's not as if I have much else to do."

Young lay back in the grass and made himself comfortable. Rush sat forward and wrapped his arms round his knees staring out over the plains.

They sat for about 20 minutes until Young's nose twitched. Smoke. Grassfires were damn dangerous. He stood fast, looking for the fire. Rush looked up at him in surprise.

"What is it?"

"Smoke." He turned and saw a small line of smoke rising from near the gate. "I better go back, it looks like they've lit a fire. You coming?"

Rush unwrapped his arms from his knees. Young offered him a hand and hauled him up and they walked back towards the gate. When they got back there, it was less worrisome than Young had realised. Varro and the hunting party were there with a set of carcasses on a kino sled and they'd set up a cookfire by the gate, in a large area of clear dirt where they'd cut away the turf. Young walked up, noting Rush had retreated to his blanket.

"What are you burning?" Young asked.

"Mainly dung." Varro replied.

Strips of meat interspersed with white vegetable looking chunks were cooking on sticks over the fire. The smell of the kebabs was mouth watering. Young watched them cook, grabbing four and walking over to Rush's blanket when they were cooked.

"Lunch?" He asked. Rush looked up from the lap top. "It's real food. Meat and vegetables."

He offered Rush two of the kebabs then sat down on the blanket next to him. Rush took the skewers. They ate in silence for a moment, Young trying not to eat too fast. The meat was frankly an orgasm in his mouth after weeks of vegetables and protein slop and the white stuff was soft and thick like banana but savoury with a root vegetable like taste. Rush seemed to be equally absorbed in his meal.

"Feeling better?" he asked.

"Better for food." Rush agreed, looking up as a soldier came over with more.

Neither of them turned down the offered food and Young watched as the entire party slowed from picnic party levels to relaxed satiety. He spread himself out on Rush's blanket and was surprised as Rush sprawled out on his side, still with his laptop, but relaxed. Young wadded his jacket up under his head, shoved his t-shirt sleeves up over his shoulders and spread out to doze in the sun.

Four hours passed in more relaxed quiet, and when he realised Rush was actually dozing in the sun as well Young thought he might even have enjoyed some of this.


	8. Expedition

Young was glad he'd agreed with Camile's shore leave suggestion, as once Destiny dropped into FTL after leaving the plains planet, she showed little inclination of dropping out again. Rush and the science team had been checking the data base and said it was something about the area of space they were passing through made dropping out a risky proposition at best and so the crew battened down the metaphorical hatches and set their minds to lasting out the long haul.

Young was thankful for the hunting and foraging on the plains planet and the cold storage that had made the supply of meat a feasible option. Becker was under orders to make it last as long as possible, but they were eating a least a small amount of meat two or sometimes even three times a week, with one of those meals a real meat meal. Eli had finally even got his herbivore-burgers made from the butchery scraps, but tasty none the less even without buns.

Rush appeared to have settled again and was back to his normal routine of bridge shifts and working too late playing with the database and the ship itself. Even he looked a little better for a bit of sun and some good meals. They managed largely to avoid talking to each other, on any thing but a strictly professional basis for over a week until he came in to the bridge to find Eli badgering Rush.

"Come on, you must have a favourite song."

Young realised immediately what was going on. As self appointed entertainments officer, Eli was always thinking up new diversions and the current diversion was "name the favourite track". In an attempt to drag out the supply of movies, Eli and his partners in crime Airman O'Hara and Calvos, the former Lucian Alliance member had organised a guess whose favourite track this is competition. Calvos, Eli appeared to have somehow wooed over to Tauri cultural entertainments with a combination of Star Wars, wrestling and pop music, and he seemed to be rapidly developing a minor obsession for boy bands and action movies. Weird.

"Yes, I have several things I like to listen to, however I have no interest in sharing them with the whole of the crew."

"But everyone's joining in." Eli's wheedled, voice coaxing.

"No, Eli. And I seriously doubt all the crew are participating. Dr Marshall has a hearing impairment and the Lucian Alliance crew don't have iPods."

"Calvos is."

"Calvos would, he's got an unhealthy interest in you." Rush snapped.

"What do you mean unhealthy interest?"

"You'll figure it out eventually. Go away Eli." Rush's voice was flat, shutting down the conversation.

Eli scowled and wandered off, passing Young. Young cast his eyes over the bridge crew. Brody was keeping his head down, and James and Varro who was sat next to Chloe being shown how to monitor the sensors were sharing an amused look.

"Does Calvos really have a thing for Eli?" Young asked Rush, who was sitting in the command chair, an open laptop on his lap.

There was a giggle from James and a snort from Varro. Rush gave Young a long look.

"I'll take that as a yes then."

"If it is any comfort," Varro said. "Calvos is aware that Eli is, ah, straight you call it? Not interested in men."

Young looked around, then shrugged.

"Explains his taste in music." He said. "Are you really not providing a song for Eli?" he asked Rush.

"It's a ridiculous exercise." Rush said. "And I don't feel the need to share my personal interests with the crew."

"I suspect most of them think you don't have any." Young said leaning on the railing.

"Well they'd be wrong." Rush said.

Young decided not to push the issue.

"Anything happening?" He asked.

"Nothing" said Rush.

"'Kay."

Young left the bridge to do some paperwork.

 

It wasn't until he had finished his paperwork, had dinner, joined a workout session with some of the marines and had a shower that he made it back to the quiet of his own room. There was a small piece of scrap decking on his desk with an MP3 player sitting on it and a message chalked on it.

"Just press play. I'll have it back tomorrow."

Trust Rush not to waste paper.

He put the headphones in and laid back on the bed. The sound of echoing violins, fluid over pizzicato wrapped round him. Classical, kind of. The violins seemed to wrap around each other as the music flowed on.

Finally the track ended and the playlist moved on, some stuff that sounded folk, more classical, some more modern stuff, he recognised Cream and a couple other recent bands, all interspersed together, but once it had finished it was the first track he went back to and he fell asleep with the violins wrapping around him.

 

He woke tangled in the headphone cables, and had to take a second to untangle himself. It surprised him a little that Rush had bothered to share anything with him. He had liked some of the music though. He looked at the time. Not quite 6 am, unlikely any of the science team would be up. He knew where what he wanted was.

The box of assorted cables was in the core interface room, an old ancient crate full of assorted cables and connectors, all labelled, some homemade. He sorted through till he found what he wanted and connecting the MP3 player to his borrowed walkman, dragged the whole playlist across, then with a further thought, the whole of the violin album. He unconnected the music player and put it in his pocket. He would have time to give it back later.

He went to the mess hall, knowing Becker would be up by now and that care of the grass and plants on the plains planet, there was a supply of something approximating flour and hence something approximating bread. Breakfast was considerably more fun when it wasn't liquid again. Breakfast this particular morning was some kind of flatbread, soft tortilla kind of thing, dipped in reheated gravy from last nights stew, tasty enough and more importantly not protein slop or porridge.

He wasn't quite the first one to arrive, but the other two people there, a couple of the soldiers and a very bleary looking Chloe who he recalled had an early bridge shift, were all virtually silent and focussed eating their breakfast and drinking the strange herbal tea. Young took his cup and plate with two flatbreads and a small puddle of gravy and sat down at an empty table.

He sat there in silence, focussed entirely on the bread and gravy and only noticed Rush when he sat down opposite him. Young looked up in surprise.

"Morning."

Rush nodded and turned his attention to his own breakfast. As usual he ate neatly, methodically and fast. Young found himself with his eyes fixed on Rush's plate, watching the man's hands as they tore small strips of bread, swiping them through the gravy and disappearing upwards out of view. The other man finished his food even before Young. He finished his own food and sat there sipping his tea and staring vaguely at the table.

"I know we're still working towards fixing the dome, but I'd suggest now would be a good time to undertake a bit more exploration of the ship Colonel." Rush said.

Young jumped. He shook his head. Rush was looking at him.

"What? Oh, yeah."

"From what I can tell we are going to be in FTL for at least another six weeks, maybe more, so we won't have to worry about anybody attacking us, and it will give the crew something to do."

Young looked at him. The idea had some merit, if only as a morale booster.

"Is there anything you think we ought to investigate particularly?"

Rush shrugged. "Many things."

"Helpful, Rush, very helpful"

Rush scowled at him briefly, then leaned forward intently in his chair, eyes fixed on Young.

"Apparently there is a larger medical facility somewhere in the ship, possibly more than one. I think Lieutenant Johansen would be interested in that. Also there are some manufacturing facilities and there is storage further towards the back of the ship."

Young leaned forward towards him.

"You got all this from the database?"

Rush nodded and picked up his tea.

"You got a map?" Young queried.

"Of course, but it's only a floor plan, there isn't any detail on what the rooms are necessarily used for, people never lived on Destiny, so I don't think they ever finalised the room allocations on the map. Or if they did I haven't found it yet. I think I've identified another medical facility though and possibly a workshop of some kind based on the layout and what systems are connected to them."

Young downed the last of his tea.

"Are they close?"

"No, not at all, and the medical facility at least would involve travelling through a very damaged area of the ship."

Young looked at him.

"Show me the map and we'll work out a couple of teams."

A faint look of surprise from Rush, evidently he hadn't expected Young to agree, and he nodded, brows slightly furrowed. Young nodded back with a tight lipped smile. He dug in his pocket and pulled out the MP3 player, coiling the headphone cables round it. He slid it across the table.

"Thanks, by the way."

"You liked it."

Young nodded.

"Particularly the first track."

Another faint look of surprise, Rush scrutinised his face.

"I'm glad." Rush said after a moment. "Look, I have a couple of things to do, I'll meet you in the core room in say, half an hour?"

"Make it the small room on the same corridor," Young said looking around "I don't want to be getting people's hopes up until we've got a firm plan, but yeah, half an hour."

 

In the small room, which Young thought of as having been intended as someone's private office, but which the current crew barely used, Rush brought the floor plan up on the single console to show Young. The two rooms he indicated were in opposite directions, the possible medical room towards the front of the ship and the possible workshop towards the back.

The workshop seemed a safer option to access. Rush's basis for his tentative identification was the amount of power systems that fed into various parts of the room, and reasonably sophisticated variation on Destiny's normal fire and air quality management systems and the way the layout diagram seemed to show equipment in there.

They sat heads together, hunched over the console and Young traced routes through with his fingers, as Rush overlaid damage maps over the floor plan, skipping up and down between decks. It looked like there was at least one reasonably safe route to the workroom, with only three shifts of deck to avoid major hull breaches.

The medical room was a much more difficult proposition. Accessing it involved passing through some areas that had suffered badly from the drone bombardment as well as areas that had already been damaged before they had even arrived. Rush's identification of this room was largely based on the fact the power and life support requirements of the room were practically identical to that of the infirmary, but on a larger scale, and it appeared the room was maybe twice as large.

"I think we should try both." Rush said. "We won't want to send large parties the first time, just to identify what the rooms are, see if my surmises are correct."

Young nodded.

"It would make sense to just send a small exploratory party to each." He agreed. "I think we're ready to broach this with the command team."

Rush gave him a withering look.

"They've kept us alive so far." Young retorted.

"We've kept us alive so far."

Young was a little surprised Rush included him in that statement.

"All on our own with no help." Young gave Rush an amused look. "No Eli, no Scott, no Chloe, no Greer, no Brody."

Rush scowled, but his scowl was twisted a little with a slight smile.

"Definitely no Volker." He snapped out.

"You rate them as much as I do. You'd be lost without your team." Young said, mockingly.

"Well, maybe Chloe."

 

Two days passed quite quickly, with plans being made, changed and routes planned out. They decided on teams of three for the first attempts to access the rooms. Young wasn't enthused with Rush's plan to be part of the teams, but even he could see the benefits of better medical facilities so he acceded to Rush joining that party additionally. With Rush would go TJ, Greer and Barnes. On the basis that the other room may be a manufacturing facility or workroom, Rush delegated Brody as an engineer and Young allocated James and Baras, whose father was a mechanic and might actually be able to be of some use to Brody.

Rush spent most of the time either on the bridge or in the core room with Volker and Brody, checking the levels of the shields and ensuring that Volker would be able to dial them up over specific areas if required. Apparently it wasn't easy, but then Young thought, what ever was on Destiny. He took over the second daytime bridge shift from Scott and told him to get some sleep, Scott had ended up with the short end of the wedge, with so many senior crew on missions tomorrow he was pulling the night shift as well, although Young had extended his own shift to cut Scott's down.

He was there the next morning to see the parties off. He'd got the whole day on the Bridge but Volker was there anyway so Young could keep up on what was going on and keep track of how they were progressing. The two groups both looked pretty upbeat as they met up by the door to the mostly unaccessed sections. Greer looked more than happy to be doing anything, as did James and Baras, and TJ had already expressed her interest in the mission. Brody was his usual laconic self, saying little, just watching everyone else and taking it all in. Young made a few suggestions to Greer and James, who listened attentively as was expected. He had a quiet word with TJ, and finally turned to Rush who was waiting impatiently by the hatchway, ignoring Eli who had two kinos ready to follow the parties.

"You're ready."

"Of course. We're all ready. Surely there isn't anything else that needs to be said?"

"No, probably not." Hands on hips he gave Rush a long look. "Don't do anything stupid, don't take any unnecessary risks. We don't need anything enough to risk any of you getting killed or injured, do you understand?"

"Yeah, yeah, that's quite clear Colonel." Rush snapped.

Young hit the door release himself.

"Keep in touch."

He watched them walk to the turn at the end of the corridor, then split up and go in opposite directions.

"Damn." He said.

He just knew this was not going to go smoothly.

The veneer of professionalism, the mask of command was easy to put back on before he turned away. Eli was standing behind him, already watching the kino feed, from the audio swapping between the two parties and from the muttering checking the kinos were set to follow correctly. Young still couldn't shake the nagging feeling on unease though.

"Eli."

The young man looked up a little startled.

"Bridge." Young told him.

"Oh okay."

He set off towards the bridge and heard Eli fall into step behind him. Volker was already waiting with Varro and Chang on the bridge and Young was glad they'd begun training people up and widening the pool of bridge crew.

Young took the command chair and listened as Eli said a few words to Volker and a display on Volker's console and shortly after that the one by the command chair synched to the kino feeds.

"Can you get me a progress map?" Young asked Eli.

Young decided he seriously needed to learn more of the commands used on the console menus, maybe even consider learning some Ancient, however once the map appeared holographically in the air by the Command chair he knew enough to pan and zoom in and out. Eli had obviously managed to add the planned routes as these showed green and the parties showed as little groups of blue dots.

The first hour went slowly, both parties seemed to be making slow by steady progress, only slowed by the need to open the occasional stuck door manually, and the fact they were attempting to identify the larger rooms as they passed them.

Young knew that Destiny's original crew complement was intended to be in the hundreds or even more, but he still found it hard to believe how much of the ship was actually a floating city. Moving forwards there were a lot more crew quarters, some of which appeared to be arranged for families, several open areas like the observation deck, what appeared to be something like a lecture theatre and some evident office type areas.

Brody's party was passing through more engineering areas. Brody, Volker, Eli and occasionally Rush by relayed kino feed were identifying some of what they were passing as parts of the life support and the sublight drive, part of which apparently speared into the centre of the ship away from the FTL drives.

The first major hitch appeared when Rush's party reached a door which would not open even manually.

"Can you bypass the local door controls?" Young asked Eli.

"Wait, wait, let me look." Eli started tapping hastily through screens.

"Young this is Rush, what are they doing?"

Young saw Eli snatch up his radio.

"You really do not want to open that door, it's closed for a reason."

"That would be an obvious assumption Eli." Came the predictably sarcastic response.

"Hey, you want me to just open it so you can take a look?" Eli snapped back.

Young stifled a smile. They all waited while Eli checked systems and sensors. Finally Eli picked up the radio again.

"Okay I think I was right the first time I looked, I think this is telling me there's some kind of leak in there, some sort of fluid."

"Read it out Eli." Rush ordered.

Eli read a couple of short statements back to Rush. There was a pause before the radio crackled again.

"If you had ‘a' opened the door, it would ha' been decidedly cold in here." Rush said flatly. "Terminally so, from the ankles upwards. You'll have t' find us a way round."

"What is it?" Young asked into his radio.

"Coolant fluid. It's very cold, way below freezing." Rush said. "There's a system venting coolant fluid into that compartment. We'll have to fix it eventually as it's a power drain, but not today."

Young sat back in the chair as Eli started plotting a route round the affected area. It was going to take them significantly out of their way, but was unavoidable. He hoped that it wouldn't add too much time to the journey. While Rush and TJs party cooled their heels waiting for Eli to redirect them, he turned his attention to Brody's party. They appeared to be making considerably better speed than the others.

"Brody this is Young."

"Brody here."

"How's it going?"

"Pretty good." Brody said. "We're past the area Rush thought would have the most damage."

Young looked at the map.

"Looks like you'll be there within half an hour if you keep up that pace."

He sat back and watched as Eli and Volker replanned the route to the suspected medical facility and the three green dots that indicated Brody's team crept closer to the possible workshop. Finally, Eli grabbed the radio and started directing Rush's party the long way round.

"Colonel, this is Brody."

"Brody. What's the news?"

"We've arrived."

He listened in as Brody, James and Baras explored the room, catching occasional snatches of discussion. The room was apparently full of equipment, but they seemed to be confused about the machinery in the room and Young listened in as Brody radioed back to Volker and Eli to discuss some apparently technical Ancient written on the machinery.

Volker started to laugh, and Eli was stifling a giggle.

"Okay, okay." Came Brody's voice on the radio. "It's a bust."

"What is it?" Young asked.

Volker and Eli descended into gales of laughter. Young picked up the radio.

"Brody, have you identified the contents of the room?"

"Yeah, yeah we have." Brody said.

"What is it."

Eli fell off his chair.

"It's a kitchen." Brody said. "A really big kitchen."


	9. Hypothermia

Rush's party sat waiting for quite sometime while Eli and Volker ran sensor sweeps along possible routes.

"I think we're going to have problems." Volker told Young. "The other possible routes all have significant hull damage from drone attacks. The benefits of the original route you and Rush mapped out was that it avoided major hull breaches."

"Is there a safe route?"

Volker looked concerned.

"There's a saf-er route." He said. "We can take them down a deck underneath where they are now. It's a little close to a couple of deep hull breaches on Destiny's underside, but it's the best option so far."

Young leaned back in the chair checking the progress of both parties. Brody's party were on their way back already, journey speeded by the fact they knew where they were going and had fixed all the stuck doors and other issues on the way there. He picked up the radio.

"Rush, TJ this is Young."

"Young, tell me we're moving." Rush's voice was filled with frustration.

"Volker and Eli have a route, but it's risky. It's taking you under the area you're in now and they've got some other issues with it."

Young could almost see Rush's restless scowl before the man spoke again.

"Put Volker on."

Young listened to Rush discussing the problems with Eli and Volker. From the previous explanation and the parts of the conversation he actually understood, it appeared that Eli and Volker's main additional concerns were the fact that the sensors were down in part of the area and they were getting fluctuating readings from the power grid. Eli directed them a couple of corridors along to a working console and started sending Rush data. TJ and Rush were both in favour of taking the risk even if they had to walk through part of it in the dark.

"I can hook some of the sensors back up as we're going." Rush said. "Presuming there are local consoles along the route."

"There should be another whole computer core down there." Eli said. "Not as large, but it's the one you pointed out on the map."

"If it's even working." Rush replied. "With the coolant draining out there's a good chance that most of it is fried beyond repair."

Young could see Volker nodding. He caught the man's eye.

"Have you got any hard data on the risks?" Young asked him.

Volker shook his head.

"No, not without being down there. The sensors are completely out in a two corridor block. The surrounding area sensors look fine. The temperature's a little cool, but it's pretty close to the coolant leak area and several hull breaches so we're losing heat across that area anyway."

"Fine." Young said.

He picked up his radio.

"Okay, Rush, TJ, you have a go."

"Finally."

Young sighed leaning his elbow on the arm of the chair and catching Volker's eye who raised an eyebrow with a slight smile.

"It's pretty beat up down there." Young said.

"Tell me something I don't know Colonel." Rush's sarcasm was as thick as always.

"Take it carefully, Rush. Don't make me come down there to pull your ass out of trouble."

He watched as the group were routed back through the area they had just passed through, down an elevator, and in a circuitous route through corridors. There was no stopping to examine things in this area, just the occasional pause whilst Rush stopped to log in to a console and reconnect sensors wherever possible, or unlock a bulkhead door that was unresponsive to Eli or Volker's efforts from the bridge. Or just unresponsive to Eli and Volker's efforts, Young thought. The man was a menace but he was quick.

"Okay." Eli had the radio in his left hand and was tapping frantically with the right. "This is where our sensor readings drop out completely. It's not even responded to that last data ping you did."

"What about now?"

Eli watched to see if whatever Rush had done was showing, Volker leaning over his shoulder shaking his head.

"Nope, nothing." Eli said. "We're blind."

"I'll try once we get in there, there should be a couple of consoles in the first room."

"Okay."

Young lifted his radio.

"Keep in touch." He ordered. "Regularly. Remember we don't know where you'll be, you have to tell us until you come out of the other side."

There was no pause before Rush shot back.

"Yes Colonel, I think I'm aware of that."

Eli looked back at Young and rolled his eyes. Young shrugged, any response was pointless. There was a short pause and then Greer came on the radio.

"Colonel, Doctor Rush is just opening the door now."

"Thank you Sergeant." Young said, trying not to sound too grateful that Greer at least had sense.

He watched as the four blue dots disappeared from the map.

"Okay, we're in a room, and it's quite cold in here." Greer reported. "Rush has found a console, he says he's trying to restore some of the sensors."

Young waited. He could see Eli and Volker hovering over the console.

"Can you see anything?" he asked them.

"Not so far." Volker said. He took the radio. "Ah Doctor Rush, what are you trying to do?"

There was a long pause.

"There's power in here, though it's not great, but I'm not picking up the sensors at all."

"Uh…" Eli's voice was uncertain. Eli snatched the radio from Volker. "Doctor there's a serious power fluctuation in the areas around you, whatever you're doing seems to be having some kind of effect."

This time the pause for a response was shorter.

"It's having fuck all effect in here."

Young laughed.

Eli was leaning over the console.

"Uh, Doctor Rush, whatever you're doing is causing some serious instability in the local power grid."

"There's no reason why it should."

"I don't know about that, but it is."

Young's bad feeling was definitely pulling at the edge of his mind again.

"Just hold on." Rush's voice was sharp.

"Still fluctuating."

"I'm not doing anything, and based on what I can see here there's absolutely no reason there should be any fluctuations. What are you seeing Eli?"

Eli started describing readings. Young took a moment to check Brody's party, who were almost halfway back. They seemed to be fine, the kino feed showed them talking about food. He turned his attention back to Rush's party on that kino feed. Greer, TJ and Barnes were watching as Rush worked at a console. The lighting in the room was dim, but not poor enough that the kino had flicked to night vision.

"Well, we'll be having to manually open doors if we can't stabilise the power in this section, and that'll slow us up further." Rush sounded irritated. Back to default setting.

Young looked up at Eli and Volker looking at each other then Eli lifted the radio again.

"What about if you…"

There was a rapid back and forth that Young did not understand, and from the look on his face, Volker was having trouble following it as well in places.

"Well I can divert some of the power from the deck above down to you." Said Eli finally.

"I'm not sure that's a good idea." Rush said. "We're risking overloading the…fuck!"

Young started, staring at the kino feed. It had dropped into night-vision. He could see Rush groping for the console and TJ and Barnes patting at pockets before with a bright flare the kino flicked back into normal video as flashlights were turned on.

"Oh no!" Eli was tapping frantically at the console.

"What's happened?" Young demanded into his radio, leaning forward in his chair, staring at Eli and Volker as he listened intently to the radio.

"The power's just dropped out in a whole area of the ship." Eli said, voice high and strained.

"Shield's have thinned thirty seven percent in that area." Volker called over. "I'm boosting the neighbouring emitters to cover some of that."

"Colonel?" It was Greer's voice, his normal lilting tone. "It's gone awfully dark in here."

Greer was looking up at the kino, frowning. In the background he could see Rush pulling open a panel on the console.

"What are you doing?"

"Rush is checking the console, but we appear to have no power here."

Young stood.

"Eli?"

"I'm looking, I'm looking!"

He waited, hand clenched on the edge of a console, eyes flicking from where Rush was working on the dead console by flashlight to where Eli and Volker were frantically working at the screens in front of him.

"Eli?" he growled.

"Look, just let me work!"

Volker turned back to Young.

"Power just shut off, not only in the section they're in, but neighbouring sections and part of the route they've already travelled through."

Volker didn't look happy.

"The implications?"

Volker shot him a nervous look.

"No heat, no light and in the area they are in, the doors will be shut and inoperable."

"So they're trapped?"

"Yes, at the moment. But Eli's trying to reroute power."

"Help him." Young ordered. He  could hear raised voices from the kino feed and put the radio to his lips. "Greer?"

"Yeah Colonel."

"How's it going?"

"It's pretty cold in here. We've got flashlightes so we've got light, but Rush has had to give up on trying to fire things up this end. He says the power loss is external to this section. He can't fix it from in here. He's not very happy about that sir."

 _I'll bet he's not,_ thought Young.

"Fine, Eli and Volker are trying to restore power from this end. We'll keep you posted."

Twenty minutes passed. Brody and his party were almost back, but it didn't seem like Eli and Volker were making any progress at all. Young sat in the chair frustrated. Greer, TJ and Rush speaking with them on a regular basis, TJ and Greer to update on their situation and Rush to consult with or berate Eli. In the kino feed they sat or walked around, and intermittently Rush had another go at part of the console.

"It's getting pretty cold in here." Greer reported.

On the screen Young could see Rush was on his back half in a conduit and could hear his muffled voice. Greer passed on the message.

"Rush thinks that's a bit odd, but it may be because the hull breaches are so big the shields aren't strong enough to hold in the heat as well as the air."

Eli and Volker were still having no success and Young rubbed at his face.

"We're gonna have to get them out." He said.

Eli spun to look at him.

"It'll take you hours to get to them, and you'll have to force the door open." He said. "If we can just get…"

Young stepped off the dais.

"You've got twenty minutes Eli. No more."

Time passed, Young checked his watch. Brody walked back onto the bridge and joined Eli and Volker. Young drummed his fingers on the railing.

"Bridge? This is TJ." TJ's voice sounded shaky. "Are you any closer to getting us out?"

Young pulled his radio from his belt.

"What is it TJ?"

"It's getting really cold in here. We're sitting together for warmth, but I can see my breath in the air and we're pretty chilled. We really need you to be getting us out of here."

He moved back to the chair to look at the kino feed. All four were sitting down now, shoulder to shoulder and Greer had an arm round Barnes' shoulder. He could see from here they were all shivering. Young stepped down onto the deck.

"That's it Eli, we're going down there." Lifting the radio again he spoke. "Scott, you awake?"

There was a long pause.

"Yes sir."

"Take Chloe," Eli interrupted, "we need to stay here and try and increase the shields to stop them losing any more heat or air. We can talk her through stuff."

Young hit the radio button again.

"Get yourself, Chloe and a small party ready. The infirmary party are trapped, we need to get down there and get them out ASAP."

There was no hesitation.

"I'll meet you by the exit in five minutes. Scott out."

Volker rushed out and came back in a few seconds later with a bag.

"Batteries for Chloe, she may be able to power up some of the doors with them."

Young took the bag and strode out.

Young led the party out at a ground eating trot, the bridge crew giving directions as they went. Most of the significant problems between here and the powered down area had been resolved at least temporarily when the previous party had passed through and slowed them down little, though he was glad Eli and Volker had sent Chloe rather than one of themselves for the simple reason she was fitter and having little problem maintaining the pace the military set.

Anxiety was making his heart race faster than it really should have with the level of exertion and he was having to force himself into the measured breathing pattern that would allow him to keep going.

TJ radioed in a couple more times, the compartment was still losing heat, the temperature dropping and without him asking, Scott raised the pace.

"How long till we make it?" He asked Eli.

"I'm thinking another twenty minutes guys, the elevators down there are all out, you'll have to bypass them and use the emergency stairwells."

Damn. Young shared a look with Scott, determination mixed with anxiety on the young man's face.

"Come on."

 

TJ could feel herself shivering still, although she wasn't sure she could feel her fingers anymore. Her breath was now misting thickly in the air in front of her nose. She tried to stop the shivers but couldn't and that wasn't a good sign. Rush, in front of her didn't seem to be shivering consistently anymore and that wasn't good either. She pulled him closer to her with difficulty as her clumsy fingers snagged in his shirt, and it wasn't a good sign that he didn't complain. Of all of them he was the oldest, thinnest and least healthy. Barnes was snugged up tightly behind his back and was definitely shivering but had stopped talking.

She heard footsteps and when she looked up, Greer was back, the other flashlight blinding her for a second as he struggled with a massive armful of fabric.

"I got blankets" he said and started to heap bedclothes around them. "There's some quarters back there, but I reckon we wanted to be near the exit here. It feels quite a lot colder back there an' all an' that's saying something."

"Get in." she said. "We need your heat. Doctor Rush is not good."

"Too damn right." Muttered Barnes.

Greer slid into the mass of blankets.

"I hope they get us out of here soon." He said. "This mission has most definitely ceased to be fun."

She heard Barnes laugh. Their body heat started to warm up the nest. Greer started Barnes on a conversation about cars of all things and TJ was reassured when he kept her talking and alert. It took her a moment though to realise Rush, who she'd almost completely buried in the blankets, was shivering again and muttering.

He seemed to think she was someone else and kept complaining about an octopus, and she guessed it must be something from when he was a kid. Her mind was ticking over hypothermia and if that wasn't a sign of impaired consciousness she didn't know what was. She pulled his shivering form closer to her again.

"No," he muttered into her hair, "you're just lonely. You keep your hands to yourself."

She rubbed his back with her free hand.

"Should never have let you in. Now you keep coming back…or I do..."

He kept talking, but his speech slurred off into incoherence.

"Doctor Rush." She said into his ear.

"Don't want to leave." He said distinctly. "Warm with you."

"I know." She said. "It's fine, you can stay."

"You never did work it out…did you?" he muttered. "'S all about not being on your own."

TJ couldn't work out who he thought he was talking to. This seemed to be an adult conversation. Maybe his wife, or Amanda Perry?

"Doctor Rush?"

"Last place you were warm and safe."

"Doctor Rush, it's TJ."

She felt Barnes shift behind Rush and Greer's arm slid past Barnes to feel across Rush's back and clasp TJ's wrist.

"What's he saying?" Greer asked.

"He doesn't seem to know where he is." She said. "He should start to wake up in a bit once we warm up."

For the moment at least, she thought. Not forever. She laid there listening to Barnes and Greer arguing listlessly about NASCAR. Rush had stopped muttering and was shivering as hard as she had been.

"Doctor Rush?" She tried again.

"TJ?"

"Yeah."

"Did I pass out?"

"Pretty much."

"Bloody freezing here. Shouldn' be this cold this quick."

"Greer says it gets significantly colder down the corridor."

He was silent.

"I'm assuming that's not good either?"

"No." TJ could hear Rush's teeth chattering. "It's means there's possibly….probably…good chance the coolant fluid has a slow leak into this area."

"So it's going to get colder in here?"

"Much colder."

"How fast?"

"Can't tell. Can't see how big leak is…how long have we been here."

TJ fumbled her watch up and was shocked to see it had only been half an hour since last time she checked. That really wasn't good. It felt like much much longer, meaning her brain was playing tricks.

"I think…maybe…two hours?" She said.

He was silent again.

"So that's bad too."

"Very bad…." his teeth chattered, "…Lieutenant."

TJ heard a mumbled ‘great' from Greer. She fumbled her radio up through the blankets with unsteady hands.

"Colonel Young? Eli?"

"Yeah TJ?" It was Eli.

"It must've gone below freezing in here and Doctor Rush thinks there's a coolant leak in here. It's getting colder in here…did I say that already…it's getting colder in here a lot quicker than it ought to."

"Coolant!?" Eli's voice was a strangled squawk. "Christ!"

"Sitrep TJ." Young's voice was breathy as if he was running.

"It's got to be below zero in here…sir…and getting colder. We're wrapped up in blankets together near the exit and Doctor Rush is conscious again…"

"He was unconscious?"

"Yeah…I think we're pretty screwed unless you can get us out."

"Comforting." Muttered Rush.

"'ll be fine." There was the slightest hint of a slur to Greer's voice.

"We're in a pretty bad way sir."

"We're almost there." Young's voice was even more laboured.

 

With TJ's radio-in, the whole party had sped up. Young's knee was killing him, but he was keeping up with Scott and Chloe and Dunning was right behind him. They ran into darkness, Scott slowing momentarily to click on the flashlight..

"You're almost there guys." Eli's voice was welcome. "Left at the next junction, the first right."

Thirty seconds later they were standing at a sealed bulkhead door, all panting hard. The air was slightly chill here and the bulkhead door was cold to the touch, too cold.

"Okay Eli, now what?" Scott asked.

"You're going to have to force the door and we're going to sacrifice an area of corridor as I'm pretty certain we won't be able to close it. It'll have a security lock on it, but Chloe should be able to override the lock with the power from the battery Volker gave her and my instructions. Then you force the door with the crowbars."

Young stood back leaning on the cold wall as Eli and Volker started giving Chloe instructions which she appeared to understand. She cracked open the door control and started fiddling with the contents, stopping occasionally to rub chilled hands together. The light flashed orange. And then again. And a third time. Young realised his hands were clenching into fists and releasing over and over.

"It's not working Eli." She said in frustration, rubbing her hands on her pants to warm them. A bunch more instructions came through, then she spoke again. "Look, let me try something."

She started fiddling with the controls again, breaking further into the panel before they finally flashed green.

"Done." She said.

"What did you do Chloe?" Eli demanded.

"I'll tell you later." She stepped back looking at Young, Dunning and Scott. "I'm done."

Young didn't wait, just stepped forward and started forcing the crowbar into the seam at the edge of the door, Dunning grabbed the crowbar, his hands above and below Young's and they pushed and jiggled it back and forwards. It seemed to take ages to ever get it a millimetre into the seal. Scott moved in below him, grabbing the other crowbar, crouching and starting to work at the seal lower, Chloe adding her strength to his.

"This isn't working." Scott's voice was taut with anxiety.

"Keep going!" Young snapped. "We're not leaving them in there."

They continued to struggle with the door, forcing the crowbars in another millimetre or two.

There was a clattering of feet on the decking behind him and he turned to see Brody, Varro, Cole and Becker.

"Step…out of the…way." Brody was breathing so hard he could barely talk.

Varro hauled Scott and Dunning bodily away from the door, then shouldered Young out and Brody was putting something on the door. With a wrenching grinding noise the door began to open and Young realised suddenly it was the device the Lucian Alliance had used on the opening mechanism of the gate room to break out.

As soon as there was enough of a crack, Young was grabbing at the door and he Varro and Scott managed to force it open enough to force their way through the gap. The cold hit him, it was like walking into a freezer and there was a slight chemical smell. Chloe was holding the flashlight at the top of the doorway, illuminating the room. Young paused a moment, his breath a cold mist in the air. Through the icy haze Young made out a pile of blankets in the corner opposite. He gave a shout, with no idea what he had actually yelled and ran over ignoring the pain shooting through his knee.

"We got them." Scott said into his radio.

He grabbed the nearest body and dragged it up and out of the room, only realising it was Greer when he was passing him out to Dunning in the corridor. Scott and Varro brought out two more, and he went back in for the last, realising by the weight or lack thereof, it must be Rush.

As he half carried, half dragged him out, Brody and Varro were trying the Lucian gadget again. His knees gave out and he collapsed on the corridor floor watching over Rush's head as the door slowly ground closed. Brody collapsed opposite him.

"Sir?" Cole was talking to him and he realised he had collapsed with Rush in his arms against his chest, Cole was trying to take Rush. His arms tensed for a moment, then he let her help him struggle to his feet, bringing Rush up with him. Becker was pulling blankets off the kino sled taking protein powder cans out of them, and another sled was behind.

"Get him up here." Said Cole.

Rush was a dead weight, but he helped Cole manoeuvre him onto the sled. He jumped as his hand touched the metal can. It was hot.

"Cans full of boiling water, sir." She said. "Well, hot by now. We wrapped the cans in blankets to keep them hot."

She was wrapping Rush in the hot blanket, and settling him against TJ on the sled, then piling blankets over the two, creating a warm nest with both them and the cans inside. She took a look at Brody who had pretty much collapsed with his head on his knees, and gestured to him and Young watched Varro haul Brody up and sit him on the end of the second sled with Greer and Barnes.

They started off for home hauling the sleds by straps tied to the front. Young was limping hard and Cole paused the party after only a couple of minutes to order him onto the sled with Rush and TJ, pushing him down to sit on the rear. The sled was crowded and he ended up sitting at an angle with Rush's head practically in his lap, but he was able to stretch his leg out almost straight and take the pressure off his knee.

The journey seemed to take forever, but he felt TJ start to move before they had returned to the inhabited area. He squeezed TJ's shoulder and she mumbled something.

"It'll be okay." He said.

He had one hand on her shoulder to hold himself on the sled and the other in Rush's hair, stroking reflexively over his scalp. He felt so cold. He leaned a little, trying to see ahead to see the other sled but couldn't see if Greer and Barnes were moving. Young's mind felt frozen too, praying they had got there in time. He turned back and just sat there, holding on and stroking their hair as they made their way through the corridors and he began to allow himself hope they would be okay.

In the infirmary there were more containers full of hot water waiting, and Camile, James and Calvos. Young struggled up from the sled, pain shooting through his knee and he grabbed for a gurney. Cole was rapping out orders to get the four frozen people up from the sleds. She saw him swaying.

"Lieutenant James, get the Colonel on that bed!"

He frowned, but James and Calvos picked him up bodily and set him on the bed next to Rush.

"Wait there!" Cole instructed. "I'll get to you."

He watched as Cole took temperatures and the four were packed in blankets with containers of hot water to warm them. TJ and Greer were already coming round and as soon as they were alert enough were being fed hot tea.

He only realised Chloe had gone when she walked back in and wasn't Chloe.

"I'm Doctor Macarthur." She said, a little uncertainly, looking back to Dunning who had led her in.

Cole was immediately with her.

"We have four patients suffering from hypothermia."

Young's energy was flagging, he wasn't able to follow the conversation and his knee was throbbing with a rhythmic intensity that was making it even harder to concentrate.

Cole walked over. He let Cole help him out of his boots and pants and look at his leg. There was a nasty fist sized bruise already beginning to bloom on the side of his knee and she started to strap his knee up with tape. She went and came back with a cup of green coloured tea.

"Drink this." She said. "It'll help with the pain."

He drank the tea. It was disgusting, but the pain began to recede, although the room became fuzzy and it was a little harder to concentrate. He could see Brody was sitting on his other side, collapsed back against the pillows, and Scott was sat on the end of the bed, leaning forward on his knees.

"Scott." He said. "I'm pretty certain this tea is going to knock me out. You're in charge. Let Camile take the bridge after you."

He slumped back against the pillows and the drugs took him under.

 

He dreamed of the sound of the sea and an all pervading cold that sank into his bones and made his joints ache. There was a warmth there if he could only get to it, but he was frozen, unable to move. He woke with a start, disoriented, expecting to see the ceiling of a cave, but seeing only grey metal. Someone had pulled a blanket over him, but it was half off the edge of the gurney and he pulled it back over him, looking left and right. Brody was asleep on the bed still, and on his other side, Rush was still wrapped up tightly in blankets which had the bulky look that suggested there were still hot water cans under there.

Cole had obviously heard him shifting as she walked over from where she was sitting writing at TJ's desk to his bed. It must still be early, he realised, as the dimmer night lighting was on.

"How are they?" he asked quietly.

"I think they're going to be fine." She said. "More importantly, Doctor Macarthur thinks they're going to be fine. I hope you don't mind, but I sent Chloe for one of the Homeworld Command doctors as soon as we got back."

She looked quite nervous.

"You were the medical officer on duty." Young said. "It was your call, a good one."

It was a bit fuzzy on that front as Cole wasn't officially a medic yet, but it was good enough for Young. She smiled at him gratefully, as Doctor Macarthur walked round from behind a screen.

"Hi." Young said. "How are they?"

"Fine, or they will be. They're all asleep right now, but they've all been conscious," her eyes flickered down to the name embroidered on his shirt, "Colonel. Sorry, we haven't been introduced, I'm Doctor Macarthur. This is all a bit new to me."

"First time on Destiny." He said.

"First time in someone else's body, first time off world."

Young smiled at her.

"You get used to it."

"Okay," she said. "I hope so. Well, Airman Cole and her team did mostly the right thing warming them up after you got them out. I'm pretty confident you've avoided any major frostbite and so now, considering your facilities," she looked around a little helplessly, "it's just a matter of wait and see. I'm most concerned about Doctor Rush, his hypothermia and frostbite was the most severe, and his heartbeat was a little irregular. The others responded well to being warmed up, he's been lucky that the warming process worked so well for him. Considering the severity of his condition, it could have gone very wrong, warming him up so quickly, it can cause an arrhythmia..." she looked at Young's slightly blank expression, "…it could have been bad for his heart, it was risky, especially for him. He's also significantly underweight and I'm recommending he goes on a diet to increase that."

Young laughed.

"Good luck with that." He said.

She gave him a long look then shrugged.

"You're all underweight." She said. "But his is problematic. I also kept Mister Brody in all night to keep an eye on him. He's just exhausted himself. He's also somewhat too underweight and could do with eating a bit more." She shrugged.

"When can I get out?" He asked her.

"Now if you want, but you'll have to keep off that knee as much as possible and use a cane until it's healed."

"Have you had the grand tour yet?" Young asked her.

Macarthur looked nervous.

"I don't really have clearance." She said. "I didn't know about this project, but I was the only doctor on site with any significant recent experience with hypothermia, I've been in Antarctica. I've only recently found out about the programme at all."

"Well," said Young, "once you know about the whole ‘people accidentally stuck on a several million year old spaceship across the other side of the universe' thing the rest is pretty much a moot point. Cole, make sure someone takes Doctor Macarthur to get breakfast and at least to the observation lounge."

Cole grinned.

"I'll take Doctor Macarthur when Varro comes to take over." She said.

She and Macarthur disappeared back to the desk, Young could hear then talking quietly, the occasional laugh coming through.

He slid down off the bed, carefully onto his good foot. The air in the infirmary was chilly against his bare legs and the tape around his knee was pulling at his leg hair uncomfortably but he grabbed his pants and with extreme care, pulled them on over the injured knee, wincing. He gritted his teeth and limped over to TJ. She was sound asleep but looked peaceful and relaxed. Someone had taken all the pins out of her hair and they were in a heap on the side table. Her hair was fanned across the pillow. She wouldn't be happy about that, her hair would be a tangled mess when she woke, like it always was if it wasn't plaited. He stroked her hair gently then turned.

Rush was asleep on his bed, lying on his back. Both his hands were bandaged and lay on the covers on his chest. It looked like a distinctly unnatural position for him. He was shifting restlessly and his hair was across his face. With a quick uneasy look around Young reached out and pushed the hair off Rush's face.

Rush's eyes flicked open and Young yanked his hand away. Rush's eyes were doing the slow sleepy blink that usually slid into either beady suspicious brightness or a glare, but this time the exhausted blink didn't change.

"Hi." Young said.

"Hi." Rush replied.

His voice was quiet and his eyes dark shadowed.

"How are you?"

"I feel like shit, and they've put me in mittens."

Young raised his eyebrows. Rush lifted a hand and looked at the bandages.

"I have frostbite." He said sourly. "Both hands."

"Painful."

"Not at the moment." His eyes flicked slowly to an empty beaker on the table, before floating back across to Young. "Apparently it's not too bad considering. Should heal up." He looked at the bandages then up at Young again. "I've been spoon-fed." He said in disgust.

Young grinned at him, then winced as his weight shifted on his bad knee. He hauled himself up to sit on the edge of Rush's bed.

"Doctor Macarthur has instructed me to ensure you're given extra rations till you put a bit of extra weight on. Brody too."

Rush shot a glare in the direction of the desk.

"As if anyone would want to eat additional rations of what's served up here."

Young laughed, a little louder than he'd intended, and Doctor Macarthur put her head round the screen.

"You're awake again?"

"Evidently." Rush's voice was flat.

She came over, standing on the other side of the bed, and started asking him questions in a cheerful voice. Young went to slide off the bed, but Rush caught his eye past the woman's shoulder and he stopped. He watched as Doctor Macarthur sat Rush up and lifted his shirts to listen to his heart. Young realised he'd not actually seen Rush without his shirt on, but Rush looked as thin as he always felt to Young, ribs visible all the way up to his collarbones. She pulled his shirt back down, Rush's bandage mittened hands not up to the task and moved down to examine his feet.

"Your feet look fine." She said happily. "Those knitted socks appear to have done a good job."

Rush looked up at Young with a savage expression and mouthed.

"Get me out of here."

Young shook his head.

"Not a chance." He mouthed back.

Doctor Macarthur finished with his feet and finally left them to it.

"I thought I told you not to get into any trouble." Young told Rush with a grimace, he looked at him a little uncertainly for a moment then contented himself with putting his hand on the other man's shoulder and squeezing.

"Bugger off." Rush said quietly, as Young pulled the covers up where they'd been pushed down by Doctor Macarthur's examination. But it didn't sound like Rush's heart was in the declaration.


	10. Infirmary

Young looked down at Rush whose eyes were drooping. "I'll let you get some sleep." He said, shifting his weight.

Rush lifted a mittened hand and rested it on Young's arm, stopping him with a touch. "Cole said you pulled me out."

"I led the team down there." Young said.

"She said you ran your knee into the ground again getting down there."

"It'll be fine, I just need to rest it for a few days meaning, I use the cane again for a few days."

"Your rifle."

Young nodded. "Yeah, but it's the right height, and it's got a grip on the end." He ducked his head away, then looked back, with a grin. "Anyhow, it's also the only support available. You oughta be grateful it's not your feet that are frostbitten, At least you'll be walking out of here."

Rush gave a tired nod and a slight smile. "Small mercies. When they finally let me go."

"Rush, no one is gonna put up with your bitching any longer than they have to."

Rush looked like he was going to retort but his reply was swallowed by a yawn. 

Young squeezed his shoulder again. "Get some more sleep." Young advised him. "I'm going to my quarters to do the same." He shifted himself carefully off the bed, trying and failing to stifle the sharp inhalation as he put his bad leg down.

"You can't walk anywhere." Rush said in an exhausted voice. "Get back in the bed over there or I'll call that damn doctor over again."

Young turned and looked at Rush, who was blinking as if he was trying to keep his eyes open.

"Don't think I won't grass you up to that doctor." Rush muttered.

Young considered the statement, then shrugged and limped back to the bed and hauled himself in, pulling the blankets up. There was a cup of weak cold green tea by the bed, he sighed and drank it down before rolling on his side and trying to settle. Across from him Rush had his eyes closed, Young closed his eyes and it didn't take long for the tea to kick in, pain to begin to ebb and sleep to arrive.

 

He woke to voices. It must be late still as the lights were still dimmed to night time levels. Looking across, Brody was standing by Rush's bed and they were talking in low voices. Rush noticed Young looking over and Brody followed his gaze.

"Morning." Young said.

"Morning."

"Hi." Brody added. "How are you doing?"

"I'll be okay, my knee's gonna need a bit of a rest."

Brody nodded. "Well, I'll be going." He said. "Doctor said I only needed to rest. She only kept me here ‘cause Cole said the science team can't be trusted to rest. I can go now if I promise to sleep."

Young laughed.

"She said the same about you." Brody added with a grin. "Anyway, I've got work to do."

He walked out, leaving Young smiling resignedly. He looked at Rush who was still leaning back against the pillows.

"Are you going to stay off that knee today?" Rush asked him.

"Unlikely." Young said. "I'm due on the bridge at eight. You on the other hand, are on medical rest."

Rush scowled.

Young slid carefully off the bed and looked around. No rifle. Young found his radio and had Baras bring his rifle-crutch down to the infirmary. Macarthur, with a doctor's ear for movement, returned to quietly re-examine his knee. Rush watched with amusement as Young endured her poking at it and strapping it up again with instructions to keep off it as much as possible.

He sat back on the bed as Macarthur took a look at Rush's hands and ears. They both looked painful, blisters coming up over his fingers. Young watched Rush trying not to wince with pain as she rewrapped the bandages, wrapping his fingers in non-stick gauze and mittening him in some fuzzy looking stuff with more bandages. She gave Rush another beaker of TJ's weird green tea for the pain, holding it up for him to drink. Rush shot Young a glare over the rim of the cup which Young interpreted as embarrassment.

The medication seemed to work fast. Though he quickly became unfocused Rush kept his eyes on Young until he fell asleep. It felt a little uncomfortable being stared at and Young had the nagging feeling he was missing something.

Baras arrived with the rifle and Young limped over to the table where Doctor Macarthur was sitting. She looked up from TJ's laptop, as he lowered himself onto a spare stool.

"How's it going?" He asked her.

She smiled. "Well, I've only got four patients and three will be ready to be released when they wake up. I only kept Mr Brody in so he could get some sleep. Scientists, you know what they're like."

Her smile was tempered with resignation and somehow inappropriate on Chloe's face and Young had the impression that Doctor Macarthur was significantly older than Chloe.

He smiled and nodded. "So, if the other three are fine, how will he be?"

"I think he'll be fine given time. He'll need to stay here for a few days and protect his hands, but it looks like he's avoided the worst."

"Doctor..." Young started.

"Susannah." She said with a grin. "I'm a civilian so I get to have a first name."

He smiled back. "Everett." he said. "Will you be staying?"

"I need to go back and check in, but I think it would be best if I came here in the daytimes for a few days if Chloe is happy to spend her days at Homeworld Command. Or someone else would volunteer." She looked down at the laptop in front of her then around at the room. "This is very interesting, fascinating even."

"What are you reading?" he asked.

The stream of words that came out of her mouth were pretty much gibberish to Young.

"TJ asked me to look at the data and the method she has been using to prevent rejection in Doctor Volker's kidney while I'm here." Susannah explained. "Not my specialism, but I can do some more research for her on Earth, speak to some colleagues." Her eyes flicked back down to the laptop and up again. "This data is remarkable. I've been reading for most of the night."

Young smiled back, the woman's enthusiasm was infectious.

"Make sure you get some breakfast, it's not great but it's better than it used to be."

"I'm promised by Becker its savoury rutabanana wraps this morning." She said. "I have absolutely no idea what that is, but it sounds worth a try.

"It's more edible than some mornings." Young said, remembering the white stuff from the plains planet. "Probably last night's leftovers fried up with flatbread." He said. "Well, I'll leave you to it."

 

Young limped awkwardly up to the bridge, taking a while to get used to using the rifle to support himself again. Camile was sitting in the chair with Ramirez and Calvos at the consoles. He wasn't sure if Ramirez knew what he was doing, he hadn't been trained to stand a bridge watch yet. Calvos however had arrived during the Lucian Alliance attack already half trained in Ancient technology. As Young came round the corner he realised that Volker was in a chair wrapped in a blanket.

Camile looked at him taking in the limp and the rifle.

"How's it going?" he asked her.

"Very quiet." She replied. "Still in FTL. Still no sign of coming out." She sat forward in the chair. "How are you Everett?"

"Fine." He said. "I pushed my knee a bit too far but it'll heal if I take it easy."

"Yeah." She said smiling. "I wasn't expecting you up at quarter to six in the morning. You want to sit down?"

She moved as if to stand up but he shook his head.

"I'm just checking in. Restless I guess." He nodded at Volker. "He okay?"

Camile smiled. "Volker said he'd stay in case we needed someone, but he's just spent most of the shift asleep. He and Eli spent hours trying to work out what went wrong." She sighed. "They didn't figure it out. How are the others?"

"Doctor Macarthur says TJ, Greer and Barnes can go today, Rush has frostbite, and she's keeping him in there for a few days. Brody she only wanted to keep in overnight to make sure he rested." He shifted his weight a little. "He and Varro pretty much saved them you know, with that Lucian Alliance door device."

Camile looked a little surprised.

"They didn't say."

Young realised how much he liked Brody, a decent guy, no whining, and got things done. He was even beginning to appreciate Varro.

"Well it worked." He said. He gave a sideways nod at Ramirez. "I didn't realise Ramirez was trained for bridge duty."

"Not really, but he's actually bothered to learn some Ancient and can get by without a lot of hand holding." Admitted Camile, "We're a little short of qualified crew considering how many bridge crew are out of commission. Everyone else was pretty much dead on their feet"

Young raised his voice. "Ramirez."

Ramirez looked up.

"You're on the next training roster for bridge crew."

"Thank you sir." Ramirez grinned at him.

Young turned back to Camile. "Are you okay here for another couple of hours?"

She nodded. "As I said, no changes, no alerts. We'll be fine"

"That's what I like to hear. I'll take over at eight hundred hours." He said. "I'm going to have to consider changing the shifts, with Rush out of commission for the next couple of days and only three of us available."

She nodded. "We can manage, but we could always try Brody and James for the quiet night shifts as we're still in FTL. It's unlikely they'll have any issues they can't wake us up for."

Young considered the options. "Possibly." He mused. "With experienced crew support, I'll consider it."

Young left Camile and made his painful way to the mess hall.

 

Despite being seated for most of his bridge shift, sitting in the chair still put strain on his knee and it was aching ferociously, and he suspected it had swollen up again. By the time he made it up to the infirmary after dinner for the meeting he had scheduled, his arm and hand were painful too. Despite being the correct height for him, he'd forgotten how much the rifle weighed. Gripping the stock and lifting it constantly left his arm tired and his hand aching and he'd join Rush with a collection of blisters as well as muscle strain by tomorrow if he wasn't careful

Camile, Scott, TJ, Brody and Eli were already there, waiting for him. Lieutenant James was getting her first experience in the centre bridge chair supported by Volker and Greer. Young reflected how odd it was that they'd never known it existed for a year or more and just left Destiny to do her own thing. Now they knew it was there, they couldn't leave it alone.

Dr Macarthur had declined to let Rush out of the infirmary, even for a meeting. Therefore the meeting was being held around Rush's bed since she had confined him to bed rest. She claimed she had learned the hard way that "scientists were never to be trusted with their own health", and given any opportunity would conveniently forget to adhere to doctor's orders. Young was impressed that Susannah had figured this out so quickly after joining the Homeworld Command. The best way to work around scientists ego's was to ignore them.

Rush was evidently not a happy camper. As soon as Young walked through the door he was fixed with a solid granite glare. He, or someone, had removed the bandages over his ears. They were on the table next to him. Young grinned at Rush, receiving a scowl in return.

"Sorry people." He said apologetically, limping towards the beds. "Are we ready?"

"Sit down Everett." Camile said. "That looks painful."

TJ stepped forward taking his arm, firmly steering him towards where Scott sat on a bed near Rush. Scott started to slide down off the bed but as Young drew level with Rush, Rush pulled his feet up, tenting his knees under his blankets, silently making space for him. With a slightly amused look, Young propped the gun up and with help from TJ and Brody pulled himself up on the end of Rush's bed. As TJ shoved a stool under his foot, the relief to his knee was palpable, and he blew out a long breath.

"Okay," Young started when he was settled, "this is a planning session. Tell me about the big kitchen." He looked at Brody.

Brody seemed a little startled to be spoken to first. "Uh, it's got plates, knives, spoons and stuff. We…uh…think most of the equipment isn't transferable, but we can resupply Becker with pots and stuff for the mess, maybe shift some of the smaller pieces of equipment."

Young nodded  "Fine, we'll send a party with kino sleds." He said. "What else?"

Brody shifted a little as everyone watched him, but seemed to gather his thoughts. "Well, now the route seems secure we can branch out from it, I guess. I'd like to take a look at a couple of the rooms we didn't have a chance to investigate properly. There's some possible storage a bit further on. We did take a quick look at the corridors in that direction and it looked fairly intact."

Young leaned forward, nodded. "What are you expecting to find in the storage?" he asked.

"I don't know about expecting." Brody replied with a sigh. "But there's got to be some spare parts stored aboard Destiny somewhere. And realistically, we aren't going to be able to fix the dome unless we find some of that clear molecular sheeting material to replace what blew out in the star."

 

Young nodded thoughtfully, trying to recall the area on the map. In his peripheral vision Young could see Rush nodding as well. He turned to look at Rush. "Anything to add?"

 "There are two large areas further along Mr Brody's path." Rush said. "Warehouse sized rooms. We could find something useful there. I think Brody's right about the spares, but I think that should be a short, focussed, trip. We need to fix the coolant leaks we encountered further forward."

Young furrowed his brow. "Why?"

He received a look from Rush that seemed to suggest Rush thought he was only compounding his current levels of stupidity with foolish questions, but he pressed on anyway.

"No, why? Seriously Rush, we've just had five of you in the infirmary all night, give me a reason."

It was Eli who interrupted. "It's a big drain on Destiny's systems." He said. "A lot of the damage, stuff like the hull breaches and coolant leak means Destiny's using extra power to keep the air in and stuff." His hands sketched squashing something together. "If we fix the coolant leak, Destiny won't need to use so much power to keep whatever she's keeping cool, cool as well."

Rush used his elbows to push himself up to sitting from where he'd been propped up on the pillows, his feet pressing against Young's hip as he came up. "We don't have much choice about dealing with the damage," Rush said sharply, "it's a significant power drain and it's only going to get worse as the problem spreads."

Young sat up straighter. "What's down there that's being cooled?"

Eli's face was animated. "More computers." He said excitedly. "Like totally half as big as what's online now." His fingers were twitching as if he already had a console.

Rush gave Eli a look of condescension. "There's a whole separate computer core down there that isn't currently online." He said.

Camile cocked her head to one side slightly as she spoke. "But won't bringing it online just use more power?"

Young was grateful Camile had asked the question, not him. He was fed up of getting it in the neck for asking questions he could never have been expected to know the answer to. He could feel Rush's toes clenching and releasing against his hip, but it seemed to be an unconscious gesture as his entire attention was focussed on Camile. Young shifted slightly, adjusting the angle of his knee.

 "Not if we fix the coolant issues first." Eli said. Rush gave a sharp nod.

Young sighed. "What would we need to fix it?" He asked.

"I'd suggest we deal with the main leak using the suits." Rush said. "It should prevent any repeat of yesterday's incident."

Rush's bandaged hands shifted restlessly on his tented up knees and his feet flexed against Young. Young shifted on the bed. That really was very distracting. "The suits are being used on the dome." He said. "Food has to be our first priority."

"Yes," Rush said acidly, "but as Mister Brody just said, that project is pretty much stalled until we can find or make spare parts to fix the blown out area of dome."

Eli was shifting from foot to foot  "Why do the hydroponics have to be in the dome?" He asked looking around the group. "I mean, that's just for show isn't it? It makes it feel like a greenhouse. But we don't actually get any useful light from the dome or anything," he waved a hand vaguely from side to side, "it's just a big high ceiling. If one of those big warehouse areas is empty couldn't we set up the hydroponics garden in there? I mean, it'd be a big job, but then when we fix the dome we've got two hydroponics gardens..."

He tailed off, realising they were all staring at him.

"Bloody good idea." Rush said with a satisfied expression. "Finally something sensible! There's your hydroponics garden project Colonel, in a project considerably more likely to achieve a result."

His voice was mocking. Young decided he really wanted to slap him. Not hard, just for being so bloody irritating. Young turned and looked at Rush steadily, lips pressed together, head tilted back slightly. Rush just stared back.

"We'll have to find someway of providing soil." TJ said.

"We would have anyway, being as the last garden was cooked to vapour in a star." Snapped Rush.

"Can't we compost waste?" Scott asked. "What does Destiny do with our...uh...waste? I mean, someone said when we were running out of water the liquid is…filtered out."

Camile pulled a faintly disgusted face.

 "Good question." Young said.

"Look," Rush cut in sharply, "this is detail on a project I'm certain Dr Park and her horde of green fingered helpers will be much better placed to answer. I thought we were meant to be planning?"

Young shot him a glance, and Rush stared back a little confrontationally. Young raised an eyebrow. "Fine," he said, "Dr Park can convene a working team to establish how to resolve the soil problems. Brody can arrange another trip to explore the area around the kitchen. Time permitting, his team can try to access the purported warehouse areas, and estimate capacity for Dr Park's team. If it looks feasible, then we can think about relocating hydroponics to this new area."

He looked around the group, there were no dissenting voices and nods.

"Now," Rush said, "can we please get on to the coolant leak."

"Do we even know how long this leak has been on-going? Why is it so important that we fix it now?" Young asked him pointedly.

"Have you not been listening to anything Eli and I have been saying?" Rush said in exasperation. "Firstly, it is draining significant amounts of power from Destiny. Destiny expends power to heat the ship for us. Despite the hull and the shields, there is a constant heat drain into space. If you add a large area of subzero fluid, which she is also chilling for other reasons somewhere else, it means Destiny is wasting a significant amount of power chilling fluid only to reheat it somewhere else."

Young nodded. That actually made sense.

"Additionally, it appears as if the leaks are getting worse. The situation will only deteriorate faster if we don't address them soon. Quite possibly, the second computer core is what is being chilled in the first place. Considering the contents of the database we have access to at the moment, don't you think we might actually _want_ any information that's available on there?" Rush looked at him, waiting for a response.

"Okay." Young said. "Eli, Brody and Scott can go in using the suits to assess the problem."

"I should..." Rush started.

"Not a chance." Young cut him off. "Doctor Macarthur is clear you're off duty for a few days. If the leaks are as much of an issue as you say, I'm not waiting. You can support via kino."

Rush scowled at him and Young could feel his feet pressing into Young's hip as his legs tensed in irritation.

"You can't take any risks with the cold at the moment." TJ added firmly. "Dr Macarthur was very clear, and I agree with her, no damage to your hands, not even a knock for the next few days, and no going in the cold for a few months."

Young knew TJ, knew the piece of information was for him and probably Brody to hear. Rush needed the voice of reason, sometimes pounded into his head with a mallet.

Rush took a deep breath in, held it with an angry expression, then let it out. "Fine." He said coldly.

 "Okay." Young said. "I think we're done for the moment then."

People shifted, sliding off the beds, wandering away. Young waited until they had all left, although Camile gave him a strange look as she went. He put his hand down on the bed, avoiding Rush's feet to turn himself towards the man. He winced as it pulled at his knee.

"Put your leg up on the bed." Rush said sourly.

Young hauled his leg up carefully, straightening his knee with some pain to lay along the side of Rush's leg. He looked at Rush. Rush had lifted his hands off the blankets as Young moved and couldn't quite suppress a slight wince of pain as he put them down again. The man looked tired, really tired, dark circles under his eyes. Worse than usual. His nose was also reddened at the end.

"How are you feeling?" he asked him.

"Fine." Rush replied.

Blatantly a lie. Young shifted a little to settle his leg, trying not to drag at the blankets. "I heard what TJ said about your hands." He said. Rush shot him an irritated look "How bad are they?"

"I'm padded so I can't knock them and smash the skin up." He said. "She's worried about my ears as well." He pushed back his hair with a mittened hand and Young could see the tips of his ears were still reddened and painful looking as well. "Apparently I have poor circulation and was playing with cold consoles, which is why I'm like this and the others aren't."

"Will it all heal up?"

Rush shrugged. "She doesn't think she'll have to cut anything off me."

Young gave him a slightly disbelieving look.

"Apparently if it dies and doesn't just scab off you get surgery to cut away the dead tissue." He said. "She doesn't think that'll be necessary."

"How long are you in bandages?" Young asked.

Rush scowled. "Just until I can get the woman to get them off." He growled.

Young smiled at him in amusement.

Rush glared. "A few days." He clarified with a sigh.

"Will there be any long term effects?"

"Pain apparently." Rush said sarcastically. "Pain, numbness if I'm unlucky. But she says it looks like I've avoided the worst."

"Small mercies." Young said.

Rush looked at him. "Fuck off Young." He said, tiredly.

"I would have thought you would have wanted some company, being as you can't use a laptop."

Rush gave him a look. "And you're offering yourself?" he asked. "Very noble of you."

Young let his eyes float up to the ceiling in exasperation. "I'm off shift," he said, looking back at Rush, "and it's not like I'm gonna be walking around the ship doing anything. I could get someone to get your chess board."

Rush stared at him, and Young had the feeling that Rush was trying to work out Young's angle on this. Young wasn't sure of his angle himself, but sitting here playing chess with his leg up reasonably comfortably was better than lying in his quarters being bored or feeling like he ought to be doing something else.

"Fine." Said Rush. "You can't be any worse than Eli is at chess."

 

 

Young was better than Eli at chess. He actually beat Rush a few times. Not as many as Rush beat him, but there were several times it was close.

"Rook to king four."

Young leaned forward and moved Rush's piece for him.

"I underestimated you again." Rush told him with a speculative look.

"I said I played chess. You're gonna win again though, in about three moves."

"Two."

Young moved his bishop. Rush took it. Young put the piece on Rush's side of the board and stared at the board. "There's no way out." He said. "You've got checkmate next move whatever I do."

Rush shifted his hands again in an overly careful way that suggested they were giving him a lot of pain. Young moved his knight, then Rush's queen as directed.

"Checkmate." Rush said.

Young nodded ruefully.

"You've played a lot?" Rush asked him.

"I've spent a lot of time killing time off world and it's more interesting than checkers. I've played chess with a travel board, with rocks with the pieces drawn on in sharpie, with pieces drawn on little scraps of paper. Several of my old gate team were obsessed with it. It was learn or get left out."

"But you enjoy it." Rush's eyes were bird bright and penetrating.

"Yeah." Young admitted with a laugh. "I do."

He shifted his leg and the blanket moved under Rush's hand drawing a sharp inhalation from him. "You need some more of that green tea stuff." Young told him, glancing over at the beaker of now cold green tea the doctor had left.

"I need to not be doped up to the eyeballs." Rush said.

Young shrugged. "It's late, I'm gonna be hitting the sack soon anyway."

He thought Rush looked almost disappointed.

"Look, half a cup of the stuff won't knock you out too bad." Young said, unsure why exactly he was cajoling the man. He moved the chess board aside and slid carefully off the bed, taking a couple of halting and rather stiff steps to the table and taking the beaker.

"Bugger off."

Young grinned. "Seriously Rush, get a grip, drink the damn painkiller and get some sleep."

"Or what?"

"Or I'll set the doctor on you again." Young told him with amusement. "And she'll make you drink the whole cup."

Young could see Rush was tired and in pain. He leaned forward and held the beaker to his lips. "Drink the damn painkiller." He said gently.

He tilted it and was a little surprised, but Rush drank it, over half of it, before moving his head away.

"Do I get a lollipop?" Rush asked cynically.

"What?" Young didn't follow him for a moment, the phrase seeming completely out of context.

"Candy for taking my medicine. That stuff is foul."

Young laughed again. "You wish. But I'll let you beat me at chess again tomorrow if you want."

Rush shrugged. "If you want." He said noncommittally, lying back in the bed, but he didn't meet Young's eyes.

"I'll see you tomorrow." Young said.

 


	11. Mandatory medical attention

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Medical attention is mandatory

Once the pain from his hands began to subside, which took about three days, Rush began to actually realise that there would be some sort of long term effects from his injuries. The worst being the cold, which woke him shivering in the night. The second night he had to ask for another blanket and the bone deep cold didn't go away.

Doctor Macarthur had opted to continue to visit, returning day times. She and TJ arranged to run a series of medical assessments with on the crew, which meant a seemingly endless stream of crew entering and leaving the infirmary. Rush found the fact they could simply leave irritating, but the fact that a few stopped to talk to him, broke up the day a little.

Susannah was no longer in Chloe's body, was now exchanging with Camile who could productively use the time in Homeworld Command. It took a little while for Rush to adjust to the change, but it seemed to him that Camile's body suited her more. Chloe, when she finally came into the infirmary for her medical, also confided in him that she had reached her tolerance level for time spent with her mother, who whilst her drinking had decreased, was still very demanding and acting extremely over-protectively.

Rush wasn't sure whether he was pleased at the availability of an expert in what was wrong with him, or irritated with being fussed over. Susannah turned out to be reasonably interesting which was a boon, as there was little else he could do except talk. She had a reasonable knowledge of opera and classic literature at least and her ideas about statistical modelling of epidemics had produced some very interesting discussions. Rush had tweaked her curiosity when he directed her to the Ancient's data on the Ancient Plague in the database. He smirked, gratified and amused when he noticed her stealing any unoccupied moment to pore over the data which had been translated, rubbing a strand of Camile's hair between her fingers.

As he had promised, Young returned in the evenings to play chess. Rush was almost desperately grateful for his company by the end of day two but kept his face blank. Young on the other hand seemed to take a perverse delight in poking fun at his bandaged hands.

"You know." Young told him conversationally on the third day, as he set up the chess board again. "If putting you in mittens was all it takes to make you take a break I would have had TJ do it months ago."

Rush scowled at him.

"Nice to know you care." He snapped "If all it took for people to start taking a real interest in my general wellbeing was being almost frozen to death, I'd ha' been better advised to find some travelling companions with more concern for my personal wellbeing."

Young's eyes lifted slightly but remained shadowed under his brow, face still tilted towards the board so it was hard to read his expression. Young held Rush's gaze for a few moments and Rush thought he was going to reply, but finally Young looked back to the board. He carefully turned the board so Rush had control of the white pieces this time. "Your move." Young said tightly, not looking up.

Rush studied the board. He could hear TJ moving around the storage area, the rustling suggested she was checking the hanging bundles of herbs drying in loose fabric bags in front of the air vent. The silence stretched on slightly too long, the bed moving slightly as Young shifted his weight. Rush could see his body language had closed in on itself, shoulders tight and head angled downwards to the board rather than Rush.

"Pawn to king's three." Rush said, watching for a reaction.

Young moved the piece and finally sat back staring at the board, face impassive, his non-expression a blank wall. They went through a handful of moves, the only words spoken Rush's instructions to move pieces. Rush's eyes kept flicking up to Young's face.

Somehow his response had had some sort of effect, but Young's face was neutral, and he had no idea what the reaction was, just that there was one. It wasn't even a new conversation. They'd said the same things on previous occasions.

"Queen's rook to Rook four." Rush said.

It was a stupid move, one a beginner would make and he made it deliberately trying to get a response, but Young didn't gloat, didn't even smile, just took the piece and made his move.

The game continued, Rush trying to concentrate solely on the game, but again his eyes kept flicking to Young's face. He realised he was throwing the game, making moves simply to get a reaction. Maybe he should just give up, claim tiredness. Maybe he should say something.

He was staring down at the board, trying to work out his next move, how to salvage the game, when Young spoke, making him jump.

"So, Brody says that they're going back to the kitchen tomorrow."

The complete change of topic threw him totally. He looked up at Young, staring.

"I'm sending a larger party this time with kino sleds to retrieve any usable equipment." Young continued. "Becker is going to look at the objects there."

"Ah, yes…that'd make sense."

Young looked at him. "Are you alright, Rush?"

"Yes, I'm fine. Ah, well, it'd be a benefit if they could access the possible storage tomorrow as well."

"That was Brody's intention." Young said nodding. "They'll be taking a kino with them, and you'll be able to keep track of proceedings, give advice."

Rush looked down at his hands.

"I'm not sure I'll be much use with a kino remote." He said.

"If Susannah won‘t let you out for a break, I'll have someone here to be your hands."

Rush scowled, back on familiar ground.

"I'd really think that now I'm out of the danger zone so to speak, I could be allowed to sleep in my own quarters at least." He groused.

Young laughed.

"You'll have to ask her about that in the morning, but I'm pretty certain she doesn't trust you not to unwrap your hands and start doing stuff you shouldn't."

Rush huffed out a breath that was almost a laugh.

"I'm bored, not an idiot."

That elicited a grin from Young.

"Opinions may differ on that one." Young looked back down at the board. "Your move."

The atmosphere appeared to have unfrozen and Rush relaxed back into the game and the gentle banter.

 

Young was still in significant pain from his knee the next morning, but he took a walk down to the infirmary to find Rush and Susannah first thing, rifle-crutch thumping on the decking. They were talking by Rush's bed. Susannah looked up as he walked in, but continued talking to Rush whilst she was redressing his hands.

Young hadn't heard the first part of the conversation but it appeared Susannah was allowing Rush out of the infirmary to the bridge on the agreement that she got to come along as well, her attitude a mixture of resigned tolerance and genuine curiosity. Young silently agreed, she had already proved she had the ability to stay out of the way and in the background every time they had a meeting or played chess in the infirmary, and she'd be able to keep Rush in line. The thought made him grin, finding anyone capable of reining Rush in was a small miracle.

Susannah finished with Rush and turned to him. "Good, just the person I wanted to see." She told him, walking over to the desk where TJ was sitting. TJ grinned at him as Susannah reached down behind the desk.

"You need this." Susannah told him.

She handed him the cane. The body of it was a coppery tube, and looked like it had been cannibalised from part of Destiny's systems, the handle was something Young guessed was carved herbivore horn and the ferrule some sort of unidentifiable soft plasticky stuff.

TJ slipped out from behind the table and took his rifle. "I didn't expect you to be doing anything that silly." she said with a smile, "So it's taken us a little while to get this made."

Young heard a snort from Rush behind him.

"The height should be right," Susannah said, "it's made in direct comparison to your rifle and your height from your medical. It also weighs less that a third of the weight of your rifle."

Young leaned on the cane, it was the right height, and the handle considerably more comfortable than the rifle stock. He turned it over in his hands, it was beautifully made, he realised Rush was watching him holding it. He gave Rush a questioning look although there was no way that Rush had made it himself.

Rush ignored the unspoken query. "Makes you look like a proper cripple," Rush said, with amusement in his voice, faintly mocking.

"Rush." TJ's voice held a warning tone, with a flinty look in the glance she shot him.

"Don't you say anything to dissuade him from using it." Susannah chided.

"Well," Rush conceded, "it's a better look than the post apocalyptic walking wounded."

"You sound like Eli." TJ said. "He must be rubbing off on you."

Young could see mischief in her eyes, but Rush scowled. Young took a few tentative steps on the cane.

"Well, it's much better than the rifle." He said. "Anyway, I came down to let you know Brody's party have left, we'll be coordinating from the bridge. Eli and Volker are already up there, keeping an eye on things."

Rush was sliding off the edge of the bed in seconds, stamping his feet into his shoes and making for the door.

"Whoa, whoa!" Young limped over, leaning on his cane. "Wait for the rest of us."

The walk up to the bridge was almost funny, Rush almost childlike in his desire to get there walking ahead and then pausing to let the other's catch up as Susannah made sharp comments about pity for the injured or him leaving her old bones behind. Young had no idea how the woman got away with it, as pretty much anyone else would have been cursed at, but Susannah got snorts, sarcasm and resignation. TJ was carrying Young's rifle and handed it off to an airman for the armoury at the first opportunity. He was a little pleased that her relentless pursuit of medicine hadn't dulled her military training to not leave weapons unsecured.

Young had to admit the cane was considerably more comfortable and faster to walk on, if it did indeed, make him feel like a "proper cripple". It was only until it healed up though. He repeated this to himself, the voice sounding very much like TJ's in his head, take it easy now, and it'll heal up quicker.

Leaning on the rail by the command chair, Young watched Rush as they stood on the bridge. The barely concealed frustration had evaporated the moment they had arrived and he was wandering round consoles, staring at readouts. Susannah was following him in curiosity and it wasn't long before he had pressed her into being his hands, a task which she seemed more than happy to perform as long as he explained what he was doing. Sat at a console with him leaning over her shoulder she had dragged Camile's hair back off her face, twisted it into a tight knot and jammed a pen through it to hold it up. Strangely it looked very stereotypically oriental, but very unlike anything Camile normally did with her hair.

"Get back here." Rush snapped at Susannah, who had turned sideways away from the console so as not to stick Rush with the pen.

"You can wait just a second." She said, giving him a look that was both amused and derisive.

"I need you to bring up the sensor readings from the FTL engine, I need to check the power usages."

She laughed. "And exactly how am I meant to do that?" she snapped back.

Young smiled. Rush and Susannah seemed to have dropped into a reasonably easy acquaintance. Susannah was not easily cowed, argued back when he failed to explain what he wanted, demanded answers with an amused tolerance which appeared to work on him. Young wondered if there was something else about her which made him tolerate her more than other people, or if it was the fact that they were more contemporaries in age and background than Rush was with most people on this ship. Although Young thought Susannah might be older still than Rush, who was only a few years older than Young himself.

He realised that TJ had stayed on the bridge, a rare occurrence, but understandable in light of what had happened to TJ and the others on the last expedition and also the fact there were no patients in the infirmary. She was standing at the railing and had been watching him watching Rush. As he looked up at her she smiled at him and rolled her eyes, looking over at Rush and back at him. Young shrugged and gave her a half smile before turning back.

Scott was in the chair and caught his eye.

"You wanna sit?" Scott queried.

"No," Young said, "keep it. I'll be fine."

He heard a tutting from TJ behind him, but moved over to stand next to Rush and look over Susannah's shoulder where she was manipulating the kino feeds under Rush's direction, both feeds patched into the secondary console. The feed was following Brody's party as they travelled the same route as previously, quicker this time and pulling kino sleds. He shifted his weight to his good leg and leaned on his stick.

It took about a further twenty minutes for the party to arrive at the kitchen and by that point Young's legs were beginning to protest. He took a step back, stifling a hiss and flushed a little as Susannah and Rush spun to stare at him, followed by Eli and Volker who were at the other two consoles. Susannah scooted out of the chair.

"Sit." She said. "It's not as if you can be any worse with the console than I am."

Rush snorted, but Young's knee was giving him enough grief that he moved round Rush and sat. He could hear Becker's voice over the kino as he started giving orders to the airmen to stack items on the kino sleds and Brody's voice further away, almost out of hearing. Rush leaned forward, resting his forearm on Young's shoulder, Young could smell the antiseptic smell of the dressing next to his cheek.

"Swap to the kino following Brody." Rush told him. "Drag that red button up to centre screen."

Young did as asked and the red button bloomed into the second kino feed. Brody's party had just left the kitchen area and were passing down a corridor, pretty much indistinguishable from any other of Destiny's corridors. They watched intently. Young shifting slightly to accommodate the weight of Rush who was leaning on his shoulder, head forward and so close his hair was almost brushing Young's head.

The group seemed to be travelling through a reasonably untouched area, passing under only one small hull breach, sealed by the shields, footsteps echoing in empty halls. They ignored side passages, continuing towards the most easily accessible of the large areas.

There were several hatches that were jammed or otherwise non-functional, and each time either Brody managed to open it from their end or Eli managed to work around it from this end. Each time Young couldn't help a stab of anxiety shooting through him, warning him of the potential for disaster here, his mind replaying the image of the frozen room on the last mission. He shifted nervously, and hissed when he bumped his knee against the console. Rush looked down at him warily, but he just shook his head and motioned that Rush should return to watching the kino feed

Practically every time though the causes were burned out squingies (and Young thought Eli should really think harder about his choices for component names) or faulty relays. It was time consuming to identify the cause but the resolution was usually quick once figured out, and the party moved on.

It seemed too easy. Young's brain kept asking him, why was it so easy? And if it was so straightforward, why hadn't they done this before? But it hadn't been as easy to get this far, to reach the kitchen, and before the map had been discovered all exploration was working blind.

"We're here." Said Brody, as the group stopped before a large doorway, similar but a little larger and a little taller than the entrance to the bridge. "Are we ready?"

Eli picked up the radio and Young heard him in double echo back through the kino. "Sensors aren't showing anything dangerous in there."

Brody took an audibly deep breath and hit the door release.

"Holy frigging cow." Brody's voice was hoarse.

Racks of shelves stretched out ahead down a wide aisle. Many were empty or almost so, but there were still crates of varying sizes on over half the shelves, rank after rank of them, stretching away down the warehouse sized room, all labelled in Ancient script.

"It's like Area 51 or something." Eli breathed.

"I can assure you it's nothing like Area 51." Rush said, sourly but almost absently.

Young looked over as Eli stared across at Rush.

"You're kidding me right?"

Young shook his head.

"Why did no-one EVER think to mention Area 51 actually exists?" Eli complained.

 "Never came up in conversation." Volker muttered. "It's not like we can go there."

"No, but…"

"Focus Eli!" Rush snapped.

There was silence as they all watched the kino feeds. Brody and his team walked into the room, Ramirez pulling a second kino out of his backpack and setting it free. There was a tapping from Eli's console and a second video feed popped up, the kino spinning 360 degrees to pan around.

"Why hasn't this all been used up?" Volker asked.

The kino's floated around for almost a minute before Rush evidently spotted something.

"Pan left." His weight shifted further forward onto Young as Young manoeuvred the kino around. "There, that's your reason."

Along the wall there were a series of empty racks, fifty, seventy, maybe more. At the nearest end, still racked, was a maintenance robot, the same as they had left on the outside of the hull, but this one had an ominous looking scorch mark coming out of the panelling on one side. The kino floated around it.

"The last one here, and broken." Said Rush.

The group had evidently noticed the damaged drone also as he could hear their voices approaching the kino.

"Looks pretty fried." Brody reported, moving in to look at it. "It's one of the maintenance drones. The last one I guess. Explains why none of this stuff has been used in a while. Nothing to use it."

Young picked up the radio.

"Pretty much what Rush was saying. Can you identify any of the other crates?"

Brody stepped in front of the kino lens and looked at them.

"There's some squingies several aisles down, one of the crates was open. But a lot of this stuff is nothing we've come across yet. There's what looks like panelling stacked at the far end. I'm hoping it's hull panels and bulkheads so we can repair some of the breaches. If we're lucky there will be dome panelling."

The bridge crew watched as the exploratory party started to open crates, Brody chalking on the side of any crates holding anything identifiable. Rush and Eli were stopping the kinos intermittently to translate crate labelling, although it appeared that only about half the crates were labelled.

"I don't think we're going to be able to empty this room for hydroponics." Volker said.

"I'd agree with you on that." Young said. "No way are we going to be able to move that much stuff out."

"Where would we even store it?" Eli asked. "Maybe the other room is emptier. I mean they've had several million years to use up all the spare parts right?"

"Your guess is as good as mine." Young said.

"Probably better." Muttered Rush.

Young shook his head disbelievingly.

Rush continued. "I could really do with taking a look at…"

"No." Susannah cut him off sharply. "You are going nowhere. None of the four of you I've been treating are going anywhere, and I've made that perfectly clear to Lieutenant Johansen, Sergeant Greer and Corporal Barnes also. You are off strenuous duties until I'm satisfied you are all recovered, you especially."

Rush huffed, but said nothing, opting to watch the rest of the exploration. Young let them continue for another hour, recording and tagging identifiable items, and establishing that among other things there was indeed a significant amount of hull plates and bulkhead panels at the far end of the room.

"Lets just hope that the other room has the dome panels in." Eli said. "I could do with some fresh greens, and I NEVER thought I'd EVER say that."

 

 

Young spent most of the next two days watching as the identifiable contents of the kitchen and storage were catalogued and keeping an eye on the supplies manifest. Not necessary, but he wanted to keep a strict hand on what the science team were getting up to. He wouldn't put it past Rush, or any of them to be honest, to start some creative thinking about what they could play with. There were priorities here, and he knew their's diverged from his. Various parties were tasked with bringing back immediately needed and identifiable parts from the storage and items from the kitchen. He called a rather hastily convened planning meeting in the core interface room at the end of the second day to establish what else was relevant or necessary from the storage and kitchen area.

"For the moment," said Becker, a little uncomfortable to be included in the meeting, "I've got everything I want from the kitchen." He shifted and grinned. "But what I've got is going to make cooking a whole lot easier and there's more plates and cutlery so we won't have to eat in shifts no more, though they don't seem to have used forks, just knives and spoons. No big deal." He shrugged. "I'd better be getting back Colonel."

Young nodded and gestured for him to go.

"Well that frees up a working team." Rush said, rubbing his chin with his knuckles. "We should look at a good route to the second storage chamber."

Eli nodded enthusiastically.

"No," Young said. "I'm not authorising any investigation of unexplored areas until we're back at full complement." He looked directly at Rush. "Both you and TJ need to be cleared for full duty by Susannah before we are undertaking anymore exploration."

"That's bloody ludicrous. I'll be a week …"

"More actually," TJ said. "Doctor Macarthur said probably two more days wrapped and at least another ten to fourteen days before she'd consider allowing you to do anything more than using a pencil or eating utensils, and banging on a keyboard." She furrowed her brow, looking at him seriously. "And she's signed you off anything that risks you getting cold for two months. Greer, Barnes and me too, just in case."

"That's fucking ridiculous!"

"There's a lot of damage between the two areas, it's unexplored, potentially dangerous and my chief scientist and chief medical officer are on reduced duties due to injury...?" Young let the question tail off and leaned back against the console and stuck his hands in his pockets. Rush glared. "Anyway," Young said, "Brody, you were saying that we now have the bulkhead panels to fix the breaches in the inhabited area? Make us all a bit safer?"

Brody nodded. "We should be able to seal some of them from the inside without breaching the shields. There's a few where we will have to take out enough of the hull that the shields won't be a sufficient seal, we'll need the suits for those."

Young nodded, he could see Rush scowling in his peripheral vision.

"What about the coolant leak?" Rush demanded.

"Another piece of work that is _not getting started until we are all back to full fitness_." Young said. "I am damn well not risking any further crew on that project when as I said before, myself, my chief medical officer and my chief scientist are not there to pull their asses out if something goes wrong. I'm not dealing with possibilities when there are real risks much closer to home we can resolve simply." He turned to Brody. "Brody, how many personnel do you need and how long will it take?"

Brody gave his estimates and Young brought the meeting to a close. The rest of the meeting was likely to simply be Rush glaring at him and sniping, and any other business he could deal with personally.

Susannah finally pronounced Rush's hands safe to be unwrapped if he remained on light duties and announced she was cutting down her time on Destiny to one day a week until she was convinced there were no further ill effects. Her last task before she left for the week was to order Young to the infirmary for an assessment of his knee.

"Well," she said. "It's not good. I think you've got a chronic injury to your meniscus."

Young looked at her blankly.

"In terms you can understand, the cartilage in your knee is damaged." She said. "It's not as bad as it could be and won't stop you doing things if you have to, but you're going to have to be careful. And by that I mean don't push it too far, and if it starts to hurt you stop." She stared into his face. "I mean that. You should stay on the stick for at least another two weeks, and use it any time it starts to hurt again. If you do too much on it, it will flare up again, and if you push it you could tear it, which would be extremely painful and a much more serious problem. One that you aren't going to be able to get fixed out here."

Young slid off the gurney and lowered himself to the floor carefully. "I get it." He said. "It's not as if they can put me on a desk job out here though."

"No." Susannah said. "But you could make yourself completely useless if you don't take a bit of care now, I'm talking pretty much constant pain walking and a permanent limp if you tear it. And I can't see you wanting to be stuck behind a desk if you do make it back."

Young nodded, a little thoughtfully. TJ was watching from where she was stood leaning on the edge of the desk and Susannah turned to her. "Keep an eye on him." Susannah instructed. "Don't let him or Rush do anything I've disallowed."

"Yes ma'am." TJ said with a smile at Susannah.

"And take it easy yourself for another week or two."

TJ nodded, still smiling then turned to Young, planting her hands either side of her on the desk and gave him a stern look. Young scowled, trying to channel Rush for full sarcastic effect. It failed.


	12. Frozen

Young rearranged the rotas for facilitate maintenance and scheduled Rush onto the bridge everyday, it kept him out of trouble and freed up Brody, Eli and Volker to supervise repairs. It wasn't a popular option, Rush sulked, but Young had taken one look at his scabbed reddened fingers covered in dried out blisters that snaked down over his hands and instantly backed up Susannah's decision there was to be no working with his hands.

Young barely saw Rush, he was free to go back to his own quarters and with an ability to use a cutter and welder Young had volunteered himself onto a maintenance party.

"Are you sure you're up for this?" Brody asked doubtfully.

Young rocked his head from side to side. "If you tell me what to cut or weld, I can do it without cutting my fingers off, or burning holes in myself or anything else. I'm not going to be making any professional judgements though, and I'm pretty certain Susannah will kill me if I do any heavy lifting."

Brody grinned. "More than I can expect from half the crew here." He said. "Nice to know you won't be too much of a liability."

 xxxoooxxx

There was at least two weeks worth of work ahead even with all available hands. However, it made Young sleep better at night knowing that there would be no rooms or corridors around the inhabited area where only a thin film of energy stood between them and decompression and stellar radiation. Two weeks well spent.

In fact it was sixteen days all told, taking account of two emergency stops for larger breaches to be sealed by crew wearing the suits.

 xxxoooxxx

Young grabbed his plate of food and turned to scan the room. Rush was sitting, on his own as usual, at a bench by the far wall. Young walked over and sat down opposite.

"Colonel."

Young nodded, then looked down and stirred the soup in his bowl. "How's it been on the bridge."

"Deadly boring." Rush said, in a sour voice. "I can think of better things to have been doin' with my time."

Young took a spoonful of soup before looking up.

"We're all done with the patches."

"I know."

Young watched as Rush took a couple spoonfuls of soup, waiting for the follow up to that statement.

"The air pressure is more stable in the inhabited area." Rush said.

Young was surprised at the concession.

Rush rested his spoon on the edge of his plate. "But we're still losing power at a significant rate from the coolant leak." He said pointedly.

Young had some more soup, considering the options.

"Do you reckon you can talk Eli and Brody through the repairs via kino?"

"It'd be quicker if I…"

"No." Young cut him off. "Nothing that risks you in the cold."

Rush scowled again. "Yes." He said. "I can do it. But we'll need to retrieve the components we'll need from storage again. Pipes, caulk, conduit and the like."

"Fine." Young said. "Speak to Brody and get him to arrange another trip to the storage we've already found. After that I'll schedule a meeting to plan what we do next."

Rush appeared somewhat mollified, and they both turned back to the food in silence.

 

xxxoooxxx

 

Rush sat back in the command chair a moment, running over the data in his mind. Eli and Greer were at the consoles, Eli looking at something on the screen and Greer alternating between watching the console and darning a hole in a pair of underpants. The underpants were not military issue and it passed briefly through Rush's mind to wonder whose they were, certainly not Park's, they were men's underpants. He turned his attention back to a readout.

The power levels were still dropping at a much faster rate than he had hoped. It annoyed him that Young had not yet permitted him to undertake the repairs on the coolant leak, which might have gone some way towards mitigating the effects of this. Despite the fact that Brody and Eli had undertaken the trip to the storage two days ago, Young had yet to schedule a meeting.

There was little else they could practically do to conserve power levels but it was rapidly nearing the stage where they would have to drop out of FTL and refuel, whether it was safe or not. At this stage that would mean a very dangerous refuelling and then years of sub light travel. The whole area they were travelling through was subject to a series of gravitational anomalies and the forces that would be in play on the ship and hull dropping out of FTL and going back into FTL, well the risks were extreme. It wasn't particularly safe traversing the area in FTL.

From Destiny's records, one of the Seed ships had been sacrificed from the first wave to travel through the area in sub light, and it had taken three hundred and fifty seven years and taken a significant amount of damage. That was time that they just didn't have, even though they were close to being free of the area, it would still mean two or three years of sub light travel, maybe more.

The only way that would be feasible would be back in stasis. The gaps between planets would be large enough there would be no way they could obtain enough provisions to sustain them, even if there were suitable planets. The idea of going back into stasis didn't bother him on a personal front, he wasn't missing anything or anyone on Earth, but it would have serious consequences for many other crew members. The idea of your family, your spouse, your parents growing old, maybe dying, while you slept...Well, Rush was not completely callous, it was pretty horrific. And the simple fact that it would involve the ship travelling through such a high risk environment, well the likelihood was Destiny wouldn't survive long enough to wake them anyway considering her current condition.

Eli looked back over his shoulder from the left hand console interrupting Rush's musings. "Have you seen these power readings? I think this is the equivalent of a gas warning light." He leaned back to show an orange box showing on his screen.

"Yes, I've been monitoring it for a couple of days."

"And you didn't mention it?"

"I didn't say that, I spoke to the Colonel, but it's not like there's anything we can do about it is there?"

Eli shrugged. Looking past him Rush could see the box as it flickered and turned red.

"Eli." Rush nodded at the console.

Eli spun and Rush looked down at his own console.

"Oh that's not good," Eli said, "it looks like Destiny is shutting down systems."

Rush scanned through a few screens carefully, his fingers still painful as they played over the screen.

"That's exactly what she's doing Eli."

"Are the power levels that low?" Eli asked pulling up more data.

"Apparently, she's planning ahead, levels are certainly higher than they were when she powered down when we were first here."

Rush pulled up the projections of how long they would have to remain in FTL. It looked like Destiny was expecting them to be in FTL for five more days, four nights, plus or minus one day and night with a margin for reaching the neatest suitable star on the other side of the danger zone.

"She's just powered down lights and life support in all areas except the inhabited zone and dialled back the shields to FTL minimum all over the ship, they're not going to be holding so much air." Eli reported. "Lucky we fixed the holes round here."

Rush scowled.

"I suspect she's felt able to do it precisely because we fixed the holes." He said sharply. "She's quite attentive to our frailties. I doubt she would have done it if it was likely to kill us. It's the first repairs we've made to the ship's superstructure though," he mused, "we didn't take into account how the AI would react to that."

Eli turned to look at him.

"She hasn't reacted."

"Yet." Rush said.

Eli turned back to the console and kept running through the systems.

"What's that mean for us?" Greer asked.

"No more exploring." Rush said. "No recharging anything, and it's probably going to be a bit colder. We're going to lose heat to the unpowered areas, and we're probably going to be short on atmosphere outside of our areas until we can find some way to replenish it."

Rush went back to look at the time and distance calculations again.

"We're going to do more than that." Eli said after a while. "She's dialled down the heating and lighting in all areas except the bridge, mess hall, infirmary, gate room and observation lounge."

Rush pulled up the data. Fuck. Just what he needed.

"You appear to be right Eli," He said aloud, keeping the unease out of his voice. "It looks like communal living is going to become very popular."

Greer laughed a little sourly. "More so than usual?"

"It would certainly appear so." Rush didn't bother to censor the distaste in his voice, it was not something anyone would expect him to appreciate.

 xxxoooxxx

When Brody came on the bridge at midnight with Varro and Chloe to take the night shift, Rush spent ten minutes explaining the issues and giving strict instructions that absolutely nothing non-essential was to be turned on or used and that they were to refer Colonel Young to him first thing in the morning for a briefing. Even Young would be able to grasp the scope of this problem.

"Is it going to be really cold?" Chloe asked.

"Yes." Rush replied shortly.

"Isn't that going to be a problem for you?"

Rush gave her a hard look. "Possibly, that remains to be seen." His firm tone effectively closed the conversation down and Chloe was too polite to push the issue.

He left the bridge, Eli following him.

"Are you going to be okay?" Eli persisted. "I mean, you do have to keep out of the cold now."

Rush almost growled, did everyone have to make comments on his health? "I will be fine Eli." He snapped. "I am sure if it becomes an issue, Lieutenant Johansen will very quickly have me sleeping in the infirmary."

Although the infirmary wouldn't be that much warmer than the rest of the inhabited area due to heat loss. Eli seemed not to consider this though. Rush realised Eli tended to take anything TJ said, or that relied on TJ's discretion and judgement pretty much as read.

They divided at the corridor junction and made for their own quarters. Rush's were further out on the edge of the inhabited area. Eli's quarters, not really quarters in the true sense of the word, were right in the centre. As he got close to the outer edge, Rush could feel the temperature dropping off a little already and the cold seeping through his clothes.

His quarters were no warmer than the corridors and stopping only to take off his shoes, he dived under the bedclothes immediately, pulling them in tight. He had double bedding already and he wrapped himself tightly in it, waiting for it to warm up and for sleep to arrive. Hopefully he would be asleep before it got really cold.

Sleep eluded him. He knew it was because he was worried about the effects of the power down, and lay there waiting, analysing the feel of the air on his exposed face. His abused ear tips began to feel uncomfortable in the chill of the room and he pulled the covers up round his head so just his face was exposed and tried to sleep. Closing his eyes and running through things in his head, replaying pieces of music he could play or knew well, counting in prime numbers until he ran out of memorised ones and couldn't be bothered to work out if they were or weren't in his head.

He opened his eyes. The bed didn't feel any warmer than it had when he got in. He shuddered, and started with Crusell's Clarinet Concerto in E Flat Major, humming the main themes as his brain replayed the whole score in his head. He hadn't got far into it when he opened his eyes and realised his breath was beginning to be visible in the air. This was a bad sign. His rooms were probably the closest to the edge of the inhabited area, against the external wall and close to the major bulkhead hatches that defined their living space. Not all of what they referred to as the inhabited area was actually inhabited. Destiny was laid out in predefined segments, defined by more substantial infrastructure and bulkheads, within which the rooms were separated with less robust engineering. The "inhabited area" now included the bridge section and comprised three segments of Destiny that they had occupied.

Rush's rooms were going to be cold first and coldest. He shuddered again. His bed actually felt colder than when he had got in and there was an ache starting to creep into his hands where they were clenched into the covers, despite the fact they were buried within them. Fuck, fuck and damn. This was ridiculous. His mind played over his options, the first of which he discarded instantly.

The infirmary was another option, which would at least be marginally warmer, if with no privacy and the fact that Lieutenant Johansen would feel the need to constantly monitor him. The idea of another five days effectively trapped in the infirmary however, made him feel stressed and frustrated just thinking about it. There was the observation lounge. Still partly heated and closer to the centre of the warm area. The mess hall was out, far too busy too early and Becker would be in there at some ridiculous hour of the morning clattering. Additionally there was a strong possibility of insomniac crew wandering in.

He realised he was shivering and the ache in his hands was beginning to rise to levels that couldn't be ignored. One thing was clear, staying here was not an option. His hands felt sore and cramped, and letting go of the covers was actually painful as his hands unclenched. He sat up, swung his legs over the edge of the bed and stamped them into his boots, trying to stop the shivers. Standing up he hauled both his sets of covers round him and stood. Observation lounge.

He met no one in the corridors, not surprising considering it must be past one am in the morning and made his way towards the Observation Lounge, feeling a little foolish at wandering around wrapped in his bedding. When he got to the lounge he was surprised to hear voices. He stood, just outside the door, just out of sight and stared across the room. One voice was instantly recognisable. Eli. He looked towards the windows and realised that there were two figures, sprawled on the bench, not close, just talking quietly. After a moment, his mind filled in the other voice as Calvos.

Fuck. He took a couple of quiet steps back and walked away. His mind scanned back to his first option. No. Damn he was cold. This was so frustrating! He stopped dead, turned to the wall, trying to turn away from his thoughts. He wanted to clench his fists in annoyance but his hands were painful enough already, telling him that staying in the cold like this was going to result in consequences. Already the pain was making it hard to hang on to the blankets around him. The first option. He swallowed his pride, turned back and walked towards Young's quarters.

 xxxoooxxx

Young woke as the door opened. Rush stepped into the room quickly closing the door behind him. Young blinked at him and rubbed his eyes.

"What is it?" Young asked, turning on the light as Rush closed the door.

Rush looked embarrassed and Young realised he had blankets wrapped round his shoulders.

"I'm cold." He said. "Really fucking cold." He took another step forward. "I can't warm up."

Young sat up. Cold air hit his skin. "It feels pretty cold in here."

"Destiny's conserving power." Rush said, and Young could hear it in his voice as he shivered. "She needs to stay in FTL for another five days to get out of the danger area, but power levels are getting low."

"So she's turned the heating down."

"Turned everything off except for in the inhabited area, and turned our resources down, lights, heating, peripheral consoles." Rush said. "I checked the console before I came off the bridge and left instructions not to use anything not absolutely necessary until the morning."

Young looked at his watch. Just gone half past one in the morning, Rush's shift had finished at midnight, in the week since the second storage trip, bridge crew scheduling was back to normal. Rush shuddered again, twitching the blankets closer round him. Young realised Rush must have been back to his own quarters to get the blankets, probably tried to sleep.

"So you came here to warm up." He said to Rush.

"My quarters are literally freezing. I could see my breath." He shifted the blankets round his shoulders, hands moving a little stiffly under the fabric. "I'm under strict instructions not to get cold, my hands are killing me and it's not like I've got anywhere else I can go." Rush said acidly. He failed to suppress a shiver.

Young nodded, and slid back under the covers, lifting the edge, trying not to let all the heat out. "Get in." Young told him.

Rush moved over to the bed and reached for the covers.

"Take your pants off, you'll warm up quicker." Young instructed. "And flip those blankets over the top of us."

Rush hesitated for a moment, then sat on the edge of the bed and removed his pants with fumbling fingers. For a moment Young wondered if he'd manage it, his hands appeared clumsy with the cold. Young reached out and pulled the blankets off his shoulders and flipping them over the bed as Rush slid in. Rush's foot hit his leg. It was like a block of ice.

"Damn Rush, you're frozen."

"I think that's what I already said." Rush said, sighing as he settled into the warmth.

"TJ and Susannah said you shouldn't get cold."

Rush snorted, shivering and pulling the covers up around his neck. "Like I said, I know, but I didn't really have much choice, did I?" He said. "Why d'ye think I came here."

Young reached out to touch Rush's shoulder, he was icy cold all over, even where he'd had a blanket wrapped round him and was still shivering. He ran his hand down Rush's arm to his hand, cold all the way down to frozen fingers, and Rush flinched.

"That hurts." Rush said sourly.

In his head Young ran over the information Susannah had shared about frostbite, it would hurt his hands and they were probably really painful with him being this cold.

"Is it just your hands that hurt?" He asked Rush.

"Yeah." Rush said. "They'll warm up soon enough."

They lay there for a short while, not touching but Young could still feel Rush as a cold presence next to him as if the cold radiated off him.

"Roll over." Young said, reaching out and shoving at Rush's arm.

He pushed Rush over bodily, rolling him onto his side, and wrapping an arm round him, pulled Rush back into his own body and the warm area of bed he'd already heated up. He spooned up around Rush, flinching as chilled skin and fabric hit him, tucking his knees in behind Rush's legs, and pulling the covers down tightly. He stifled his own shiver as he huddled himself into Rush's chilly skin. Rush had gone rigid.

"Rush, relax." Young said. "You want to warm up? This will warm you up faster. It's not like you haven't done it before."

He slid the arm closest to the bed under Rush's neck and wrapped the other round his ribs and relaxed. Young sighed, Rush was still bloody cold, he hoped he warmed up quickly. Incrementally Rush began to loosen up.

"So, five days of low power reserves. Is this going to cause a problem?" he asked after a while, speaking into the back of Rush's neck.

"If we're careful, then no." Rush said. "We just need to be as economical as possible with our energy. Not using systems we don't need. It'd be better if we'd fixed the coolant leak."

"Yeah, yeah, I can see. You can start looking at it soon."

"Thank you for giving your permission." Rush said acidly, but the tremor in his voice stole it's menace.

Tiredly Young rested his forehead against the back of Rush's neck. "Looks like I've got company then for four nights doesn't it?" Young offered.

Rush shuddered again, but as the shiver subsided he seemed to yield to the situation, his muscles relaxed and he settled back against Young.

"Looks that way." Rush said neutrally.

Young rolled onto his back briefly and turned out the light before curling himself back around Rush and pulling the covers in around them.

"Let's get some sleep." He said.The next day was slow. Young held a briefing in the mess hall, explaining the situation, as if anyone could have failed to notice the sudden drop in temperature, and giving orders that nothing was to be used that wasn't absolutely essential. He gave Becker the order to increase rations for the next few days, an increase in calories until they were warm again. Thank God their supply levels were still good. It would increase morale as well.

With power levels preventing equipment being used or recharged, most of the crew were at loose ends. He was thankful for Camile who made a few suggestions and by lunchtime at least half of the crew were in the observation lounge, wrapped in blankets and listening as people took it in turns to read aloud. Apparently the argument over the book read had taken some time. Jane Austen, Park and Chloe's suggestion and Robert Heinlein's Stranger in a Strange Land, Brody and Airman Dunning's suggestion had been heavily vetoed in favour of a Wormhole X-treme! spin-off novel that they could all yell abuse at.

"It's getting quite loud at times." Cole said as she brought lunch to the bridge.

Young finished his bridge shift at 4pm and went to the Observation Lounge to find out how far they had progressed with the book. Doctor Fisher was reading. She seemed to have a good ear and ability for mimicry. He knew she'd been with the programme for some time, but evidently she'd met enough of the original SG1 to ensure that the characters in the book sounded disturbingly like them.

He sat down next to Camile near the back. He was awkward on his bad leg, stiff with the cold and clumsy with the stick, trying to be quiet and not disrupt the story

"Have you read it already?" Camile asked him.

"Yeah." He admitted. "But I think everyone has read every book on this ship." He shivered.

She nodded. "Want to come in?" she opened the blankets slightly.

He wasn't going to say no, it was too damn cold, and let her wrap the blankets round his shoulders as well. There was a burst of faux gun noises from the audience as " _the resolute Colonel Danning_ " shot the alien from it's perch on the top of the gun turret.

"I can't believe that someone from Icarus actually reads this crap." Young said.

Camile laughed. "Come on Everett, even you must see the humour in it."

Young grinned, he was well acquainted enough with all of the original SG1 to find it privately bloody hilarious. He also thought anyone would find something that sent up their commanding officer, line manager or whatever superior you happened to have, pretty funny.  Apparently Colonel Danning was now being hit on by the attractive female alien, Young hadn't really heard the words of the story, but the yell of "Get in there my son!" from one of the scientists on the other side of the room was a slight give away, and he'd seen enough episodes to know how the story was liable to go, even if he couldn't quite remember the plot.

"How long does Rush think it will be till we get out of FTL?" she asked him quietly.

"He said probably four more days, so another three nights and then we come out on the fourth day."

"Let's just hope it isn't any longer." She said. "Else the crew are going to get really frustrated."

Young shrugged. "Nothing we can do about it. It's frustrating; I think it'd be easier to put up with the cold if we were busy."

"Is there nothing people can do?"

Young sighed. "Most anything we do drains power. According to Rush and Eli, using any power at all would be a bad idea."

She mirrored his sigh and they went back to listening to the story as Doctor Levant translated the stone which allowed the team to enter the alien base.


	13. Acquiescence to the situation

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for delays in posting - I am still having some internet issues. :(

Young knew Rush would be loathe to come to bed with him again. However, even the communal areas, busy with crew and humming with conversation, were still cold, too cold for Rush to manage overnight. And Rush hated having to manage crowds of people all the time. To be honest, Young couldn't think of any situation more guaranteed to put Rush out of sorts, in pain, forced to socialise, unable to withdraw to any of his usual hiding places. He checked the mess and the observation lounge, the core room and finally found Rush on the bridge at a secondary console. He still had a blanket wrapped round his shoulders and wore a pair of fingerless gloves. He should have guessed, this would be the quietest of the inhabitable places on the ship.

It was gone midnight and the night shift wore on, James in the command chair with Eli and Ramirez. James acknowledged him with a "Colonel." And he nodded in response, before walking over to where Rush was hunched over the console, wrapped in his blanket. Rush looked up at Young as he stopped next to him a little unsteadily, the cold was having an adverse effect on Young's knee as well, making it ache.

"Nice gloves."

Rush glowered at him. "From Chloe. She knits." He admitted.

"They help?" Young asked curiously.

Rush shrugged then nodded. "Yeah." He turned back to the console.

There was something about the way that Rush was huddled up, not exactly pathetic but something that certainly aroused Young's sympathy. Young leaned down to speak, resting both hands on his cane, talking directly into Rush's ear.

"You ought to come to bed." He said quietly, slightly embarrassed.

"Now there's an offer." Rush murmured sarcastically.

"Rush." Young's could hear his tone was a little scandalised, rising in pitch a little and he schooled his voice to a quieter tone. "Don't make this any more damn uncomfortable than it already is."

Rush turned to look at him and Young pulled his back a little, Rush's face suddenly very close to his. Rush gave him a long look.

"Okay," Young hissed, "I get it, you hate this, but it's damn cold, you can't stay up forever and you can't sleep alone." He sighed, wondering if honesty was the best policy. Worth a try, no one else could hear. "And if I'm really honest, it's damn cold for me too and it's warmer with you in there."

Rush seemed surprised at his admission, searching his face, Young wasn't sure what for.

"At the risk of you being sarcastic again, come to bed Rush, it's late, I'm cold."

There was a pause.

"There's lots of it going on." Rush said quietly. "Eli is in with Brody and Calvos, and TJ and Cole are bunking together."

"Fine." Said Young, wondering how Rush knew all this when he was so damned antisocial. "Are you coming?"

Rush huffed. "I'll be there in a few minutes." He said. "Piss off."

Young stood, nodded to James and walked out. He made his way to his quarters. The rest of Rush's bedding was still spread across his bed, and he pulled it all into some sort of order before stripping off his pants and jacket and sliding under the covers.

He wondered, turning over Rush's throwaway comment that TJ was bunking with Cole, whether if Rush had not come to him needing this...warmth at the beginning, if he would have been brave enough to approach TJ himself. Somehow that thought as an idealised concept was attractive, but considered in a more realistic light seemed manipulative and contrived. A poor excuse to renew intimacy without addressing the fundamental issues in their relationship. In an insane way it was far easier to share his bed with Rush, there were no preconceived expectations of intimacy in that relationship.

The hatch opened and Rush slipped in quietly, closing it behind him. Young caught his eye, then suddenly uncomfortable gave him an awkward half smile and rolled over to face away. The blanket Rush had been wearing was thrown across the bed. He could hear Rush removing his pants, clink of buckle, fabric noises, and the bed shifted as he slid in.

He felt the shift of the mattress and the blankets as Rush laid down, shifting so he was under the covers. Young had expected him to move towards Young, into the warm part of the bed at least, but Rush stayed on the other side of the bed, not moving or touching Young. Young waited but nothing happened, finally he rolled over. Rush was lying on his side facing Young, only inches between them. Young found himself looking into Rush's eyes. Somehow lying face to face with Rush seemed much more intimate than being spooned up around him.

He reached out to see how cold Rush was, touching Rush's arms, bicep and the opposite forearm where it was flexed against the mattress propping him up. Rush flinched but Young slid his hands down to Rush's wrists taking hold of his hands gently. They were shockingly cold and had to be painful. The idea of moving closer was a little uncomfortable but Young scooted forward a little, wrapping his own hands around them and drawing them forward to press them against the comparative warmth of his chest.

Rush flattened his hands against the warmth of Young's chest with a hiss of pain and a grateful expression. Young pressed his palms flat over the back of Rush's hands, enveloping them in warmth. The cold seeped through his shirt and he could smell the medicated ointment TJ had given Rush for the cracked skin.

Young looked down, in the shadow of the blankets he could just see Rush's pale hands against his chest. The shadows stole the damage from Rush's skin and all he could see was Rush's narrow hands and long fingers splayed over his chest, pressed there by his own hands. He took a deep breath and Rush's fingers flexed reflexively. He looked up, Rush was watching him with a guarded expression, looking unnerved. Young wanted to say something to break the tension. He blinked and looked away, unable to manage the eye contact any longer. How could the simple contact of Rush's hands on his chest suddenly seem more uncomfortably personal than being spooned against someone from chest to knee?

Rush shivered, suddenly breaking the tension. Young felt himself shudder in reaction to the movement, and realised Rush must still be freezing. He reached out and turned out the light, then before he had a chance to change his mind, rolled, sliding under Rush's arm and moving back against Rush. He rested his head against Rush's bicep and pulled the other arm round him, tucking the hand against his belly then wrapping both hands around Rush's other hand to warm it.

Rush was still cold against him and he felt Rush lean into his warmth with an exhalation that wasn't quite a sigh, knees coming up behind his, a cold bare foot tucking round his ankle for stability. The hand on his stomach moved and Rush pulled the layers of blankets tight round them, almost over their heads, before replacing the hand. He felt Rush shudder again, and it really was freezing cold still, then relax against Young. For his part Young scooted back a little further into the other man's body craving the heat that would build in the nest of blankets. He'd been chilled all day, his knee ached and he had no idea how Rush had coped. He lay there, feeling the warmth build, Rush gradually becoming warmer, and at some point, he fell asleep.

 

 

Rush awoke. Warmth surrounded him, his limbs felt heavy and, it was inevitable he had known it would happen eventually, there was a distinct hardness in his underwear. In and of itself it was normal, typical and nothing to be bothered about. However the fact that he was spooned around Young meant he was pressed snugly up against Young's ass and that was altogether too disturbing a concept. Young shifted against him and Rush twitched and swallowed hard. Fuck, that was just wrong. Young was also likely to be distinctly unhappy about it if he woke up. Rush slid his arm out from around Young's waist and moved back carefully, rolling over to retrieve the mobile phone from the counter by the bed. His bladder was also sending him messages it would need emptying soon.

He had rolled into the cold part of the bed and shuddered as he looked for the time. Five thirty am, still early. Sleeping in here in the warm he always managed to fall asleep quickly and wake early. Behind him Young shifted and mumbled, but he slid out of bed, hissing as his feet hit the freezing cold floor. He dragged on pants and cautiously opening the door, stepped out into the corridor alert for passers by, and made his way quietly to the toilet.

The cold quite swiftly relieved the arising issue in his pants and a quick piss relieved his aching bladder. He washed his hands and stood staring into the mirror, dragging fingers through his tangled hair and absently scratching at his beard. It was still absolutely freezing in here. He could feel his hands beginning to warn him that things were going to be quite uncomfortable soon.

Well, he had two choices, go back to bed or get dressed and go find something to do. Not that there was much that he could do, but he could go to the bridge. Or he could go back and climb back into bed with Young and stay warm until such point as the other man felt the need to get up. Neither of them had a bridge shift today. He began to shiver, whatever he decided the rest of his clothes were in Young's quarters. He left the bathroom, walking back as quickly as possible and looking around a little furtively before re-entering the room.

Young looked at him drowsily from the bed, evidently only just woken up.

"Wha…?" Young said. "You went…?"

"Toilet." Rush replied in explanation.

"'S cold." Young said, eyes drooping.

Rush shed his pants and slid back into the warmth of the bed before he could reconsider his decision. Young was evidently still mostly asleep as, as Rush slid back over into the warm spot, he wrapped himself round Rush with a sigh. Rush found himself lying on his back with Young wrapped around him, leg thrown across his thighs, arm across Rush's body and head on his shoulder, face tucked into Rush's chest and dropping straight back into sleep.

As much as it had shocked Rush how undisturbed he had been by Young moving in his bed all those weeks ago, it was more surprising to him how his presence in Young's bed and movement had left Young undisturbed. The man was a soldier, and Rush would have expected him to find Rush's presence in his personal space a problem, stop him relaxing. Evidently not. His absence had woken him, though that was likely just the cold. Rush tucked the covers up tightly, closed his eyes and let himself drift in the heat radiating off the other man.

 

Young woke, recognising quickly this time where he was. He was snuggled up against Rush's side, head resting on Rush's chest, leg and arm wrapped round him, and almost completely under the covers. He sighed. No matter how he went to sleep with Rush, somehow he always ended up waking up in some compromising position. As long as Rush stayed asleep though, he was warm, comfortable and relaxed and didn't have to think too much about it. He shifted slightly, a little overly aware of bare flesh under his thigh, but he was too relaxed to want to shift.

It was a little disturbing how much he enjoyed this, body contact, being held. He could admit to himself, and had before, that physical comfort had been little and far between over the last few years. Rush shifted in his sleep, moved his hand up Young's back sleepily, to cup the back of Young's head, fingers tangling in Young's hair. Young moved his head into the gesture before he realised he'd even done it then stopped and sighed again.

He lay there for a long while, thoughts drifting randomly across topics, none of them important or serious.

"I woulda thought you had somewhere to be." Rush murmured.

Young tensed, startled. He had thought Rush was asleep. Rush felt relaxed, loose limbed and breathing steady. Awake, Rush was always either still and focussed or moving, never soft and relaxed.

"I thought you were asleep." Young said. "I didn't want to wake you. There's nowhere I need to be yet."

Rush's fingers flexed briefly in Young's hair before moving and sliding down to Young's shoulder. Young shifted and the arm round his back released slightly. Young contemplated how to move, but any move appeared to involve either losing the warm body contact or moving into or through an uncomfortably intimate position. He relaxed his muscles, shifting his leg slightly lower down Rush's thigh and pulling his hand back to scratch at his hair.

"Young?"

Young shifted his head and looked up at Rush.

"You moved." Rush said.

"I can move back."

"No." Rush lifted his other hand and shoved his hair out of his face. "What's the time?"

Young brought his free wrist up to look at his watch. "Eight thirty. Do you want me to move so you can go?"

"It's cold and I'm gonna hurt when I get out there." Rush said. There was a short pause, as if Rush was steeling himself to speak. "I've spent the last two days in a lot o' pain. If you don't mind I'd prefer to stay here while you're keeping it warm."

There was a heavy silence, Rush seemed to be waiting for him to respond, muscles just a little tense against Young. Young shifted his arm loosely back over Rush's chest, letting his hand dangle casually down the other side.

"We can stay for a while." He offered. "We'll have to get some food at some point, and make some sort of an appearance; else people will wonder where I've got to." He laughed quietly. "You're altogether more elusive; no-one's gonna be surprised if they don't see you."

Rush snorted. "Well another hour or two dozing would suit me fine."

Young let all the tension drain out of him, his own weight pressing him into the mattress and Rush's side. There didn't seem a better way to lie, and moving apart would defeat the point of being here. Rush exhaled and relaxed, seemingly in response and the tension lifted.

"Fine," Young murmured. "Dozing in the warm it is then."

 

They managed another hour and a half of napping, both of them drifting in and out of sleep before Young's stomach growled so loudly that Rush actually laughed. Rush slid out from under Young's arm and reaching out, pulled their clothes into the bed to warm them up before they dressed.

The corridor outside was deserted so they left the room together and made for the mess hall. It was reasonably quiet, just a handful of people to look up as they walked in. Becker served them up two good sized portions of a thick porridge, steaming and smelling sweet with the dried fruit that had been cooked into it. It tasted as good as it smelled. Young looked up at Rush, still wrapped in his blanket, who had taken a seat opposite him and was shovelling porridge into his mouth single-mindedly. He looked back down and attended to his own meal while it was still hot.

Well rested, full of hot, tasty food, sitting in companionable silence Young wasn't quite sure what he should do next.

"Chess?" said Rush.

But that certainly wasn't something he'd considered.

"Fine." Young said. "Sounds good."

"Board's in m' quarters." Rush said, going to stand.

"No, it's freezing, you stay here, I'll get it." Young said. "You'll be good for nothing by the time you get back."

Young collected the chess board as quickly as possible. On the edge of the inhabited area by Rush's quarters the cold was extreme, his breath hanging in chilled clouds in the air. He grabbed the board and made his way back to the mess hall. When he got back, TJ had stolen his seat opposite Rush, wrapped in her own blanket. Her voice was quiet but intent.

"Look Doctor, I know you're a very private person, but you know these temperatures are bad for you. You shouldn't be sleeping on your own, and honestly, no one is. I'm not."

Rush looked up from the Ancient mug of tea he had his gloved hands wrapped around.

"Lieutenant Johansen…"

Young slid onto the bench next to TJ.

"He's been in with me." Young said quietly. "I asked. I couldn't ask anyone under my command, could I TJ? It'd be inappropriate for me to put myself in a position that could be seen as compromising. Rush humoured me."

TJ looked surprised. She looked from Rush to Young and back again. Rush shrugged.

"He explained." Rush lied, his voice a low mutter. "He had a good point. I needed somewhere warm. It's not been the most…comfortable situation…"

Young rolled his eyes at Rush, safe as TJ was still looking at the other man.

"…but yes. We're warm enough."

"Fine." TJ said looking at one then the other. "I'm glad you're both okay. I was a little concerned."

"We're fine TJ." Young said.

She still looked a little concerned, although Young wasn't sure what was bothering her but she nodded. Pulling her blanket round her again, she stood and left.

Rush and Young played chess until Becker started serving the midday meal, then started again after eating until the afternoon shift change.

"We'd better have a quick briefing with Scott and Camile." Young said.

"No point until I've checked our situation." Rush said. "Schedule it for five thirty and I'll take a look at the systems on the bridge."

Rush stood, tugging the blankets around him and left. Young stared at the chess board in front of him, then sighing, packed the chess pieces in the fabric bag and put them on top of the board. He pulled out his radio and let Camile, Scott and TJ know about the briefing, then collected another cup of tea and sat back down.

TJ walked in first. She grabbed a cup of tea from the counter and walked over.

"Still here?" She asked.

"Nothing better to do." Young said.

She sat down opposite him. "I was kind of surprised about you and Rush." She tipped he her head a little and regarded him over the rim of her cup.

Young shrugged. "I was kinda stuck for options." He gave a wry smile. "And Rush is too…well too Rush to ask anyone outright."

She laughed. "Yeah." She looked at the table. "You didn't ask me." She said quietly, with a slight smile. Young wasn't sure, but he didn't think she looked upset, maybe a little wistful.

"It would have seemed kinda…" he floundered, casting around for the right words, "presumptuous?"

She looked at him.

"We only really just started talking off duty again." He said. "And then if I went and asked you to share a bed…?" He took a breath and let it out slowly. "It might have given the wrong impression. Just start talking to someone you've been involved with and then you try and get into bed with them?"

She gave a quiet laugh. "Yeah, I see what you mean. And I might well have thought that."

"And then I realised Rush would probably try and get through it on his own." Young said.

"And you solved two problems at once." She said.

"Well, he kinda asked when I said something." Young said, feeling slightly guilty about lying. "He wasn't as stubborn about it as I thought he was."

TJ raised her eyebrows. "That's a surprise."

"Yeah." Young agreed. "He's been surprising me quite a lot recently."

TJ gave him a wicked grin. "If I was the gossiping type I'd ask you what he's like in bed."

Young gave her a scandalised look, then leaned forward over the table, a conspiratorial look on his face. "Well, you know TJ…?"  He said quietly. She leaned in a little, and he dropped his voice even further. "He spoons in his sleep."

TJ's look was absolutely priceless.


	14. Back to normal?

They all sat huddled in their blankets in the mess during this abbreviated command briefing. Young hadn't complained that Chloe was there silently sharing Scott's blanket, tucked close into his side, he would quite have liked not to be the only warmth in his own blanket. TJ had walked in, seen Rush shivering in his blanket and immediately slid in with him, wrapping hers round the outside. Rush had glared but submitted to her urgent murmur. Young was very aware of them in his peripheral vision.

 

It was mainly routine stuff, updates about morale from Scott and Camile, and TJ reported on the general health of the crew. The most serious item had been Rush's feedback on their rapidly dwindling power reserves.

 

"So there's nothing we can do about the power loss? Camile asked. "We just have to live with it for a few more days."

 

"Correct." Rush was shifting under the blanket as if he was rubbing his hands. There was a brief movement from TJ and he stilled.

 

"Temperatures have been steadily falling all over the ship. I'm certain Destiny's energy reserves aren't sufficient to rectify the situation until after we recharge."

 

With that dismal outlook firm in their minds, no one waited around after the meeting concluded. They all wished to be warmer, so sought places or people to be warmer with. He could hear TJ having a quiet but urgent conversation with Rush. Young got himself a cup of tea whilst they talked, it was probably medical and he stayed out of earshot, allowing Rush some privacy. They'd had little enough of that the last few days. He waited until it had stopped, sipping at his tea and having a quiet word with Becker about the power allocations for food and tea, the only luxury, to be honest practical necessity, that they had allowed to mitigate the effects of the cold. Behind him he heard TJ leave.

 

Young and Rush left the briefing together. Young hadn't asked Rush, they simply waited until the others cleared the corridor before getting up. Rush gathered his chess set, hugging it to his chest, shivered and pulling his blanket close, he walked out. Young was slower to get up. His knee had stiffened up and now throbbed in the frigid air. He thought about getting something from TJ for the pain, but then it wasn't like they had a large amount of medical supplies and walking about he figured he was better actually being able to feel where it hurt rather than not feel it and make it worse. Rush was managing as well and Young figured he could tough it out if Rush could.

 

Young was several steps behind Rush as they headed to his quarters. The limp had kicked back in with a vengeance making his gait roll and he was forced to lean heavily on his cane. He concentrated on moving his knee as smoothly as possible, focussing on not losing his balance or allowing it to twist as he walked. Something internal kept catching, sending sharp spikes of pain up his leg.

 

Rush didn't look in any better condition, his sharp hiss of pain drawing Young's attention as his hand pressed the door release. As soon as the door was open Rush was making for the bed. Young walked over more slowly as Rush sat on the edge of the bed, the blanket falling from round his shoulders as he fumbled with the buttons of his jacket.

 

Young sighed, and then sat down, resting his cane between them and reached out. Rush growled as Young pushed his hands aside, but reluctantly submitted as Young undid the buttons on his jacket and shirt and then the buttons at his fly. Young left Rush to drag the clothes off and made short work of his own, before crawling into bed, scooting over to his usual place on the far side. He reached out and dragged their clothes in with them so they would be warm in the morning. Rush wasn't far behind him, sliding immediately over to Young and leaning against him, shivering.

 

It was too damn cold for either of them to care about anything but getting warm and Young wrapped himself round Rush as soon as the man was close. There was no demur from Rush who plastered himself to Young, tucking his frozen hands in between them. Young tucked his face into Rush's hair and they lay there shivering waiting for the bed to warm up.

 

It wasn't till they actually began to warm up that Young actually paid any attention to how they now lay in the bed. Face to face, legs tangled, arms wrapped round each other, Young's face buried in Rush's hair and the other man's face tucked into his neck. Young froze. Rush, totally exhausted, had fallen asleep as soon as the bed had got warm enough.

 

Rush was warm against him and the scent of his hair was heavy in Young's nostrils. The man was now firmly asleep, breathing soft, body a solid weight in Young's arms. As Young's body relaxed into the growing warmth of the bed, his mind was churning. Ordinarily the level of anxiety in his mind would be making him tense, but his level of exhaustion was overwhelming it and threatening to drag him down anyway. Rush shifted against him, mumbling and burying himself more firmly in the embrace.

 

If Rush was right, the day after tomorrow Destiny would come out of FTL, things would go back to normal and Rush would go back to his own bed. Young's mind was torn between disgust at himself for being so needy to want the company in his bed he'd had the past few nights, and a disquiet that he'd be on his own again. The thoughts turned over and over in his brain, but finally sleep claimed him, a black tide of exhaustion rising to pull him under.

 

The third day was hard. Young had an early bridge shift, but he struggled to pull himself out of the warmth of the bed. When he woke Rush was practically on top of him, head buried under the covers on Young's chest. They were pressed closely together with the covers pulled around them and he was warm, though as his foot moved away from them, the bed outside of their tightly wrapped nest was icy. He reached his arm out into the freezing cold and turned off the alarm on Rush's mobile phone.

 

"Rush." Young shifted. "Rush, wake up. I gotta get up."

 

Rush groaned, shifted and settled again. Young brought up his knees for leverage and rolled his hips to try and tip Rush off.

 

"Rush." He grabbed the man's shoulders and shook him gently. "Nick."

 

Rush twitched, grabbed at him and then started to struggle with the bed clothes. Young extricated them both from the tangled blankets. The room felt even colder than the previous night. From what Rush had said it probably was, but he had no way of telling.

 

"Come on," he said, "let's get some breakfast."

 

They dressed as fast as possible, then wrapped in blankets made their way to the mess hall. It was only when they arrived Young realised he hadn't even given a thought to getting caught. He felt his stomach turn over, but no-one seemed to notice or care as they made their way to the counter for a large bowl of thick porridge type stuff. Sitting opposite each other they ate silently. The room seemed pretty quiet and as Young looked around he realised that pretty much everyone in there was a silent and focussed as they were. Camile walked in wrapped in a blanket and collecting her food sat down next to Rush.

 

"You okay?" Young asked her.

 

He realised he had no idea who she was sharing with. By now all of the crew were sharing. Cole and TJ walked in as Camile picked up the spoon and Young guessed that probably answered that question.

 

"Yeah," Camile said, taking a mouthful. He waited while she took a few more mouthfuls. "I'm cold," she said with a wry smile, "but if it's only another day I'll manage."

 

The look she shot at Rush was hopeful.

 

Rush nodded. "I haven't checked this morning." He said. "But the last figures I had yesterday were still indicating it would be tomorrow."

 

"Thank God." Camile said. "I'm not sure any of us could take any more of this."

 

Young scraped the last of his porridge out of the bowl. He swallowed it then picked up his tea. "What's morale like?"

 

"Stoic." Camile said. "Pretty good considering. If we don't drop out and refuel tomorrow I think it will be difficult, but presuming Destiny performs as expected, I think we'll be fine."

 

 

 

"My goodness it is cold here." Susannah looked around her. TJ smiled at her from where she was waiting in the doorway to the stones room. "You weren't lying when you said it was a problem. Well, I'm here for the check ups. How is everyone? How are you, how is Nicholas?"

 

TJ felt her cold tense shoulder muscles relax just a little now Susannah was here. "Cold, but mostly fine." TJ said. She led Susannah out of the stones room and into the deserted corridor, checking it was empty before she spoke quietly. "We've mostly been sharing beds for warmth. I was a bit worried about Rush, but somehow the Colonel managed to convince him to share with him."

 

Susannah looked at her. "That surprises you?"

 

"To be honest, yeah." TJ said turning her head to look at Susannah's expression.

 

Susannah nodded slowly, pulling Camile's blanket more tightly round her as she walked. "Everett spent a lot of time playing chess with him when he was in the infirmary."

 

TJ chewed on her lip. "Historically their relationship is…" She paused and looked at Susannah.

 

"It's fine." Susannah said. "I'm not going to be carrying tales back to Homeworld Command. I don't see it as a relevant issue in my treatment of them that I would need to record, you say it is not a current problem. Anyway, I'm a civilian, doctor-patient confidentiality."

 

Reassured, TJ gave her a grateful look and pressed the door release on the infirmary as they walked up to it. She waited till Susannah had stepped though and closed the door behind her before speaking.

 

"So, their relationship is troubled?" Susannah continued.

 

"Hostile. Possibly violent." TJ admitted. "Early on when we were here…I'm pretty certain they both tried to physically hurt each other. That they fought." She looked at Susannah to gauge her reaction. "I've got no proof," she added a little hurriedly, "neither of them ever said anything, and it's not the same now."

 

"Is it calmer now?"

 

"They seem to have come to some agreement. The Colonel agreed to stay on Destiny to help Rush complete the mission when Telford was trying to get a wormhole open and send everyone back. Rush doesn't seem to be trying to undermine him anymore and the Colonel seems more tolerant of Rush now."

 

"Did you agree to stay on Destiny?" Susannah asked her.

 

TJ sighed, walked over to the desk. Behind her she knew Susannah was listening, waiting for any answer TJ was willing to give, though she wouldn't push it. "Yes." She said finally, staring at the desk, not turning. "I've got nothing to lose. I'm…going to die. We had this…time travel thing, where there was a version of me, of all of us except Rush. It was the thing with Telford and two copies of the Destiny when he went back to Earth. He made it through but there was a problem with the gate and the rest of us after him went back in time and started a civilisation two thousand years ago in the last galaxy we were in.

 

"Except we didn't," she shrugged, "it was a time travel thing." TJ put her hands flat on the desk, leaning on it. "We met our descendents. Everett and I were married, had children but....I'm going to start showing symptoms of ALS in five years time."

 

"Oh sweetheart." Susannah said, coming up behind her and drawing her into a hug.

 

"Back then we didn't know, Everett and I, we married, started a family, and then I got sick and died and left him to raise our family on his own."

 

"So now you know and now you won't get close to anyone." Susannah said. "Because whoever you get close to is going to lose you."

 

TJ nodded mutely.

 

"They all know this?" Susannah asked. "Everyone here?"

 

TJ nodded again, throat too tight to speak.

 

"Then let them make the decision." Susannah advised her. "You don't have to keep everyone at arms length. Let them make the decision as to whether they can handle it. They're adults. You're allowed to have friends at least, it's not contagious." TJ felt the tears rising and Susannah patted her back as finally her chest started to hitch. Susannah turned her round and hugged her as TJ sobbed into Susannah's shoulder.

 

 

 

The descending hum, the shuddering tone and the feeling that the universe was sliding sideways from underneath you caught Young unawares. The universe steadied again. He looked up immediately, his gaze instantly going to where Rush was sat at a console to see that weirdly Rush's first reaction had been exactly the same. Their eyes locked for a moment, before by some unspoken agreement they both looked away. They had all been waiting for it, waiting for Destiny to drop out of FTL and things to go back to normal.

 

Young wasn't sure what normal was anymore.

 

The previous night had found both of them so cold and Rush in so much pain that there had been no thought of anything else. They had just shivered until the bed had warmed and fallen asleep, drunk with exhaustion, as soon as the bed was warm enough to do so. Young had woken this morning uncomfortably aware that he was in bed with Rush. The necessity that had driven this was disappearing. He had tried to relax in the warmth, despite his thoughts it was still unbelievably cold out there, but had failed.

 

Rush had seemed equally as restless when he had woken. They had eaten fast and by unspoken agreement made for the bridge where Young had relieved Scott of his bridge duty and Rush had taken over a console.

 

He swallowed down a flurry of jumbled thoughts that welled up. "Where are we?" he asked as Volker started to pull up screens on the console.

 

"We're moving in towards a star." Volker said. "Five..." he stopped and stared at the screen

 

"What is it?" Young asked.

 

"We have five gates in range, all unlocked." Rush said.

 

"Why?"

 

"I don't know yet." Rush snapped. "Destiny is also steering towards a suitable star to recharge herself."

 

"How long do we have on the clock?"

 

"No clock yet." Said Volker in surprise.

 

"I'm receiving some kind of signal here I think." Calvos said from the other console.

 

Rush's fingers were flicking over the console and Young turned from Calvos to watch Rush.

 

"It's a seed ship." He said. "It's damaged, but still online."

 

"What's it doing?"

 

"Exchanging and updating a list of resources. It's apparently been waiting for Destiny." Rush was scanning down the console. "The seed ships have manufacturing facilities."

 

"They can make stargates." Young agreed.

 

"Yes, among other things."

 

"So what is it making?"

 

"Apparently hull plating and decking." Rush said. "It's been mining."

 

"And we've been using up Destiny's supplies of those." Young said.

 

"It's probable that the AI is aware of the repairs we have undertaken on Destiny and is arranging a resupply now she has the facilities to undertake repairs."

 

"Facilities?"

 

"Us." Rush said shortly. "A crew."

 

"Clear panels for the dome?"

 

"Not yet. Destiny is also asking for a transfer of atmosphere. She's lost a lot with the reduction in the shields, and she doesn't have any spare, over 80% of the ship is still open to vacuum." Rush turned away from the console to look at them. "This is working to Destiny's priorities, not ours. No doubt the AI has a hierarchy of needs. On the grounds we have no way of completely understanding what is truly important to keep the ship running, I'd strongly advise that we accept her priorities, Colonel."

 

The star began to be visible in the far distance ahead of the ship, a bright spot slowly growing larger.

 

"One gate has dropped out." Volker said. "Must be in the system ahead."

 

Young pulled out his radio. "This is Young. Be aware Destiny is approaching a star to refuel." He put it back down and turned back to the bridge. "Where actually is the seed ship?"

 

"Volker." Rush's order was brief.

 

Young turned to Volker as he changed the readouts he was looking at.

 

"Upper atmosphere of a planet in this system." He said. "Apparently collecting more air." There was a pause. "Wow. I didn't realise they could do that."

 

"What's it doing?" Young asked.

 

"Well, collecting air." Volker said. "It's pretty cool."

 

In Young's peripheral vision Rush shook his head in disbelief.

 

Young sat back while they waited for Destiny to reach the star. From everything Young had seen it was a pretty typical star for Destiny to pick. Eli, Rush and Volker on different occasions had all explained Destiny's preference as regards stars. Unsurprisingly Volker's explanation had made the most sense to Young, despite the fact that Rush had been the teacher. Lecturer, professor, whatever. Eli was just too fast, Rush too clever. Young realised he didn't know if Volker had ever taught, but he had a way of explaining things in terms dumb enough to make sense to Young.

 

The star gradually loomed ahead of them. Young's fingers tightened on the arms of the chair. Young still found the trips through stars to recharge incredible, it never got old or boring, still shook him every time. The sheer terrifying power of what was surrounding them never failed to impress. The shuddering of the ship and hull was still intense, but sat in the chair he relaxed into it. Destiny, his home, was pretty incredible.

 

It made him feel slightly grateful they had fixed the hull breaches. He knew that in the star it was the shields that really protected them from the star, filtered out the worst of the star's heat, radiation and protected them from damage. Still, having solid hull between him and the power of a star, well it made him feel better. The vibration of the ship began to abate and the ride stabilised as Destiny pulled out of the star. He saw the turn in the window ahead as Destiny changed her course?

 

"Rush?" he asked without thinking, still looking out of the window.

 

"Seed ship." Rush responded.

 

"Good." Young looked away from the window and back to the bridge.

 

Volker gave Young a funny look then a quick glance to Rush who had remained hunched over his console. It looked like Volker was going to say something, but his console suddenly brightened and he turned back to it. The lights came up brightly from their minimum level and the other consoles and readouts on the bridge all came on line.

 

"Tazhbezh!" Calvos said turning to grin at them all. Young nodded at the man with a smile, hurray indeed, in whatever language.

 

"Power levels are good." Volker said. "We're as full as we've ever been."

 

Young picked up his radio.

 

"Young to all crew, we are back up to good power levels, things are going to warm up. Young to Scott, Scott can you please ask Doctor WIlliams to arrange a suitable charging schedule to get all our equipment back online. Start with military and repair equipment."

 

"Scott here, will do sir."

 

"What's next?" Young asked.

 

Rush looked up from his console. "We'll dock with the seed ship, there'll be atmosphere and water transfer and then once that's complete we'll gain access to the seed ship."

 

"Is this seed ship occupied?"

 

"It's online and talking to Destiny and according to it's sensor logs it hasn't been accessed by anyone since it left the Milky Way. It's dumping a large amount of additional information into Destiny's memory, largely about the five planets in range." There was silence as Rush started working through the information. "I think Destiny is targeting a significant resupply." He started a little as a box came up on the screen.

 

"What is it Rush?"

 

"I'm being given a list of supplies, locations on the seed ship and locations of storage on Destiny. We're being asked to undertake the manual transfer of supplies."

 

"What supplies?" Young asked.

 

"The Hull and deck plating," Rush said, "but also squingies, raw materials, other components. The seed ship's manufacturing facility is active and appears to be turning out hull plating, components and conduit rather than star gates. Lots of hull plating. Destiny appears to be asking for somewhat of a refit. Not unsurprising, the Ancients could never have expected Destiny to complete her mission without some sort of repairs and refitting and there's no way that she could have held enough spare parts to last even tens of thousands of years."

 

"Where's it getting the materials?" Young asked.

 

Volker had been silent for some time, but spoke up. "It's what we said, it's been mining, asteroids mainly, throughout the system." He scrolled through more information.

 

"How much has it got?"

 

"Lots. It's been mining for about..." Volker stopped. They waited. "It started ten days after we arrived on Destiny. Over four years."

 

Rush laughed. "Looks like Destiny has been planning to take advantage of our mobility for some time." He said.

 

Young nodded. "How long is the count down."

 

"Well that's the other interesting thing." Rush said. "The count down is twenty six days."

 

Silence again.

 

"Twenty six days." Young repeated in disbelief.

 

"I think that's what I said." Rush said acidly. "We altered Destiny's course ignoring the end of the last galaxy. The course information Destiny has plotted suggests she thinks she's too close to the first and second waves of seed ships. I suspect we'll have some long stops in the future, while she corrects that."

 

"Twenty six days to forage for food." Calvos said.

 

"Twenty six days to undertake repairs." Rush added pointedly. "Like the coolant leak and computer core."

 

"Atmosphere and water levels on the seedship are being transmitted." Volker interrupted.

 

"Where's the water come from in space?" Young asked.

 

"Clouds?" Calvos asked, then looked embarrassed. "It went in the planet's atmosphere." He added as they all looked at him. "To get the air?"

 

"Quite possibly." Rush said.

 

"Okay, so we're in range of five usable planets?" Young leaned back in the chair and

 

"Four and the one we're close to." Volker confirmed "Two aren't going to be giving us any food, one's arid, one's like Hoth. Three that look kinda like Earth, one here, two elsewhere."

 

Young looked at Rush.

 

"Gate room." Rush said before Young could .speak.

 

Young nodded. He pulled out his radio. "James this is Young."

 

"James here."

 

"I need you to take the chair on the bridge."

 

"On my way."

 

"Young to Scott."

 

"What is it Colonel?"

 

"Round up Camile, Eli, Brody and TJ and tell them we'll meet them in the gate room. Tell Eli to bring plenty of Kinos, we have four planets in range."


	15. Opportunity

They were clustered round the console, but the kino footage was clear. Young watched over Eli's shoulder as they tried one gate after the other. The gate on the arid planet opened out on to a desert, but the kino footage showed them a wide flat salt-pan of desiccated minerals.

"Air and solar radiation is good."  Brody said. "It's safe to be there."

"Mineral resources." Rush said staring at the video screen as the kino floated out across the pan.  "Evidently what Destiny finds interesting about the planet."

"How do we know that those minerals are what Destiny thinks is important." Young said, a little exasperated with Rush's assumptions.

"Well, I doubt that the seedships place stargates randomly on these planets, do they?" Rush said derisively, shooting a glance at Young.

Young shook his head and gave up. "Fine, I'll send a team to see what there is there. Bring the kino back"

The ice planet was definitely another Hoth, though not quite as cold, more arctic than the deadly cold of Hoth. More ice. Lots more ice and therefore more water. Young scheduled ice mining and the puddle hissed out.

The kino footage of the two temperate planets was more encouraging. Young nudged Rush aside a little to get a better look as the kino floated through the first gate into a temperate woodland, dense with plants, sun beams cutting down through gaps in the canopy.

"That's more like it." Eli said. "Plants and stuff."

"Yes Eli," Rush muttered. "Stuff."

"Oxygen level is higher than what we're used to." Brody said. "Temperature is good. UV radiation is low, lower than what we're used to."

They watched the kino float around the planet for another ten minutes, seeing no creature larger than a domestic cat, and that was a large crawling insect. A very large crawling insect. Young felt Eli shudder.

"Foraging party." Young said. "Next one."

Brody shut down the wormhole and they waited again while he dialled the next. Eli sent the kino through the event horizon.

The final planet was a sea of waist height plants over rolling hills. A river ran through a wide shallow valley with what looked like trees crowding around the edges. There were some sort of creatures flying through the air, but they were too far off to see. Somewhere in the distance, a group of somethings were moving towards the river.

"Much more promising." Rush said. 

"Yeah." Young agreed. "Foraging party."

The radio crackled. "Colonel, Doctor Rush, this is Volker. You might want to come back to the Bridge, we are approaching the seedship."

Young looked up from the kino screen, Rush was already turning away, moving towards the doorway. Young turned to Scott. "Set up three recon parties, one to the desert, and two to the two warm planets. Pick two crew with suit experience and get them to prep for a recon of the ice planet once we're done with the seedship. Then get a party ready for the seedship, take Greer and Brody for starters, they were on the last ship, they'll know their way round." Young turned and as fast as his knee and cane would let him strode after Rush.

By the time he got to the bridge Rush was in the chair, and James not in sight. Rush looked up a little belligerently as Young walked in, but Young shook his head and left Rush the chair. Whilst he preferred to be in command, with this sort of affair Rush probably knew more what to do than Young himself. He contented himself though by walking up onto the dais to lean on the edge of the chair and look over Rush's shoulder. Rush looked up at him, glowering, but said nothing. In the window ahead the seedship was getting larger and larger, and finally slipping below Destiny's nose.

"What's happening?" He asked Rush.

"Destiny is running an automated docking manoeuvre." Rush pulled up a holographic display showing Destiny and the seedship in real time. "Once we're firmly docked, water and atmosphere transfer will start and then after that Destiny will unlock the hatches between us."

"How long?"

"Docking will be complete in about a minute. Atmosphere and water transfer should take less than ten minutes."

Young lifted his radio. "Young to all crew. We're gonna dock with the seedship in about a minute, please hold on or sit down. Young out."

There was a long pause, Rush, Calvos and Volker watching screens, Young waiting as patiently as he could.

"Here we go." Volker called over his shoulder.

Young gripped the rail as there was a thud, more a shudder through the floor than a sound, and a brief but violent shake.

"We're docked." Calvos said. "The atmosphere and water transfer has started."

"How much water?" Young asked.

Calvos said something in ancient then looked up. "Sorry, I struggle with your measuring systems still."

"One million, three hundred and nineteen thousand litres." Rush said. "Almost the entirety of the water stored on the seedship."

"No more water rationing." Young said.

"We have almost one quarter capacity of our water reserves, based on the available undamaged storage. But no, with our current crew complement, we have more than enough water to meet any reasonable day to day needs." He flicked through screens. "I could request the seedship to retrieve more water while we are orbiting here. We could reasonably go up to half capacity."

"Possibly." Young said. "Is it likely we'll need the seedship? How long will it take us to transfer the components and materials?"

"That remains to be seen." Rush said.

xxxoooxxx

Leaning on the back of the command chair, Young watched as in the kino image the hatch to the seedship opened. The boarding party walked forward, Scott and Eli clear in the centre of the screen.

"It's nice and warm in here." That was Barnes voice from somewhere off screen.

"Yeah, but like, really creepy." Eli's voice was clear and he turned his head to look up at the kino. "And you know, last time you were on one of these there were like, little alien guys who tried to steal our power and kidnapped Colonel Telford."

Rush leaned forward to thumb the communication channel. "Stop getting distracted Eli." he snapped. "We have access to the sensors on this ship and there are no aliens, little or otherwise. Anyway, we should have let them keep Telford. They liked him better than we did."

Young snorted.

"Okay, okay!" Eli turned back to the corridor ahead.

Rush craned his neck to look back up at Young through his hair, fingers still on the console.

"Do you have to stare over my shoulder?" he demanded.

Young tried not to look amused. "You've got the chair, and I'm no use with a console." He let Rush draw his own conclusions as to where that conversation would get him. Rush evidently gave up as he turned back and pulled the kino footage up on the larger holographic display.

"Okay, we split up." Scott was saying on the seedship. "Greer, you and Brody find the manufacturing facility and where these hull pieces are. Barnes and Dr Russell, the location of the second supply storage with the squingies and whatever. Eli, you're with me."

The parties split, Eli pulling further kinos from his backpack to accompany them. Young fidgeted as he watched them, waiting for something to go wrong. Once again this seemed far too familiar, the disaster with the cold had really made an impression on him. He shuddered and Rush looked up enquiringly. Young met his eyes, but just shook his head and Rush went back to the data he was scanning.

"Colonel?" Greer's voice came over the kino feed.

Without looking at it, Rush reached out and flicked the kino feed to Greer and Brody, toggling the communications.

"Sergeant?"

Greer was staring at the kino. Behind him Brody was at a railing, looking down at the manufactory below. Young could see enormous sheets of grey hull plating suspended where stargates had hung on the previous seedship. Young moved around the chair a little to get a better look at the holo-display.

"Brody says these sheets of hull plating will need to go out in zero gravity sir, they are mighty big." He gestured towards the far end, but the kino video wasn't clear enough for Young to see into the dimly lit distance. "There's a big hatch at the far end. Brody thinks it goes out into space. He reckons we can move the panels with the shuttle."

Rush looked up at the kino footage momentarily. "That would make sense Colonel." He agreed with Greer. "Although it will mean more work for you and Lieutenant Scott unless you plan to be giving driving lessons?" Young raised an eyebrow at the sarcasm. Rush just smirked at him.

Young turned the idea over in his head. "Actually not such a bad idea," he said quietly. "We'd have to pick one crew member to train, no time for more…"

Rush ignored his musing, and went back to the communications channel. "Sergeant Greer, Mr Brody."

"Doctor Rush?"

"If you could make a count of the available hull plating we can start to plan the work we can undertake." It was worded as a question but the tone was an order.

Greer sighed. "Will do Doctor."

Young looked at the holographic display as Rush toggled it back to Eli and Scott, before examining what appeared to be a representation of the layout of the seedship and comparing two sets of data, flicking quickly from one to the other, faster than Young could even read, let alone read in Ancient. Rush toggled the communications.

"Eli, there is a small room ten metres ahead on your left. Would you and Lieutenant Scott please go and look at it for me."

Eli looked up at the kino. "Why?"

"Eli." Rush's tone held a warning note.

"Okay. We'll take a look." Eli moved away from the console he had been examining.

"Then get a move on, stop dawdling."

"Fine, fine, we're going." Eli responded, comically weary resignation in his voice.

Young watched as they walked up the corridor looking in alcoves and entryways as they went.

"Mr Wallace?" Rush's voice was sarcastic. "When you have a moment?"

Young looked away from the kino feed and at Rush, frowning. Rush's voice and expression did not match. His voice was sour and typically Rush. The look on his face however was focussed and Young thought a little concerned. He seemed to be pulling up more readings and comparing further data.

"Rush?" Young asked.

"Not now Colonel." Rush said shortly, voice unconcerned and completely not matching his intent expression.

"Okay we're in...it's actually got a hatch." They waited while Eli looked over the equipment in the room. "It looks like it's a sensor hub. Looks a lot like the one that we fixed on Destiny. I think it's probably the forward sensor hub. Cool!" Young watched as Eli examined the single console.

"Hey!" Eli and Scott both exclaimed at the same time.

Young picked up his radio. "What is it Scott?"

"The hatch just shut behind us...we didn't touch it." Scott said. On the kino feed Young could see Eli and Scott trying the hatch. "We're shut in, Colonel." Scott said. "Eli is trying to get it open again."

"Doctor Rush?" Volker asked. "Did you just...?"

"What, Mister Volker?" Rush didn't look up.

Young looked down at Rush. He was scanning down some data on the console intently.

""Rush?!" he snapped.

"Not now Colonel!" Rush's voice was sharp and he didn't look away from the data.

"What the hell are you playing at?" He demanded.

Rush ignored him in favour of rapidly tapping at the console.

Young tried again. "Rush!"

Rush toggled the radio on again. "Leave the door alone Eli." Rush's voice brooked no argument.

"What's going on?" Eli asked, looking up at the kino.

"There's a hull breach in the corridor ahead of you." Volker said suddenly from the forward console. "The seed ship's shields fluctuated. I don't think the door will open till the shields stabilise."

Young waited, annoyed.

"I've increased the shield strength in that area." Volker said finally.

"Hey," Eli's voice floated up from the kino feed, "the door just opened."

"Must be some sort of security measure." Scott said, staring at the door control.

Young wouldn't have spotted the look on Rush's face unless he had been standing next to him and looking directly at him. Rush glanced up and caught Young's eye. There was a hint of challenge there.

"Yeah," Young said into the radio, "a security feature."

 

Young sat at his desk considering the information that had been made available in the seven hours since they had dropped out of FTL. Destiny was warming up quickly, even his unreliably heated quarters. He had put the blanket from round his shoulders back on the bed when he'd returned three hours ago. Morale was definitely high and the news of a long lay over with shore leave was fuelling the general good mood. There had been a festive atmosphere in the mess hall when he had stopped in for dinner.

Twenty six days was too good an opportunity to miss. Rush's assertion that Destiny's core programming must have allowed for intermittent longer foraging expeditions made sense. It was clear that the hydroponics in the dome couldn't have completely fed a crew the size that Destiny was built for, just provided fresh fruit and vegetables on a daily basis.

Additionally there was no way that the Ancients would have planned a journey of this distance and magnitude without the ability to repair, replace and create. The Ancients must have had some prearranged plan to renew and resupply the ship, the crew, and everything that they needed.

The crafts and engineering groups had already got an " _If you see it we want it_ " list taped up in the canteen and Young was going to encourage people on their designated periods planetside to feel free to acquire materials and craft things. The socks had been a massive success, Rush's chess set was one of the few games sets they had, and he was pretty certain crew members could come up with some more luxuries and entertainments, even if it was just quoits or something.

He was contemplating the possibilities of more new clothes when Camile walked through his open door.

"How are you?" Camile sat down on the spare chair in his quarters.

"Fine." He said. "Much better now I'm warmer. You?"

"Likewise."

He closed the laptop on his desk. "You made the interim briefing to Homeworld Command?"

She nodded. "They're pleased we're back out of FTL and all powered up and there's a lot of curiosity in the science team about the implications of Destiny's repair schedule."

Young gave a wry grin. "Figures."

"General O'Neill is asking for you to go back and brief him properly on the current situation including the crew status and Destiny herself."

"Also figures." He leaned back in his chair. "I need you to draft a rota for the foraging parties on the planets. There's already a mining rota for Hoth two and Tatouine." He told her. Once again Eli had named the planets and it had stuck. "Rush has it, although he's not on it. I need a working party and R&R rota for Down Below, Thick Woods and Big River." Greer had got in there and quickly named the three temperate planets before Eli could think up any more names. "Three days and three nights planetside. Last half day and night are R&R."

Camile nodded making a note in chalk on a piece of metal sheet, paper now too precious to waste on rough notes. "How many crew do you want held back?"

"Keep a third of the crew on ship at any time. Keep enough military on each trip in case of emergencies, circulate TJ and Inman and the other experts between Down Below, Thick Woods and Big River to direct harvesting. Keep partners together where practical, we're including R and R here, you've got a better handle on those dynamics than I have. I want it productive but we all need this break, it's been a tough few weeks. Only other criteria is I want to be on the same schedule as Rush."

Camile looked up from her notes abruptly and frowned. "You still don't trust him?" She asked a little sharply, shifting in the chair in his quarters.

Young shrugged. "Something like that."

Camile looked at him thoughtfully. "Everett, I can't let you and Rush escalate to the point you did before."

"Trust me Camile." He said. "This is about Rush and I not having to worry about what the other is doing when the other is away."

She was still giving him a slightly distrustful look. Young took a deep breath. "Camile. I can't tell you anything we haven't already talked about. Rush and I are good. We are tolerating each other quite well these days. We've actually managed to be in the same room together without wanting to kill each other on quite a regular basis. We'll be in a group of other crew, what other chaperones do you think we need?"

Camile shifted her weight again then nodded. "You're right."  She stood. "Fine. I'll get on with it."

She stood and walked out. Young sat back in the chair, wondering why he had impulsively scheduled himself with Rush. He almost called out to Camile, to change his mind, but having defended his decision to her he could not really back down now. Not without Camile starting to doubt his motives. Damn, he would have to live with the decision. He went back to the water supplies report that the supplies team had provided earlier and applied himself to the decision on whether he could completely lift the water rationing based on the projections and estimates they had provided.

xxxoooxxx

Camile took all of two hours to come up with a plan. Of the four planets Camile's plan scheduled Young, and Rush, on the most temperate of the three. They had three of the three day shifts, actually less than most of the crew, to allow for Rush to coordinate a significant amount of the repairs and for Young to pilot the shuttle to move hull plates into place. He checked it again and signed it off.

Plan in place it was time to go back and make his briefing.

"The geeks are all over this one." General O'Neill said, closing a folder on the desk in front of him and looking up. "Apparently the idea of Destiny being able to react to you being there and schedule interaction with you and the seedship is getting them all hot under the collar."

Young nodded. "Are we likely to be getting visitations?"

"I'm pretty certain that will be part of the plan, though the discussions haven't got that far yet." O'Neill leaned back in his chair. "I'll be surprised if you don't have them there in the next day or so. I've scheduled you a full briefing for ten days time. That should give you and all the geeks at both ends enough time to establish a full picture of what's going on and still two weeks for any follow up."

Young nodded again. "I'll make sure I'm fully briefed by the science team." He shifted to the other foot. "I've got three days on a planet to fit in before that."

O'Neill grinned. "Have fun Everett, not often you get to take it easy."

"From what I hear it'll be hard work," he admitted, "but it's nice to get off the ship."

O'Neill stood, walked round the desk and clapped him on the shoulder. "Enjoy yourself." He advised Young.

The meeting was evidently over.

"I will sir." Young assured him and left.

xxxoooxxx

Rush sat in the Observation Lounge, chess set in front of him, playing out a solitary game. The Lounge was silent, it was four in the morning and most of the crew were in their beds. In their own beds. Safe and warm. Alone.

Or maybe not. He suspected that there were several who had taken advantage of the previous week's adversity to cement alliances and relationships. There was no reason for Rush himself  to be anywhere tonight. There was no expectation on him, no pain driving him, no one requesting him.

Young had called a briefing as soon as he had returned from Earth. The briefing had gone over the mining plans, repair schedule and foraging schedule in tortuous detail, planning man hours, facilities and storage space down to the smallest factor to force the maximum results from the available time and resources.

Young had left the briefing with only a single admonition to Rush that he was expected to take his quota of shore leave. Rush had resisted the urge to ask whether Young was going to make good on his former threat of dragging Rush through the stargate by his collar if he chose not to comply with the order. He had replaced the question with a scowl. Young hadn't said anything, just smiled and him and ruffled his hair with a laugh, making Rush deepen his scowl and duck away, looking to see if there was anyone else in the room. But there was no one there except them and Young had walked away.

Rush stared at the board, wondering what move his opponent would make next and realising that even though his opponent was himself, he had no idea what move to make next. He sighed, and moved a pawn at random.

xxxoooxxx

Insomnia was a bitch. Young had managed about two hours of restless sleep before his brain had rebelled and he had lain sleepless for an hour before giving up and wandering off to find a cup of tea. The messhall was deserted as was to be expected at this time of night, but Becker had, as always, left hot water and the current dried plant matter for tea available. Young wandered in and made a cup of tea in one of the strangely unbreakable Ancient cups from the giant kitchen. This tea smelled new, slightly spicy and had a yellowish hue to the resulting brew. He was too restless to sit, so cup in hand he wandered out to see if anyone was awake.

He exchanged a couple of words with an equally insomniac Chloe who was sat in the core room, darning socks and running some sort of programme on the console in front of her. He was not surprised she was awake, Scott was on a bridge shift. He bid her good night and moved on.

Young stood silently in the doorway of the observation lounge, just out of sight. Rush sat alone at the table, playing a solitary game of chess. Move after slow move, the moves became slower, and slower, and slower until Rush was sat there staring vaguely at the board. Young could hear the deep sigh Rush gave all the way from his position in the doorway. He had the urge to go in and offer him a game, or tell him to get some sleep. God knows they were both always short on sleep. Rush would not want his company though and he did not feel like he could face a conflict with Rush. Not at this time of the morning anyway.

Rush's head lifted and he stared across the room, his face clear in profile and for a moment his face was the picture of sadness. Solitary chess suddenly seemed so wretched. Young's stomach gave a lurch and his feet almost took an involuntary step forward, before he tensed and stopped himself. That was ridiculous, the last thing Rush would want was him intruding on his misery. Rush was nothing if not a private person.

He watched as Rush sighed again, looked down at the board and made a desultory move, before staring at the board and going to pack away the pieces. Maybe he should offer. Maybe…Young shook his head. This was foolish, standing here watching Rush. His tea was cold and he should be in bed. He walked quietly away.

 


	16. New planet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Young returns a favour

Rush stared at the screen. he watched the seed ship data scroll across the screen. It raised some interesting ideas, images of systems and equations turning in his mind, but he was tired. He hadn't slept well since Destiny had refuelled and returned to normal temperatures in the living areas. Too much to think about. He needed some time alone to think and work through what was in his mind. Too much data, the seedship, the repair schedule for the hull and the cold area, and what the fuck he was going to do about Young. He flexed his hands, they were still aching despite the fact the ship was warm again. He looked down at the flaking reddened skin. Christ he just needed a break.

Eli, Chloe and Volker were chattering about something at another console and on the other side of the room Brody was reading something from a console to Park, who was commenting and correcting the statements he was making.

The console swam in front of his eyes. Rush tried to tune them out to focus on the data. He rubbed his temple with the heel of his hand, he couldn't concentrate. He couldn't _cope_ with this. There was too much noise, too much movement, too many _people._

"Will you lot just shut up!" It exploded out of him before he even realised the words were forming themselves. He slammed his hands down on the console and rounded on them finger stabbing out pointing. "Just shut up! I can't think with you all chattering on endlessly!"

They stared at him shocked and silent. Rush glared at them.

"Are you okay?" Eli asked nervously.

"No, I'm not fucking ‘okay' Eli, I'm not fucking okay at all. What do I have to do to get some fucking peace and quiet round here?" Rush glared.

The science team did not move. Rush pushed away from the console and stormed out.

 xxxoooxxx

Eli tapped at the door frame. Young looked up from the desk.

"Oh hey."  Eli said awkwardly. "Um…"

Young put the pen down. "What is it Eli?"

"Doctor Rush is, uh, acting kinda stressed and I don't know why."

"Why are you telling me?" Young stomach was turning over, what had Eli seen? What did he know?

"Cause he won't listen to me about anything like that and…" Eli shifted uncomfortably. "He kinda, well he was hanging around with you when it was cold. Like I saw you were playing chess together in the mess? I thought you were…talking?" Eli stepped into the room. "He seems pretty pissed off with all of us, but he's not yelled at you for ages." Eli looked pleading.

Young looked at him. "What happened?"

"We were all working in the core room. Me, Brody, Volker and Park ‘cause Calvos has the bridge shift. Rush was in there, he looked kind of tired but we all got working. Then like half an hour later he suddenly starts yelling at us and then leaves in a huff."

"Seems pretty standard for Rush." Young said. Eli frowned and Young relented. "I'll have a word."

 xxxoooxxx

Young gave it a couple of hours, had lunch and waited to see if Rush reappeared before he went looking. The last thing he was going to do was appear to be overly concerned. He took a leisurely wander around the inhabited area of the ship.

"Rush?"

Young found Rush in the small conference room where they had planned the expedition in to Destiny's interior that had resulted in Rush being half frozen. Young stopped at the entryway leaning against the bulkhead, one hand in his pocket, the other resting on his cane. Bent over his laptop with a far away concentration across his face, Rush didn't hear him call his name.

Rush looked up from where he was working at the console. "I'm a little busy Colonel." Rush grated out.

"Eli mentioned you'd walked out on the science team earlier."

Rush glared at him. "I was trying to work." He snapped. "They were not."

Young gave him a long look. "Are you okay?"

"Yes, I'm fine. Now, let me work." Rush deliberately looked back down at the console in front of him.

Young considered his options, then pressed the issue. "I want to make sure you were alright, we've all had a tough time the last week or so."

Rush's response was crisp. "Yes, Colonel I'm absolutely fine. I just have a lot of work to do and very little time to do it in." He sighed again tiredly then appeared to steel himself. "Now if you'll leave me alone I'm busy." He said a little belligerently.

Young looked at him, contemplating his options. Rush stared back like he was waiting for an argument.

Young took a step back unfolding his arms. "A lot of work." He said quietly. "I'll let you get on then." He walked away.

 xxxoooxxx

The rest of the afternoon was quiet. Young stopped at the Bridge. The program to provide more training and back up to the limited command staff had Brody in the chair. He was happy managing the bridge and the command data outputs at the chair but seemed bored that nothing really required his attention.

He spent some time stretching and jogging, testing out the strength and control in his knee. He was careful, very careful and stopped as soon as it began to twinge, going back to his quarters with his cane in his hand. He rested on his bed, reading through the latest reports from the exploratory groups on the planets.

Rush still had not appeared at dinner. Young sat with Scott, Greer and Brody and Volker and discussed the planets and the proposed mining on Hoth 2 and Tatouine. The reports from the temperate planets had come back clear and he was about to sign off on the shore  leave and foraging schedule. That would make the crew very happy.

The work related conversation segued into a game of poker, which Young declined to join in but watched for an hour for want of anything better to do, then was distracted by Airman Chang's reading of a new short story he had written. It was pretty good, but Young thought his audience would have been equally as avid however terrible it had been, such was the desperation for new entertainment. It wasn't bad though even if Young wasn't usually a fan of horror stories, and a pleasant enough way to pass the evening.

 

"Late night chess?" Young asked from the entrance of the observation lounge.

Rush's shoulders tensed, then his head came up slowly to look at Young. Damn the man was uptight. Young walked up to him. Rush's expression was flat and cold, but he looked tired. Young considered giving up and walking away, but there was something in Rush's posture and the set of his shoulders that seemed to belie the aggressive expression.

Maybe he was just getting better at reading the man. Rush had a very effective set of impenetrable expressions, but his body language, that seemed to speak volumes. All Young needed to do was learn to read.

He walked over, sat down opposite Rush and looked at the game. Rush's expression hadn't changed and he said nothing to Young, as if he was waiting for something. Young reached out and moved a piece. He was going to lose, almost certainly, it looked like Rush should be able to checkmate him in about five moves, but that wasn't the point. Rush stared at him then silently looked down at the board.

They played in silence, the game stringing out longer than Young had expected. Rush didn't make eye contact until the end of the game when he finally beat Young. He looked at Young, impassive as ever, lifting a hand to push the hair out his face, where it caught against his beard. Young shrugged, then set up the board again, watching Rush as he did so and catching the slight movement as the tension went out of Rush's shoulders.

Even as exhausted as he looked, Rush was good. Young lost another couple of games before he finally looked at his watch. He looked up at Rush who was staring at him. "Two thirty." He said. "Hey, you look as tired as I feel, Rush." Rush sighed. Young pursued his pips, paused then spoke. "We both ought to find our beds."

Rush took a couple of moments to react to his statement, then stood. "Yeah." It was the first word he had said since Young had arrived.

Young watched as Rush packed up the game, stood, then practically stumbled out of the hatch, before he finally left the room. He looked after Rush for a long moment before standing, a thoughtful look on his face.

 xxxoooxxx

Rush was cold. The bed retained the chill of the air longer when he was its only occupant. He tossed, turned over and shifted the covers, pulling them closer around him and drifted in and out of a fitful doze. He woke as the door opened, dopey and slow with lack of sleep, trying to place the noises and movement. There was a sudden draft of cold air as the covers were lifted and a body slid into the bed next to him.

"What?" He blinked in the semi-dark.

"Returning a favour." Young murmured, wrapping round him. "You don't seem to be managing not enough sleep as well as usual. Get some damn sleep Rush."

Still dopey, Rush let Young pull him in and settle him into his chest. He felt the covers pulled in tight around them. Warm, he was warm. He felt arms wrapped round him, could feel the movement of Young's breathing where his head was resting on his chest. Rush let himself relax with a sigh. He didn't expect sleep to arrive quickly, but it did.

 

He woke slowly from a heavy sleep, limbs intertwined with Young's, warm and swaddled tightly in the bedclothes. As he shifted trying to untangle his free leg from a fold of the bedclothes, Young woke.

"Morning." Young said.

Rush felt him shift as he pulled his arm out from under the covers to look at his watch.

"Half seven. I better shift." He scrubbed at the mess of his curls, dishevelled from sleep.

Rush agreed with an "mmm-hmm" and let Young untangle himself.

Young looked as if he was going to say something, but Rush looked at him silently from where he lay in the bed. Young remained blessedly quiet while he dragged on pants, shoes and jacket, just asking "You okay?" before he left and accepting a nod in response. Rush laid back on the bed and stared at the ceiling. This was getting out of hand. He stood, had a quick wash with a damp cloth, dragged his comb through his hair and beard and stared at himself in the mirror.

Young's company, his presence was pleasant. His body's warmth, the closeness in his bed was reassuring and helped him sleep. It was _why_ he found it comforting, _why_ Young's physical presence reassured him, that was what disquieted Rush. The whole situation filled him with a deep unease. He needed time to think, space to withdraw from this. Maybe when Young was on shore leave he'd have the space he needed to get a handle on how to deal with this. Until then, well, he would just have to manage.

 xxxoooxxx

Young left quickly, partly to be out of Rush's quarters before the corridors got busier, partly as he thought Rush would probably not take well to company now he was awake. He nipped into his quarters to make himself a little more presentable. What he really needed was a wooden comb like Rush's, he thought as he combed his unruly curls with an increasingly toothless comb made for much finer hair. He put it down, stared into the mirror for a moment, then before he could start over-thinking anything, made for the mess hall to locate breakfast.

As Young had expected, the scientists from the SGC arrived that day shortly after he had finished his breakfast. Young had a quick chat with them before having them shown to where Rush was working in the core room. According to Airman Dunning, Rush had given them about five minutes of his time before palming them off on Brody and Eli.

Volker was on the first round of shore leave, but Brody and Eli had a party of capable crew and were fixing all of the repairable damage and breaches between the entry to the seedship and the accessible storage area. The plan was to secure the route and expand the usable space before moving the supplies across using any crew available rather than needing to worry about potential dangers.

The scientists spent half a day tolerating this, then had come back up to the inhabited area. Failing to find Rush they sent their leader to Young. Just great, Dr Gutierrez was another one of the SGC's golden kids, young, smart, egotistical and damn irritating. At least the older ones had more excuse for ego.

Young was busy watching the video display as Scott moved the shuttle from the manufactory bay doors to the largest hull breach they were aiming to fix, one directly on the route to the cold zone.

"Colonel Young?" Gutierrez' voice had a slightly peremptory note that grated on Young's nerves.

"One moment." Young watched as the shuttle manoeuvred slowly then Scott engaged the docking magnets on the feet. With a clunk he could hear through the communications, the shuttle clamped to a flat section of hull.

He toggled the communications to speak. "Nice job Lieutenant, I think you're good. I'll take my dry run after lunch. Get yourself back onboard." He flipped the switch and turned to the scientist, "Dr Gutierrez, how can I help you?"

The scientist looked irritated. "Your science team appear to be blocking us." He said with a frown.

"I doubt that." Young said. "My understanding is that they are undertaking much needed repairs to the ship as per my orders."

The scientist shifted from one foot to the other. "I'm not disputing your orders Colonel, but I'm just not sure how Doctor Rush has transmitted them to the science team."

 _Manipulative little shit_ thought Young _unfortunately son the premise you're working on is a little out of date. At least partly. But I'd bet a dime to a dollar you've been speaking to David._

He wasn't entirely sure what project Rush was currently working on, but he could temporise. "Rush, this is Young. I've got Doctor Gutierrez here with a query. I'm assuming you're still busy with the project plan for the cold area?"

There was a pause then the radio crackled.

"I'm in the middle of checking the sensor readings surrounding the cold area for the hull fix, Colonel. Is this important?"

"Not really," Young looked at Gutierrez as he spoke, "that's the priority, keep on with what you're doing. I'll get Eli to help Dr Gutierrez and leave Brody to coordinate the repairs.

"What does Gutierrez want?"

Young looked at Gutierrez.

"Some one to show us round the seedship." Gutierrez said promptly.

"Send Greer as well." Rush advised. "He's as familiar with the layout as anyone else."

And had a low tolerance for bullshit.

"Good idea. Young out." Young turned to Gutierrez. "I'm sorry Doctor, but Rush and I agreed our priorities on this project."

Gutierrez gave him a dark look but did not challenge his statement.

"We have twenty six days total for foraging, moving everything possibly usable off the seedship and all the external repairs which can't be done in FTL Doctor." Young said. "My priority is the crew and the ship. I'm sorry if this slows you down, but if we starve or Destiny explodes, you're not gonna be coming out here anyway."

Unobtrusively Young let his finger off the send button on the radio. He knew every crew member who currently had a radio, which meant that at least Camile, Greer, Rush, TJ, Scott and the science team had heard the entire discussion. Rush must be rubbing off on him. Young sent Gutierrez back and radioed Eli and Greer to tell them to babysit the SGC scientists then James to order her to cover the bridge. He went to find Rush, lunch and a test flight in that order.

 xxxoooxxx

"What are you actually working on?" He asked Rush as he walked into the core room. Rush still looked drawn and there were dark circles under his eyes.

"Actually exactly what I told you." Rush snapped. "Is the cold area really the priority?"

Young snorted. "It's yours and Eli's priority."

Rush tilted his head. "But not yours."

Young hooked his thumbs in his pockets. "You know what I want done by the time we leave." He said reasonably. "You get it done I don't care what order you get it done in." Rush gave him a long look, but Young continued. "I haven't disagreed about the cold area work, but our engineering priority on the layover has to be the hull repairs, and anything else that requires us to be out of FTL."

"I'm perfectly aware of all of that." Rush said heatedly.

Young held up his hand to forestall a torrent. "I'm listening to you Rush. I know that the cold area is important, the power loss, the computer core and access to the other infirmary, but…" Rush opened his mouth to talk and Young lifted his hand again, "…but we have to do everything that needs us stationary or involves the seedship in the next 24 days."

"Maybe not." Rush said, surprising Young. "I've been checking the seedship. It's holding power, it's the control systems for the FTL that are the most damaged but some of the FTL modules are still intact. I think that though the seedship is damaged, I can slave it's systems to Destiny's and make a parallel jump like we did with Telford and the Ursini."

 "Won't that have power issues for Destiny?"

Rush shook his head. "No, no, as I said, the seedship is holding power, it's FTL control systems are damaged but half of the FTL modules are still operational. Destiny can manage the control issues, and with the combined power output of both ships, my calculations prove the available FTL modules are sufficient to power both ships."

Young stared at him. "I'll need someone to check your calculations…"

"Yes, yes…"

"Chloe and Eli can check the math…"

"Yes, yes…"

"It's a good plan." He interrupted quietly "See if it will work, get Chloe and Eli to check the math. If you can confirm it in a week we can concentrate on foraging and repairs."

 xxxoooxxx

The SGC science team appeared about an hour later with an animatedly talking Eli. Rush tolerated their presence in the core room for just long enough to send the data he required to the console in the small conference room and retreated there. He worked through in the blessed silence until he had run out of data and sat back in the chair steeling himself to go back to the twittering horde in the core room. He was feeling a little hungry, maybe he should stop by the mess hall.

He looked down at the console and realised from the display that it was gone eleven. No wonder he was hungry but it was too late to do anything about it. He sighed and walked out. Time for bed and to try to sleep for a few hours. Tomorrow was his first scheduled shore leave. He was torn between irritation at leaving his work and time out. Time completely out of all of this. He reached his quarters, stripped and slid into bed, pulling the covers tightly round him. Time now to try and get some sleep.

 xxxoooxxx

The group met up in the gateroom at the scheduled time. Young looked around, wondering if Rush would actually turn up, or whether he would have to send someone to get him. Last time that had been particularly ineffective. He waited as the rest of the group assigned to this slot arrived. Last of all was Rush, bag in hand, no laptop this time, wearing a slightly oversized fatigue jacket and borrowed boots with the black BDU pants and undershirt that Young had found for him all those months ago. The pants were still baggy and slung low around his hips. He seriously needed to find Rush a belt. Maybe there would be some sort of fibre that could be braided into a rope belt. Maybe there was some sort of fibre that could be braided into rope full stop, he mused, still looking at Rush. They were very short on rope. Rope _and_ string.

Rush caught sight of him and stopped. Their eyes met, Rush frowned, the frown swiftly deepening into a scowl. Time stopped, reality hung in the air for a second.

Then Young shifted from one foot to the other, breaking the moment. Rush's lip twitched, his eyes narrowed and he spun and strode out.

 xxxoooxxx

Rush walked out and kept walking, three corridors, three turns until he was in a room he knew was practically never used. He could not back out of this without embarrassing himself. There was no way he could see to refuse to go at this late stage. A little more notice and he could have faked some sort of emergency with the ship, but now…No doubt Young had planned it this way although Rush had no idea why. Rush seemed to spend his whole time at the moment asking himself questions that started ‘why'. Young evidently did not trust him, but apparently the man still wanted to be in the same place as him and was more than willing to arrange matters to endure it.

Their previous close encounters had all been the result of necessity, when had choice become a factor? It seemed a recent phenomenon. He reached out, tapped a console and checked the time. He had been gone about five minutes, much longer and Young or TJ would no doubt be sending someone to find him. He sighed and left the room, pausing at the science team's storage cubby to pick up a roll of leather that held his carving tools, he should have remembered anyway. Still annoyed he made his way back to the gateroom.

The assembled group, all eleven of them, were staring at him as he walked back in.

"I forgot something," he said shortly, gesturing with the leather bundle in his hand. "Are we ready?"

Young gave him a suspicious look but turned and nodded to Eli who was standing at the gate controls, flanked by Camile and Scott. Rush paused a moment, then walked to stand next to Young.

"You okay?"  Young's voice was low and sounded concerned.

"Fine." Rush said sharply, but pitching his voice quietly.

The wormhole flew out from the gate with the familiar splash of watery light then settled.

"I wasn't sure you'd come when you walked off."

"You didn't warn me you were…" Rush stopped.

It wasn't as if he should expect a warning. Why would he need a warning. Around them the group hefted bags and crates and stepped forward.

"Shall we?" Rush asked, leaving the previous conversation for dead.

Young stepped forward towards the gate and with a frustrated frown Rush flanked him, following him through the gate.


	17. Planetary interlude

Rush sat turning the netting shuttle in his hands, rubbing it down with a small piece of sandstone, the closest thing he could find to sandpaper. He had known what Calvos was talking about as soon as he had started to talk, had seen them used on the docks as a boy. The wood would do well enough for now, but in the long term bone would last longer. Working by touch alone he sanded away the marks from the knife while his eyes were on the small group on the other side of the camp site. Young was sat deep in discussion with Inman and Becker, who were cooking, the conversation no doubt about supplies. 

They had been here precisely thirteen hours, most of which time they had been harvesting a plant which would apparently provide carbohydrates. He was torn between his view of doing such manual work as a complete waste of his expert time, and the feeling of being able to lose himself a little in the hard physical effort in the sun and the open air. The thinking time had actually been welcome, allowing serious consideration of the best way to address a couple of programming problems.

The one thing he had not been able to address in the thirteen hours thinking time was Young. No-one had broached the topic of who was bunking with whom yet, although it was clear that there were sufficient shelters that they would be sharing in pairs. Young had already left his pack in one of the shelters, the one at the far end, Rush had seen him do it. Rush himself had simply left his kit by a cut log that was being used for a seat and walked out to the area that they were harvesting. He had joined the rest of the working party, pushing aside thoughts of those sorts of logistics from his mind as far as possible, until inexorably they had emerged to ambush him as Young's voice had lifted behind him giving an order.

Camile had undertaken the shore leave schedule. However, Camile would never voluntarily schedule Young and Rush together for something like this, which meant that Young had requested they be scheduled together. Young _had asked_ for this, must have. He wondered what the conversation between Camile and Young had consisted of. It cannot have been a comfortable conversation at all for Young. He wondered what excuses Young had given. There must have been excuses.

The last few people came up from washing sweat and dirt off in the river, disturbing the conversation on the other side of the clearing. Young stood and for a moment their eyes met, before Young ducked his head then made for where Brody, Barnes and Calvos were now taking a seat by one of the shelters. Rush shook his head irritatedly, flicked his still damp hair out of his face and went back to the work at hand.

 xxxoooxxx 

Young stood staring up at the stars. A fresh breeze had whipped up, but he wasn't ready to get back under cover yet. He missed the sky and the feeling of freedom that came with having nothing above your head but air was slightly intoxicating. He looked back at where the shelters had been set up round the fire. He'd deposited his gear in one of the shelters but wasn't sure how the others had been shared out. Greer had taken his place on guard, sat staring out into the dark, kino remote in hand, gun across his knees.

He shifted from foot to foot. He had been slightly concerned about how his knee would hold up to the work, but there was not a lot of walking required here, and with a little care he had managed fine, just a little discomfort as he turned or shifted without thinking. He wandered back and pushed open the curtain on the shelter, stooping to enter the low doorway. Familiar dark eyes stared out at him. He stopped.

"Hi." He said uncertainly, crouching in the doorway.

Rush was lying on the bed, his face cast in strange flickering shadows by the flames dancing from the makeshift animal fat lamp on a flat rock by the head of the pallet.

"Better the devil you know." Rush muttered. "Brody offered. I declined."

He found himself strangely pleased. "Where's Brody then?"

"In with Greer." Rush said. "Or will be. Calvos ended up with Barnes, because..." Rush chuckled, "Becker and Inman are in together."

Young laughed quietly. "They've been working together a lot."

Young had added more hay over the branches that formed the makeshift pallet made by the first team who had arrived here, the hay from previous occupants squashed into the base. Since then Rush had evidently spread a blanket over the thick layer of hay and a couple more over the top, folded back a little to show a pillow apparently made of more hay stuffed in a fourth folded blanket. He lay on top of the blankets on one side of the pallet, propped up on his arm. Left hand side, Young realised. In the cold aboard ship, Young had slept on the right hand side of the bed, always did, Rush had left his usual space free. Strange how things became habit.

"We need to talk." Rush said changing the subject suddenly. "There's...things to talk about." His voice was barely above a whisper.

"Talk?" Young was surprised. "You never talk."

"Yes, well, I think we need to talk now, Colonel." The last word, while spoken equally as quietly as the rest of his statement, was bitten off sharply.

"What about?" Young crouched in the doorway, letting the blanket door drop behind him.

"Us, this."

Young looked at Rush, who seemed to be holding his face carefully impassive in the flickering light. "Okay. Shoot."

"Why are we doing this?" Rush asked gesturing at the bed.

Young looked at him, Rush looked back up at him, face almost expressionless except a hint of something that might be trepidation, caution or maybe fear. There was a long silence between them before Young finally gave in and spoke.

"I don't know about you, but I'm doing this because...." he paused, rolling the thought around his head. He was uncertain he wished to make any admissions to Rush, to risk letting on anything that Rush could subsequently use against him. He sighed and moved forward to kneeling on the edge of the bed. "I'm doing this because I need some company." He said finally, deciding he didn't have so much to lose. Rush would have to make admissions of his own to use anything Young said, something Young did not think would happen. "I need to have someone about sometimes and you're warm and apparently lonely too." He sat on the pallet, turning to face Rush again hearing hay and branches crackle a little underneath him. Young sighed. "And neither of us has anywhere else to go or anyone else to go to."

"You could be spending your time with Lieutenant Johansen." Rush pointed out.

Young froze angrily, ready to fire a response back, then sighed. "No," he said quietly, "I don't think I can."

Rush stared at him for a few seconds. He seemed to do that a lot. "Maybe not." Rush said finally. "Are you comfortable with this?"

"Hey," Young said, "you haven't told me what you're getting out of this. You're doing it again."

"What?" snapped Rush.

"Letting other people do the talking and not letting anything on yourself." Young shifted his weight and lay down on his side, putting himself closer to Rush, looking up at him from the blankets. "So come on then, tell me, what are you getting out of this?" He demanded.

Rush scowled.

"No," Young insisted angrily, "talk, Rush."

Rush looked away, but spoke anyway. "Same as you, I...I'm alone here, and you're company. There's no-one else and we're jest stupid enough to trust each other with this secret after all we've been through wi' each other." He laughed sourly. "We've both seen the worst the other can do."

Young's answering laugh was equally as harsh. "And when we're back on Destiny?" Young continued, aware he was pushing the issue.

"You're like a dog with a bone." Rush growled.

"I'm fed up with us doing this and swinging from being comfortable to stressed out to guilty and round through it all again." Despite the whisper there was a snap to Young's tone. "And you," he punctuated his statement with a stab of a pointing finger at Rush, "are as much at fault as I am. You just refuse to talk about it."

"I seem to remember I'm the one who started this conversation." Rush fired back at him, voice sharp, but his free arm came up to fold across his cheset defensively.

"Only cause you wanted to find out what I was thinking, not because you actually had any intention of talking yourself." Young replied.

Rush snorted. "Fine, well, I suspect that if one or the other of us has a truly shite day then the other will find they have company won't they?"

"Fine." Young echoed. He moved up the bed and started to shed his outer clothes. Rush watched him silently. Young slid in between the blankets. "Come on, get in."

He watched as Rush rolled onto his back and shed his pants, then hauled his outer t-shirt over his head. Rush slid into bed and lay down facing away from Young. Young pulled the covers up and spooned up behind Rush. Rush sighed then chuckled nastily.

"What?" Young asked him.

"Keep your friends close and your enemies closer." Rush said.

Young laughed. "This may be taking that a little far."

Rush shifted and Young wrapped his arm loosely round Rush's waist. Rush sighed and shifted his head so it was pillowed on his arm. They settled into the pallet, the smell of hay and sap wreathing up through the blanket.

"Warm." Rush muttered, slightly sleepily.

"Yeah."

And then there was silence.

 xxxoooxxx 

Dawn woke him, shafts of light playing through the gaps at the edge of the curtain door. Young listened carefully but there was no noise of people yet from outside. It must still be very early, the only sounds from outside were the distant rumbles from the herd beasts, the low pitched bellows carrying miles, and the scratchy crackle of the bird equivalents here, really more like the cross between a bat and a lizard. He drew his attention back to the more immediate.

Rush was tucked into Young's arms, his back flush against the curve of Young's body and Young's face was nestled into the back of Rush's neck, buried in Rush's hair. Rush was asleep still, Young could feel his breathing soft and regular. Rush smelled of sweat and the smell of the buckwheat plants, like the camomile tea Emily drank when she couldn't sleep. Young's fingers were flat against Rush's stomach and he could feel the flat plaque of the scar where Rush was stabbed under one hand. His other arm was under Rush's head, pillowed on his bicep, arm folded down over Rush's shoulder to cup his chest.

Young moved and Rush stiffened then settled again. Carefully he shifted the arm under Rush's head and Rush moved restlessly again. He pulled his arm back and with a grumbling noise Rush rolled. As Rush rolled Young slid his arms back. Rush's hand reached out sleepily to rest on Young's chest. Young sighed and waited for a while until Rush settled again before sliding backwards and slipping off the pallet. He pulled on his pants and left the shelter.

He had been wrong, Becker and Calvos were at the fire, Calvos building the fire up and Becker quietly stirring something in a plastic bowl. They looked up as he exited the shelter and he walked over.

"Morning." He said quietly. "Anything I can do?"

"Peel those?" Becker gestured at a heap of some green vegetables, or maybe fruits piled on a empty backpack on the floor.

Young sat down and pitched into helping with breakfast.

 

Despite the hard physical work, three days on this planet was going to be a real break. Stripped to the waist in the bright sunshine, swinging Brody's makeshift sickles he harvested plants that apparently provided a seed Inman claimed was like buckwheat. Even Barnes was down to her bra and Young's eyes slipped sideways to where Rush was down to the black undershirt Young had given him. The sunlight was warm, but he'd been assured he was much less likely to get sunburned on this planet, and it seemed to be true. He wasn't going to complain. Sweat was trickling down his back though.

"Calvos!" Young called to the man who looked like he was flagging a little. Calvos looked over at him, surprised. "Go get some water Cal, we're all sweating like crazy here."

The man grinned, and trotted off. Something had happened to him since he had come here, Young knew. Calvos had loosened up a little. He'd noticed Barnes calling him Cal at breakfast that morning, and that Greer, Brody and the others had picked up on it already. When they had arrived Calvos had been nervous, isolated and anxious but in the space of a day and a night he'd become part of the group. Young thought it was probably Barnes' work, but whatever it was, he was now more relaxed in the presence of the others, laughing with Becker, exchanging a few words with Brody and smiling at everyone. He seemed to finally be settling in and becoming part of the crew.

The water revived him and the others and they got in another three hours work before Young called a halt. This planet had a twenty six and a half hour day, a little long, putting them just out of sync with Destiny.

"What's cooking?" he asked Inman as they stood, getting ready to go back to the camp.

"Darren said it was stew and biscuits." She grinned, brandishing a handful of the plant. "Made with this stuff. This stuff is good. Really good."

Young wiped his sickle on a tuft of plant. "How long will it last."

"If we dry it properly up to a year, more if we can make it airtight. We just need to prevent bacteria."

"What about if it was stored in CO2?" Rush's voice came from behind Young. They turned. "Well?" Rush demanded.

"Yes, that would be perfect." Inman said.

"We can seal it in crates and pump them full of CO2" Rush said.

"We have a way of doing that?" Young asked.

"No," Rush said, putting his shirt back on. "I'm just standing here making up stories for your entertainment."

Rush stalked off. Young had no idea what had got up his ass, but something had pissed him off. He and Inman followed him back too the camp.

"What are you doing?" Young asked Becker who was sitting by the fire keeping an eye on a boiling pot and working on what looked like a tangle of reed like leaves.

"Weaving baskets." He lifted it to show Young the completed base. "I need more storage in smaller sizes for the kitchen, like for keeping fruit in. They tend to bruise in crates."

"Where did you learn how to do that?"

"Calvos. He comes from a really agricultural planet, they use loads of these apparently. He was like head hunted for education as a kid though ‘cause he was bright. He's making me some vegetable nets as well. Ask him, he'll show you, he's really good at the craft thing."

Young wandered over to Calvos who was sat on a large rock. He was apparently making some sort of fibre into nets using the wooden object that Young had seen Rush making the previous evening. The Lucian Alliance soldier looked oddly domestic sitting there cross legged in his leather pants and a borrowed shirt with a lap full of net.

"Hi." Calvos said, running the shuttle through the net again, catching a loop on the fingers of his other hand and pulling the knot that appeared tight. Young watched as Calvos worked more loops around the circle of net until he reached the beginning again and he started another row and suddenly the loose loops were net. The shuttle eventually ran out of string and Calvos tied off the loose end and reached down to a bundle of string by his knee to refill the shuttle again.

"That's clever." Young said, watching as Calvos tied in the new end and continued.

Calvos laughed. "I can remember my mother doing this when I was a child, making hay nets for the animals"

"What is it?" Young gestured at the net.

"Vegetable net, small gaps so they don't escape, they bruise the vegetables less than crates, you can see what you have and they stop the vegetables getting mouldy from being in a wet box."

Young nodded. Not something he had thought about himself, but it made sense and new storage solutions were always useful.

"What's it made of?"

"It is animal hair, from the herd beasts, They shed it when they rub against trees. It is all over the area by the river. Varro found it when he came here the first day with Doctor Inman."

Young reached out and fingered some of the string thoughtfully. It was dense but slightly hairy and rough to touch. "You made the string too?"

"Yes. People have been collecting it for me since Varro saw it. Wash it, card it with two borrowed hairbrushes and then spin it. It's too rough for clothes, but fine for string. I made a lot of the wool for your socks, before you were letting us help on the ship too. It's easy to learn, harder to keep the thread even, but anyone can make good enough thread to make nets or simple fabric or to knit. Doctor Rush said he will make more shuttles and some knitting needles so I can teach other people now I work more. I need a crochet hook too, Chloe says she will teach me."

Young nodded of course, Rush was the carver round here, though he hadn't realised that the wool had come from Calvos.

"Could you make, like, a belt from this string?" He asked.

"It would be quite easy to plait or knot a belt." Calvos said.

"Rush needs one." Young said.

Calvos nodded "I can do that. New underwear." He said pensively. "That is what I want."

Young laughed. "Yeah, that would be good. If we keep going this way we'll all be wearing leather pants like you guys."

"Could be worse." Calvos shrugged. "They last well. They are comfortable."

Young had a sudden flashback to Rush mentioning he had worn leather pants in his twenties. "Somehow I can't see myself in leather pants." He said with a smile.

"If that is all we have I think that is what we will wear. Your trousers are looking like they need mending at the knees already. Maybe you should put leather patches on the knees and elbows of your uniforms?"

Young nodded thoughtfully. "Probably a good idea."

"Would you please pass me some more fuzzy string."

"Fuzzy string?" Young laughed.

Calvos looked at him. "I don't know what else you call it, it is what Becker called it."

"Figures." Young said, handing Calvos another handful of the hairy string.

"Doctor Inman thinks also that the buckwheat plants might work to make a fabric you call linen. She has been talking to Mr Brody about making a loom." Calvos added.

"Good." Young continued to watch as the shuttle was threaded through and back, another row of net appearing.

"You want a go?" Calvos asked.

"Maybe I'll wait until Rush makes you another shuttle before I mess up your good work." Young demurred.

Calvos laughed. "Won't be long." He unwound some of the thread again and continued another row. "He watches you, you know. I think he actually likes you."

Young stopped, face freezing. "What?"

Calvos looked up concerned. "I'm sorry, have I offended you?"

"No...well...shocked me." Young said, realising Calvos came from an entirely different cultural background.

"Sorry. Leanne says I have gaydar. And apparently straightdar too." He laughed, Young wondered who else he had noted noticing each other to result in those explanations. "She had to explain it to me, but I observe these things, people watching people. It was a…survival technique in the Lucian Alliance. If it's rude I won't mention it again to anyone."

"Do you mean he watches me... _that_ way?"

"No, not that way, just watches you a lot and not angrily." Calvos said looking down at the net as he pulled a knot tight. "Though everyone seems to think you hate each other."

"Not so much anymore." Young said, wanting to change the subject. "We've had to learn to get along."

Calvos looked back up at him and nodded sympathetically. "Always the same when you live and work with the same people all the time, farms, ships, secret operations on enemy planets," he grinned ruefully and Young chuckled, "you have to learn to get along."

"True." Young agreed. "Though you seem to be getting along a lot better now."

"Yeah." Calvos said. "Leanne has helped a lot and now I am doing things with Mr Brody and Becker I am talking to people a lot more."

"Good. Well, I'll leave you to it, but you'll have to show me when you get another shuttle. And the knitting, maybe next time I'll make my own socks."

Calvos nodded, smiling and Young left, fast.

 xxxoooxxx

Young left the fire. He hadn't been this full of food in a long time, he was still feeling pleasantly stuffed even a couple of hours after dinner and had not been inclined to move until it had settled at least a little. He was aware that Rush had disappeared some time earlier. Rush had been carving again, making a wooden spoon for Becker apparently and when he had finished had got up and left to seek his bed, their bed, saying goodnight. Young had bid him goodnight with the others without much of a thought. He supposed he was finally beginning to get used to the man even if he didn't entirely trust him yet.

He wandered back to their shelter, stooping and quietly opening the hanging to get in without waking the other man. Rush appeared to be asleep already, curled on his side, blanket pulled partway up his chest and arm thrown loosely over the top of it.

Young shucked out of his pants and jacket and slid between the blankets wondering what to do with himself, where to lie. There was no need for them to sleep close here, the planet was warm, the two blankets and the insulating pallet more than enough to keep them at a comfortable temperature. The previous night the conversation had ensured he had already been pushed past his interpersonal comfort zone and curling up with the other man had happened automatically. Now with time to think about what the hell he was doing, and the impact of the conversation last night having had time to settle in, he was second guessing himself, feeling bothered about the fact that he was _choosing_ to sleep with the other man.

His instinct was to roll into Rush's body, curl into the warmth, but he just rolled to face the other man, closed his eyes and sighed, trying to relax. He listened to the other man's breathing, the slight creaks of the pallet under him as he tried to get comfortable. Outside he could hear quiet voices. He spent a while trying to work out who was speaking, finally coming to the conclusion that it was Barnes and Calvos he could hear. Young shifted his knee up to better prop himself up and froze as his knee brushed Rush's hip.

"Oh for fuck's sake." Rush said.

Young jumped, he hadn't realised Rush was awake. "Sorry." He apologised. "I didn't mean to wake you."

"You already did when you came in. Do me a favour and don't flinch every time any part of you touches me." Rush reached out and grabbed Young's hand wrapping it firmly in his before he closed his eyes and shifted, settling further into the pallet. "Stop stressing and go to sleep Young. You'll know where I am now."

Young couldn't tell when Rush went to sleep, or even if he did go to sleep, at some point his hand relaxed a little around Young's but didn't let go. It was true, Young knew where he was, the contact defining their locations in space in a less charged way than being closer together. It was reassuring though.

He still lay there, sleepless. Somewhere a way away he could hear the slight sounds that suggested people were having sex, probably Becker and Inman, he doubted it was Calvos and Barnes, and the other shelters were a little further away, although you couldn't tell he thought. You _really_ couldn't tell these days. He pulled Rush's hand a little closer to him, so his arm wasn't so outstretched and settled down into the bed to try and sleep.

 

_Shots whistled over his head, the ground smelled of dust and metal, the sweet smell of burned flesh, the copper sour smell of blood and a sudden ammonia smell of urine. He had bound the wound on Sawyer's head, it had bled like crazy even though it was small, but even he could see that this was hopeless, the minor wounds were nothing against the staff weapon burn to his stomach and the fact he wasn't moving his legs at all._

_He stood, scrabbled up the side of the crater and lifted up over the edge of the rock rim just enough to fire a couple of shots back then gave up sliding back down to where Sawyer lay in the bottom, and crouched against the wall of  the crater. He could hear suppressing fire coming from elsewhere, more regular than him, and having a more significant effect on the shots that had them pinned down where Sawyer had landed in the bomb crater._

_He moved back down to Sawyer, reaching out to grab his jaw and turn his face towards Young himself. "Hey Steve, I'm here."_

_"Hurts." Sawyer replied, voice tight with pain, unable to suppress a whimper. "My head hurts." Not the giant burn on his stomach, severing the webbing of his gear, scorched through the combat pattern of his fatigue jacket. "It hurts sir."_

_"I know." Young said._

_"Gonna die." Sawyer's voice was quiet, despairing. "I can't feel my legs. Tell Rachel I love her."_

_"'S alright." Young reassured him. "I will."_

_"You're gonna be…here…right?" Sawyer asked. "Don't leave me. Gonna be..." His voice faded out, but his eyes were still fixed on Young._

_Young could see tears falling on Sawyer's face and knew they were his own. "Not going anywhere." Young reassured him._

_Sawyer gave a slight pained smile, then the light faded from his eyes and they went unfocussed._

_"Not leaving." Young said uselessly, "not leaving," hunkering down close by him, pressing his cheek to the other man's then pulling back again, to see the unconscious face of Rush laying in the dirt and rocks, bleeding, so much blood..._

 "Young!" _The body's eyes opened and glared at him._

_He threw himself backwards, scrabbling, trying to get away, trying to force himself away from the body in the dirt..._

 "Young!"

_The voice was quiet and urgent, not matching the baleful look on the face of the corpse..._

"You're dreaming."

 _The body lunged for him. Hands on his shoulder grabbing, shaking_ …and a hand on his back rubbing firm circles.

He flinched wildly his eyes slammed open, staring directly into Rush's face, hearing himself yell in shock. The arms around him tightened, containing him and he collapsed into Rush's chest burying his face in Rush's neck. Rush's hand was still smoothing over his back as Young shuddered against him, still terrified, wondering if he was going insane from his reaction to the dream.

There was a noise at the door, Young took a deep breath and tried to calm his breathing. Rush pulled back a little and looked up from where they lay face to face on the pillow. Young let his head fall sideways onto the pillow, though still tucked towards Rush's chest.

"You okay?" Calvos' voice was quiet, concerned.

"Nightmares." Rush said in a low voice. "Bad dreams."

Young squinted sideways without moving; Calvos had poked his head through the curtain and was nodding in comprehension. "Okay. You want a cup of tea?"

Young felt Rush nod. "Yeah, good idea."

There was more than one set of footsteps moving away and Young struggled to extricate himself.

"Calm down." Rush's voice was firm and just a little sharp. Rush's hands shifted and he helped them both to sitting, arm still round Young's shoulders. "You okay?"

Young scrubbed at his hair with the heel of his hand. It was damp and sweaty. "Yeah, okay now." He shifted uncomfortably. "A bit embarrassed that I've woken up the whole of the camp."

"I don't think you were that loud." Rush said. "You only shouted twice."

"Yeah, great." He looked away from Rush.

Rush snorted. "Not like you can do anything about it."

"Yeah, but you aren't the one waking up the camp screaming."

"Not this time." Rush said. "But there's more than enough times I get night terrors."

Young looked up at Rush, who was looking at him. "I didn't know."

"No reason you would." Rush's voice was curt, but his expression was softer.

"Does anyone know?"

"Chloe." Rush looked away. "We have...similar dreams." Damn, thought Young, the direct route to a guilt trip, particularly after _that_ dream. He felt his breath begin to quicken in his chest again but Rush continued. "We used to end up drinking tea in the mess late at night for quite a while. It's not so often now. Comes in fits and starts. You want a cup of tea?"

Young was very glad at the change of topic. "Yeah. Let's do that."

They crawled out of the shelter. Young instantly looked around, but the only people visible were Barnes and Calvos at the fire, watching a pot of water boil and readying four cups. He made his way over and sat down on a log pulled up close for that reason. Barnes was adding something to the cups from a canteen and Calvos was building up the fire, adding more logs around the glowing coals he had piled up to heat the water. The log shifted as Rush sat down next to him.

No one spoke while the tea steeped and it was passed around. He blew on the surface of his tea to cool it a little then took a sip and started back in shock, moving his hand so as not to spill the drink. It was sweet, really sweet.

"What…?" he asked, gesturing with his free hand at the cup.

Barnes laughed. "It's sap, from those plants with all the beetle things. Sugary sap. Greer found it by accident, fell over one and got covered in the stuff from broken stems. Inman was saying something about a symbiotic relationship. Anyway, it's edible, practically pure sugar syrup. Becker was going to keep it as a surprise, but I thought you could do with something nice after a shock."

"How do you get it out?" Rush asked, sipping it his own sweet tea.

The taste was almost decadent, the sweetest thing Young had tasted since they had arrived here.

"Tap it like maple syrup apparently, she's using sharpened reeds at the moment and canteens, but she's going to get better supplies from Destiny when we go back. She's taken seeds too, hopefully it'll grow when the hydroponics is back up and running."

Young nodded appreciatively sipping at the drink. He stared at the fire for a while finishing the drink.

"Well," Barnes said, "I'm going back to bed." She rinsed out her cup with a bit of water from a crate with a cloth over it and put it back with the others.

"Me too." Calvos said quickly.

They stood and wandered off. Once they had retreated into their shelter Young turned to Rush who was looking after the pair.

"Wonder what's going on there."

"Your guess is as good as mine."

"I thought Calvos was into Eli, and gay."

Rush snorted. "Doesn't mean he doesn't like girls too. But I'll agree, he does seem to still like Eli."

Young tipped back his head to drain the last of the sweet tea from the cup then rinsed it.

"What's the time?" he asked Rush.

Rush shrugged. "I'd guess a couple of hours to dawn."

"Bed?"

Rush nodded in response and pushed himself to his feet. In the shelter Young slid into bed, but before he had got to the awkward thoughts of how to position himself, Rush was shoving him onto his side and spooning up behind him. A little glad that the choice had been made for him, and leaning back a little into the warmth of the other man's body, Young fell asleep.


	18. Discoveries

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Telford's arrival and actions cause some strain.

The gate grated and Young waited with the others while the wormhole flattened back into place and steadied. Hefting his kit he made for the gate aware Rush was only a couple of feet behind his right shoulder. Back to Destiny. Back to normal again, he supposed. Or maybe not as normal as before, they seemed to have settled into the agreement about sleeping in the same bed here. Maybe it wouldn't be so awkward on Destiny as previously. It was weirdly reassuring knowing that he had somewhere to go, someone available, even if it was Rush.

Courtesy of the planet's slightly longer days they arrived back on Destiny in time for lunch and Young made himself eat a small portion, even though it hadn't been more than an hour or so since breakfast, not wanting to wait all of the way through till dinner. He followed it with a handover meeting with Scott and Camile and then a short meeting with TJ about the crew (approximately half of those sent there) who were allergic to one of the common plants on Down Below. By the time he had had dinner and retreated to his quarters he was surprisingly tired. Almost tired enough not to notice the fact he was alone for the first time in three nights.

xxxoooxxx

Watching via kino was annoying. Rush was itching to be there, frustrated that he couldn't be getting this done quicker. It would be quicker if he was there. The working party of Greer, Atienza and Brody weren't even close yet but he was already sat at the screen. The bridge door opened behind him and he jumped as a hand landed on his shoulder. It was Camile.

"Nicholas, I hope you've been keeping safe. That last set of cold on the ship did you no good at all."

Or maybe not Camile. "Susannah." From somewhere he found a smile for her.

"Of course. TJ asked me back to look at some allergic rashes and to go over some more training.  I thought I'd catch up with you, look at your hands, but TJ said you were up here being irritated watching the repair work. Now while you're still waiting for them to even get there, let me take a look at those hands."

Rush scowled and she smiled at him, reaching round him for his wrists and lifting both hands away from the console gently. Rush stiffed, stopping her from pulling his hands any further.

"No messing around." She chided him. "We can get this over and done with now or I can order you to the infirmary for a full check up." Rush scowled at her again. "Which you don't really need, I just need to check your hands."

He relented and let her draw his hands towards her, turning them over to examine them, bending his fingers and pressing at the skin gently.

"They're looking good." She said, patting the back of his hand. "I was a little worried about the effects of the cold you experienced a couple of weeks back, but TJ said you managed to stay as warm as possible."

"I was sharing with the Colonel and Chloe made me some gloves." Rush said. "It coulda been better, was damned uncomfortable, but once we warmed up my hands seemed to go back to normal."

Susannah nodded. "Good to hear. Well, I'll let you get back to work, but do you want to meet up for dinner? Catch up with the gossip? I stocked up on gossip before I came, even some scientist gossip. And I want to ask your advice on universities for my granddaughter."

Rush smiled. "I'll see you at dinner."

"I'll come and get you." She contradicted, laughing. "I'll be waiting a long time if I wait for you to remember its dinner time."

Rush glared, but it was softened by the smile. She patted his shoulder and left.

xxxoooxxx

Rush watched the screen as Young and Scott manoeuvred the shuttle around the sheet of hull plating floating slowly out of the massive manufactory hatch. The kino was floating over Young's shoulder and the sheet was clearly visible in the front window of the shuttle. They moved the underside of the shuttle closer and closer, extending the undercarriage of the shuttle as if landing. It was only centimetres away when they engage the docking magnets in the feet and the hull panel snapped onto the feet of the shuttle, locked in place by the magnets. The shuttle rocked a little under the impact, then took off for the breach on the upper side of Destiny.

"Rush."

He looked up to see Airman Dunning walking onto the bridge, checked the posture and frowned.

"Colonel Telford." He turned back to the screen, but continued talking. "You're here to see our first hull repairs to Destiny."

"Of course."

Rush brought up the kino feed from the shuttle and from where Brody, Greer and Airman Atienza stood on the hull in a holographic display. Telford came down the steps to look at the display, leaning on the rail at the edge of the chair.

"What are they doing?"

"They've used the magnetic clamps on the feet of the shuttle to lock on to the panel and they are flying it round to where the team are waiting to attach it to the hole in the hull which has already been cut back to the shape of the panel."

Rush could see Telford nod in his peripheral vision.

"You're attaching the whole panel?" Telford queried.

"We'll be attaching eight in total. Two today. It's the largest of the holes we are planning to patch while we are here."

"Why didn't you try out the technique on a smaller hole first?"

Rush scowled. "We have very limited time while we are here and of the resolvable damage, this hole is the highest risk to Destiny's structural integrity. Any patch here is a benefit, even if we have to replace it again later. It will also allow us to undertake much needed interior work in the future."

"What work?"

Rush turned to Telford. "The cold area. Colonel I'm sure you have been briefed about this. If you require a further briefing I can arrange for Doctor Park to go over the project plan with you again."

"Doctor Park, isn't she still blind?"

"Yes, but strangely enough being blind hasn't affected her ability to think or retain information, and my other scientists are either out there" he gestured at the screen "Or on one of the planets. Now, if you'll excuse me I'm trying to monitor the area in which the repairs are taking place." Rush snapped. "Feel free to watch."

Telford shut up, allowing Rush to go back to watching the monitors and the internal sensors under the patch area.

"Back off, back off!" Greer's voice came clearly through the comms feed.

On the kino Rush could see the three on the hull back pedalling to get out of the way of the shuttle. He caught Telford's inhalation behind him. "There's a spare console over there Colonel." He gestured without looking up. Footsteps behind him indicated Telford was taking the spare console. Rush scowled, it was a pity he had not just left.

xxxoooxxx

Young put his hands on his hips, facing Telford who had cornered him in his quarters within twenty minutes of him getting back off the shuttle.

"I'm having the same problem that my scientists reported before Everett, your crew are being consistently unhelpful." Telford frowned. "We are here to take back as much detail on Destiny's systems as possible, particularly the areas you're just opening, before you go back into FTL."

Young took a deep breath trying to remember this was David, who was his friend and had a tendency to be over focussed and a little obsessive which had stood him in good stead in the past, despite the fact that it was damned irritating at the moment. He tried to put it in a way that would get through to him, sometimes you just had to say it the right way.

"David, I know you find this frustrating, but we've got a very tight window here and a lot to do with rapidly changing priorities. I've given you access to all the reports, I suggest that you and your science lead sit down and familiarise yourself with what's going on, then you can listen in on the afternoon briefing to bring yourselves right up to date."

Telford looked at him brows furrowed.

"What else do you want David? I'm giving you unrestricted access to my command briefings when you have no actual authority on this ship, I can't be more helpful than that."

"I can't believe that no-one has the time to work with my scientists."

" _Every_ available crew member is either working on maintenance or working on harvesting supplies. I spent the morning shuttling hull panels from the seedship, and I'm spending the afternoon welding deck plating and replacing burned out squingies in door controls.

"You are more than welcome to join me David. I have 36 crew on board and everyone is busy with the exception of the four crew I have sacrificed to allow you and your science team on board. And I know you can use an arc welder." Young tipped his head to regard Telford and saw the point that David caved. "Come on David," he said with a grin, "roll your sleeves up, get stuck in and get grubby. It's been years since we've worked together like this. Not since that Teltak..."

Telford sighed, rolled his eyes and gave a grin back. "Fine, you got me Everett."

"It's not entirely wasted time on your part David, the welder is Ancient and you'll get a grip of how the systems are built when we start on the doors."

David laughed. "I'm sold Everett, you got me."

xxxoooxxx

It was actually enjoyable working with David. Young took him with him when he went to collect his work allocation from Brody, to Brody's intense surprise, and they walked through the ship to an area on the route to the cold area which had been prioritised for repair.

They got to work companionably and it didn't take long for Young to remember exactly why they had become friends as they fell into a routine of working, one supporting the sheet, the other welding, turn and turn about, securing the insulating panels and decking and bulkhead sheets inside of the recently patched hull.

"Honestly that guy can never keep them on."

"He really did it, with no...?"

"Yep, and that's when the damn gate opens, just as if it had never..."

Young was trying not to laugh so hard the panel he was holding in place would move, muscles shaking with laughter. He looked up as Telford stopped talking, seeing Telford's eyes focus on something over the top of his head. Young looked up grinning to see Eli standing in the doorway.

"I think we've made good progress." Telford said. "We're halfway down this corridor, which is further than Brody expected."

Eli was looking more than a little surprised, looking from one to the other, particularly at Telford who was smiling as he held the welder where he had been securing a sheet of wall panelling in position.

"One moment Eli." Young bumped Telford's hip with his knee "I can't hold this up forever David." Telford laughed and finished welding the panel in place.

Eli walked up to them. "Hey guys, um, I've got the squingies and whatever for the doors and the sensors."

Young nodded. "You need our help?"

Eli shrugged. "If you've got the time. I can be checking the squingies while you do another panel, then you guys can start replacing the ones I've marked." He waved a piece of chalk at them. "Same with the replacement connectors. It's quicker to check ‘em than it is to get them out and put a new one in." He shrugged. "But it's pretty much the same two jobs over and over."

They agreed, and while Eli started checking, put up another panel.

xxxoooxxx

Rush collected his helping of food, stir-fried meat and vegetables with steamed buckwheat-plant-grains and sat down. It was surprising edible, he noted as he started to eat, the benefits of three planets worth of flora and fauna to forage. With a clatter of plate and mug on the table, Eli sat himself down opposite Rush. Rush looked up as he sat, taking in the young man's confused expression.

Eli sat there, not eating the food on his plate just stirring his dinner with the spoon in his hand.  Rush waited, but whatever it was he desperately wanted to say, Eli wasn't going to start the conversation.

"What is it Eli?"  Rush asked the expected question a little curtly.

"Uh, do you think that Colonel Young and Colonel Telford…? I…well…"

"Is there a point to this Eli?"

 "They were like, working on my corridor this afternoon, putting up panels and then refitting squingies with me."

Rush looked at him trying not to let any particular interest show on his face. "And? I hardly think Colonel Young helping with repairs is new or novel and Colonel Telford is no doubt bored as there is no one for him to pester." He turned back to his food.

Eli shook his head in frustration. "No that's not it at all, it's just they were like, friendly, like when I turned up they were laughing together."

Rush paused a moment, abruptly irritated by Eli's sudden disturbance of his dinner.

"They've known each other for some years." He said brusquely. "They were friends. It's not unlikely that they should be getting on is it?"

Eli shifted in his seat. "Yeah, it's just I didn't think they were getting on."

Rush shrugged, spoon half way to his mouth. "No accounting for taste is there?"!

Eli laughed.  "Which one are you talking about though?"

Rush snorted but didn't reply.

xxxoooxxx

Telford and his scientists stayed the full four days, but thankfully Young's discussion with Telford appeared to have resolved their sulking about lack of access and they attached themselves to various working parties. Gutierrez and Eli actually managed to fix another one of the recharging plates which had been discovered in the newly explored area.

When he wasn't covering his bridge shifts, Young found himself largely working with Telford. Mainly the shared work consisted of either welding panels, or, when Scott went on shore leave on Thick Woods with Chloe and a large party, on the shuttle. With his basic grasp of Ancient assisting his learning curve and his existing pilot training, Telford quickly mastered piloting the shuttle. For his part, for some reason Telford appeared to be trying very hard to be pleasant and things were almost like they had been before all of the disaster with the Lucian Alliance. Young guessed it was Telford's guilt over that that was the reason for his current efforts to camaraderie.

Repairs appeared to be progressing at a reasonable rate, supplies were building faster than they had hoped, and Young was finally beginning to relax a little. The only irritation was Rush, who once again appeared to be randomly, certainly inexplicably, pissed off. Their last conversation had been very brief, starting with Rush walking into his quarters without asking when Young and Telford had been discussing internal politics at Homeworld Command.

"Colonel Young?" Rush's tone was sour as he strode through the open doorway.

Young looked up. "Rush?" He reassessed his greeting in the face of the glare directed at them. "Is everything okay?"

"It's fine. Chloe and Eli have concurred with my figures on a parallel jump with the seedship."

Young grinned, more good news. "Excellent. We can focus on the repair schedule."

"Yeah." Rush agreed, without his demeanour softening. "I want to make use of the seedship in the interim."

Young looked at him with interest. "What for?"

"If we don't need it to remain attached there's no reason why we can't ask her to be undertaking a little more mining. There's some minerals we need as additives to the glass for the dome. I can programme the seedship to track some down and retrieve it."

"Is that a good idea?" Telford queried. "Letting the seedship go when you need to take it with you?"

Rush scowled. "The seedship can't do the mining when we're attached to it. And in the unlikely event that something goes wrong with the seedship, we can get Destiny to collect it before we leave. That's if you want a hydroponics dome again?" He added sarcastically. "I was assuming that was still a priority?"

"Rush…" Telford started. 

Young waved him to silence before it broke into an argument. "How risky is it?"

"It isn't." Rush said. "The seedship can't leave the system, and if it did fail, we could collect it."

"Could we live without the minerals?" Young queried.

"Not if you want a dome. The manufactory needs some specific additives if you want it to make dome panels. It can't make something from nothing." This last was sharper and directed at Telford.

"Okay." Young agreed. "Is the day after tomorrow a good time scale? With any luck it'll be done and back well before we need to consider leaving."

"Works for me." Rush said. "It shouldn't take long to program what we need into the seedship. Eli and I can do it before he goes on his shore leave tomorrow."

"I'm still not sure this is a good idea." Telford said. 

"I'll take that under advisement." Young said. He turned back to Rush.  "You'd better get programming. I'll get Camile to alter the work schedules, increase the foraging parties with the freed up working groups."

Rush, still looking surly, nodded and walked out.

"I don't know why you fold every time he asks for something." David told him.

"I don't, Young said irritated, "and this is something that we have already discussed." Young raised his eyebrow pointedly, "And he's right a lot of the time."

Telford looked frustrated. "Yes, but letting the seedship wander off."

"You read the briefing David, it's been mining for four years. It can't get out of the system, there's nowhere we can't retrieve it." Young stared at him. "What's the problem? It's getting materials we need to fix the dome."

Telford frowned but let the conversation drop. "It's getting close to lunchtime." He said. "You want to go find out what's cooking?"

Young nodded, relaxing. "Good idea."

xxxoooxxx

Telford and his team left on the fourth day. Whilst renewing his friendship with Telford had been pleasant, it was a relief to get them off the ship. One less thing to worry about. Somehow he still could not quite begin to trust them, particularly Gutierrez. Eli seemed to have made some common ground with him, but then Eli could get on with practically everyone. However, Gutierrez just rubbed Young, and to be honest practically everyone, up the wrong way. Even Telford apparently.

And that was another issue. Despite their renewed goodwill, Young still found himself watchful in Telford's presence, relaxing for a while then suddenly catching himself and second guessing what was happening. The sudden jumps were wearing on his nerves. 

He saw them off in the stones room.

"I'll see you at the next briefing David." Young clapped Telford on the shoulder. "Maybe we can go for that drink you were promising me. It's got to be better than what Brody makes."

Telford gave him an apologetic look. "Not the next one Everett, I've got leave owing. I'm taking a few days off, going to visit family and friends. Gutierrez will be giving our report."

 _Great_ , Young thought. "Well, maybe next time David."

"Yeah, we'll do the next one."

They disconnected the stones and were gone. Young went to find some peace and quiet for a few minutes to decompress before trying to find Rush to ask about the progress of various projects.

Rush hadn't helped Young's stress level at all over the last few days. He had spent the intervening days since they had returned in a foul mood. Young was guessing that this was down to the presence of Telford's scientists but he had not had a chance to catch Rush alone to find out what the hell was going on. Rush once again appeared to be avoiding him. With Telford aboard, Young had not risked being caught in a compromising position with Rush, the risk of being caught leaving or entering Rush's quarters at night by crew was bad enough. Young still hadn't worked out what to tell the crew if he was found leaving Rush's quarters at night, but he trusted his crew much more than Telford and his Homeworld Command scientists. He was certain the crew would protect one of their own over Earth interference and politics, and he could always pass it off as needing to have a conversation private from the homeworld command team.

Having taken a half hour with a cup of hot sweet tea in the mess hall he went looking for Rush, who apparently was once again failing to answer his radio. Young found Volker, recently back from shore leave with a very pink sunburned nose in the core interface room and who suggested Rush was on the bridge checking on the seedship's location. Young decided to leave it, with the mood Rush was in the conversation was liable to become volatile and the bridge was really not the place for that sort of a conversation. He settled for getting an update on projects from Volker and Brody.

The following day was another non starter on the conversation front. Rush had the early bridge shift and Young the late. Rush was as surly on the handover as he had been the previous days. The bridge was on minimal staffing as they were stationary, one member of the command team, one crew member who could read a console. Young sat bored through his bridge shift, nothing happening except the shuttle, piloted by Scott, ferrying people to and from the planet Down Below. By the time Volker and Barnes arrived to take over Young was practically asleep.

He checked the core room, mess hall and observation lounge then made for his quarters. He looked around thoughtfully, then going via the showers for a quick wash and to clean his teeth, made quietly for Rush's quarters.

The room was dark, not even lit by FTL light, but Young was familiar enough with the layout by now. He walked carefully to the bed and sat down on the edge, pulling off his shoes.

"What are you doing?" Rush asked quietly.

"Coming to bed." Young said.

"Why?" Rush sounded a little confrontational.

Young slid his pants off. "You seemed to be pissed off about something. You've been avoiding me."

"And you getting into bed with me is going to resolve that?"

Young paused, crawling into bed, sliding up against Rush and throwing an arm over him. "It might. You wanna discuss what's pissing you off?"

"No." Rush replied flatly.

"Then shut up and go to sleep, Rush." Young curled closer against his side.

There was a long pause, then Rush snorted with laughter, relaxed and leaned into Young. "And sleeping together will fix it will it?"  Young did not respond but shifted to wrap his arm around Rush's waist. "A little egotistical Colonel? This isn't going to fix every disagreement we have."

"Shut up Rush, I'm trying to sleep."

With another chuckle Rush curled into Young's body and settled himself. "Good night Colonel."

xxxoooxxx

Extended briefings at Homeworld Command were an occurrence that Young could have done without. It was summer in North America and this briefing at least was sparsely attended, and those who were there were largely scientists, no one he knew well except for O'Neill. The room was stuffy and close despite the air conditioning and Young found it somewhat claustrophobic after the cool slightly metallic tasting air he was used to on Destiny.

Given the subject matter was largely Destiny's functioning and maintenance it would have made more sense for him to send Rush, Eli or Brody although he doubted Rush would even consider it despite the fact that he had largely gone back to normal after Young had climbed into his bed two nights previous and they had woken, once again, curled together in a relaxed tangle of limbs. Young still had no real idea what had got up his ass to make Rush so pissed off. Notwithstanding his improved mood Young knew there was no way he would have induced Rush to be here, science briefing or not.

However that was how these things always went. He gave the initial briefing on the topic and if Homeworld Command thought it was interesting enough they brought in the scientists. He fed back as much information as he could remember about Destiny's current situation, the resupply, the schedule that Destiny had given and the repair work that was being undertaken. The scientists quizzed him at length and he answered as best he could, before agreeing to arrange for one of the Destiny science team to come back and answer their questions more fully.

"Will it be Doctor Rush?" One of the scientists asked him, a skinny younger man who Young had met before and distrusted.

"With the repair schedule we have going I can't make any promises." Young hedged. "But I can assure you that whoever it is who comes back will be fully briefed by all relevant members of the science team."

Young knew it wouldn't be Rush, most likely it would be Eli, or maybe Eli and Brody. He kept his face impassive and helpful and was pleased when General O'Neill spoke up.

"Well, I don't know about everyone else, but it's Friday afternoon and if we're done here, my couch is calling me."

The meeting came to a close. He had two days leave here this time, most of the time the briefings were a short visit but he'd not taken much leave on Earth and it was due. He requested a private room to pick up his emails and any post. The airman who found him a room and an office was kind enough to bring him coffee and a slightly sad looking ham sandwich from the canteen and he chewed on it absently as he logged on to the computer. Most of the emails were routine, bills to pay for his storage facility, emails from extended family and an email from Emily, needing to sort something out about the last of the financial settlement. Damn. He downed the last of his coffee.

In all honesty she'd been pretty reasonable, and sighing across the house to her hadn't hurt her attitude. He tapped in the phone number for her cell phone from memory, but got a message saying it was turned off, meaning she was probably at home.  He dialled the house number, waiting as it rang, half expecting it to go through to the answering machine. After almost a dozen rings it was picked up.

"Hello?"

The male voice was unexpected…and familiar. It took Young several seconds to gather himself.

"Sorry, wrong number." He said.

"Oh, did you want Em? She's in the shower."

"Em? No sorry, I wanted Susannah." He plucked a name out of thin air.

"Sorry, yeah, wrong number."

Frozen, he put the phone down, closed the email, turned off the computer and left the room. He found the clerk who he'd spoken to when he'd arrived.

"Look, the friend who I'd arranged to meet tonight has cancelled. I'm going back to Destiny." He lied. "No point in that airman being stuck out there, I'll reschedule."

The clerk gave him a sympathetic grin and nodded.

"Fine sir." He stood. "I'll let the General know and tell Airman Lewis when he comes back."

"Thank you." Young managed to keep his voice steady when he felt anything but. He walked out, back to the stones room, so angry he didn't know what to physically do with himself, and trying to feel like he wasn't running away from Earth again. He yanked the stone off the plate and found himself sitting on the bench in the observation lounge, Eli sitting next to him. Of course, Lewis was one of the regulars. Eli gave him a funny look.

"Colonel?"

"Yes." He stood. "Look Eli, I'm back but I'm gonna take some time okay. Let Scott know, but I'm not to be disturbed till at least tomorrow and I don't want you to tell anyone else I'm back."

He walked out before Eli could say anything. He could feel his hands shaking, muscles tensing in sheer fury. He walked to his room, looking around and wondering what to do. Scott would come looking and here was too easy to find. He grabbed a handful of stuff up and walked out, letting his feet take him off to somewhere safer to hide away until he felt like talking to anyone.

xxxoooxxx

Rush saw Eli walk in and walk over to Scott for a quiet conversation, too low to be hard from where he sat at a secondary console. He was not on a bridge shift, just using one of the spare consoles in there.

"Eli." He said peremptorily as the young man went to leave.

Eli shot him an uncomfortable look before walking over. He had absolutely no ability to cover up stuff sometimes.

"What's going on Eli?"

"Uh, nothing." Eli said evasively. "Just wanted a word with Matt."

Rush fixed him with a look and Eli shifted awkwardly, not meeting his eyes.

"Eli? Need I point out that not only are you a very poor liar, you also report to me."

Eli frowned unhappily.

"Look, I'm not allowed to tell you." He said.

"Which means it's Colonel Young." Rush told him. "He's on leave."

He looked at Eli's face.

"Not on leave any more." Rush said.

"He doesn't want to be disturbed." Eli said, stressed.

"I'm sure he doesn't," Rush replied, "and far be it from me to countermand an order."

Eli gave him a suspicious look, but Rush turned back to the console and continued to work, leaving Eli to wander away after a few seconds.

There was no sign of Young at lunch, and no-one mentioned anything. Rush considered whether to bother looking for him, it was distinctly out of character for Young to act like this and the last time Young had been back to Earth for leave he'd had a bad reaction. However he evidently didn't want to be found and Rush had enough things to deal with this afternoon already. Rush finished the bowl of soup and went back to the bridge to check on the latest updates from the maintenance crews and the manufactory in the seedship. He was so close to being able to control the production controls on the seedship, and then just maybe they would get some dome glass and everyone would get off his damn back about hydroponics. Maybe he'd actually be able to get some of the important work round here done when they had that to occupy them. Young was certainly very much for it.

Young still hadn't appeared at dinner time, which was definitely unusual, the man wasn't given to missing meals. Rush looked over at Scott who appeared a little tense. Scott's bridge shift was over, James had the night shift and Camile was on in the morning. He contemplated his options. Finally, he slipped out quietly and wandered along to Young's quarters which were empty. Leaning against the wall by the door in Young's quarters he tried to think over where the man would hide.

Rush walked into his quarters, immediately noticing they were already occupied. Young was on his bed, sprawled across it asleep and there was a distinct smell of hooch. Well, that explained how Young had managed to hide all day. This was the last place anyone would think to find him. Rush walked over to the bed and looked down at Young. There was a slackness to his face and limbs that suggested he was dead drunk as well as asleep. Rush glowered at the sleeping man spread out over most of his bed.

"I think I actually liked you better as an octopus than a starfish." He muttered.

He walked over to the bed and sat down. There was no reaction from Young, even to a strong shake, although he was still alive and breathing. Rush left and came back with a couple of canteens of water and something to act as a bucket.

"You are a fucking nuisance." He told the unconscious man putting the bucket next to the bed.

He dragged Young's shoes and pants off, rolled him over into something approximating the recovery position and pulled the covers over him. Young finally mumbled something and moved restlessly.

"Fucking shut up." Muttered Rush in irritation.

He pulled his own pants off and slid into bed, next to Young. The bed was warm where Young had been lying on it. Rush opened his laptop, and got back to work. Young started to move about three hours later, restless and groaning. Rush set the laptop aside, closing it and laying it down on his side of the bed. Young mumbled something, and shifted. Rush turned back to him.

"Young?" He poked the man in the ribs.

"Gnnghh."

"Quite." Rush said. Young appeared to be trying to push himself up. "Just hold on."

He rolled Young over bodily, catching his upper arm and hauling him to sitting. Young started retching almost immediately, and Rush grabbed his shoulders and spun him, shoving his face down over the edge of the bed to where the bucket was waiting. There was an organic splattering noise as vomit hit bucket and Rush was glad he'd grabbed one of the crates, larger target, harder to miss. He let Young chuck up the contents of his stomach, reaching out, snagging the canteen and beaker and pouring a cup of water.

Young finally pulled himself back up to sitting. Silently Rush handed him the cup. Young took a mouthful, swilled out his mouth and leaned to spit it in the bucket. Rush watched him as he leaned gingerly back against the pillows and sipped at the water. Young looked extremely embarrassed and Rush let him work his way through half the water before speaking.

"So," he watched as Young flinched a little, "I'm sure you have a good reason for drinking y'self into a stupor in my quarters."

Young cringed slightly, lifting a hand to rub over his brow, sweaty from vomiting, and to push his dark curls back off his face. Rush waited, watching Young.

"I had to phone Emily. She'd left a message, about some policies we'd left to mature. Was no sense cashing them in when we divorced, they were worth much more if we let them mature. We'd agreed."

Rush topped up the beaker from the canteen again. Young sipped at it, retched, but managed to hold it down and then stared across at the window.

"Telford answered." Young said.

"Ahh."

Young retched again, but steadied himself. "Christ, that stuff of Brody's is lethal."

"I don't think ye'll find anyone arguing with you on that count." Rush said, sardonically. "You look like shit, Young."

Young grimaced again. "I feel like it."

"Finish the water and get back to sleep. I'll be awake for a while, make sure you don't chuck up in your sleep." Rush slid out of the bed. "If you can promise not to throw up on my floor, I'll go empty the bucket so we don't have to sleep with the smell."

Young nodded. Rush picked up the crate, taking it to the nearest toilet, practically unused except for by him, emptied it and returned quickly. Young was curled in the centre of the bed, looking ill. He put the makeshift bucket back on Young's side of the bed and walking back round, slid in. Young moved a little, pushing himself up to allow Rush more room Rush sat back, picking up the book looking down as Young shivered.

"You can lean up against me if you're cold." Rush said. "As long as you don't vomit."

He watched as Young leaned up against Rush's leg, then moved in closer. Young shivered again and finally Rush grabbed him and hauled him closer so he lay up against Rush. Young closed his eyes with a look of nausea, then after a moment relaxed and rested his head on Rush's leg.

"What did you drink when you were young?" He asked Rush as Rush looked down, waiting to see if he was going to be sick again.

"Beer, or Bucky."

"Bucky?"

"Buckfast, Buckfast Tonic Wine. Filthy stuff but it'll get you trashed quick and it's cheap."

"Does it taste good?" Young queried.

"Not really, but better than Brody's paint-stripper." He rested his hand on Young's shoulder. "Get some sleep Young."

Young moved, Rush wasn't sure what he was doing, but he settled further into Rush's lap and closed his eyes. Rush leaned his elbow on Young's shoulder and opened the book.

xxxoooxxx

"Have you seen Doctor Rush or the Colonel?"

TJ looked up. Scott and Brody were standing there in the doorway.

"No, I've not seen Rush for a while."

"Ah."

TJ tucked a loose bit of hair behind her ear. "Isn't the Colonel on Earth?"

Scott looked awkward. "He cut his stay short."  He shifted awkwardly, looking down at the floor in embarrassment. "He said he was taking the day off though."

"Well he was on leave. Why did you want to know if I'd seen him?"

Scott lifted the radio in his hand.

"Neither of them is answering their radios."

TJ raised an eyebrow.

"And you need them?"

Scott nodded.

"We've got some unusual readings from the planet." Said Brody. "I couldn't raise Rush so we tried the Colonel, see what he wanted us to do but when I couldn't raise either of them I woke up Lieutenant Scott."

"It's late evening." She noted. "Are they asleep as well? Like most people are?"

Brody shrugged.

"Eli checked Rush's quarters. He's not answering his door."

"Nor is the Colonel." Scott asked.

TJ looked at them, frowning.

"Is this a "medical emergency"?" She asked pointedly.

Brody's face was a picture of indecision and Scott's was schooled into the face she knew he reserved for tough questions from senior officers he didn't want to answer.

"It's very out of character." Scott offered. "We genuinely are wondering where they are. Doctor Rush has disappeared before…"

"When he was sneaking around behind the Colonel's back." TJ interjected voicing the obvious implication.

Scott and Brody both looked at her.

"Well, yes." Brody agreed nodding. "But the Colonel is never unavailable."

TJ gave them a long look.

"Which has just made you think you can disturb him at all hours of the day and night. Even when he's on leave."

They at least had the grace to look at least a little shamefaced.

"I'll check." She agreed. "But only because I agree it is out of character for the Colonel."

They both looked relieved. TJ sighed. She grabbed her small first aid bag just in case, stood up and walked out of the infirmary towards Everett's quarters, get the more awkward of the pair done with first. Rush was just going to be verbally aggressive. They followed her down the corridor. She turned to face them.

"Look if I'm doing this you're not going to be following me all the way there. For starters, I have no idea what Doctor Rush wears in bed, and I'm sure he doesn't want you to know either okay?"

They looked at each other and left in the direction of the bridge.

She sighed and walked towards Everett's quarters. Standing outside she sucked in a breath and knocked. There was no answer. She knocked again and waited. Nothing. After a moment she hit the door release. The door slid open and she stood in the doorway, then released the breath she had been holding. The room was empty.

She hit the door release again and the door slid closed.

She passed a couple of people on her way to Rush's quarters, evidently finding their own beds, but the corridor outside his quarters was deserted. She knocked on the door, but again there was no answer. She tried again and after a few moments, hit the door release. She could hear someone further up the corridor and hurriedly stepped through as the door opened hitting the door closure as she stepped through. She stopped dead.

The bed was tenanted.

A pair of dark eyes regarded her through reading glasses. Rush was sitting up in bed, reading a book. Young appeared asleep, curled into Rush's lap, Rush's elbow was propped on his shoulder. He was apparently dressed, as was what she could see of the Colonel although he was mostly covered by the bedclothes.

TJ froze for a moment then spoke.

"Neither of you were answering your radios." She said quietly. "And no-one could find you."

Rush gave her a slow blink.

"It's under the pillows." He said in an equally low voice. "He can't hear it."

TJ paused.

"What are you doing here?" she asked.

Rush looked at her with a look that would have frozen the contents of Brody's still.

"Reading," he said, making a slight gesture with the book, "in my quarters, what does it look like?"

Young shifted in his lap. Rush pulled the covers up a little. TJ was completely confused and evidently the confusion was showing on her face.

"Not what you meant Lieutenant, was it." Rush sighed and put the book down gently. "Sit down Lieutenant." He said wearily gesturing at the end of the bed.

She walked over and sat down as gently as possible. Rush looked at her.

"There is absolutely nothing compromising happening here Lieutenant." He said. "Strangely enough, I do have the occasional need for human contact Tamara."

The use of her first name startled her a little.

"As does he." Rush continued quietly. "And it's not like either of us have a great deal of opportunity to relax with our peers given his leadership role and the fact that most of the science team are morons."

TJ said nothing, just looked at Rush then the sleeping man in his lap.

"I just never…"

"Imagined we could be in the same room without wanting to kill each other and without dire necessity forcing our proximity?" Rush asked. "This doesn't change that." He gave a short laugh and Young shifted, his head coming up a little. "Well not much."

"Imagined you in bed together." She said. "I mean, in bed…like this…"

Young looked up blinking, saw TJ and stopped. He looked terrible, eyes reddened and face drawn.

"Hi." She said, embarrassed.

Young pulled himself round and sat up and TJ could see he was still dressed in T-shirt and underpants. Rush pushed his hair off his face. Young scrubbed at his own hair, avoiding her gaze, face reddening.

"So Lieutenant, what was important enough that they sent you to find us?" Rush asked her.

"Brody found some anomalous readings from the planet apparently. They tried you, couldn't raise you on the radio, so tried the Colonel and when they couldn't raise him either and neither of you answered your doors, they came to find me to see if you were okay. I tried the Colonel's quarters and then here."

Rush reached under the pillow and pulled out his radio.

"Brody?"

"Doctor Rush?" Brody's voice was almost a squawk.

"What was so important you had to send Lieutenant Johansen into my quarters to wake me up?" Rush snapped.

"You were asleep?"

"Yes, I was asleep." Rush snapped, the lie falling easily from his lips. "Strangely enough that's why I turned my radio off. Now, tell me what your problem is."

Brody broke into an explanation of the problem and Young and TJ watched him, staying silent as Rush listened then snapped out a response, which was effectively it wasn't a big issue and he'd get Volker to look at it in the morning, now fuck off and let him sleep.

Rush put the radio under the pillow again.

"You put the radio under the pillow." Young said to Rush.

Rush looked at him.

"You needed the sleep." He said scowling.

TJ watched them, watched their interaction as Young berated Rush and Rush snapped back at him. This was new and extremely confusing. They appeared to have forgotten she was there until she shifted slightly, getting ready to make her exit when they both turned and looked at her. She froze again.

"I won't tell anyone." She said.

"Who'd believe you?" asked Young wryly.

"I'm not sure I believe me." She said. "It's…not what I expected."

"I'm sorry TJ." Said Young.

"For what?"

Young paused and it was Rush who cut in. "For finding us in bed together of course."

"Oh." She said, unsure of what to say. "Well, it's none of my business really."

"There's absolutely nothing compromising going on here Tamara." Rush repeated.

She looked from one to the other. "Okay." She stood, then nodded, "It's okay, but I'd better go."

Rush gave her a hard look, but evidently decided not to go any further. Young had a complicated expression on his face.

"If anyone asks, you're both asleep in your rooms." She said.

Young nodded. "Thanks TJ." He said.

She gave him a small smile.

"Everyone's entitled to some company." She said.

Turning on her heel, she left.

"Damn." Said Young, rubbing at his face.

"Someone was guaranteed to find out in the end," Rush pointed, "if we keep doing this."

Young sighed. "I just wish it hadn't been TJ."

Rush frowned. "Lieutenant Johansen is unlikely to be sharing any confidences about this."

"Not what I was thinking." Young scowled. "I must be insane."

Rush stared at him. "Why?" He asked.

Young looked back at him, a frustrated expression creasing his face. "Continuing this…with you…the person with whom I have quite probably the most dysfunctional relationship I've ever had."

"This what? What are you saying it is exactly?"

"This…spending time…this…I don't know what. This time, this contact." Young's voice raised in frustration. He rounded on Rush angrily. "You really want to define this? Does the scientist in you really feel the need to define this?"

"No," Rush said quietly. "I don't think I do."

Young threw himself back down against the pillows. "Turn the light off and come here." He snapped.

"Is that an order?" Rush's voice had not raised, but held a distinct edge.

"If you need it to be." There was no compromise or conciliation in Young's response.

Rush looked down at him, reading his expression. Young looked back at him, challenge apparent in every crease of his face. Finally Rush reached out, put the book on the side table, turned out the light and lay down on his back next to Young. Young rolled towards Rush and wrapped himself round the other man, throwing a knee over Rush's thigh. Rush tensed then slid an arm behind Young's neck, tucking it round his shoulder.

"Go to sleep Colonel, you're thinking too hard." He said quietly.

Young said nothing, just turned his face into Rush, burying his face in Rush's hair.

Rush gave up, relaxed his muscles deliberately and systematically against the tense form next to him and went to sleep.


	19. Anger

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Some conversations are handled better than others

The final hull repairs around the cold area were proving to be a marathon effort. A six hour repair shift each day, with a half hour trip to and from the location of the breach was the plan for today and the next three days it was going to take them to fix the largest hull breach compromising the cold area. Unfortunately once they were started it really needed to be completed, without stopping. They needed to cut away even more damaged hull to affix new panels and that compromised the stability of that whole section of the hull.

It was a pretty punishing schedule, and most of the actual repair out there was being undertaken by Brody, Greer and Atienza. There wasn't really anyone else who could manage both the suits and the repairs and they seemed to work well enough together. In addition to the repair team Young and Scott were in and out of the shuttle, delivering hull panels to order from the area where the required panels had been temporarily placed and tethered before the seedship had left. On the orders of both Susannah and TJ, Rush was still confined to non-active duties and was consequently trapped on the bridge monitoring sensors and kino feeds with Calvos.

The suits were a pain to deal with. As soon as the crew in suits returned the suits had to be stripped down, emptied of any waste (a _pleasant_ job), recharged and the air and water refilled ready for them to go out again. Brody was going to be exhausted from the work outside, Volker and Park were on Big River, and Eli's shore leaves had now been completely reshuffled to include extra time on the planet Down Below as one of the few crew members who was not allergic to any of the plant life down there. He wouldn't be back for another three days.

Rush did not trust any of the non-science team crew with the suits, which were far too important to risk so after the initial reconnaissance the working party had made of the rift in the hull he had ended up doing the job himself with Corporal Barnes who had volunteered and appeared at least reasonably bright and competent with her hands. He had noted her steady hands as they had worked, and she had informed him she was trained to defuse bombs. Which meant she had at least a basic grounding in electronics and chemistry and therefore was more use to the science team than running around playing soldiers.

He had requested her time later today to deal with the suits, and again for the next three days. He was not sure how Young would take his poaching another one of his military personnel, he reflected later as he and Barnes racked the third suit and he sent her off to dinner. He was certain though that if he started Barnes working with Eli and Calvos on projects she would come down on his side of the debate. He would at least then gain her spare time, and the soldiers tended to have quite a bit of it. He had pretty much decided that Atienza was wasted as a soldier and Brody should start training him up on general maintenance, and he could do worse than apprentice Ramirez to Volker and gain another staff member with a grasp on sensor readings both spatial and planetary. It would keep Volker busy anyway.

He needed more trained staff, definitely needed more trained staff if they had a hope of getting very far with fixing everything on Young's list. Not that he had anymore trained staff, so Young was just going to have to let him have some soldiers to train.

He made his way tiredly to the mess hall and retrieved some tea and the dinner of the day, what was laughingly called salad and pate but in practice was sliced raw vegetables, meat paste and homemade crackers. The only thing it had going for it was that it didn't require Becker to make it up himself and the vegetables were at least fresh.

He grabbed a plate full and a cup of tea and sat down. For a few minutes he ate his way stolidly through the plate of food. He decided he actually liked three of the six vegetables represented, didn't mind two and hated another. On the grounds it was food though he finished the disgusting one quickly and first to get it out of the way before he went back to the others. The crackers and meat paste reminded him of being a small child and the food his mother fed them when money was tight, although being honest, money was always tight, it had seemed there was always more month left after the end of the money than money left after the end of the month. Lost in memory he was startled when Young sat down heavily opposite him.

He looked up. Young looked tired, as tired as he felt himself.

"You look a mess." He noted.

Young frowned then shrugged. "Long day."

"How long did it take you to shift the hangover?"

Young gave him a rueful look. "Till lunchtime."

Rush chuckled. "I guessed that was why Scott did all the flying this morning."

"Yeah, well." Young poked at his food.

Rush watched Young for a while before pushing Young's mug of tea towards him. "Drink your tea first. Might settle your stomach."

Young seemed too tired to protest and picked up the tea. He drank it slowly, before putting it aside and staring at his plate with a disinterested gaze.

Rush snorted and spoke in a low voice. "The light green stuff tastes a bit like raw turnips, but it's edible. The two dark green ones are a bit like basil and cabbage. The shredded white stuff is practically tasteless but crunchy, the yellow sticks are like melon and the orange shreds are a bit radishy." Young looks at him, surprised. Rush continued. "The pate tastes like dog food."

Young grimaced. "And you'd know this how?"

"Lucky guess. Eat your dinner Colonel." He swept up their mugs and went and refilled them before sitting back down and putting one in front of Young. He was tired himself and as he looked back to the counter, trying to remember if he'd added sugar syrup to the tea, he realised TJ was watching him.

She was sitting with Greer, opposite Scott and Chloe, eating her own dinner. The others seemed to be discussing something and oblivious to her attention wandering away from them. Her eyes flicked deliberately from him to where Young was poking the orange radishy stuff and then back to him again with an unspoken question. _Is he okay?_ Rush shrugged, and then nodded, giving her what he hoped was a reassuring glance and wondering how soon he could get out of here. Being Young's emotional barometer wasn't really a task he wanted to take on himself.

He turned back and took a sip of the tea which turned out to be sweet, realising that Young still hadn't eaten. "It's going to make a scene if I have to bully you to eat your meal." He muttered quietly into his tea.

"And you would care precisely why?" Young replied.

"In the interests of this crew actually functioning like any kind of a cohesive unit, you have to be at least partially effective as a leader." Rush snapped. He looked up and caught Young's eye, dropping his voice again. "Being half dead on your feet is unlikely to be conducive to that. You need food and sleep."

Young didn't reply but started working his way through the food. Rush finished the last of his own and sat there, drinking his second cup of tea and watching Young eat. Young finished then looked up at Rush again. He shifted his shoulders as if they were stiff and looked around to see who was near them before looking up and speaking with what appeared some discomfort.

"Look," Young said very quietly, "I'm sorry about what I said last night." His eyes darted out again, as if to check no one was listening. Rush could understand why. "What I said before the lights were out, I was...out of order."

Rush looked at him for a long moment, trying to read his mood, the sentiment certainly appeared genuine. "It's okay." Rush said eventually. "You were still drunk, and you were angry about a lot of things. I didn' take it personally."

Young laughed bitterly. "Just for a change you were the one person I wasn't pissed off at, at all."

Rush had to laugh at that. Their eyes met for a moment and Rush nodded, he understood what Young was saying. Young's expression looked grateful and Rush was suddenly uncomfortable. He stood, downing the last of his tea and taking his plate.

"I'd best go, I've got simulations running."

Young nodded back and Rush walked away quickly. He needed to finish working through his latest interaction with the manufactory on the seedship before it came back with the materials for the glasslike panels and he would actually need to programme it.

xxxoooxxx

TJ tried to observe Young and Rush without being noticed, either by the two men or by Chloe, Scott or Greer. She watched Rush get up and walk out. Young finished his dinner and stared at his cup of tea. Scott dragged her back into the conversation, but when it slowed again, Young was still sitting there. She managed to keep an eye on him as Scott and Greer started to argue about something related to flying the shuttle, and saw him finally get up, return the crockery and leave. After a moment she got up, made her excuses and followed him out. He realised she was following her after about two corridors and turned to see who it was.

"TJ." He said. "Is everything okay?"

"Yeah." She said uncertainly.

"You don't sound like it."

She looked at her feet. "I'm just a bit confused." She admitted.

She looked up at him and realised he was blushing. She smiled weakly.

"I'm sorry about that TJ."

"No!" she said quickly. "You don't have to feel bad about it. You're entitled to..." She tailed off, not wanting to hazard a guess as to whatever their situation was and get it wrong.

"Exactly." He said in response to her confused expression. "Look," he glanced around then walked to a door, "come in and we'll talk."

The room was a storage area, now full of crates of supplies from the planet. She sat down on the edge of one and he stood in front of her.

"So," she said uncomfortably. "What...do you want to tell me?"

He shifted to the other foot. "Uh, what do you want to know?"

She sighed. "I guess the whole situation surprised me. I was surprised when you said you and Rush were sharing in the cold, but that you're still occasionally sharing..."

Young looked uncomfortable and TJ frowned. "Is there something wrong?"

"The cold wasn't the first." He admitted. "It's been occasional since the volcano beach planet."

Her blue eyes widened as she gave him a shocked look. "Wow!"

He ducked away and flushed.

"You've been having a relationship for a while then." She said.

"It's not a relationship." He said quickly.

"Well, you're sleeping together."

"Not _sleeping together_ , just sometimes sleeping in the same bed. Like, when we need company, when things are kinda difficult."

She still looked puzzled.

"He started it I guess." Young said. "On the planet, I was having trouble with my bad knee in the cold and I guess I was moving about a lot," he paused, replaying the memory in his mind, trying to describe it in a manner that would actually explain what had happened. "And he complained and when I said it was the cold he hauled me in with him and wrapped my blankets round us too." TJ's face was almost incredulous, but Young ploughed on. "Then, the next night he had a lot of muscle pain so I returned the favour." He scratched his head, looking away. "Then, when I had a bad patch after...you know, the argument with Camile...well, I wasn't sleeping, he kinda hauled me off to bed, made me sleep." TJ was still staring at him. "And, kinda, that's been it, when things go bad...it's..." His voice tailed off, looking for her reaction.

TJ sat back on the crate for a moment, looking at him. "Sounds like you're looking out for each other." She said. She went to speak and stopped herself.

"What?" He asked.

"I'm sorry, I just have all these questions, which is rude, but it's just...a surprise."

"Yeah." He nodded ruefully. "You can say that again. Well, ask I guess."

"Well, how often?"

Young shrugged. "All three nights we were on the planet, and again on Big River," he thrust his hands in his pockets, "it seemed pointless to share with anyone else. The cold. Maybe five other times I guess."

They stared at each other. He pulled his hand out of his pocket, reached out and stroked her face and she pulled back. "No Everett." She said. "Just, no." She took his hand and squeezed it. "Even if I was...able to manage a relationship, I won't be the other woman again."

"You wouldn't..." He protested.

She cut in. "I don't want a relationship and you have a relationship with Rush."

"I don't have a relationship with Rush." Young's voice was raw.

"Okay, you have a something." She said. "An agreement, an arrangement, but I can't do a relationship like that."

"TJ…"

She patted his hand. "It's okay Everett."

She walked out.

xxxoooxxx

Rush sat at the console, scrolling slowly through a list of standard components in the manufactory's database. This would be a lot easier if he actually knew what all the components were or had worked out what all of the sections of the ship were called. The items were tagged by area, type and a selection of other things, but none of them were particularly helpful overall. In no category did he have a full understanding of the list.

He had got as far into the peripheral systems as requesting mining for primary materials, that system seemed straightforward enough, it was the same system used to request the retrieval of air and water. At the moment the seedship was mining silica, the base material for the glass.

However the manufactory itself had, unsurprisingly a considerably more complex control system. The programming which controlled the scheduling of creating components or other items evidently had two options, create and enter the full blueprint for the item in question using the correct format and terminology or select an item from the list of standard replacement components. From the list of almost seven thousand standard components.

Creating a blueprint for dome panels was out of the question, even if he did have the facilities to analyse the glass and establish what it was made of, the actual recipe for the glass would require a chemist, ideally one who could read and write Ancient. That left the list, but until he could find the dome panels in the list, presuming they even were in the list, he would not even know what else to ask the seedship to mine. He had a strong suspicion that if he queued up the appropriate item in the manufactory, the seedship would take itself off to obtain the appropriate materials anyway. However, considering their limited timescale he did not have the spare time to test this hypothesis on a random item from the list.

He sighed and went back to the list. He was damned if he was going to admit he had not got it all in hand before he had suggested it to Young. Being honest to himself he probably would not have gone so far if Telford had not been so fucking annoying. He set up another search with different terms on Destiny's database, perhaps this search would yield a component name or description and save him some time. He scowled and sat back in his seat watching the Ancient text scroll in front of his eyes.

At least searching the list was more annoying and time consuming than anything else. He would eventually find the data and then everything would just tick over. He would send the seedship mining, it would come back making panels and again he would have miraculously provided the required solution. It was definitely the allegory of the swan, all serene and in control on the surface and paddling like fuck underneath. He stifled a slightly sarcastic chuckle and scrolled on down the list.

xxxoooxxx

Rush was in the command chair monitoring the hull sensors on the second to last day of repair shifts. He watched as Brody and Atienza cut away a large chunk of damaged hull, the first of the day. As it slipped free, Greer caught it and restrained it's movement on his own for just long enough that Brody and Atienza could get a grip on it. They grabbed for it, firming their holds on it so they could begin to move it to the storage area where they would tether it until it could be moved with the other chunks to an airlock or into the shuttle to be retrieved for recycling.

On another display the shuttle made it's way from the panel storage area, inconveniently not near the hull breach to prevent any excessive stress on the damaged and structurally weak hull in that area.

The sound of the hatch and footsteps caused him to look up as Camile and someone in Dunning's body walked up to the railing.

"Rush." The tone explained who it was straight away.

"Colonel Telford." Rush tried to keep the anger out of his voice. Telford was irritating enough at the best of times, but sleeping with his supposed best friends ex-wife without admitting it was low, very low.

"Rush, I'm surprised you're in here, I'd have thought you'd be out there?" Telford gestured at the larger holographic display showing the kino feed of Brody, Atienza and Greer.

"Dr Macarthur and Lieutenant Johansen have withdrawn Rush from any activities which would risk him being exposed to excessive cold." Camile said.

Telford nodded.

"What can I do for you Colonel?" Rush asked pointedly.

"Nothing, just checking in. I'm here to discuss another visit for Doctor Gutierrez team with Everett." Telford stayed up on the platform looking down at him.

Rush clenched his teeth momentarily in irritation. That was going to be pleasant. Well, he guessed Young would have to have a conversation with Telford eventually, but Young had not looked in a good state either yesterday or this morning. Something appeared to have unbalanced Young again and Rush was fully expecting that if the mood did not lift he would find Young either drunk or in his bed again or both once this breach was fixed tomorrow evening.

"Unfortunately Colonel Young is unavailable." Rush told him. "He's on the shuttle delivering a hull panel to the repair team. Can I help you?" He tried to make the offer sound at least a little genuine and not entirely sarcastic.

"I wanted to speak to Everett about another three day fact finding trip for Gutierrez' team. Doctor Gutierrez is keen for them to come back here."

"What do they want this time?"

"They're eager to take another look at the seedship when it's back." Telford said, leaning on the railing. "Gutierrez wants to get a feel for the manufactory systems."

 _Yeah, I'll bet he does, it makes stargates._ "I'll have Eli and someone else working on the manufactory systems, monitoring the production of components and presuming the mining is successful, dome panels." Rush said. "I see no reason why Gutierrez and a colleague can't join them without too much disruption." _And it still won't help you because I'm the only one who knows how to work the control systems._

Telford raised an eyebrow. "I would have thought Everett would have needed to make that decision." He said.

 _Arsehole._ "The work on the manufactory is a science issue, and as such is within my remit." Rush said bluntly. "And as the seedship is unlikely to return for at least another few days I think I have plenty of time to arrange a time with the Colonel when he has suitable crew for your scientists to exchange with."

Telford gave a brief nod.

"Did you want to speak to Colonel Young about anything else?" Rush asked. "I can contact him and ask him to come back to the ship in the next pause in the work." Rush did not prevent the edge of sarcasm coming through in his voice, deliberately giving the impression he thought Telford was being needlessly disruptive.

"No, I'm sure that's not necessary. You obviously have it under control."

 _Too fucking right I do you conniving bastard._ "If you'll excuse me then." Rush gave him a sour look and turned back to the sensor display.

"Do you have time for a discussion before I go back?" Telford spoke quietly. There was a pause and Rush flicked a look back up to where Camile was looking at Telford curiously. "I just need to discuss some crew related matters." Telford said easily. "Potential for promotion, things like that. Particularly the military personnel. Everett has recommended some field promotions to regularise the command structure here, and I've been asked for my views."

Camile frowned. "Is that usual?"

Telford shrugged. "Nothing about this posting is usual." He said

 _Which doesn't answer anything_ , Rush thought, looking back down at the console.

Behind him he heard Telford step away from the railing. "Obviously I'd value your opinion as IOA representative but also in a professional capacity."

"If you're not busy we can have that discussion now David, if you have the time that is?"

"Of course."

And they left.

xxxoooxxx

The rest of the day drifted past in it's rotation of removal of hull and replacement of hull. Telford apparently did not stay long after his discussion with Camile and he was long gone by the time Rush got away from the bridge and had finished recharging the suits. It was the evening by the time Rush saw Young in person, though Young seemed to be avoiding him. He attempted to catch a discussion with him about Gutierrez' team at dinner. Camile had obviously already discussed Telford's earlier visit with him, but Young's response was brusque.

"Fine, get Camile to alter the schedule." And he walked off.

Rush watched him go, wondering when the explosion would happen. It did not happen that evening though and he did not try and raise the issue at the brief meeting the next morning before the final day of repairs. They were ahead of schedule by two panels and Rush fully expected them to be complete after about four hours out there.

Volker and Park were back from shore leave. Rush handed off the monitoring and suit maintenance to Volker and spent the morning working on the manufactory programming issue. Time away from it had given him fresh perspective and thinking time and he finally made a breakthrough in the mid afternoon in identifying parts made by the constituent material when a series of items he could actually identify showed up with the same reference codes. It did not take too long to start establishing codes for raw materials and an hour or so later he had a list of over forty elements and substances. He was finally able to move on.

With a better grasp of this fundamental issue he started another search through the manufactory's list of pre-programmed items it could make, running a query based on raw materials needed which produced a much shorter list of two hundred and fifty seven items. It took less than twenty minutes to locate and add dome panels to the seedship's currently empty work-queue. He also noted the tag on the listing for the dome panels that the broken sections should be recyclable, if they could cut away what was left and feed it back into the manufactory. Rush watched in satisfaction as the seedship suddenly diverted from it's current mining task to move back towards Destiny, directing itself towards one of the system's two asteroid belts.

He sat back with a satisfied sigh, contemplating what to do next. Dinner, then maybe the much needed discussion with Young.

xxxoooxxx

"Young, this is Rush." Rush had heard the earlier radio chatter and knew Young had left the bridge twenty minutes ago.

"What is it Rush?" Young did not sound like he was in a good mood. A little closer to the explosion maybe.

"If you have a moment I need to discuss the potential repairs to the dome."

"Where are you?"

"Core interface room."

"I'll be there in five minutes."

Young strode into the core room looking annoyed. He walked up and leaned on the console that Rush had been working at. He looked up from the time estimates on the mining.

"I wanted to let you know that the seedship now has dome panels fully queued up in it's manufactory work queue, and the mining estimate suggests it will start construction of the first panels in two days."

Young tilted his head with a scowl. "You called me here for that?"

Rush paused a moment then spoke. "We need to discuss Telford." Rush said. "How we're going to manage him."

Young was silent, face angry.

"He's only going to keep pushing for his pet scientists to have access to Destiny which means he's going to be back here on a regular basis." Rush persisted. "I need to know if you're capable of dealing with him."

He waited but Young stayed resolutely silent.

"Look, Colonel," Rush said sharply. "This is not something we can ignore. He will be to-ing and fro-ing between Earth and Destiny as long as Gutierrez wants to play with the seedship, and I'm not willing to have to manage you having a meltdown every time you have to deal with him."

"That's none of your business Rush." Young snapped.

"I think it is," Rush interjected angrily, "I'm the one who had to field his further demands we baby sit Gutierrez and his trained monkeys so you didn't have to talk to him."

"This is none of your business!" Young repeated, raising his voice. "I didn't _ask_ you to talk to Telford."

"Like you would have managed it?" Rush scoffed. "You can't even manage to talk to _me_ about it."

Young glared. "And that's a really good indicator is it?" He growled.

Rush glared back at him. "You can't just ignore this."

"Why not, you do. Being avoidant and elusive is practically a trademark of yours." Young said angrily. "Back. Off."

"At least I think about things. I possibly might even talk about them given the right opportunity. You won't even consider this."

Young's knuckles were white on the edge of the console as he leaned in threateningly. "He is _fucking Emily_. The manipulative bastard has wormed his way back in to my wife's bed again."

" _Ex_ -wife." Rush interjected coldly. "And forgive me if my only concern in this matter is for how it impacts on your personal effectiveness, The fact is I have absolutely no concern at all for the welfare of your ex-wife, who left you and is now engaged in a relationship with your best friend." Rush's voice was icy. "Or maybe that's _ex_ -best friend."

For a moment Rush was convinced Young was going to hit him, then Young shoved himself away from the console, spun and stormed off.

"Fuck!" Rush swore slamming the heel of his hand into the edge of the console in frustration. "Fuck!"

 


	20. A cup of tea

Young limped towards his quarters. The bottle had been calling him and rather than give in to the lure of alcohol he had gone running. He did not think he had done any specific damage to his knee, but had definitely overworked it and it ached. He made it back to his quarters, stepping in and making for the bed, shedding clothes without turning on the light. Without the FTL glow it was almost completely dark in there and it wasn't until he sat on the edge of the bed he realised it was already occupied.

Cautiously he reached out, gently touching tousled hair. Rush mumbled in his sleep as Young's careful fingertip exploration established he was lying on his side with his back to Young. Young slid in under the covers. Rush had evidently been here some time and had warmed the bed up. Young sighed as he relaxed into the warmth and leaned his forehead against Rush's shoulder blades. What a fucking mess.

He did not understand why Rush was pushing him on the issue of Telford and Emily, pushing it even to the point of an argument. He could understand Rush having a problem with how Young was, to be honest, failing to deal with Telford, but why Rush was so annoyed about it, that did not seem typical.

Rush twitched restlessly in his sleep and Young sighed, wrapping an arm around Rush. Rush shifted again without waking fully, rolling in Young's arms to wrap limbs around him, a little further down the bed that Young, mumbling slightly into Young's chest. Young was still angry about the earlier argument, Rush had been bang out of order and had gone right for the jugular. But the thought that he was at least partially right even if he had been a complete bastard about it give Young a pang of guilt.

The fact that even after the argument they had had Rush had come here also gave him pause. TJ's words came back to him _You look out for each other._ He swallowed against the stab of pain that the memory of the conversation gave him. But, it seemed true enough. Rush despite his complete lack of compassion for anyone else involved had been attempting to get Young to deal with the situation. He was not entirely sure how he felt about that. He was certain it would not have occurred to him that way before TJ had pointed it out.

He shifted slightly so the sleeping man was more comfortably resting against him and tried to sleep. The sound and feeling of Rush breathing against him was soporific though and he found himself dropping into sleep before he expected.

_Young stood on the beach and watched the waves lapping at the shore. The sand under his bare feet was hot, baked to an almost uncomfortable temperature by the sun overhead. He wandered down to the waves letting them wash over his toes, the water and the damp sand cooling his skin. He could hear voices as crew played in the water somewhere to his right, Chloe shrieking, Scott and Greer laughing. Turning his head to his left he watched as Rush dove cleanly from the rock into the sea. The water seemed like a good idea and not bothering to remove t shirt or underpants he waded slowly through the waves into the water._

_It was warm, but soothing after the hot sun and as he waded out past the waves breaking on the shore, sloped only shallowly so he had to walk some way before it was finally chest height. He let it buoy him up off his feet, floating, staring at tiny white puffs of clouds and the lizard-birds circling above him. The warm water relaxed him, floating his clothes gently around him, loosening tight muscles, comforting him, so warm, softly rocking him…_

…he awoke to the last fading pleasurable pulses of orgasm, wrapped warmly in blankets and Rush's arms, pressed against Rush's hip.

He pulled his groin away from the other man quickly, away from the continuing stimulus of pressure and the risk of the damp evidence of his recent ejaculation soaking through onto the other man. A breath left his throat in shuddering pulses as he tried to let out some of the tension, trying hard not to think about what had just happened. He shifted against Rush's arms, trying to extricate himself without waking him, and failing as Rush shifted with a huff of air and a "Wh..?"

"Bathroom." He said, his voice sounding breathy and strained to him.

Rush just made an affirmative grunt and let go. He rolled out of bed, walking to the counter and picking up his only other pair of underpants before dragging on pants and slipping out of the room. In the bathroom he stripped, wet the soiled underpants and used them to wipe himself down before quickly redressing and rinsing out the dirty underwear. He caught sight of himself in the mirror, sweaty and flushed, regarding himself with a guilty frown. The dream had honestly seemed pretty innocuous, nice, relaxing, pleasant.

Right up to the point where he woke up coming, realising his unconscious self had evidently been rubbing off against Rush. _No. Wrong._ Really do _not_ think that _._

"Just a firm, convenient surface." He told his reflection.

 _Warm, and cuddling you too._ No!

He leaned back, letting his head fall back to rest against the wall with a thud. He could not look at himself in the mirror anymore, it was not helping. It had been a dream. A nice dream. It had not been about having sex with anyone in particular. It was just his body  getting a bit of release.

And it was not surprising it was feeling like that. He knew exactly the last time he had actually had sex in his own body, and it was on Icarus. TJ had, tragically, been able to date it very accurately for him. No wonder his…whatever…was feeling a little underutilised. Stress, overwork, lack of sleep and poor diet had all combined to make his libido go into hibernation, but it appeared with the good food from the foraging and sufficient sleep it was still in there somewhere, available to his sleeping subconscious at least. The stray thought occurred to him that he probably ought to resort to his hand a little more. Maybe then this wouldn't happen again.

The idea of getting back into bed with Rush bothered him. He was frankly paranoid that his sleeping body, previously trustworthy and just interested in warm company, would betray him again. But he was getting cold and he couldn't stay here any longer and if he wanted his bed then Rush was in it and he would just have to deal with it. He scrubbed at his hair with his hand and walked out and back to bed.

Rush looked up sleepily from the pillow as he walked back in, hair tousled in a bird's nest and eyes beady bright in the brief light from the corridor. He closed the hatch behind him and the room went dark, letting him walk across the cold floor, hang damp underwear on the back of the chair by touch and slide into bed without Rush seeing his embarrassment. Rush mumbled something that sounded like he was complaining about how cold Young was but was pretty much already asleep as he wound limbs round Young's cold form and relaxed back into full slumber.

Young lay there tense. This was too strange and he had not seen it coming. He had come pressed into Rush's hip, he had dreamed and his body had come pressed against Rush. The man who was breathing softly against his chest, heavy and relaxed against him and when had that happened? When had it become normal for the acerbic bastard to fail to wake up in favour of grumbling and sleepily curling round Young without a thought? When had spooning for company moved over to them falling into bed and wrapping themselves together?

He realised that they had not simply spooned for the last few times they had slept together. Okay, they were both lonely, single and apparently desperate for company and most times they fell into bed together one or both of them was physically exhausted, or already asleep, but it seemed to be getting further from anything he could have conceived. He knew they had agreed on the planet that this was helpful, that they both needed the company but in the space of an evening they had gone from a pretty savage argument, to being wrapped up in bed together to him having a wet dream almost all over Rush. Wrong, very wrong.

Rush shifted against him, beard scraping over Young's arm. Young tried to settle but lay there for a long while before he finally fell asleep.

When he woke in the morning, Rush was already gone, no sign that he had ever been there. When he reached out the bed was cold on the other side so he had been gone some time. Young found himself curiously disappointed. He sat on the bed, staring at the wedding ring that was sitting on the counter for a long while, before getting up, washing, dressing and walking out without giving it a further look.

xxxoooxxx

With the two main breaches fixed, Young had ordered a couple of days of downtime, taking the main participants off active duty. The science team apparently were all working on some sort of programming issue or translations and Camile was holding "management training" with Scott, TJ and James, in the infirmary for want of anywhere better to run it. Young had acquiesced to her "suggestion", it would be helpful in the long run and supported his suggestions for promotions.

He had chosen not to participate in the current session of her syllabus on negotiation skills. Camile had asked him to speak to the group as well, but she was much better qualified than he to discuss negotiation. She had already scheduled him in later for other sessions, but this one…this one he had declined.

He sighed as he walked down the corridor towards the mess. Being honest with himself there was no way he could be in the same room as TJ for that long. He was avoiding TJ as much as he was avoiding Rush. That was easy enough with the downtime. Young himself was catching up on reports and checking in with various members of the crew, TJ was training with Camile and Rush was…somewhere. Not visible at any rate.

He had only seen him a couple of times since they had last slept in the same bed. Rush was his usual brisk and focussed self, arriving once with a demand to borrow Barnes for some piece of work, acting completely as if there was no secret and hidden contact between them, no shifting boundaries of interaction, despite the fact they were alone in a room. Young had acquiesced, mainly to end the conversation as soon as possible and Rush had left immediately. He had been on the bridge for his scheduled shift and Young had seen him once, striding down a corridor towards the core room looking typically grim faced. They still had not talked about the argument.

Young ate dinner with Greer and Scott who was talking at length about the training session earlier. Young asked a few pertinent questions, and gave a few anonymous examples of personnel issues from previous commands which illustrated issues that Camile had raised. Greer was making some pretty good points and asking some intelligent questions and Young decided to get Camile to include him in the next session.

"It's just like when…" Scott's enthusiasm was genuine as he rattled on. Smiling at his second in command, Young allowed himself to be drawn into the debate. It was an entertaining enough way to spend the evening.

He gave up about ten in the evening when the conversation swapped to a blow by blow account of a basketball match that Greer had seen on his last trip to Earth and apparently memorised. Basketball was fine enough when you played yourself or watched a real match, but Young did not like it enough to want to listen to that much discussion. He wandered off, a little at a loose end, deciding to check in with the bridge crew.

Halfway to the bridge Young found Rush kneeling on the floor half buried in a conduit. He stopped briefly, watching Rush slide out a hand and feel around for one of the Ancient decoupling tools that loosened standard components like squingies.

"Pass me the decoupler." Rush said without looking to see who it was and reaching a hand out behind him, evidently demanding the requested item.

Young picked it up and put it in the extended hand. He took a breath, wondering whether he should just move on given how well their last actual conversation had gone.

"What are you doing?" He asked as the hand disappeared back into the hole in the wall.

Rush spoke without turning, his voice hollow from within the wall cavity. "Rerouting a communications link."

"What? Sensors?"

"No, Eli has an idea that we will be able to use the systems Destiny already has in place with a little alteration to enable us to use our existing, largely useless, mobile phones with the communications system." There was a grating noise and a thunk and Rush's hand appeared again with a component. It waved a moment. "Well, take it!"

Young took the component and put it down on the floor next to Rush.

"He thinks he can at minimum enable text messages." Rush continued. "He's spent his spare time in the last two weeks getting limited connectivity between his mobile phone and the ship's systems."

There were more grating noises and a few hard clicks, sounding like Rush was installing components.

"How?" Young asked.

"Bluetooth." Rush said shortly. "That little blue logo that comes up on your phone and drains your battery if you leave it on by mistake. His laptop has a Bluetooth dongle which he has now connected to Destiny in the Core Interface Room. It has a very limited range, about 25 metres with the bulkheads in the way, but he thinks we can boost the signal and we think we can also potentially enable some better sort of wifi for wifi-enabled devices by altering or adding to the system the kino remotes use."

Rush pulled himself out of the conduit and stood, turning to face Young. There was a greasy smudge of dirt on his cheek and without thinking Young reached out absently and rubbed it away with his thumb. For a second they froze, Young's hand on Rush's cheek, Rush staring at him, then Young pulled his hand away and spoke quickly.

"What's the difference?" Young asked.

"What?" Rush seemed a little distracted for a second.

"Between Bluetooth and wifi." Young clarified, sliding a half step away from Rush, out of his personal space.

"In language you can understand?"

Young gave him a frustrated look.

Rush snorted. "In language you can understand the systems speak a different language. It's like one system is talking English and the other Chinese. Different languages."

Young thought about this. "Isn't Eli's laptop already connected to the kinos? And you've been downloading database information to your laptop and stuff to TJs too."

"We have direct connections between some of the laptops and Destiny, have managed to get our systems to understand her in a limited way, but those are static, plugged in." He shrugged. "The Bluetooth has a number of usable devices, but they're of limited use," he shifted a little putting himself a little more in Young's personal space, apparently without noticing as he was pulling out his mobile phone, "mostly mobile phones, but with Eli's dongle we have a ready made transmitter, putting it simply."

Young nodded, looking down at where Rush was turning the mobile phone over and over in his long fingers. "And the wifi?"

"We have a reasonably significant number of wifi enabled devices including two e-book readers, some phones, a dozen or more mp3 players as well as all of the laptops. But we would need to reprogram the kino remote system to transmit in a manner the devices can pick up and to either program that system to speak the right language or teach our devices to understand the kino system." He looked up and gave a one shouldered shrug. "It would mean that we would be able to use some of Destiny's systems to share our stored data and potentially have kino remotes interact with our devices."

Young nodded. "Sounds good."

"It gives me something to do in my spare time." Rush said sarcastically.

"Is there anything I can do?" Young offered. Rush seemed surprised and maybe a little suspicious. Young wondered momentarily himself what his own motivations for that were. Guilt probably.

"Let me know if any of your soldiers has a communications specialism," Rush said tipping his head slightly sideways to regard Young still a little suspiciously, "and free them up to work with Doctor Alexander on the roll out of the system. I have her working on understanding Destiny's current communications technology, but it's slow going as Park is the only Ancient speaker I can spare to translate."

"I'll see what I can do."

"Well, you've got a few days as I'm back on the planet from the day after tomorrow."

Young nodded. "Okay. I'll do that." Young walked away, wondering why he felt like he had dodged a bullet. Damn any agreement they had made, he needed to keep his distance, get a grip on himself, try to regain normality as far as was possible living on Destiny.

xxxoooxxx

The next day seemed normal enough. The science team was apparently in a planning session for the next series of repairs and were camped out in the core interface room. James, Barnes and Calvos were manning the bridge and a number of crew were undertaking a referencing project in the large storage area. Every different kind of part was being photographed, logged on a database and a reference number fingerpainted on the side of the crate with some home made whitewash someone had created. With a large number of crew on shore leave the inhabited area was very quiet.

Young spent the morning ferrying another group of crew to Down Below, as Scott was on leave, and the afternoon reading the brief exploration and foraging reports from the returning crew and an updated stores report from Becker and Inman once the Shuttle was unloaded. Tomorrow he was scheduled for a briefing on Earth and the following three days was his assigned shore leave, and he noted a few recommendations for amendments to foraging priorities while he was away, signed off the suggestions and rubbing his eyes, went to find dinner.

Dinner was cold boiled grains, salad and a little cold meat left over from the previous day. Not too bad, the fresh vegetables were very welcome and would only be available for the time they were here so Becker appeared to be making the most of them. He had never really understood Emily's seemingly unlimited variety of teas, herbal teas and chais, tea was tea. And was not coffee which was more important to his mind. However, when it was all you had to drink but water, you began to welcome some variety. Today's tea was vaguely sweet, berry flavoured and a warm orange colour. He picked up a mug to go with his meal and walked over to take a seat at a table with Ramirez and Cho who were apparently talking about writing, and Greer who was giving his own meal some serious attention. He slid into an empty spot on the opposite end from Greer, nodded to the others politely and got down to the serious business of eating.

Focussed on his meal he hadn't noticed Rush walk into the mess hall until he walked directly into Young's field of vision. Rush stepped up to him and leaned down to speak quietly and privately.

"Are you on all my shore leaves?" Rush's question surprised Young.

"Yeah." He replied awkwardly.

"Why?" Rush asked.

Young was thrown by the question. Rush did not seem angry, more curious. He shrugged. "I don't know." Young admitted. "I can't say anything more than that. It was a spur of the moment thing, and once I'd asked Camile to do it, I couldn't rethink it."

"Would you change it?"

"If you want me to." Young said fairly, looking at him. He knew he had put Rush in a position, not given him any choice in the matter. Rush was silent. "If it would make you more comfortable...I can get her to change it."

"No." Rush said finally. "I can live with it." He gave Young the quirk of his lip that served as a half smile. "I need to be on the bridge." And he was gone.

Young sighed and went back to his dinner. He looked up as Greer moved up the bench and sat down opposite.

"You okay?" Greer asked. "Looked like Rush was getting in your face about something."

Young gave him a surprised look. "No, he just wanted to check something."

Greer chuckled. "Way he came in and got in your face I thought he was gonna have a go about something."

"No, it was a personnel issue" Not entirely a lie. "I suppose he didn't want to raise his voice too much."

Greer nodded. "Ah, fair enough."

xxxoooxxx

Rush cornered him again as he was leaving the observation lounge later in the evening. He was walking from the direction of the core room and fell into step with Young as he walked towards his quarters.

"We need to talk." Rush said bluntly.

For a moment Young thought he was about to ask Young about what had happened two nights before and some discomfort must have shown in his face as Rush gave him a strange look before continuing.

"What about?" Young had intended the question to sound firm, but his voice just sounded tired and a little fed up to him.

"We're on shore leave for three days and there's repairs that need to be done while we're gone. I need you to sign off your end of it so your soldiers will do their assigned tasks."

Young slowed his pace and shot a glance at Rush and raised an eyebrow at the implication that the civilians would get on with it anyway without his permission.

Rush scowled. "It's all in the original work plan, but no doubt you'll want the details." He said sourly. "Can we discuss it tomorrow?"

"I have another briefing." Young said. "I'll be back after."

"Will Telford be there?" Rush asked pointedly.

"Probably."

Rush looked around briefly at the empty corridor before speaking again. "Will you sort out the financial issues with Emily?"

"I don't know. Why do you even care?"

Rush looked at him a little darkly. "I don't like unfinished business, it…grates on my nerves."

"It isn't _your_ unfinished business." Young snapped back.

Rush scowled at him. "It has an impact on your effectiveness, _Colonel._ "

Young did not miss the emphasis on his rank and role. He stopped and stared at Rush. "Is that your only concern?"  He asked roughly.

Rush was quiet for a moment, looking intently at Young's face. "I'd like to think," Rush said quietly, "that we'd at least some semblance of a friendship developing, considering it seems we spend at least one night a week in the same bed. I'd be a pretty poor friend if I didn't at least try and give you good advice."

Young sighed. "I was gonna reply by email. Tell her to send the papers care of Homeworld Command."

Rush frowned. "And Telford?"

Young fought the urge to glower at Rush and tell him to get lost, although probably in stronger language. "He'll be there tomorrow." Young admitted. "But I'm damn sure he's going to behave himself. O'Neill is chairing the briefing." Young started walking towards his quarters again and Rush followed.

"The main focus of this one is a briefing on the repairs?" Rush asked as he caught up.

Young nodded giving Rush a suspicious look. "There'll be a quick discussion of crew and supplies, but mainly they'll be interested in your repairs and discoveries. Did you brief Eli?"

Rush nodded back in response. "He know's what's going on. I'll make sure he's in the right place at the right time Colonel."

"You better warn him that Gutierrez is likely to be there." Young said. "But he does fine. He's always positive and O'Neill likes him."

Rush snorted. "That doesn't surprise me."

Young chuckled, and the tension lifted minutely.

They walked on a few more paces and Young pulled up as he reached the entrance to his quarters, reaching out for the door release. He rested his fingers on the bulkhead over the button without pressing it. "Well, I better get some sleep." He felt himself waiting to see whether Rush would want to invite himself in. He glanced at Rush with a querying look, trying to suppress any expression of anxiety from showing on his face as he looked at him. In the three or four seconds before Rush spoke, Young felt his anxiety surge. His thoughts sticking unpleasantly at the risk of another embarrassing incident after their last night in the same bed.

"I've got some long range sensor readings Volker ran, looking at options for mining in the system, that I need to check before I go to bed." Rush said. "I'll not keep from your bed any longer. Sleep well." He said wryly and he walked off.

Young's tension dissipated. He let out a quiet sigh of relief and let himself into his quarters.

xxxoooxxx

Young walked into the stones room. Dunning was waiting by the stones but there was no sign of Eli.

"Where's Eli?"

"Not here yet sir."

Young checked his watch. "He's not that late yet."

There were footsteps in the corridor, and Rush walked in.

Young gave him a distrustful look. "Where's Eli."

"On the bridge." Rush said.

"He's meant to be here."

"I thought, being as you always tell me they ask why I won't come back to the briefings I thought I'd make an appearance."

"You better not be planning..." Young stopped abruptly, unwilling to discuss his concerns further in front of Dunning.

"I can assure you, Colonel, I plan to be well behaved. This is simply an appearance to stop them becoming further concerned about my non-appearance." Rush's voice was that blend of pleasant and slightly condescending that irritated the hell out of Young.

He glared at Rush, but stepped up to the stones plate. "Come on then."

xxxoooxxx

Rush opened his eyes in the stones room at Homeworld Command. He looked in the mirror and scowled when he realised he was in the body of one of Gutierrez minions. Young, next to him was in the body of a second.

Young stood and turned giving his name and number. Rush stood slower, turned and gave his name. The soldier in front of them nodded and led them out.

"They're ready for you in the conference room. Although I was told it would be you and Eli Wallace, Colonel."

Rush watched Young's face, neutral and pleasant, as he responded. "Doctor Rush managed to free some time to attend the briefing."

The conference room was large and airless, the off-white painted walls looking oddly pale and bright after Destiny's metal bulkheads. The long conference table, dark shiny wood, was completely filled with personnel, except for two chairs halfway down one side. Young walked straight in, but Rush paused in the doorway. He recognised Telford, O'Neill, Gutierrez, two IOA representatives and few other scienntists.

"Everett, Mr Wallace." O'Neill greeted them.

"It's Rush." Rush said.

He noted the looks of surprise from around the table, a vague scowl from Telford and a frank look of surprise from Gutierrez. He smiled wolfishly at Telford and ignored Gutierrez.

"Good to see you Doctor Rush." O'Neill said. "Grab a coffee."

He walked over to the side table, pouring himself and Young a coffee and sat down at the last chair, in between Young and an older woman he didn't recognise.

"Nicholas." The woman said pleasantly.

He looked at her, trying to work out when he had met her, but watched as she caught herself.

"Oh dear." She said quietly with an apologetic smile. "It's Susannah."

Realisation dawned and he smiled back in genuine pleasure, committing her real face to memory. He guessed she was in her early sixties, but looked fit and active. Her long grey hair was plaited and rolled and pinned into a large bun at the nape of her neck. Her skin was clear, and her blue eyes quirked with a smile at his scrutiny. She was almost certainly taller than he was and was wearing a classy soft grey pant suit with a cream silk blouse.

"Am I what you expected?" She asked.

He tilted his head in amusement and was about to speak when O'Neill spoke from the head of the table.

"Okay people, if we can get started."

The meeting was equally as boring as Rush had anticipated. Most of the time he had managed to avoid these meetings, although he and Young had both attended them on a regular basis via the stones from Icarus. There was a long discussion about the supplies and crew status which Rush paid only vague attention to, followed by a short discussion of the status of various families connected to the crew which Rush ignored completely until the discussion finally turned to the repairs.

"Doctor Rush, if you could give us a brief run down of the repairs and work your team are currently undertaking?"

Rush took a deep swallow of coffee and paused before starting.

"The main focus at the moment is the peripheral areas around the dome..." he started.

"I thought you were working on the cold area?" Telford asked.

"We were," Rush said, "but now that we have a source of dome panels we have changed to working on the dome."

"You didn't mention you had a source of dome panels." One of the scientists spoke up, a chubby man with thick hair scraped back into a long pony tail and a navy blue suit.

"Colonel Telford was made aware that we have been working on the seedship," Rush said smoothly, "requesting it to undertake mining and construction in it's manufactory."

Young nodded beside him. "The dome, now that it is possible to repair it, has to be the main project." He added. "That is if we want to eat. At the moment it needs to be the main focus of Doctor Rush's science team."

"Requesting? You say you are requesting the seedship to undertake tasks?" The same scientist spoke again.

"The seedship has an AI, like Destiny, it is capable of decision making and planning it's own work schedule. Being as none of us is currently able to successfully programme the seedship to undertake specific tasks," Rush said disingenuously, "we are _requesting_ it undertake tasks and leaving it to the AI to plan the details and order it undertakes them in."

"Can't you simply order it? Programme exactly what you need?" The scientist looked intent and rather aggressively focussed. "Isn't your course of action risky on your limited timescales? What if it doesn't do what you want?"

 _Yes I probably could programme it, but I'm not admitting that to you. Not yet at least._ "So far it has proved extremely effective, and if you'll cast your mind back to what I said about five seconds ago," Rush said acidly, "No-one is able to programme the seed ship anyway." The lie fell easily from his mouth. "So our current option is to let the seedship know what we need and let it provide it. Does that answer your question?"

The scientist glowered and started writing notes on his pad, Rush assumed the man had given  up.

"As I was saying," Rush continued, "we are currently working on the area around the dome. When the dome blew out, it unfortunately overloaded a significant number of systems in the area. We are in the process of replacing those systems as far as we can, in order that the dome can be made functional once the ceiling is replaced."

There were a few murmured conversations before Gutierrez spoke up. "What does that involve Doctor Rush?"

"Life support systems, ventilation and heating, power conduits, sensor conduits and some structural repairs." Rush said succinctly. "Structural repairs first, then power as the others evidently rely on it, then sensors and finally life support."

"Why are the sensors more important than the life support?"

 _Why are you bothering to ask this?_ Rush thought. _This is information you should know. What's your angle here?_ He answered anyway, waiting to see where Gutierrez was going with this line of enquiry. "Because the life support systems use the sensors to function at the appropriate levels and because we also don't want crew in the area until it has been certified safe for use." Rush said flatly. "I _appreciate_ that many people at this table don't want to hear me go into detail about the functioning of those systems in this general briefing, but I'm sure I can find _someone_ with enough time to explain it to you next time you visit Destiny."

Gutierrez glared, his expression suggesting to Rush he would quite happily stab Rush with the pen that was clenched in his hand.

Telford leaned forward on the table, the movement catching everyone's attention, smiling openly in a way that made Rush distrustful. "So you're actively keeping the rest of the crew out of this area, only _your_ _own_ staff are able to access the area." He asked Rush.

Rush did not miss the slight emphasis in Telford's statement. That was where Gutierrez was going.

"It does function to keep staff who are not aware of the dangers out of the area, yes." He said easily. "We wouldn't want people to unwittingly place themselves at risk."

He took another mouthful of coffee, it was awful but it was coffee, and waited for Telford to continue.

"So you have completely ceased work on the cold area?"

"Not entirely." Rush said. "We are still undertaking some preparatory work towards that project."

"But I thought Colonel Young said that the dome project needed to be the main focus of your team. Wasn't that the main orders for your team."

Rush wondered why O'Neill had not intervened in the discussion yet, he glanced up the table, catching O'Neill's eye. O'Neill raised an eyebrow momentarily. Rush pulled his gaze quickly back to Telford, sitting back in his chair and pressing his hands together in front of him.

"I'm aware from my visits to Destiny and conversations my staff have had with your staff as well as other crew that your team put a high priority on the work that you want to undertake in the cold area."

"I'm sorry Colonel Telford. I'll admit I don't always get on with Colonel Young and we've had our problems." Telford didn't even try to stifle the sharp laugh. "But in the interests of us all staying alive another year we've had to some to some accommodations, and that means Colonel Young respects my professional judgement and I don't try and undermine his command structure."

"However annoying you find it." Telford said.

"I don't have to like it, I just have to work within it. Undermining his command is counterproductive in the long run. Hence our primary focus is currently the dome, but when time permits we undertake some additional work towards addressing the cold area." Rush snapped. "Now, it would be considerably more positive if _you_ could desist from running around behind his back also." Rush felt more than saw Young tense next to him and Telford appeared to blanch. "And while you're at it, desist from having your scientists attempt to do the same with mine. I have enough problems without having to deal with you trying to undermine the command structure on Destiny when we're trying to _stay alive._ "

Telford's face was a picture of suppressed fury, Gutierrez had blanched and then gone blank and at the far end of the table O'Neill leaned forward and said amiably. "I'm sure that isn't the case Doctor Rush."

Rush however did not miss the quick glance O'Neill shot at Telford though. Next to him, Young was still tensed. Rush moved his leg minutely so his knee brushed up against Young's and felt him jump slightly, but in his peripheral vision, the man shifted his shoulders and appeared to settle.

"And on that note." O'Neill said. "I suggest we break for lunch before the meeting splits to science and personnel groups."O'Neill stood, effectively cutting off any further discussion "You have two hours. Use it to calm down. I'll see everyone back here at two thirty."

xxxoooxxx

The assembled group started to stream out of the room. Young reached out and grabbed Rush by the arm before he could escape. The other man was almost vibrating with the irritation that was pouring off of him. He shifted his grip to Rush's bicep and turned Rush towards him.

"Come on, let's go get a coffee and some lunch."

Rush scowled, flipping hair out of his face that was not there in this body.

"Tea." He snapped.

"Tea? I thought you drank coffee?"

"I want a fucking cup of tea, in a mug, not in a fucking plastic beaker.  And it's going to be brown and have milk in it. No bloody lemon. We are getting out of this place and you are taking me somewhere that does tea. Real tea."

Young stared at him. "You want me to take you out for tea."

"I can go on my own if you want."

"Would you come back?" Young asked him

Rush glared at him.

"Where are we supposed to get tea round here?"

"I don't know, I never come here." Rush shuffled his papers in order and slid them back in the folder.

"Come on." Young sighed. "I'll ask."

"Daniel dragged me to some place once."

They both turned in surprise as O'Neill walked up behind them. He took the pen out of Rush's hand and stole a sheet of notes from the half open folder. He leaned on the table, scribbling directions on the back.

"Enjoy." O'Neill advised them. "You get out little enough as it is. Chill out and I'll see you in a couple hours." His gaze was on Rush.

He clapped Young on the shoulder and walked out.

"Come on, I need five minutes to check my email." Young told Rush.

"Afterwards, you can do that later before we leave."

Young looked at Rush, reading the expression on his face and folded. "Fine. Come on, you're here because of me, I can at least get you a decent cup of tea."

The place recommended looked like a coffee shop from the outside. Rush eyed the place suspiciously. Young had not had the occasion to see Rush in anyone else's body before, though he had strong memories of Telford in Rush's body. Rush's expressions and mannerisms were still obvious, even in the body of a scientist ten years younger than him, six inches taller and a double handful of pounds more solidly built. It was slightly odd looking up at him though, as the man whose body Young had borrowed was not much taller than Rush in real life, if about half as wide again at the shoulders than Rush's slight build.

"I'm not going to walk around looking for anywhere else now we're here." Young said. "Come on." He walked in, knowing Rush would follow him.

The coffee shop was quite busy at lunchtime. They walked up to the counter, waiting their turn. The young man behind the counter had a local accent, but when the older woman serving behind the counter spoke to him, her accent was obviously British, although Young would not have been able to hazard a guess where she was from.

"Where's she from?" He asked Rush. "Can you tell?"

"With that accent?" Rush gave him an incredulous look. "O' course I can."

Young gave him a quizzical look.

"From Newcastle." Rush said as if it was self evident.

Young turned back to the counter as they made it to the front of the queue. "I'll have a large coffee and a tuna salad. He'll have a tea."

Rush cut in. "I'll have a large pot of tea, and milk."

Young rolled his eyes.

The woman obviously heard his accent as she grinned and walked over. "Proper tea no doubt. I can do you toast and marmite as well." She offered. "Or scones and jam."

"Scones please and a bacon sandwich with thick white bread and ketchup if you've got it."

"It's no trouble." She said. "I'll bring it all over."

"Thank you."

Young looked at Rush who had suddenly become polite. Rush scowled at him.

"I thought you drank coffee. You were always drinking coffee." Young said as they found a table.

"I like American coffee better than American tea." Rush said. "And I like caffeine."

"There's not as much caffeine in tea." Young said.

"Depends on how you make it." Rush said darkly taking a seat.

The woman came over moments later with a tray, putting Young's coffee in front of him and placing a large brown china pot of tea, a jug of milk, a sugar bowl and a mug in front of Rush. He sipped his coffee as Rush put milk in the mug then poked around inside the teapot with a spoon before pouring himself a mug of tea that was practically orange in colour.

"That looks vile." Young told him.

"Shut up and let me drink it." Rush's tone brooked no response and it was evident he was in no mood to talk. He took a sip. "It's fucking perfect."

 

xxxoooxxx

After watching Rush in deep communion with a pot of tea and a bacon sandwich, a lunch time which had been largely silent, although surprisingly not too uncomfortable, they had returned to Homeworld Command. Young had attended the personnel briefing and Rush the science briefing. Unsurprisingly the personnel briefing was shorter, but it had been followed up by a long private discussion with O'Neill where he had been considerably less circumspect about certain issues than he had in the briefing.

Young was not sure what had happened in the science briefing. He knew that Gutierrez had come storming in at the end of the personnel briefing to talk urgently to Telford in a corner and when he had found Rush after his chat with O'Neill, Rush appeared to be in an excellent mood, deep in animated discussion with a scientist Young thought was called Jones.

"You done?" He asked Rush when Rush noticed his arrival.

Rush nodded and Young waited a few moments as he finished up with the now effusive Doctor Jones.

"What was all that?" He asked Rush as they walked away. "Gutierrez came running to Telford looking like you'd just stolen his candy."

"Gutierrez wants to know how the manufactory works." Rush said. "He's entirely focussed on that."

"Okay." Young said, "Is that a problem?"

"Gutierrez wants to know how it makes stargates." Rush sounded irritated. "But even if we get a grip on how to programme it, it'll be a long time before we understand how it does that. He tried to take over the briefing to get me to explain what I know about the manufactory." His eyes flicked down to the small notebook in his hand, Young wondered where the hell he had acquired one in such a short space of time.

Young gave him a curious look. "Why didn't you want to tell him?"

"Firstly I don't like him," Rush said with a snort, "and secondly if I let him get started on that he'll never let up. There's a _lot_ more useful things that they can use immediately. Like the recipe for the dome glass. Jones is working on the latest ship at Area 51. The dome glass is better than anything they've got at the moment. I'm five years out of date on what they're building, but I know they don't have anything as good as that." His lip twitched with amusement, "I redirected the conversation, and as soon as they realised what I was talking about one of his colleagues had Doctor Jones beamed across from Area 51 by some ship or other to take notes on the content and process."

Young laughed. "Is it going to help?"

"Help?" Rush said incredulously. "It's going to change the way they build the ships. It's just increased the area they can put to windows five fold, it's that much stronger and more heat resistant than what they're using. You'll be getting a request for Doctor Jones to come and view the remains of the dome." He flipped a page in the notebook. "He's zero G certified though."

Young was genuinely impressed with Rush's manipulation of the science team, though it occurred to him to muse how often he himself had been offered an alternative to distract him from his original plan.

"Luckily I remembered the recipe." Rush said.

Young wondered if Rush had memorised it deliberately. Probably, although whether it was altruism or simply to put off Gutierrez he wasn't sure. He thought it was probably a combination of the both. Rush disliked Gutierrez, but Young thought Rush would have wanted something useful as as distraction, something productive. Rush seemed to abhor time wasters. Or at least those who he personally viewed as wasting his time. "I didn't realise you had got that far into the system." Young said

Rush shrugged, looking up from the notebook. "Dome panels, bulkhead and hull panels are probably the simplest things the manufactory makes, one substance, one piece, straightforward shape. If everything else was as simple as that I'd be building another shuttle." He gave a sour laugh.

"You can do that?" Young asked surprised, slightly more loudly than he had intended.

Rush scowled. "No." He admitted. "I can't. Not yet. I've managed to identify a limited number of parts the manufactory is capable of making, all of them made of a single substance, because I've been able to identify the substance in question. I've also identified squingies,"  the word was said with some distaste, "because it was making them when we were there, so I could see what the computer said it was making."

Young laughed.

"I _think_ ," said Rush shooting him a glare, _"once_ I work out how it defines dimensions, I'll be able to get it to make a limited number of useful objects as long as they're made of one substance."

"Like what?"

"Glass jars and bottles for starters."

Young stared at him.

Rush gave him a withering look. "Lieutenant Johansen is storing _medicines_ in washed out shampoo bottles." he said. "And silica is common and easy to get hold of. It also doesn't matter if that goes wrong. The last thing I'm gonna be doing is testing the process on something important that can fail at an inopportune moment, am I?"

Young nodded, it made sense. "Look," he said, "I need to write that email."

"Fine, I can wait." Rush said.

"You don't have to." Young replied. "You can go back."

"It won't take you five minutes." Rush said. "I can wait. I ought to check my own, it's been a while."

"How long?"

"Five years."

Young laughed. "Why am I not surprised."

"I've had better things to do." Rush said flatly.

Young tilted his head and looked at him. "Isn't there anyone you wanted to stay in touch with? You said, when you said about your..." he made a vague gesture to Rush's scar, "uh, accident, that you had family."

Rush gave him a cold look. "Not that I've been in contact with for a good while." He said. His tone made it clear this was not a topic he wanted to discuss. Young gave him a quizzical look, but left it.

"No friends that will miss you?"

"No." Rush said. "I should check on a few financial matters myself though."

Young found O'Neill's secretary and arranged with the man for access to a couple of computers. The man found them a room with three desks in, Young handed over his own papers for storage till he came back and watched as Rush bundled his notes and the small notebook and gave them to the secretary who put them in a box file labelled "Dr N Rush" and left them to it.

"You get your own box file now." Young noted. "Intending to come back?"

Rush gave him a sideways look from here he sat at the other desk.

"Now I have a reason to," Rush said pointedly, "yes. Dr Jones wants some input on the dome glass and working with him reduces the time Gutierrez gets on Destiny." Rush said with malice.

"I had no idea the world of science was so emotionally charged." Young said.

Rush ignored him in favour of logging on to the computer.

Young logged in and sat there, slowly constructing an email to Emily. It took him a while, and he reread it a couple of times to ensure it read business like and polite enough, the last thing he needed was more hassle with lawyers.

Rush was still working at the computer opposite and Young read through the last email from his youngest brother, giving the collated family gossip and some photographs of his nieces and nephews. He composed a reply, giving general news he was well, a very vague paragraph noting there had been technical problems around his latest posting and he was having to wrestle with engineers, and that typically the heating had gone out and they'd all been double bunking till it was fixed. Having told them it had once again been a problem in his last email, he added his bad knee was getting better again. The email looked a little short still so he wrote that he was finally getting on better with the lead civilian on his command and that miraculously the food was improving. It looked enough.

He checked it, making sure it contained nothing of any real import, but would satisfy their need for news and sent it, knowing it would be screened anyway. His brother knew that for undisclosed reasons lines of communication were sketchy and would forward it on to the rest of the family. He really ought to see about getting at least one of them read into the programme, but they were used to his "overseas" postings and classified work and after Emily, well he was not sure seeing them in someone else's body as worth it. Better to keep in touch by email.

He looked up. Rush was evidently finished and was watching him.

"You alright?"

"I emailed Emily." Young said, a little sharply. "It's done."

"Good. Are you alright?" Rush repeated.

Young turned off the computer. "Yes, I'm alright, I'm not going to have a meltdown or anything." He stood. "Are you done?"

Rush nodded.

"Lets go home then." Young said.

Rush gave him a quizzical look.

"What?" Young demanded, beginning to be a little irritated.

"Home?" Rush asked.

"Yes." Young said. "Destiny. Home."

Rush looked at him, Young knew what he was thinking and wanted to say something cutting to shut him up, stop any smug comments, but Rush simply nodded once. "Home then." He said.


	21. Touch

It was about five in the evening when they opened their eyes in the stones room on Destiny. Rush disappeared immediately without a word or backward glance. With a slightly rueful shake of his head Young followed him out the door. He went to his quarters and caught up on paperwork for an hour, got some dinner then went through a briefing with Scott and Camile and packed his bag ready for his shore leave. Rush was still as elusive as usual and Young had no idea where he was. He sat and made notes on the briefing at Homeworld Command for Camile and giving up for the evening stripped and slid into bed.

It seemed large and cold and he had to stifle a sudden flare of anxiety. He and Rush would be sharing a shelter and a bed again on Big River and an even smaller bed than usual. If his body betrayed him again there was a much greater chance it would be obvious. He tried to rationalise his thoughts, telling himself about human nature, involuntary reactions and dreaming. It still took him a long while to go to sleep.

A slightly hurried handover before he left through the stargate, followed by a long day of physical labour on the planet kept most of the worries out of his mind though. They were ranging out from the camp in small groups this time to forage for supplies of three different things, a kind of nut, some red berries and a plant which had a leafy top which was good for salad and a white edible root. Calvos had evidently been hard at work as they were now outfitted with large baskets on shoulder straps to collect their supplies in and could carry a good amount before needing to return to off load.

He was in a group with Rush, Calvos and Barnes, following the river in one direction on the far bank, the closer bank having already been foraged out. Mostly they were finding the nut trees and roots. This planet luckily appeared to be at the height of it's growing season, unlike Thick Woods, where the forage was mainly meat, leafy products and some roots and bark as it was early summer there. They made two or three trips, each time walking further up the river, striking out from it until it was almost invisible then coming back. The nut trees were along the banks of the river itself, but the rooted plants and the berries on low bushes were found out in the grasslands often in small clumps that were visible from the river.

Rush had not said much to him, but although Young was not exactly ignoring him or avoiding him, he was staying busy, ensuring there were not many opportunities for conversation. Rush did not appear to notice, or if he did he had not said anything about it. Everything was going fine so far at least.

They stopped for lunch after the third trip. Inman was sorting the haul into crates and nets in the now hard packed dirt area between the shelters.

"How are we doing?" Young asked her, lowering himself to the ground next to her carefully, so as not to drop his food.

"We're doing very well on the nuts and the leaves. I'd like more of the berries, but we seem to have harvested out the area around the stargate." She regarded the crate of berries in front of her and looked up. "They freeze well though." She said. "We should have berries for some time, won't need to eat them quickly."

"Are you going to need a second freezer room?" Brody asked.

Young turned and realised Rush and Brody had sat down nearby with their own dinner, close to where Becker was peeling and slicing roots to dry in long strips in the sun.

"Well, I wouldn't say no." Inman said.

Brody nodded and looked at Rush, who finished his mouthful of meat and salad filled wrap before speaking.

"There's no suitable candidate close to the existing freezer." He tilted his head to look at them. "But it would probably be safer to have one further away anyway, in case of damage to that area. We could try the room next to the Armoury, there are two around the right size on that corridor and there is no one living on that corridor. They all look like storage compartments." He looked at Young questioningly, surprising Young a little.

"Sounds good." Young agreed readily. "How long will it take you to do it?"

"Now we know how?" Brody asked. "About half a day with three of us."

Rush nodded in agreement.

"Do it." Young said. "When you get back."

He quickly finished the rest of his food, then stood and went to assemble the empty baskets for the next trip out.

xxxoooxxx

The small encampment was quiet and still as Rush opened the doorway of the small shelter. It took him a moment for his eyes to adjust from the moonlight to the brighter light of the animal fat lamp and he blinked for a second in the entrance.

Young was still awake; working on the knotting Rush had seen him fiddling with earlier with Calvos after dinner. The far end of whatever he was working on had a loop which was hooked around his sock clad big toe, and he had completed about a foot of the reasonably complex pattern, leaning over to squint at it by the lamp light.

Rush squinted at the handicrafts not quite figuring what the long strip was. Young looked up at Rush, unhooked it from his foot, rolled it up and moved out of the way so Rush could come fully into the shelter.

"Inman taken over watch?" Young asked him. Rush nodded, scooting onto the pallet and stretching himself out.

Young sprawled next to him. Rush wondered why he had stayed awake, it was past this planet's midnight. He watched as Young rolled onto his back and stretched out muscles tightened by hunching over his handicrafts. He looked tense.

"You enjoy it?" Rush gestured at where Young had deposited the rolled up bundle of string.

Young nodded. "I don't get to make stuff often." He said. "I'm not sure I'm much good at it."

Rush shrugged. "It looked like you knew what you were doing." He offered tactfully.

Young gave him a wry smile. "It's something to keep me busy. Are you looking forward to getting back on Destiny?" He said, changing the subject seemingly deliberately.

"I've got a lot to do." Rush said, trying to keep his tone neutral. "If I'm goin' to get all of the repairs done I want."

"You realise this level of repairs is not going to be sustainable once we are on the move again?" Young told him with a serious expression. "The constant supplies we are obtaining from the planets without major risks or new exploration needed are putting us in a lot better position than we will be in the future."

"Yes," Rush said acidly, "I'm perfectly aware of that. We've done more foraging in the last two weeks than we've managed over practically the whole of our time on Destiny."

"Just so I'm sure you know." Young said.

"Oh I know Colonel, I know." Rush did not try to keep the sharpness out of his voice.

Young rolled over from where he was staring at the roof of the shelter. "Hey, relax, I'm glad you're getting the repairs done."

Rush turned his head to stare at him. "How nice to feel appreciated." He said with a hard edge of sarcasm, waiting for Young to make some sort of comment about his focus or obsession. When the comment came it was not what he expected.

"I don't just keep you around to keep the bed warm you know." Young said facetiously.

Rush stared at him for a moment, then snorted. "You'd be sadly disappointed if you did." He said. "I don't put out half as much heat as you do. Ready for bed?" He asked and watched a couple of difficult to read expressions pass over Young's face.

He could not fail to have noticed Young's discomfort over the last couple of days or his uncharacterisic silence since they had arrived on the planet this morning. He was fairly sure he knew the reason. Not that it was unduly worrying him, it had not been anything deliberate or done by choice.

He pursed his lips in thought a moment. "Look, Young…" He paused, Young had frozen, staring at him. "I can see you're uncomfortable since the last time we were," he sought the way of putting it least likely to result in Young shutting down on the conversation, "sharing a bed."

Young looked yet more uncomfortable.

"I'm not entirely oblivious," Rush continued somewhat awkwardly, "I know what happened." He could see the flush creeping up Young's neck, even in the dim light. "I didn' take it personally. It happens. It's not as if you were awake."

Young appeared mortified.

"I'd not have mentioned it if I didn' think it was bothering you, I was gonna ignore it."

"I thought you'd missed it." Young admitted.

"I kinda had an idea what it was, and when I woke up in the morning and you'd left your underpants drying..."

Young flushed.

Rush wondered if this was really a good idea, but spoke again. "Look Young, I've woken up in bed with you in an inconvenient position myself, not through anything I did. You've shared beds off world, you must've had this sort of thing before."

Young sucked in a breath. Rush wondered if he was going to get up and leave.

"I've never…had…accidentally…come while in bed with another man though."

He actually felt sympathy for Young in this regard. Young had had that happen, then found himself in a situation where he had to sleep in the same bed as Rush before he had had time to process it. Despite that, Rush was still not particularly entranced by the idea of having to manage Young's awkwardness for any longer than he had to. Better to rip the plaster off now in one go.

Rush shrugged. "All men do it in their sleep, presuming they're physically capable. Given that, it was inevitable one of us would, even though neither of us are that young anymore. Fifty fifty chance, possibly slightly weighted in your favour as I'm older maybe."

Young sighed, hauled off his pants and slid into bed. "I promise not to say anything when it happens to you." He muttered.

Rush snorted and blew out the lamp. In the sudden smoky darkness he stripped to his underwear and slid into bed, spooning up behind Young with a hand on his shoulder. With the clear skies it was a chill enough night he was going to appreciate the warmth. Young lay there stiff and uncomfortable for a while. Rush patted Young's shoulder and slid his arm round his waist.

"Relax." He said. "I think I feel pretty safe you're no' likely to molest me and I'm cold."

Young grunted irritably, but relaxed slowly, and they went to sleep.

xxxoooxxx

By the third day Young had loosened up. He had not had a reoccurrence of the event that had embarrassed him so much. The clear skies meant warm days but much cooler nights and by the second morning waking up in the shelter he was back to appreciating waking up curled against another warm body before the sun took the chill off the air.

The third afternoon was their R and R period and after spending a couple of hours after lunch packing the accumulated supplies for travel, they were all free to do what they wanted. Barnes and Calvos had decided they were going swimming in the river, which seemed like a good enough idea to most of the party.

The sun was warm enough for it to still be pleasant, but Young had to admit to surprise when they went skinny dipping. Rush just gave a bark of laughter and sat down in a sunny patch nearby. Young watched the rest of the party follow the pair into the water, although Brody was too shy to strip and kept his underpants on. Still it wasn't like they were here with any changes of clothes. He contemplated the river for a moment then went back to the campsite and found soap.

It was not great soap, made from herbivore fat, yellowish, hard and rather harsh on the skin, but it was soap. He walked back to the river a little way away from the horse play, somewhat further up the river, out of sight of the main party. He stripped off and leaving his clothes hung within reach on a convenient overhanging branch he walked into the river with his back to the bank. It was a little chilly, but he gritted his teeth, ducked right under to get his hair wet and grabbing the soap again, settled to have a really good scrub down.

He was scrubbing soap through his hair when he was startled by a splash near the bank. He squinted over his shoulder, blinking against the soap that ran into his eyes, making them burn. He caught a glimpse of skin but had to turn and rinse his streaming eyes.

"Well, are you going to share that soap then?"

He almost jumped out of his skin at the voice from directly behind him, the noise of wading covered by his own splashing of his face. He caught a glimpse of Rush out of the corner of his eye, and flinched, turning away.

"Come on then." Rush demanded.

A hand appeared in the edge of his vision and he put the soap in it quickly. He turned a little further away, trying to ignore the sound of splashing next to him as he rinsed the soap out of his hair. Rush gave a short laugh.

"I thought you soldiers had to get used to communal showers an' all that."

"Not quite the same as skinny dipping." Young said. "You startled me."

There was another snort. "Well don't worry, I don't think I'm likely to molest you either."

He finished rinsing off and turning away from Rush, waded out of the water. On the bank he scraped water of himself and sat down on a wide flat rock to dry off. Out in the river Rush was facing away from him scrubbing himself down briskly with what appeared to be a sock. He looked away quickly, but not before he noted that despite a reasonable amount of lean muscle, Rush was still much too thin. Flushing, he pressed as much water as possible out of his hair, pulled on his pants over skin still slightly damp and lay back to soak up the sun.

He kept his eyes closed when Rush came out of the water, but did open them briefly when Rush sprawled out next to him on the warm rock. Young dozed.

The chill woke him, a breeze drifting over him and bringing up goosebumps on the side of him that was cold. He opened his eyes realising that the other side was warm as it had Rush pressed up against it sound asleep. He pulled his watch very carefully out of his pocket and realised they had been asleep for just over two hours.

The sun had moved and their rock was now in the shade, which was why the chill had woken him. He shivered suddenly and Rush woke with a start, the arm across Young's chest momentarily flexing hard. Rush looked up at him.

"The sun moved." Young said. "We're in the shade. We need to move."

Rush let go of him and sat up, pushing the hair off his face and blinking the sleep out of his eyes. He pulled his mobile phone from his pants pocket and looked at it. "Two and a half hours since we left them."

"Better get back to camp I guess before they miss us." Young said, sitting up next to him.

He reached out and grabbed his tshirt pulling it on and shrugging into his jacket. They both pulled on shoes and socks and walked back to the camp.

The camp was quiet. Brody was near the fire working on some sort of craft project which looked like a mat woven of reeds, Greer was sprawled out on a blanket reading and Calvos and Barnes were heads together over another project.

"Good walk?" Brody asked.

Greer opened his eyes and gave them a significant look.

"Yeah." Rush said. "Very relaxing."

Young nodded slightly to Greer with a grateful look as Brody went back to his project. Young wondered what Greer had seen, assuming he had come after them. When they had woken, Rush had been lying up against the length of his side, an arm thrown across him. Had Greer seen that? Greer, after that one look, had turned back to his book and was reading again. Young sighed. Greer was trustworthy, closed mouthed. If he did know he would keep it to himself. Still, it may be something he would have to address later.

This was becoming more complicated than it had initially seemed. In all ways.

Greer did not mention it though. The rest of the afternoon was quiet. Rush had picked up some of his carving again, although he had not sat down close enough for Young to see what it was, and Young picked up the belt he was working on. So far it seemed to be going well, the knotting solid and even. It was calming and slightly meditative working on the repetitive pattern, and he allowed his mind to start turning over the thoughts that had been tugging at the back of his mind since they had got out of the river.

He was completely overreacting, he must be. He had showered with other guys, bathed in rivers with other guys, slept in the same tent, bed, even sleeping bag with other guys. One weird unforeseen occurence had made him massively overreact. He needed to chill out, calm down and stop panicking about this every time anything remotely triggering of the memory happened.

He told himself firmly, he was going to stop going over and over it and just get back to enjoying having some company. He was straight, Rush was straight, they both appreciated the company and both of them were old enough to know how men's bodies worked. Sometimes all of their own random accord.

xxxoooxxx

"The seedship is on it's way back." Rush said from the doorway.

Young looked up. Rush looked wary. Young leaned back in his chair, pushing the laptop away and stretched to work out the kinks in his shoulders. He had been catching up on reports and briefings since they had arrived back at lunchtime Destiny-time.

"What is the seedship mining?"

"Rare earths."

"Rare earths? Like dirt?"

Rush shot him a look of withering derision. "No, rare minerals, they're just known as rare earths. They're used to make superconductors and ceramics among other things. We need them for the seedship to make dome panels. No rare earths, no dome panels. The seedship needs them as an additive to the glass. They'll also be useful for making some components we are going to need if we want our own technology not to start breaking down. Hence this mining is important. Very important."

Young nodded thoughtfully, then looked up. "Do you know anything about geology?"

"I do now, but only in Ancient courtesy of the database." Rush snapped. "Unfortunately we're somewhat short on geologists since Doctor Palmer went AWOL within a week of us getting here. I've got Ramirez who has agreed to start researching this sort of thing when he's on Earth."

Young raised an eyebrow. "And you were going to tell me about this when?" He said, his voice dropping an octave and hardening.

"I am now." Rush's face was typically inexpressive, maybe a little irritated, but Young was getting better at reading his body language now and he was definitely uncomfortable at being challenged. "I need to get more specialists trained up and start cross training in case we lose any. The only candidates for new or missing specialisms are your soldiers."

Young chuckled but did not allow his expression to soften. "So you want to poach my soldiers."

Rush scowled. "If you can give me a better option I'm willing to listen." He replied acerbically.

Young laughed out loud. "That's debatable." He straightened his expression and continued before Rush could interrupt. "So what do you think we need?"

"Ideally?" Rush asked. Young nodded. "I need Volker to start training another astrophysicist. I need at least another couple of engineers to work with Brody on repairs so I've got people who don't need to be told what to do, I'd like to keep Atienza and find another, Barnes maybe. I need someone to consider earth sciences from scratch particularly geology if we're going to continue mining, and people to work with Inman and Park and their team on hydroponics, food and foraging on planets, so ecology, biology, that kind of thing."

Young shifted in his seat and Rush crossed his arms and leaned on the doorframe, frowning and continuing.

"I need a chemist ideally. I managed to work through the recipe for the dome glass with Dr Jones from the SGC, but I could do with access to one more regularly. That's just for starters. Someone who can start on programming would be good but they'd need to know Ancient, so I'll take Calvos for that, he can work with Chloe and Eli." He squinted slightly at Young. "For all of the Bridge crew to start gaining a working knowledge of Ancient and _everyone_ to start with basic engineering and science knowledge for help with repairs."

Young stared at him.

"You asked." Rush said, uncrossing an arm and pushing his hair out of his eyes. "We're stuck out here for the foreseeable future and whether anyone believes me or not, I currently have no way of getting anyone home. We could survive here, certainly, but if we want to start improving our situation, if you want this to be a working command long term we need to multi-skill. There are too few of us." He gave Young a sardonic half smile. "I just didn't think you'd let me anywhere near your soldiers."

"Separate shifts for their different roles," Young said flatly, "and clear lines of reporting. Brody, Volker, Inman and Eli join Camile's management training, I'm not going to try and make you do it."

Rush laughed but Young continued regardless.

"If you want me and my officers training on science and Ancient as well, being as we're all 'bridge crew', and we're training you and your civilians to be remotely useful in defence, something has to give." Young could see Rush thought he was going to turn him down, and raised a hand to forestall his interruption. "So we put some of the less hard science directed civilians like Inman and less combat oriented military like Becker under Camile's direct supervision, leave her to manage our support services. All the civilians unless physically unable will undertake military training so they can defend the ship at least."

Rush looked at him thoughtfully, evidently running through options in his head. There was a long pause.

"Agreed," Rush said. He gave a twist of his lip, a sardonic half smile, before adding, "if Camile agrees, obviously."

Young nodded, he looked down at the report he had been reading, the latest repair results from while they had been away. "We've got five days before Destiny jumps again. You and I have the last two days as our final shore leave, that's not going to leave time for work rebuilding the dome."

Rush shook his head. "No, but we can get the preparatory work around the dome finished in FTL. I expect Destiny will be making some longer stops in the reasonably near future to get herself back in position in relation to the seedships and to allow us to undertake more repairs."

Young repeated his nod and gave a look at Rush who was looking down, rubbing his jaw with the heel of his hand. Rush looked tired and Young knew he had thrown himself straight back into the repairs around the dome area when he had returned. Young looked for his watch to check the time.

"It's twenty past midnight." Rush said.

Young stood, removed his reading glasses and pinched the bridge of his nose with thumb and index finger.

"And your watch is in my quarters." Rush added. "It ended up in my bag, you forgot to put it on this morning on the planet."

"Show's how much time I've had to use it today."

Rush nodded. "You should get some sleep." He said turning to leave.

Young stood, and cleared his throat. Rush stopped and turned back.

"You want to stay?" Young asked quietly.

xxxoooxxx

Rush was already running through the crew roster in his head as he turned.

"You want to stay?" Young asked looking away almost as soon as he'd said it.

The offer stopped Rush's train of thought dead. Rush realised it was the first time Young had actually asked him to stay for no specific reason.

There was silence and Young looked up after a moment. Rush watched him. Their eyes met. Young shifted uncomfortably and a flush was creeping up his neck. Young looked nervous and maybe a little hopeful. Rush felt tired, and although he was not sure he wanted to admit it, the idea of sleeping alone was deeply unappealing.

He stepped in before he could second guess himself and hit the hatch closure. "Yeah," he said. "Come on, let's get some sleep."

Young was already making his way to the bed, shedding outer clothes. Rush followed him to the bed, stripping himself, putting his phone on the counter by the bed and sliding in next to Young. Young turned out the light and as Young turned back towards him he rolled into the other man almost gratefully. Shifting his position so he was a little further down the bed he allowed Young to wrap around him, after a moment fisting his fingers into the other man's t-shirt in between them.

"You okay?" Young asked him, a murmur into his hair.

Rush sighed. "Yeah. Just tired." He rested his forehead on Young's chest.

"'Kay." Young said. He shifted, sliding a knee between Rush's and settling their weight against each other more securely.

Rush lay there, listening as Young's breathing drifted into sleep, letting himself settle into to the warmth. He realised he was too tired to continue worrying about how much he was appreciating not sleeping alone. He knew what date it was and at his count they had slept in the same bed fifteen of the last twenty five nights. He was getting used to it and he realised he did not care.

Whether he deserved the comfort or not was a completely different matter. Rush lay there with his eyes closed, listening to Young breathe. He took a lot longer before he followed Young into sleep.

xxxoooxxx

He awoke the next morning when the alarm on his phone went off. He struggled out of Young's embrace and grabbed it to turn it off. He looked back over to Young, who was blinking at him blearily.

"I have to go." Rush said, climbing out of bed.

Young slid out opposite, giving him a look. Rush avoided his gaze.

"You sleep well?" Young asked.

Rush nodded. "Yeah." He said, pulling on his clothes.

He had, once he had finally fallen asleep he had slept like a log. He shifted uncomfortably. "I'll get on with refridgerator and the dome preparation." He said. "I've got the late bridge shift."

He could see Young wanted to ask something and thought it was probably would he see him after.

"I'll see you later." He said a little roughly, and walked out before Young could continue the conversation.

xxxoooxxx

The seedship arrived back a couple of hours later. Young went to the bridge to watch it dock then spent the rest of the morning with Inman, Park, Camile, Scott and Brody discussing the priorities for the final days of foraging from the planets. Of the five planets only Hoth 2 had been less useful, only providing salt, but Young supposed that it was just randomly in range of the other four planets.

Tatouine was of limited use, but had provided a significant supply of calcium carbonate for the air scrubbers, not that they needed it yet, but no-one was taking any chances, and as writing chalk for teaching and notices. There were also other substances that had been retrieved including salt and some alkali which would apparently be useful.

As regards food their situation was comparatively excellent. They hadn't been this well supplied since they arrived. Becker and Inman's conservative estimate was that they had five months food if they continued tight rationing. Young had allowed himself to breathe a sigh of relief when they had all left.

Brody had reported that Rush had sent him and he had left Rush with Atienza and Barnes working on the second refridgeration room. It seemed Rush had already coopted the two for engineering, but a quick check of the rota spreadsheet on the laptop had established that neither had any other shift today and Young had let it go.

The afternoon was spent in front of the laptop again, trying to build a draft of what a military training schedule would look like for the civilian population. It wasn't as if they had enough ammunition to start training them on a firing range and they had already been undertaking general fitness with the military. After a couple of hours he called in Scott and James and handed his very basic notes off to the pair.

"What do you think?" He asked them. "What would you add."

They sat hunched over the laptop reading through.

"I think you can add more hand to hand combat to that." Vanessa mused. "And more war games."

Young waited for her to think it through.

"People get bored." She said, looking up. "You'll get them to engage more if it's entertainment as well."

He nodded.

"Teach some of the science staff explosives." Scott said. "They've got the background understanding to manage it and if we get them interested they might start to make us more, we could do with more munitions. And teach Volker to fly the shuttle."

"Why Volker?" Young asked curiously.

"He's an astrophysicist." Scott said. "And I think Rush will miss him less than Brody or Eli."

"I don't know what Rush has against him." James said.

"I always guessed it's cause he doesn't fight back." Scott offered. "Rush doesn't respect people who are pushovers. But I think if we're talking flying spaceships, an astrophysicist is probably a good option from a research point of view and if we're working on the hull then he's less likely to be actually conducting repairs than Brody and they work well together on those projects."

Young nodded. Both points were good.

After the discussion concluded he went to find Rush. It took some time, the new refridgeration room had already been completed and when Young arrived Becker was supervising several crew members moving supplies in. Rush was not on the bridge or in the Core Interface Room but Barnes and Atienza were sitting in the mess hall and suggested Rush had talked about running through some figures on the Ancient database.

He found Rush in the Chair Room, but everything was dark except the console that Rush was working at. Rush looked up at him and scowled.

"I thought I'd put this room off limits." Young said irritatedly.

"I'm not using anything related to the chair." Rush snapped back. "I just wanted a quiet console, and where better to find one than a room that's off limits."

"What are you doing?" Young asked him walking over.

Rush took a moment to reply and Young guessed he was deciding how much to tell him.

"Looking at some data on power flows." Rush replied.

"Power flows where."

"The cold area." Rush replied, his tone a little aggressive, obviously expecting a fight. "I wanted to look at what the power requirements might be when we bring that area back online."

Rush opened his mouth to speak again, and Young reached out and placed his hand on Rush's upper arm to quiet him so he could speak. Rush flinched under his hand and Young stopped before he had even started. He looked quickly into his eyes, seeing something startled and…something… that shut down fast. Young squeezed Rush's arm and felt a very slight shudder. Young searched his face again hesitating and almost snatched his hand away, but a split second decision made him leave it there.

Only a couple of seconds had passed, a momentary but noticeable pause, before Rush continued more slowly.

"I had some time free." Rush said.

"Hey, what you do in your spare time..." Young said.

Rush took a deep breath, Young realised he was holding his, waiting for Rush to snap something and pull away but Rush let his breath out.

"Considering what it is, there's some extremely large power conduits passing into that area." Rush said voice still a little slow. "I've not been able to track where they come from, they pass through the heavily damaged area and through the large hull breach on the underside we haven't worked on yet."

Young's fingers had tensed somewhat on Rush's arm and he took his hand away. Something passed over Rush's face but Young was not able to read it. He had the sense that something had happened but neither he nor Rush appeared to understand it as Rush was looking uncertain also. Rush stepped back and leaned on the console continuing the conversation despite the incomprehensible subtext.

"I'd be interested to find out what they are for," Rush said, his voice a little more normal, "I was running a quick analysis of their probable maximum level and it's high."

"When did you find out about these conduits?" Young asked.

"When we were stuck in there, there was the back of one in the open console I was looking in." Rush said.

Young rolled his eyes suddenly coming to a realisation. "And you went back to take a look when?" He asked pointedly.

"I went back to the secured area to see if I could see any conduits entering the area." Rush growled. "I'm not a complete idiot."

"On your own into a dangerous area." Young snapped.

"I think I'm aware of the inherent risks, and I wasn't in an area that was liable to be open to vacuum or coolant fluid."

"On your own in a dangerous area!" Young repeated a little more sharply, the image of Rush unconcious, wrapped in a blanket and covered in frost surfacing in his memory. "I don't want you to..."

"So you're going to restrict my movements..."

"Rush!"

"I've got enough..."

"Nick!" Young reached out and touched Rush's arm again to stop him cutting in again.

Rush closed his mouth. Then opened it again.

"You keep touching me." He said suspiciously, looking at Young through the curtain of his hair.

"You keep interrupting me." Young closed his hand round Rush's arm and squeezed his bicep again gently. "Look, when we pulled you out of there it was a nightmare. I don't mean trouble I mean absolutely fucking terrifying. I thought all four of you were dead when we got there." He swallowed hard, feeling his fingers tighten again, unsure of what to say. "I sat on the kino sled with you and TJ on the way back. I thought you were going to die." He paused again. "I thought _you_ were going to die. Don't go back there on your own."

He knew his voice was too soft for it to be an order. He took a deep breath of his own, looking at Rush and trying to read his expression. His body language said 'startled' Young thought. He let the breath sigh out then squeezed Rush's arm again and left, feeling Rush's eyes on his back as he walked out.


	22. Needing sleep

He barely saw Rush for the next couple of days. He spent most of the next day on the bridge, followed by working with Brody's party, welding as he was directed in a corridor near the dome. According to Brody, Rush had worked on the dome area for most of the day but had returned to a console sometime before Young had arrived, ostensibly to check the progress of the manufactory and run some sensor sweeps of the area. Young suspected Rush was avoiding him but he was not going to push the issue.

The following day Young was shuttle pilot, ferrying load after load up from Down Below, mainly bales of a fibrous plant that he was assured would provide fabric and crates of roots and a weird brown nut that stank and stained the fingers orange. By the time he fell into his bed the whole day of concentration on piloting meant he did not have any energy to do anything except sleep, immediately.

He woke early the next morning, hurrying out of bed to try and shower off the worst of the orange stains and to pack his bag for the last overnight shore leave.  This one would not have any rest period at the end. The area within reach of the gate was pretty much foraged out, but this would be a last desperate push to get all of the items that had been listed as non-essential but to retrieve if possible and had been located on Big River. They would be bringing back wood for carving, crates of dirt to start up the hydroponics as soon as it was available, grass and reeds for baskets, fibre from the herbivores, sand and a series of other requested supplies from the crafts project list which was going with them.

When he got to the gateroom, Inman, Camile and Brody were hunched over the numbered list, written in one of the last sharpie markers on a piece of waste decking. On a separate piece, Calvos was drawing a rough map and adding the locations of requested supplies.

Young pushed a kino sled covered in crates out of the way and walked over.

"Are we ready?" He asked.

"Two minutes." Said Calvos, adding to the map then handing the precious sharpie marker back to Eli.

Rush walked up, pack in hand and stared at the list and map. There were big dark circles under his eyes, and he looked worn out. Young raised an eyebrow at him, receiving only a slight scowl in response.

"Are we ready?" Rush asked.

Calvos grinned at him. "Yeah, we're ready." He put the map on the kino sled and they watched as the gate hissed out.

"Come on then." Said Young, and walked through the wormhole.

xxxoooxxx

For the first day it seemed that the gate was open more than it was closed. The crates of dirt went through first, filled, sealed and slid through to be stacked awaiting the refitting of the garden. As soon as they were done the retrieval of other items on this list started.

By the time it got to the evening, Young ached all over. His back and shoulders were protesting strongly at the amount of lifting he had done and his bad knee had a decidedly uncomfortable twinge to it that suggested that Susannah would be deeply unhappy with him and that it might be an idea to use the stick for a couple of days when he got back.

The group on the planet was the same as their previous trips with a few extras. Young had wondered who would bunk with who, it was going to be pretty crowded with three in a shelter, but by the time it came to dinner everyone was so exhausted he was too tired to think about it. People started to drift off to bed as soon as the food was consumed, and it wasn't until he was looking at Rush who was nodding over his bowl of food, he realised that no one had any intention of bunking with them. Lucky really.

He pushed himself to his feet and walked over to Rush.

"Hey there." Awkwardly on sore muscles he sat himself on the log next to Rush. "You need to eat that up and get into bed." He said quietly.

Rush gave him what might have been a glare if it's effect had not been completely overwhelmed by the sheer exhaustion that was apparent on his face. Young nudged him with his elbow.

"Hey, have you had any sleep the last couple of nights?" Young asked him.

"Some." Rush replied.

Young could see that was hedging, he suspected that some meant Rush had grabbed an hour or two, or had maybe fallen asleep over a console. He had no idea what the man had been doing but it definitely wasn't sleeping. He nudged Rush.

"Come on, eat up, then we can sleep."

Rush found some focus from somewhere and scooped the last few mouthfuls of food into his mouth. Young dragged himself to his feet, took the bowl out of Rush's hand, dumped it near the fire and look a look around.

With the exception of Brody who was on watch staring out over the dark grassland, they were the last ones not in bed. Young turned back to Rush, grabbed his hand and hauled him to his feet. Rush came to his feet a little unsteadily, lurching into Young who grabbed at him to stop them both going over. They swayed there a moment, clasped chest to chest, arms round each other.

"I don't think we wanna get caught like this." Young murmured. "Let's get to bed Rush."

The hay on the pallet in the shelter was a little hard packed and they had not had the time to add any more when they had arrived. Young did not think Rush would notice it though and he certainly would not. They struggled out of clothes and into the bed. They had not thought to light the lamp, but Young could feel that Rush was tense, laying on his back next to him. He reached over him, grabbed the arm on the other side and rolled Rush against him, sliding an arm under his neck and bodily shifting him so he was settled against Young's chest.

Rush had tensed, but Young wrapped the arm behind Rush firmly around his back and used the other hand to grab Rush's arm, pulling it to wrap around his waist.

"Sleep." He said firmly.

He felt the moment that Rush gave up, all the tension going out of him as he practically collapsed into Young's side. Young chuckled quietly, but it appeared that Rush was asleep almost within moments. Young followed him quickly after.

Sunlight filtering through the shelter woke him where he lay on his back, staring into the roof of the shelter. The camp was still quiet and Rush still asleep curled against his side, an arm round his waist. Young took a moment to just lay there, warm and relaxed. This was the last time they would do this, they would not be staying on the planet tonight. Destiny's departure was scheduled for first thing the next morning Destiny time, which was late this evening planet time. Everything had to be off the planet at least two hours before then.

He knew he was going to miss this, sleeping surrounded by the scent of plants and earth, waking to sunshine and fresh air and a warm body completely relaxed into him. They were never this relaxed together on the ship and he had come to the conclusion that he enjoyed having someone to curl round, someone who wanted to be there, relaxed with Young's arms wrapped round them.  Even if it was Rush, the idea of whom relaxed and cuddled up was almost laughable. He shifted slightly to look down at the man sleeping against his chest. Rush was still sound asleep, hair half across his face, mouth open a crack, drooling slightly into his beard. Young stifled a chuckle, he doubted he looked any better in his sleep, and Rush shifted, closing his mouth and sleepily rubbing his damp cheek against Young's chest without waking. Young wrapped his arms round Rush letting himself doze.

Young woke for a second time to the realisation there was noise outside, the sound of people moving around. He listened for a second, whoever it was there was only two or three of them and they seemed to be trying to be quiet, not wake the rest of the camp before they had to get up. Young was grateful for the last moments of peace in the camp, in this bed. Next to him, Rush was blinking sleep out of his eyes and then seemed to come alive in what seemed to be his only speed, constant motion, rolling backwards away from Young and sitting up.

Well, Young thought, that was that, over.

They dragged on their outer clothes and went outside to where Greer and Inman were quietly making breakfast from the previous night's left overs. The sun was breaking through hazy clouds, burning off the last of the mist that had settled around the river. The air smelled moist and green and Young took a deep breath trying to hold the moment in his mind, before he turned back to the campfire. He opened his eyes to see Rush watching him, a curious curve to his lips that he could mistake for a smile if he tried hard enough. Then Rush turned away to accept a cup of hot sweet tea from Greer.

He settled himself next to Rush on a log, staring into the dancing flames of the small fire. The air was still chill with the misty air, the sun not strong enough to warm it yet, though his black jacket was beginning to warm where the sun hit it, and he could feel the slight warmth radiating from Rush's arm against his, where they were squeezed onto the chunk of log.

Breakfast was a hasty affair after which everyone stripped the shelters, pulling out their packs and bundling everything in. Young helped Barnes put packs by the gate as the rest of the party took the shelters down. The bedding was bundled together and the pallets pulled to pieces to ensure no items were lost in them and left behind, retrieving three forks and an earring.

The camp was soon reduced to a heap of discarded hay and branches, a stack of poles of wood and several logs round a fire pit. Becker poured a bucket of water over the fire, releasing a hissing cloud of charcoal scented smoke.

The main work of the day started quickly. Trips out to retrieve ojects and items, stacking and crating then going out again and again. To Young it felt frantic, grabbing everything that might be of use and passing it through the gate. Even the poles, logs and hay that had made parts of the campsite were bundled and passed through the gate. As the sun started to drift towards the horizon he was physically exhausted, muscles aching and hands sore, grazed and battered by the hurried pace of the work.

His radio crackled, Brody with a message that they had forty minutes to get back to the campsite before the gate opened for the last shipping out of materials. It was followed by the sound of someone hitting a metal crate with one of Becker's cooking spoons, which echoed hollowly out across the shallow river valley, the signal to return for those with no radio.

Young looked out over the grassy landscape, missing the place already. Looking down, he snatched handfuls of the chamomile scented not quite grass and stuffed his pockets full.. Even dried into hay he knew it kept it's scent, and just for a while he thought he would like a reminder of this place. Then, sighing, he hitched the rope around the log that Becker and he had just cut and handing off the other end to Becker they began to haul it back to the camp.

By the time he got back to the camp, Rush was standing in front of the open gate.

"We have two hours fifty five minutes till Destiny jumps." Rush informed him.

" Then that gives us 55 minutes to shift these." Young said looking at the final heaps of supplies.

There was not much left. They fed the last of the items through the gate then shut it down immediately so the working parties on the other planets could do likewise. A last check of the campsite took only five minutes.

"Half an hour till the gate opens." Rush said.

"I could go for a bath." Greer suggested.

Young looked at the faces around him, read their expressions and realised he was not the only one who was going to miss the planet. They had felt safe here, felt this was a place that could possibly meet their needs. He had almost expected more suggestions that they should leave Destiny and stay, but it seemed that since the return and second horrific deaths of those who had stayed on the tragically misnamed Eden planet that the idea of chancing leaving Destiny was less attractive. The only conversations he had overheard had not seemed more than vague day dreaming. Not that anyone had said anything in front of him.

He gave the campsite another look. They had nothing left with them but the packs stacked by the gate, weapons and the clothes they stood up in. Even despite how accumstomed they had all become to the general smell of unwashed clothes and people, he could smell himself, sweaty and dirty. The river was close and it would be better than watching each other wait thirty depressing minutes till the gate opened again.

"Okay." he said. "Twenty minutes."

Someone grabbed the soap and they moved, quickly. This time there was no time or energy to waste on embarrassment. The entire party shucked clothes into careful heaps by the river and scrubbed down, the two cakes of soap passed hand to hand with minimal splashing. Clothes were soaped, rinsed and wrung out. Everyone looked exhausted, but he could see the morale benefits of feeling clean improving people's moods.

By the time the gate opened, the entire group were waiting, damp clothes dragged on over still wet skin and the planet had it's last evacuation. He saw Rush pause by the wormhole and stare out at the landscape for a long moment, the warm light of the sunset lending a ruddy cast to the wet hair still plastered back over his head and making his dark eyes almost black. Their eyes locked for a second and Young was surprised to see a slightly rueful expression on Rush's face before Rush broke their gaze, turned and disappeared through the gate. Young gave the planet a last glance, fixing the panorama and the sunset in his mind, before following Rush through the wormhole.

xxxoooxxx

They sat on the bridge waiting. Young in the chair and Rush at the central console, running rapidly through what appeared to be more diagnostics. Eli and Calvos worked silently at the other two consoles and up on the balcony, Brody, Volker, Scott and James were watching.

The diagnostics that Rush and Eli had already run, suggested that the seedship was securely docked to Destiny and the piggyback jump would no cause a problem. The ships had both refueled and Eli had suggested that the parallel jump might even increase their range without refuelling, although both ships needed to separate to refuel.

The atmosphere was still tense though. The crew on the bridge all glued to the count down, red figures, the Ancient numbers now as familiar to Young as the ones from home. The seconds counted off.

Three, two, one…

The hum and shudder, the world shifted sideways and they dropped into FTL as smoothly as they had ever done.

He waited for Rush and Eli to finish the diagnostics.

"Are we good?" He asked as Rush's posture changed, sitting back a little from the console.

"Yes." Rush said, turning in his seat.

He looked even more tired than usual.

"Good." Young said. He turned to James who was watching the proceedings from the balcony. "Okay Lieutenant, you have the bridge with Eli and Volker." He turned back to Rush and Calvos. "Okay, we've been up for twenty two hours. I want to see all of the science team at eighteen hundred hours for a briefing on the next round of repairs. That gives you eight hours, everyone get some rest. I don't want to see you for a minimum of four hours."

Rush scowled, but Calvos just stood.

Young stood and moved to let James sit in the chair, turning to the balcony. "That includes you too Brody."

Young turned back and locked eyes with Rush who was turned in his seat to look at Young. He looked exhausted but annoyed. Young held his gaze, staring him down and after a moment Rush ceded his seat to Volker and walked out.

Young caught up with Rush in the corridor.

"You don't need to check up on me Colonel." He said coldly.

Young chuckled. "Oh I think I do." He said quietly. "If I don't you'll take yourself off somewhere else and start doing something. Your quarters or mine?"

"What do you want?" Rush snapped.

"I would have thought it was pretty obvious." Young said mildly. "To make sure you get a four hour nap."

Rush stopped and turned on him. "I don't need a keeper." He snapped.

"Yes, you do." Young contradicted. "Look Rush, I'm willing to make a scene out of this, or you can give in and we can get four hours sleep. Then you can go back to working yourself into the ground. On the grounds that I know your next target for repairs is the power conduits around the dome, I think I'm pretty justified in ensuring you don't do it when you're so tired you'll fry yourself or someone else."

Rush glared at him.

"Come on." Young cajoled, feeling faintly ridiculous. "Just four hours. For the sake of safety if nothing else."

Rush said nothing, just spun angrily on one foot.

"Rush!" Young called after him, following.

He realised Rush was making for his quarters though, out on the periphery of the inhabited area, not towards dome, core room or anywhere else. Rush slammed a hand into the door release and strode in, throwing himself down on the bed and rolling to face away from Young on the far side.

Young shut the door after him and slid onto the bed, shifting to spoon up behind Rush and pulling the edge of the covers over both of them. Rush was tense and angry, but the bed warmed up quickly and Young could feel him relaxing.

Young wrapped  his arm round Rush's waist, tangling the fingers of the hand closest to the bed in the hair at the nape of Rush's neck. He was tired himself.

He could feel Rush fiddling with something and after a moment Rush leaned forward. Young tensed his arm reflexively, not letting Rush get up, but he heard the click of Rush's mobile phone being put down on the floor and relaxed as Rush leaned back into him.

"Four hours." Rush growled.

"Four hours." Young agreed.

Rush's body softened against him, as Rush pulled the cover down in front of him. Young snugged himself up behind Rush and relaxed.

xxxoooxxx

Young stood tensely as he looked at the kino display that Rush had brought up on a holographic screen, where despite the full atmosphere, Brody and Eli were wearing the Ancient space suits to connect the power conduit. It was the nearest they had to protective gear.

Rush was sat at the console, eyes intent on what was going on in the corridor near the dome. Young stood behind his right shoulder. He should be sitting in the command chair, but embarrassingly he had fidgeted and been unable to sit still for an anxiety that he couldn't entirely suppress. Eventually, before it became obvious, he had wandered over to stare at the screen over Rush's shoulder.

This was risky, very risky, hence the suits. The conduit that the pair was first reconnecting and then would be restarting, was carrying a huge amount of power. The suits would not be a complete protection for them but were better than nothing.

Young was guessing that part of Rush's tension was anger. He had expected to have an argument with Rush about whether he would be allowed to participate in the repairs, but it had not been necessary.

TJ had walked into the planning meeting and sat down, waiting till the end. She had asked for a word with Young and Rush, waited for the others to leave and exercised her medical authority, placing a complete veto on Rush participating till he had had his final check up from Susannah. Rush had stared at her with approaching fury then stormed out of the room.

"You can tell him if he tries to participate I will sedate him." TJ told Young. "I'm not one hundred percent convinced he has full mobility back in his hands yet, and it's too risky.   I asked Eli what was involved," she added at Young's querying look, "I know how delicate and dangerous this is. I don't want anyone blown up"

Her face was firm, one hand on the edge of a console, long fingers gripping it.

Young stared at them a moment then nodded, looking up at her. "You've saved me an argument." He replied finally. "I was going to say no myself."

"Better that I do." She said. "I have a reason to say no." Her look dared him to contradict  her assertion.

He had chosen not to. "My concern was about the lack of sleep. Even for him it's...low. He looks like crap." He shrugged. "I don't know what the problem is, but he's sleeping even less than usual and he's been avoiding me." Young admitted shaking his head slightly. It had been three days since they had left the planet, three days since Young had made Rush take a nap, which had stretched from four hours to just over six because Young had turned the alarm off on Rush's phone.

TJ gave him a concerned look. "Because he thinks you'll want to know what's wrong."

"No," Young said, "he knows I won't push for that. He thinks I'll make him go to bed." He frowned. "I got no idea why he doesn't want to."

He sighed, shrugging. TJ gave him a sympathetic look patting his arm.

"He pisses me off." Young said. "He really pisses me off."

TJ had laughed, ignoring Young's scowl and patted him on the arm again as she turned to walk out of the core room.

Young came back to the present, distracted from his thoughts by a swift movement from Rush. He was pulling up a schematic over the edge of the kino display. Young was getting more used to them now and could see it was a power schematic, showing power flow through the connections. Young could see the faint reflection of Rush's face in the console, the panel of black glass where it was unlit by data windows. The black glass, imperfect mirror that it was highlighted the dark shadows under Rush's eyes.

Young forced his attention back to Eli and Brody, a situation where change was likely to happen, and hopefully for the positive.

xxxoooxxx

TJ watched as Rush sat down. He still looked worn, drained in the same way he had been for days. Young was directly behind him and sat down opposite in his usual spot. Rush was staring at his food, with a little distaste, and she watched as Young reached out and put his hand on Rush's shoulder. Surprisingly, Rush seemed to accept the casual touch.

She could not hear what Young said, he spoke too quietly, but Rush looked up at him through his hair and murmured something in return, then started to eat. Young picked up his spoon and they both ate in silence.

Rush finished first and stood, leaving his empty bowl on the table and walking out swiftly, evidently leaving before anyone, or maybe just Young, could stop him. TJ caught Young's eye momentarily. He gave her a helpless look and her heart twisted a little. She shot him a small sympathetic smile before he turned back to his meal.

She turned back to her own meal with a frown, suddenly feeling lonely, and unaccountably jealous of Young and Rush. She tensed her fingers round her spoon, checking Young was not looking at her, but he was eating his food. This was something she could not allow herself, she knew, but it did not mean she was rational about it. She did not want to rekindle her relationship with Everett, but it seemed that being alone was equally difficult.

She sighed, Susannah would be back soon to conduct some check ups. Someone TJ could talk to. It could not come soon enough. She began to eat again, if only for something else to focus on.

xxxoooxxx

"Have you seen Doctor Rush?" Brody's voice cut through Young's introspection.

Young put the mug of now cold tea down on the table and looked up. "Nope, is he missing?"

Brody shrugged. "He's not scheduled for anything today, it's his day off, but I was expecting him to be in the core room working on the database like always but he hasn't been there all day and he's not answering his radio."

"He's probably off playing with some systems somewhere." Young stood. "Keep me posted."

Strange. Rush had seemed pretty much normal yesterday. Well, at least the generally sleep deprived and battered looking self that had been pretty standard for the last week. He certainly hadn't argued when Young had requested some information on the dome. Not that the information had been forthcoming yet. There was a good chance he had simply hit the point of collapse though. Even Rush could not go on like that forever, whatever the reason.

Young walked out and made his way to Rush's quarters, tapping on the door before letting himself in. The quarters were deserted, and the bed was made. Rush's radio was sat on the counter and more bizarrely his notebook and pencil stub was next to it. Young's brow furrowed and he left the room.

He took a quick turn around the common areas but Rush was nowhere to be seen. On a whim he tried his own quarters. Young had made his bed that morning from long habit, but now there was a significant dent in the bedding as if someone had curled up on top of it. Well that explained some of where Rush had been hiding. He had borrowed Young's own trick. Young suspected Rush had left before Young's bridge shift had ended. He left his quarters and wandered further out into the unused areas checking rooms.

He finally found Rush in a small room with a large window which opened out onto space,  showing the flickering light of FTL. The room was bare and Rush was sat on the floor back to the wall staring out of the window. Young walked over and sat down next to him. Rush had evidently been crying and his expression was of someone heartbroken. Young didn't say anything, but shuffled so his shoulder was up against Rush's.

There was silence for a while, only broken, by the slight rasp of Rush's breathing. Young reached out and took Rush's hand, enfolding it in his own. Young squeezed it and heard Rush's breath hitch in his chest.

"What's up?" Young asked him gently. "You wanna talk? You don't have to...but..."

There was a long pause before Rush spoke. "It's July the 16th." Rush said, so softly Young almost didn't hear it. "She died five years ago today." His free hand came up to his face, the back of his hand pressing on his mouth.

Young stared at Rush. He had absolutely no idea what to do. He knew what he would do if this was a woman needing to be comforted, taken care of, or if this was just another colleague, a fellow soldier to support but...

He pulled his thoughts up short, was that even true? He would not patronise TJ in that way, he had offered her comfort, shared it, cried on each other's shoulders with no thought to how feminine she was. Conversely he had hugged a vulnerable and crying Eli who had fallen apart and sobbed into his chest mourning Ginn. Then there was the remaining members of his gate team, the unofficial wake for Sawyer where they had locked themselves in the privacy of his quarters, split a bottle of bourbon and cried their eyes out like children in shared secrecy away from the eyes of the base.

What matter than Rush was his....what?

Friend? It seemed they had gone beyond that. To be honest, it seemed like somewhere they had bypassed friend and gone from a tense ceasefire to some sort of mutual dependence, this weird situation without ever being just friends.

Companion? It was old fashioned and seemed affected but was probably the closest he was going to get in his own head to whatever this was.

"I couldn't face it." Rush whispered. "I didn' want to be alone again."

Young sat there for a moment, and then slightly uncomfortably freed one of his hands, put an arm round Rush's shoulder and hugged him close into his side.

"I was so fucking scared."

He slid his hand up from Rush's shoulder and ran it over Rush's hair pushing it back from his face

Rush's free hand was still pressed to his face, but the other slipped from Young's hand as Rush turned to him, staring into his eyes. "An' I ran away to ignore it an' we were both alone when she died." Rush's hand moved to grasp Young's shoulder where it met his neck. "What sort of coward…what sort of fucking _monster_ am I to leave her to die alone?"

Rush dropped his head to rest on Young's shoulder and Young could feel the quiet sobs hitching Rush's body, propped up by his head on Young's arm.

 _Stop being such a damn coward Everett._ "Easy, I got you, I got you." He reached round Rush, grabbed him and hauled him into his arms, practically into his lap and wrapped his arms round him. Rush collapsed into him, sobs shaking him.

Rush gradually quieted but didn't move. He seemed drained. Young wasn't surprised, as far as he knew Rush had had practically no sleep for a week and not enough for a good few days before that. He was surprised Rush had not collapsed from physical exhaustion before this. Young rubbed his thumb against the side of Rush's neck where his hand was wrapped around the nape, fingers woven through the hair. "Nick." He said quietly. "Nick. Let's go to bed, you need to sleep. Come on, it's cold and uncomfortable here. Let's go, no-one will find you in my quarters."

He wasn't sure though whether they could get through the corridors unseen. Thoughts rattled through his head before he finally moved. He rolled Rush off his lap to sit back on the floor and moved to squat next to him, putting his arms under Rush's.

"Come on." He stood, using his leg muscles to haul them both to standing, ignoring the way his knee protested. "I got an idea."

There was another corridor of rooms and quarters, away from the utilised ones and not far from here. Young guided them both along. Rush was uncomplaining, Young practically holding him up. He found the nearest room, hit the door release and let them in. It was more like Eli's quarters than anything else, narrow bench bed, equipment, but now they were here he was not going to move them on anywhere else. He guided them both over to the bed, pulled back the covers and pushed Rush towards the bed. Rush stared at it, despite the gentle pressure Young was exerting on his shoulders towards the bed. Young gave up, spun Rush and pushed him back so the backs of his knees hit the bed. His legs folded and he sat down on the edge of the mattress.

He sat on the floor and pulled off Rush's shoes. Rush just stared at him. Young looked back, unsure what was going on in Rush's head, waiting for the explosion, but it did not come. He guessed maybe Rush had just got to a point where he was just too tired and it was just too much to have to deal with anything. Too painful to even argue. He could certainly understand that, but he tended to just drink when he got like that, which was probably even less helpful.

"Come on," Young said, "get in, we're safe here, no one will find us but I've got a radio."

He undid the laces of his boots and toed them off, then stood and pushed Rush back on the bed, before sitting on the edge of the bed and shoving Rush back towards the wall. There was no way to lay down in the bed that did not involve him being either wrapped around Rush or practically on top of him, but he did not think that was going to be a problem. Suddenly Rush sighed and rolled over towards the wall. Young reached out to dim the lights, and put the radio down on the floor where he could reach it, He slid under the covers, pulling them over both of them and wrapping himself round Rush. He certainly owed Rush plenty for taking care of him when he fell apart, this he could do willingly.

He could feel Rush crying silently again, but maybe that was not such a bad thing, and he lay there in the dark until Rush had cried himself to sleep. Mercifully it did not take long.

xxxoooxxx

He woke first, Rush a heavy weight against his chest. The other man was still asleep, and even when Young shifted to a slightly more comfortable position, he did not stir. Young lay there for a while, listening to Rush breathing. He pulled his arm out and looked at his watch, quarter past eight in the morning. It was his day off, and Rush had a late bridge shift. Young contemplated his options, before shifting Rush slightly and sliding out of bed. Rush was still dead to the world.

Young slipped quietly out of the room and trotted to the infirmary. He was not surprised that TJ was already awake and working at her desk this early in the morning, despite the lack of patients.

"TJ."

She looked up as he walked in.

"Colonel."

"I need you to take Rush off duty today."

She tilted her head and regarded him quizzically.

"It's the anniversary of his wife's death." Young said. "He's pretty beat up."

"And if you cover for him, it'll look weird as you couldn't ever be sympathetic to that." She said, a little amused.

"Yeah." He admitted.

She gave him a smile. "Okay." She agreed. "No problem. He has a migraine and I've taken his radio off him and ordered him on pain of death to rest in his quarters with a cup of painkiller tea. Not to be disturbed under any circumstances."

Young gave her a grateful and rather embarrassed look.

Camile was sipping a mug of tea when he walked into the mess and sat down across from her.

"Everett."

"Camile." He said. "TJ has just collared me to let me know she's taken Rush off duty."

Camile raised an eyebrow, looking slightly disbelieving.

"Yeah," Young laughed, trying to stop it sounding contrived, "apparently there was confiscation of a radio and threats of death or sedation if he didn't drink his painkiller and go to bed."

Camile laughed.

"You're off tomorrow as well yeah?"

"Yes." She nodded. "I don't have a shift till the day after tomorrow."

"Can I get you to take his shift today and he'll take yours Thursday?" He shifted on the bench. "I'm on tomorrow." He admitted. "I'd prefer to keep today off after the work we've been doing."

"It's fine Everett." She reassured him. "I'll still have my two days of no bridge shift."

"Thanks." He said gratefully. "I'd better grab some food."

He went up to the counter, noticing thankfully it was soft tortillas and fillings left over from the previous night's dinner. He grabbed a couple of the wraps, rolled them up round filling and threw them on a plate. He grabbed a canteen, filled it with tea and walked out with them.

When he made it back to the room in which he had left Rush, he was almost certain it would be empty, that Rush would have woken and done one of his disappearing acts. Young slipped quietly back into the small room, locking the door. Rush was still asleep, a slight frown on his face, and spread-eagled across the narrow bed as if he was reaching out for something. Young put his radio, the plate of breakfast and the canteen of tea on the table and sat on the edge of the bed.

As soon as his hip brushed Rush's hand the man was grasping at him, still almost completely asleep and evidently not entirely conscious of what he was doing. Young toed off his shoes and slid back into the bed.  Rush mumbled something in his sleep and rolled towards Young. In the tight confines of the bed, this left him almost on top of Young, Rush's hair ticklish against Young's jaw, and his beard scratchy on Young's throat.

Young wrapped an arm over him carefully, moving his head so Rush's cheek settled against his shoulder and his hair did not tickle so much, trying not to wake him. He closed his eyes and settled into the pillow. Rush needed sleep, Young was comfortable enough and Rush would sleep longer and with less nightmares with Young here. He always did.


	23. Topics both painful and innocuous

Young lay in the bed, Rush was curled tightly into his side, head on his shoulder, face tucked into his chest. He lay there running through a possible pattern for a mesh backpack for foraging using the knotting Calvos had taught him which he had been using to occupy his mind. His thoughts had drifted from topic to topic as he lay there finally lighting on the safe and stressless topic of crafts. Not that the article he had been thinking about was really practical.

He sighed and carded his fingers through Rush's hair, trying not to catch on any knots, but it was soft and smooth. He had to pause momentarily when Rush shifted uneasily against him, muttering in his sleep and fisting his fingers in Young's shirt. Young squinted down at the top of the other man's head as the other man twitched before settling against him again. He allowed his thoughts to drift again.

Rush woke about an hour later with a start and a jerk. Young tensed his arms around him, startled from his thoughts. Rush was thrashing, not entirely awake. He rolled slightly towards Rush, loosening his grip just a little to allow Rush to turn in his arms.

"Hey, Nick."

Rush was still struggling against him and Young let go and sat up, rolling Rush onto his back against the wall.

"Hey, calm down." He said gently, turning towards Rush and putting a hand on his nearest arm.

Rush focused on his face, reaching up to scrub his hair off his face and glared at Young. "Where are we? What time is it?" He demanded, voice rough and cracking from the abuse his crying had given it the night previous.

"In a room, quarters I guess, kinda like Eli's."

"Where?" Rush demanded irritably.

"On the unused corridors past the chair room." He furrowed his brow. "Don't you remember last night?"

There was a long pause before Rush spoke. "It's not all clear." He admitted. "I remember, being...unhappy...you...being there...and you dragging me through corridors."

It was accurate as far as it went.

"You know what was wrong?" Young asked him cautiously.

Rush's face went completely blank. "Yeah." His voice was hoarse. He wiped his mouth as if wiping unspoken words away, fingers curling down over lips and chin.

Young squeezed his arm. He waited for a while, watching as Rush's eyes drifted to stare off into a non-existent distance. After a couple of minutes he squeezed Rush's arm again.

"I'm guessing you've been having nightmares about it." He ventured.

"I don't think that's exactly a difficult deduction to make." Rush snapped back, swinging his gaze to glare at Young.

Young held Rush's gaze trying to remain calm. Rush's expression suddenly folded.

"I'm...that was out of order." Rush said.

"Yeah." Young said, his irritation fading.

There was a long pause before either of them spoke.

"It's been...difficult." Rush's words seemed almost pulled from him unwilling, though his expression was more open than Young would have expected.

Young nodded, realising anything he could say would not come close to reflecting the depth of Rush's pain, would be a meaningless platitude. Losing Riley and Carmen had taught him that. He waited for Rush to continue, not wanting to press.

Rush was silent, motionless, but his muscles were tense, his breathing a little shallow. "Hard to admit." He added quietly. "I know the general opinion is I'm a heartless bastard but..."

Young reached out and put his index finger across Rush's lips, stopping him before he could say any more. Rush flinched and pulled away. Young caught his jaw gently and turned his face back, Rush did not resist, but did not meet his eyes.

"No-one has the right to punish you for that," Young said dropping his hand back to the bed, "you're doing a good enough job on your own anyway. We've all done things we regret..."

For a second Young's mind threw him an image of Rush trapped in blue glass and water, beating against the glass, making him pause. Rush moved before he had to continue, collapsing back on the pillow and closing his eyes.

"Tired still?" Young asked him.

"I have a bridge shift." Rush said.

"No," Young told him firmly, "you don't. TJ took you off shift with a migraine."

Rush turned his head on the pillow. "When?"

"When I went and got breakfast." Young gestured at the food on the plate. "You are banished to your quarters with painkiller tea to rest on pain of sedation. Or possibly death."

Rush let his head fall back again. "I didn't even notice you were gone." He admitted.

Young shrugged. "You were pretty tired, had a lotta sleep to catch up with."

"Yeah. Who's taken my shift?"

"Camile. You've got her's day after tomorrow." He looked down at Rush. "You ought to eat, I doubt you ate anything yesterday."

Rush appeared to ignore this statement. Young reached out and grabbed the plate and the canteen, putting the canteen down between them and balancing the plate carefully on his thigh, stabilising it as it wobbled slightly. He tapped Rush on the shoulder.

"Breakfast."

Rush regarded it suspiciously, lifting his head to squint at it sideways. "What is it?"

"What does it look like?" Young asked. "Meat and salad wraps and a canteen of cold sweet tea. That stuff that tastes kinda lemony."

Young handed Rush the canteen and watched as he quickly downed about half of it in several long draughts.

"Thirsty then?" He noted in amusement. Rush did not dignify the statement with a response.

Young picked up a wrap and bit into it. The shreds of meat, though there were not many of them, had been cooked with something that tasted like a heavy spice, unfamiliar and slightly bitter but tasty. Something from one of the planets evidently. It really was quite good, he had enjoyed it hot the previous night and it was equally as good as cold leftovers. There were roasted vegetables of some kind in there as well. Young recognised one of them as the ubiquitous roots from Big River, but the others were obviously from elsewhere.

Young paused frm his food to look down at Rush. "Are you going to eat?"

"You can have it." Rush said noncommitally turning away again.

Young gave him a long look, waiting. With a put upon sigh Rush turned back towards him, pushed himself up onto an elbow and reached for the second wrap. Young finished his own and watched as Rush worked his way laboriously through half of his, grimacing as he chewed.

"It doesn't taste that bad." Young said.

Rush scowled as he finished a mouthful. "You don't have to watch me eat it." He snapped back. "I'm not going to feed the rest to the dog, when you're no looking."

Young chuckled. "Nothing else to do." He said with a grin. "No dog anyway."

Rush huffed and went back to his food. Young uncapped the canteen of cold tea and took a gulp. It still tasted reasonable cold. Some of the teas were not so palatable cold, others better. This was one of the better ones, almost like lemon tea. He sipped at it as Rush finished his wrap and brushed his fingers clear of crumbs over the plate. Rush pulled the canteen from his hand, quickly taking several long gulps.

"You want me to get more?" He asked grinning. "Still looking thirsty there."

Rush gave him a withering look and handed him back the canteen. Young had a little more himself then replaced the canteen and the empty plate on the table.

He turned back to Rush. Despite over twelve hours sleep, Rush still looked like death warmed up, face drawn with dark circles under his eyes.

"I'm thinking more sleep would be good." Young suggested.

Rush shrugged. "Maybe."

Young let himself down to rest propped on one arm, looking at Rush. "Or to be honest anything that you do to relax."

Rush snorted turning away, laying back on the pillow and staring at the ceiling. "Work?"

"There must be something you do for fun?" Young said.

"Work." Rush repeated.

"Something not work."

Rush shrugged and rolled to look back at Young. "Given where we are, there's not much of that here."

"So what did you do? Before we were here? Before Icarus." He corrected.

It looked for a moment if Rush was debating whether to answer or not, then he spoke.

"Listened to music, played it, read journals and books, went out for walks, swam, went to dinner. Not so much once I was working for the SGC."

"You play music?" Young said in surprise.

Rush's face froze momentarily and Young kicked himself, recalling the other man's wife had been a musician. Then Rush sighed.

"I am an adequate pianist." He said with a slightly wistful smile. "Gloria taught me. And I can sing, if I have to."

"Only adequate?" Young said, gently mocking him. "I thought you were a genius at everything."

"Apparently not." Rush said wryly.

"I can play guitar a bit." Young admitted. "Taught myself when I was a teenager."

Rush grinned a little maliciously at him. "Did you have long hair as well."

Young was studiously silent and Rush laughed at him.

"Not very," Young said embarrassed, "shoulder length. When I was at high school. It's pretty curly when it gets longer and gets a bit...big."

"The Robert Plant look?"

"Kinda." Young admitted.

"I can imagine." Rush said, giving him a sidelong look.

Young punched him gently in the shoulder, but Rush just laughed at him. Young let himself collapse down onto the pillow, on his side facing Rush. Rush turned his head to look at him.

"So," said Rush, "I told you all my dirty secrets about being a child, what about you."

Young shrugged as best as he could laying on his side. "I wanted to fly." He said. "The only way I was going to be able to do that was the air force."

Rush did not say anything but his expression and the small nod encouraged Young to continue.

"From when I was about twelve." Young said. "Only thing I wanted to do was fly. So everything I did in school was to get the right grades and experience to get into the air force as a pilot." He paused reflectively. "I had a real scare when I was sixteen. Started getting headaches, thought I was going to need glasses. Thought it would put me right out, but turned out it was tense muscles in my neck from carrying my bag of school and sports gear round on one shoulder. Had to get a back pack instead."

Rush chuckled. "I had you down as a jock."

Young sighed. "Kinda, only to make sure I had the fitness requirements and the rounded school report. I did track, martial arts, swim team. No serious football, didn't wanna risk the injuries."

Lying on his side, Young was a little precariously balanced on the edge of the bed. It seemed a little weird to be laying here together in the daytime when they were not planning to sleep but he found he had no wish to get up. He threw an arm loosely over Rush's chest and propped himself up with a knee across Rush's thigh. Rush reached up and pulled the cover over them. Young settled into Rush's warmth.

"And your family?" Rush continued.

"Mom at home, Dad was a firefighter, two brothers, one sister, Clive is older, then me, then  Cathy and Max." He sighed. "Cathy and Max are firefighters like Dad, Clive is a part time bank teller and house husband, his wife is an editor for a newspaper."

Rush shifted so he could see Young's face. "Are they all married?"

"Yeah." Young said sourly. "They all loved Emily."

Rush's eyebrows furrowed. "So I guess they blamed you for the divorce then?"

Young sighed. "Yeah, good guess."

He shifted himself further down the bed, under the covers.

"Who did Emily tell about TJ?" Rush asked.

Young froze and stared at Rush.

"Not too far a jump of logic to make." Rush said evenly.

Young nodded slowly. "Clive's wife, Nicky," he said shortly, "they were always close. Still are according to Clive." He scowled. "Pretty good bet Clive and Nicky already know about David."

"Not about this though." Rush said with a small gesture of his free hand and a wry look.

Young's eyebrows rose and he paused a moment. "Whatever this is."

"Whatever this is," Rush echoed, "is still your secret."

xxxoooxxx

They spent the rest of the morning talking about innocuous topics, or at least as related to Destiny, music, literature, television which Young found himself surprised that Rush engaged with at all. There was a reasonably spectacular discussion about politics which did not quite become an argument. The discussion rambled on, right up to the point that Young's stomach announced itself loudly. He looked his watch and realised with some shock it was lunchtime already.

After a short argument, which Rush lost, Young repeated his actions of the morning, walking out, collecting food and returning with wraps and roast vegetables. The food stores were at their highest levels since they had arrived, but diversity was still low. He banged on the hatch with an elbow but there was no answer. He wondered if Rush had taken the opportunity to leave and contemplated calling out, but did not want to catch anyone else's attention. They were off the beaten track but sound echoed down Destiny's corridors and nowhere in the inhabited area was that far away from people. Scowling, he juggled the food and canteen, managing to catch the door release with his elbow and stepped into the room.

Rush was asleep, curled up on the bed in a tight ball. Young's irritation at being shut out evaporated. Rush looked vulnerable and strangely younger when he slept, his tired face still worn, but without the creases caused by his perpetual scowl or focused stare. The covers were half off him, but his hair had half fallen across his face. Young sat down on the edge of the bed and put the plates on the floor. Rush continued to sleep despite the movement of the mattress.

Young watched him for a moment, wondering exactly how little sleep the other man had had over the preceding few days to make him this exhausted. He wasn't sure he wanted to know. This was still a bizarre situation, and nothing he could have imagined when they arrived on Destiny. He stared at Rush, if someone had suggested he would have been in this position when he was on Icarus he would have told them they were insane. Things had changed so incredibly far, for everyone.

He bent and picked up his plate, eating silently while watching Rush sleep. He finished his food and took a swig from the canteen before shaking Rush's shoulder gently.

"Hey sleepy."

"Mmmph?"

"You need to eat." Young let a note of command edge into his voice.

Rush's answer was an indisinct but apparently negative mumble. He rolled Rush over bodily. The man uncurled as he was rolled onto his back.

"Fuck off." That utterance was distinct.

"Wake up Nick." Young poked him again. "Eat, drink, then you can sleep again." He considered a moment. "I'll even join you."

Rush rolled and glared at him, then pushed himself up to sitting, shoving his hair back off his face and kicking the blankets off.

"Eat." Young repeated firmly, pushing the plate at him.

Rush took the plate and ate, apparently hungry now he was awake. Young watched him, sipping from the canteen then passing it over when Rush had finished. He put the plate on the side and laid himself down again, sprawling on top of the blankets.

Rush closed the canteen, dumped the bottle by his head and to Young's slight surprise sprawled out along Young's side throwing an arm and leg over him and falling asleep almost instantly. Definitely tired. He yawned, folding his hand over the top of Rush's where it rested on his chest and dozed.

xxxoooxxx

Rush woke to Young shaking him gently.

"Hey, Nick."

He blinked and rubbed at his face before focussing on Young, who was staring into his face. Young was sitting up in bed next to him.

"We ought to get some dinner." Young said. "It's dinner time."

Rush took a deep breath and sat up. "Yeah, okay."

"Feeling better?" Young asked him.

It was a rather inane question he thought, but he answered anyway. "Somewhat." He straightened his shirts which were riding up his stomach. "Better than last night anyway."

Young stood and grabbed his pants from the one chair in the room. Rush looked away as he struggled into them, looking round for his own. His jeans had been laid over the end of the bed. He picked them up, noting the frayed patch on the ass which was liable to become a hole to match the small one already worn through the right knee where he kept kneeling down to repair things. Time to requisition some leather scraps for patches.

He pulled them on and stood up, stamping his feet into his shoes. Young was looking at him expectantly.

"Ready?"

"As always." He responded.

They walked out of the small room and made their way to the mess hall. Brody was in the corridor outside, apparently having just finished his own meal. He gave them a slightly surprised look.

"Apparently," Rush growled, "having a migraine does not excuse one from being forced to eat whatever is being served up in the mess."

Brody grinned, looking from Rush to Young and back again. "I hope you're feeling better."

"Better than I was this morning." Rush admitted sourly.

He strode past Brody and into the messhall, looking around for an empty seat. There was an entire empty table by the far wall and he grabbed the bowl that Becker held out to him and sat down. A few moments later Young slid in opposite him. Rush did not look up.

A foot poked his shin. "Are you okay?" Young asked quietly.

He squinted up through his hair. Young had not looked up either, was stirring the soup in his bowl with a piece of the heavy bread served up with it. Rush looked back down at his soup.

"I'm fine. I just didn't think you'd want your soldiers to know you've been fraternising with the enemy, so to speak." He muttered.

There was a long pause. "Thank you," Young said quietly, "I think."

Rush snorted but said nothing. They finished their meal in companionable silence. Rush listened to the late dinner time conversation around them. None of it appeared to be in relation to them. Scraping the last of the soup from his bowl with the last piece of bread he pushed his bowl away.

"So," he said, "am I permitted to go and see what my team have been doing in my absence?"

Young looked up at him and laughed. "I guess so."

"Good." Rush said looking around the room.

"See you later?" Young asked him in a low voice. "My place?"

Rush considered how much he might want some personal space and to get some work done, compared to the nightmares and unpleasantness he would likely have sleeping alone when he finally did have to get some sleep. There was no contest really, Young was a surprisingly low maintenance bed partner all things considered. He regarded Young for a moment, before speaking. "Yeah." He agreed.

Young nodded and Rush stood, catching Young's eye and giving a small nod before he walked out.

"Hey, you seem to be getting on better with Colonel Young."

Rush looked up at Eli's voice, shooting him a sour look. The young man fell in step with him.

"Hey," Eli said again, "Look, I think it's good you guys are friends..."

Rush schooled his expression to severity, hoping that Eli got the impression he was digging himself deeper into trouble.

"...it's not like you both have a lot of friends you know…" It evidently worked as Eli's voice faltered off.

"Thank you Eli for your concern about my interpersonal skills." Rush said allowing the irritation to bleed into his voice.

Eli winced and Rush twitched his lip in amusement.

"Now, do you want to tell me how you got on with the repairs to the air valve for the dome corridor?"

"It's not easy." Eli said. "I'm working without all the parts I need. I was thinking about seeing if there's an area we're not using where I can steal parts from," he waved his hand vaguely in the air, "'cause I mean it's not something we can go without anywhere we're using."

"Okay," Rush said. "I can make some time this evening now, we can run some scans and look for areas where the life support is already down and being covered by neighbouring areas."

Eli nodded thoughtfully. "That would do it."

"Then we can go and get one."

Eli regarded him cautiously before venturing "Are you sure you're..."

"Yes." Rush's voice was flat and hard.

"And Colonel Young won't..."

The look Rush shot Eli cut him off.

"Okay, okay!" Eli raised his hands in a placatory gesture. "Just trying to prevent a few hassles later you know."

Rush ignored the statement and they turned into the core interface room.

xxxoooxxx

Young stared at the list on the laptop screen. A lot of the previous projects had been focussed on a single place in the ship, a component that was broken, a specific hole in the hull, but the damage to the dome area was spread throughout that whole area of the ship and multi-systemic.

Not only had the heat damaged the dome itself, it had resulted in an influx of superheated gases to the room beneath. The inside of the dome room required extensive repairs which could not reasonably be completed until the dome itself was back in place. Additionally the heat bleed into surrounding areas had resulted in burned out or frankly melted components. Some could simply be pulled out and replaced, others required the whole section to be excised back to intact areas and replaced in it's entirety. It was an extensive piece of work and required a significant number of crew allocated to work at the tasks listed in front of him under the supervision of various members of the science team.

He leaned back in his chair and stared at the screen. He had only been up for a few hours, but he was already quite ready to go to bed, he stretched and went back to work. It was a task he could live without this evening, but it was only quarter past ten and he could not justify going to bed yet, at least not until this was finished.

The sound of the door startled him not quite an hour later. He looked up with a start. Rush wandered in, hitting the door closure behind him.

"I wasn't expecting you...this early." He said surprised as Rush walked over to the bed and sat down. In truth he had not really expected Rush to come at all, had considered it far more likely Rush would choose to work all night.

Rush deposited a thick but very battered paperback on the counter and emptied his pockets next to it, his radio, a mobile phone, notebook, pencil stub and a few other oddments in a heap. "It is my day off." Rush said, pulling off his outer shirt and kicking his shoes off. He gave Young a look. "And I don't fancy sleeping with my nightmares."

Young gave him a surprised look as he stripped off his pants and slid into the bed grabbing the book and opening it, back propped against the wall behind the bed.

"What are you reading?" He asked curiously.

"Stephen King's The Stand." Rush said. "It was Spencer's apparently. It was in the bag of his personal stuff Chu found hidden in the small square storage room." He looked up at Young. "I have no idea if it's any good."

"Doesn't matter." Young said trying not to sound too eager. "Can I have it after you?"

"Not read it?" Rush asked with a chuckle.

"Probably the only book on the ship I haven't."

"Me too, you can have it when I'm done."

Young stood and stripped quickly before sliding into the bed next to Rush. Rush was opening the front of the book, turning to the first page.

"Haven't you started it yet?" Young asked curiously.

Rush gave him a suspicious look. "You're going to read over my shoulder." He accused.

It was Young's turn to laugh. "Of course."

He leaned against Rush's side, resting his shoulder against the other man's. He heard Rush huff, but the man shifted his hold on the book slightly so it was tilted towards both of them, moving his arm slightly behind Young so he was more comfortable. Leaning into Rush, Young settled in to read the book Rush held.


	24. Breaking the tension

Being in FTL gave Young the time and relative security to order a complete survey of the accessible parts of the seed ship. Whilst many of the crew were involved with the work around the dome area, those who were not and were otherwise unoccupied, Young scheduled into surveying parties. The seed ship, with the exception of a couple of very badly damaged areas was in reasonably good condition, better than Destiny.

Starting with the bridge of the seedship and working outwards along the corridors known as safe towards the manufactory, rooms were catalogued and consoles photographed for identification as generic or specialised and what their particular use was. The science teams identified most of the rooms and consoles at least to the specialised or generic definition, and after Eli managed to rig up one of the holographic emitters in the observation lounge, the "What's my function?" game became a staple of the evening entertainment for a week or so. Although the guesses were usually wildly improbable.

Rush was another surprise. Despite the fact that he appeared to have gone back to his usual pattern of working late into the night and getting practically no sleep, he seemed to appear across the table from Young in the mess usually once a day, and over the fortnight had appeared in Young's room three times to sleep. Although once he had slid in at some point in the middle of the night, without waking Young, surprising him by his presence in the morning.

All in all it had been an almost pleasant couple of weeks. Which meant that he was going to enjoy this announcement even more than usual, he thought looking at the report from Inman. He stood and went to find her.

xxxoooxxx

"Inman has finished testing the last of the plants from down below." Young said as he walked into the core interface room. "There's a new tea. The plant that she pulled for further testing at the last minute after we'd collected eight crates."

Rush looked up. Young was grinning at him.

"And?" Rush demanded sourly. There must be something interesting about it to make him look so smug.

"It tastes pretty weird..." Young said slowly, looking extremely pleased with himself, "but apparently it has caffeine in it."

Rush blinked.

"I'm rationing it." Young said with a smirk.

"Bastard." Rush said without much heat.

Young chuckled and walked away. Rush realised Brody and Eli were staring at him.

"What?" he snapped.

"Did you really just call the Colonel a bastard and he just laugh and walk away?" Eli asked.

Volker looked nervous and Brody just tilted his head to one side, waiting for the response.

"No." Rush said flatly, "evidently it was a figment of your imagination as nothing like that could ever happen."

" _Not without the universe exploding from a serious warp in reality."_ Eli muttered.

"Sorry?" Rush's voice was sharp.

"Nothing."

"Then I suggest you get your tools and go and collect the next air valve then." He said pointedly.

Brody and Eli grabbed radios and equipment and left quickly. He glared at Volker, who was still giving him a strange look.

"What are you waiting for?" He snapped.

"Uh...nothing." Volker faltered.

"Well, being as you're due on the bridge for your shift in," he checked the time on his phone, "forty minutes, I suggest you go and get some food while you still can."

Volker left the room at speed and Rush sighed and shut down the console. Sometimes being in charge here was not too far different from supervising students, age difference notwithstanding. He ran down his mental list of tasks, check on Barnes and Atienza who were supervising removal of damaged panelling near the dome, get lunch and catch up with Chloe for some calculations after she came off her bridge shift.

Chloe had taken over quite a large number of the bridge shifts, covering for the rest of the science team who were engaged in repairs as her skills were still focused on the theoretical rather than practical. However he needed her to run some scans checking the effects as various parts were replaced, and also to re-run some calculations on power flows around the dome and also through the cold area to see if a second eye over the problem concurred with his own assessments. He did not really doubt it would, but no sensible scientist relied on only one assessment of risk before considering trying anything risky.

He walked out to the dome area. Sidling past a stack of heat warped bulkhead panels he found Barnes, Atienza and a team of four in the centre of a corridor stripped of panelling, bare structure, conduits and systems open to the air. The group were carefully manhandling a new bulkhead panel off a kino sled and onto a stack of three more in the centre of the corridor. He waited till they had finished, looking around, noting the careful stack of reclaimed rivets and scrap metal in a crate lid, ready to be recycled in the manufactory. The group finished and Barnes turned to Rush.

"Doctor Rush." She greeted him. "We're almost done with this corridor. She gestured at the stack of bulkhead panels. "We just need to bring the rest of the new panels in and take the scrap back to the manufactory. We should be done before dinner."

"Good." He said, meaning it, they were now a day and a half ahead of schedule. "Are you all still off shift tomorrow?"

Only one of the group shook his head. Rush pursed his lips.

"Fine, well the rest of you, Calvos is starting teaching a basic Ancient course in the observation lounge tomorrow, I suggest make sure you're there." He paused a moment. "Good work" He added, then walked off.

"Learn Ancient?" He heard behind him, a stage whisper. "Us?" One of the airmen in a faintly disbelieving voice.

"Well I'm going to go." That was definitely Barnes. "If we stay here it's useful and if we go back it'll be better for my promotion..."

He walked out of earshot, trying not to laugh. He gave it about three months before Barnes was part of the science team.

xxxoooxxx

Young watched as the airman in the chair twitched and looked around in surprise.

"Doctor Jones?" He asked.

The man focussed on him and nodded.

"I'm Colonel Young, welcome to Destiny." Young stepped forward and held out his hand. "Pleased to meet you. It's a bit odd the first time. Not used the stones before?"

The man shook his hand. "No, first time."

"Well, welcome to the other side of the universe. This is Eli Wallace, one of our science team, he'll give you a bit of an orientation and show you the manufactory. Hopefully I will see you at lunch."

Eli greeted the still a little bemused scientist and shepherded him off out of the room. Behind Young another airman sat in the chair. As Young turned the airman reached out for the stone and as soon as it hit the plate he looked up and stared at Young.

"Everett?"

The inflection and accent was unmistakeable. "David. I wasn't expecting you."

"I wasn't expecting to come." He said, standing. "But I'm here to bring back Airman Stanford. His wife has called, a medical emergency, his daughter has cancer."

The statement stopped Young's irritated train of thought dead in it's tracks. He pulled out his radio.

"This is Young, Lieutenant Johansen are you available."

"Johansen here. I'm in the infirmary. I'm not busy."

"I'll be there shortly."

xxxoooxxx

Young sat at the counter, resting on his elbow, chin propped on his fist, staring into space a mug of tea gone cold in front of him. He should get up, go somewhere, do something, but he was too tired. Too tired to do anything but too stressed to want to even find his way to bed. He contemplated going and getting his ration of Brody's hooch, but he had been avoiding that. Avoiding it enough that his personal ration was building up. He guessed he could save it. Maybe donate it next time they had something to actually celebrate. Alcohol was not a good idea for him right at the moment. He was too tired to even run.

Young sighed, checking his watch, it was gone midnight. He was tired, in a bad mood and his knee ached. He had been concentrating all day on being supportive to Airman Stanford, organising a schedule for him on the stones to get the most time possible with his family and when he got back concentrating on not hitting David. He really did not want to be alone.

What he wanted, being completely honest with himself, was to go to bed and curl up and sleep for at least seven hours, ideally with Rush. He wondered about the likelihood of inducing Rush to come to bed. He was entirely not sure how Rush would take any such request. He stared at the cold mug again. Still, even being rebuffed he did not have that much to lose did he? At least it would get him up from here, break into the inertia of exhaustion.

He stood and left the room. The original agreement had been if they had a very bad day they would likely fall into bed together, Rush's words not his, so he was going to find Rush.

He eventually found Rush at a console just outside of the area under repair round the dome. Young looked around. The area was deserted, he had not seen anyone in the corridors since he had left the observation lounge, and Rush was unsurprisingly alone. He walked towards Rush, but the man did not look up as Young approached.

"Nick." Young opened.

"Colonel." Rush said in irritation, still staring at the screen.

So that was how it was going to be. "You don't even know why I'm here." He countered.

"I can imagine." Rush said sardonically.

"It's late Nick."

"I'm aware of that."

"You're still working." Young shifted and leaned against the wall.

"I haven't finished it yet."

"When will you be finished?" Young tried to keep his voice calm.

Rush looked at Young over his shoulder, scowling. "It won't be completed any faster with you hassling me."

Young shrugged. "You need to sleep."

"I _need_ to finish this set of diagnostics so that the work can continue in the morning." Rush said and turned back to the console.

Young watched him for a few moments realising he was getting nowhere. He needed a complete change of tack here. He mused for a while as Rush tapped at the console, what was most likely to make Rush consider finishing up here for the night. He wanted to drag Rush off, pull him into bed, curl up in the warmth and hide.

"Watching me is not going to make any difference to the outcome of these diagnostics." Rush growled.

He took another look around and listened for a moment, wondering who would hear if he just asked. There was no-one around as far as he could tell. He considered tapping Rush on the shoulder, but discarded the idea as counterproductive as Rush was liable to snap at him. Impulsively he decided to damn all proprieties and walked up behind Rush, putting his arms round the other man. Rush froze.

"Staying up all night is not going to enhance your productivity." Young said, not letting go and resting his chin on Rush's shoulder.

Despite how risky this felt, to be this close in a public area, he could feel himself wanting to fold himself into the warmth coming from Rush.

"Trying to do this when I've got a horde of morons buzzing round like flies on shit is even less productive." Rush snapped back.

"Fine." Young responded firmly, "That suits me, I'll borrow them for the morning to look at some of the arising issues on the seedship." He settled his arms round Rush's waist, stepping a little further in to lean into the warmth of his back. "Then you can have them back when you're finished."

"What are you doing?" Rush asked, still standing stiffly, but no longer concentrating on the screen.

"I'm tired, today's kinda taken it out of me." Young said with a sigh. "I've been managing David all day and TJ and I had to go back to Earth with Stanford for a two hour meeting. His kid's been diagnosed with leukaemia and we've been trying to arrange for a consistent replacement for him to exchange with on a regular basis." He let his head rest against the side of Rush's. Rush's hair was ticklish against his cheek. "I wanna go to bed, but I could do with some company." He admitted.

"So you're cuddling me in a corridor." Rush said. "Seems a little dangerous, considering we're where anyone could walk up."

Young could not see Rush's face but he sounded amused and his body relaxed a little.

"I've not seen anyone since I left the observation lounge, and this area is off limits to anyone who isn't part of a repair crew. There shouldn't be anyone walking around in this area." Young countered. "Not even you on your own. But it got your attention though." Young felt a little embarrassed. "Anyway, we do it all the time." He said a little defensively. Damn, he felt about twelve asking like this.

"Not in this context." Rush said wryly. "But yes. We do now I suppose." His head tilted down to the console and his hands began to move again. "Let me finish this. I suppose I can leave the longer diagnostics running."

He tilted his head so he could see down the corridor and kept an ear out for any sounds, but rested himself against Rush and let himself just appreciate the physical contact while Rush worked on whatever he was doing. It still amazed him that he had not realised how much he missed physical contact and something that at least passed for vague affection from someone until this bizarre situation had occurred. He sighed and one of Rush's hands brushed lightly over the back of his knuckles where his hand rested on Rush's stomach.

"How is the child?" Rush asked.

"Huh?" Young asked, miles away in his own thoughts.

"Airman Stanford's child?"

"Oh, they're pretty positive she's gonna make a full recovery with treatment."

"Good." Rush said.

"She's twelve and she's gonna lose all her hair with the chemo, but Stanford spoke to her on the phone and was saying she's already planning on what wigs she wants. At the moment she's thinking of a long blonde one and a pink one apparently."

Rush chuckled.

"The air force is covering all her medical bills and they're relocating the family temporarily to closer to Homeworld Command so that Stanford can be there as much as possible, even for short periods."

Rush locked the screen and turned. Young relaxed his arms enough so that Rush could spin round, and he was surprised again when Rush wrapped his arms round his shoulders and hugged.

"How old is she?"

"Twelve." Young said. "And she's already read into the programme so she knows her dad is in different bodies."

"Good."

Young rested his head on Rush's shoulder, glad that Rush just let him stay there for a moment.

"What was the problem with Telford?" Rush asked.

Young huffed out a breath against Rush's neck. "He wants his crew to be involved in the exploration of the seedship."

Rush snorted. "He would."

"But can you see Gutierrez' team being happy to just catalogue and move on?" Young asked. "I just don't trust them not to touch anything or to know what's liable to blow up on them."

Rush let out a proper laugh. "I thought I was meant to be the distrustful obstructive one?" He asked sardonically.

"You probably trust them even less than I do." Young said. "And I trust Gutierrez even less than I do David. He has that kid in a candy store look every time he gets here." He said sourly.

"I knew I'd bring you round to my way o' thinking eventually." Rush said sounding amused.

Young chuckled, but didn't reply, just relaxing into the comfort of physical contact. He realised he was swaying slightly and shifted which made him wince as his weight shifted across his aching knee.

"Your knee?" Rush asked.

"Yeah." Young said. "One of Gutierrez minions swapped with me. I have no idea what he was doing, but it feels like he's been on his knees all day."

"They were examining the corridor with all the bulkhead panels removed." Rush said. "The one Barnes' team have just stripped for repairs. I've powered down everything but the lighting so I didn't think they could do much damage."

"Probably was on his damn knees all day." Young shifted his weight uncomfortably.

"Is Telford still here?" Rush shifted an arm round Young's waist slipping his shoulder under Young's arm so he was taking some of Young's weight.

Young tried not to sigh again with the relief as it took some pressure off his knee. "Yeah. There was a quick game of musical chairs with bodies so Telford could swap with Stanford."

"I'm not surprised he's putting himself forward to swap with Stanford. He's just itching to get more time here." Rush released his arms a little. "Come on. Let's get some sleep."

xxxoooxxx

Rush looked down at the console. He had analysed the diagnostics that had run overnight and run a few more based on the output of the original outputs, pulling up the results at his usual console in the core interface room, blissfully unharrassed by the rest of the science team or random crew. True to his word the previous night Young had kept them all busy on the seedship all morning.

Considering the fact they were over a day ahead of the planned schedule it had not made much of a difference taking the time out last night and it was clear that Young had needed the time out. Damn Telford, always managing to throw some sort of spanner in the works.

He saved his results, copied them across to his laptop and unplugged it from the console. It was past the time that Becker would be serving lunch and he suspected he would find most of the science team in the mess hall as well as Young. Now he was finished he could find Young and reclaim his minions.

He left his laptop in the small conference room and walked to the messhall, wandering in and looking around the crowded room for Young. The science team were clustered around a couple of tables and he acknowledged Eli's overly cheerful wave with a brief nod but continued scanning the room, failing to find Young. Lieutenant Scott was sitting at a nearby table with TJ and Chloe and Rush walked over.

"Where's Young?" Rush asked Scott without preamble.

Scott looked up. "On the bridge with Colonel Telford."

Rush scowled. That was the last thing he needed. He strode out.

Telford and Young were standing on the balcony looking down at the Bridge, Young standing in a parody of his normal relaxed parade rest style stance, hands clasped behind his back. Camile was in the chair and from the set of her shoulders she was as tense as Young was. Young's tension was obvious to Rush, he could see Young's muscles were tight and the hands clasped behind his back were white knuckled.

"I don't understand why Rush won't let Gutierrez join in with the repair effort." Telford said to Young before turning to see who had walked in the door.

"Because he doesn't know the ship, he annoys the repair crews with stupid questions and gets distracted." Rush snapped. "I...we...need these repairs completed quickly and efficiently. Allowing Gutierrez to participate would negate both of those. If Osborne and Fong want to participate they can, they at least know how to follow orders, Colonel."

Telford looked furious.

"Rush..."

"I'm sorry," Rush cut in, "I only came to find Colonel Young." He turned to Young, "I need you to agree this latest work plan, we're ahead on the power conduits and ready to move on to the life support."

Young nodded. He turned back to Telford. "I'd better go get this out of the way. I'll catch up with you later."

"I'll come..."

Rush cut in again. "I'm sure I don't need two Colonel's to check the work roster."

Telford gave him a suspicious look and a glower, but Young was already walking throguh the door.

"I'll catch up with you later." Rush told Telford. "I've got some information I'd like you to pass onto Doctor Jones at Area 51 about the dome glass. It should make manipulating it easier."

Telford nodded suspiciously and Rush walked out, closing the door after him.

Rush walked up the corridor, looking both ways at the t-junction, looking for Young. Young was leaning against the wall a few yards away, face strained. As Rush walked up to him, Young raised his hand in front of him.

"Don't..." Young said in irritation, "just...don't. I know I'm not handling this well."

Rush looked at the expression on his face, then reached his hand out and interlaced their fingers. Young flinched, then furrowed his forehead in confusion, staring down at their joined hands in front of his chest. Rush squeezed his hand silently for a moment, then let go, turning to walk away.

"The rotas are on my laptop in the small conference room next to the core room." He said over his shoulder.

Footsteps behind him told him Young was following. He turned into the small room and waiting for Young closed the hatch as the man walked in. Young stopped and took a deep breath. Rush reached out took his shoulder and turned Young to face him.

"You okay?" He asked.

"Yeah." Young said nodding. "He's just pushing and pushing. It'd be annoying enough even without knowing..."His voice tailed off.

"Quite." Rush said. "What are you going to do about it?"

"He's pushing me to make concessions for Gutierrez on the seed ship." Young said. "Which I'm not willing to make. Gutierrez can't wait to get his hands on it."

"So what are you going to offer?" Rush asked, dropping his arm from the other man's shoulder and scratching his beard.

Young shrugged. "I'd thought to suggest Telford gets involved with the seedship survey himself." He moved away and sat in the chair nearest them, leaning heavily on the table. "He's got the most detailed knowledge of the seedships of any of us."

"Presuming the layout is the same, yes." Rush agreed. "And he's less likely to injure himself or anyone else accidentally, having a better idea of the ship, and less novelty value. It would keep him busy and out of your hair. He may even actually know what some of it is."

Young gave him a quizzical look. "Something that he hasn't offered already?"

"If I was feeling generous I'd say he hadn't had the opportunity to use any knowledge he has in a useful context." Rush paused. "In practice, I doubt he'd share anything he didn't have to."

"You really think that?" Young said curiously.

"I wouldn't," Rush said bluntly, "were I in his position."

Young looked at him for a long moment. Rush wondered briefly if that had been the right thing to say.

"But you're telling me everything now." Young said. It was not quite a question, more a statement Young was daring him to contradict.

"Even if you don't trust me still, it's in my best interests to cooperate with you." Rush said quietly. "We seem to be working from broadly the same game plan."

Young looked at him again, it seemed a long time but was not more than a couple of seconds. Rush tried not to tense or look guilty, just for a change he currently had no reason to. Not that Young knew that, and not that it would not change in the future if it was required for the benefit of mission or crew.

"We do." Young said. "And bizarrely Nick, at least at the moment I trust you."

"You should." Rush shot back, "I'm the one who's got your back here."

"And isn't that a strange turn up of events." Young countered.

Rush stared at him, their eyes locking, he reached out and put his hand on Young's arm, going to say something when Young turned into the touch, leaning forward in what appeared an unconscious motion to....to what? Their eyes were still locked and Young tensed as if he realised what he had done and ducked his head away with an uncomfortable laugh. Rush snorted out a chuckle himself at the sheer absurdity of the situation and Young looked up.

Their eyes caught again, and then, almost as one, they started to laugh. Proper laughter breaking the tension. Rush blinked as Young stepped into his space, giving him a hug.

"Thanks." Young told him. "I needed this."


	25. Pressure

Rush watched the console below him, kino feed of the repair crew, Eli, Brody, Atienza and Ramirez on one side of the screen and a control panel on the other.

"Okay," Brody's voice was slightly tinny from the Kino feed, "that's the last squingy connecting the power relay."

Rush watched as they all stepped away from the bank of large components. Brody slammed the cage door that housed the system.

"Are you ready Mr Brody, Chloe?" Rush asked.

Both agreed simultaneously, the team on the kino feed backing away further. Rush reached out and slid the power control, reconnecting the relay, watching the feed intently. Nothing happened.

"Mr Brody?"

"Nothing this end."

"Chloe?"

There was a pause from Chloe as she manipulated something on the screen.

"One second." She said. "Let me run the recording again."

Rush waited impatiently.

"Okay." She said. "The relay itself is fine, there's a surge in pressure along the preceding section as it comes online, but the sensors are not reporting anything the system isn't intended to handle." She tapped at the screen. "I'll watch the same point when they do the next one."

"Doctor Rush this is TJ." The voice echoed from two radios.

Rush pulled out his radio. "Lieutenant Johansen, this is Rush, what is it."

"Can I see you in the infirmary Doctor Rush?"

Rush scowled. "Is it important?"

"Yes." TJ's voice was firm.

"Fine." Rush snapped, "I'll see you in a few minutes." He put the radio down and depressed the key to speak through the kino. "Mr Brody?"

Brody looked up at the kino from where he and Eli were checking the connections on the valve. "Yeah?"

"I need to go see Lieutenant Johansen. You and Eli can do the next two valves and Chloe can keep taking measurements to see if the data replicates. I'll meet you back here in half an hour."

"Okay." Brody said affably.

Rush nodded to Chloe who smiled at him and went back to the console as he walked out.

xxxoooxxx

TJ watched from her desk as Rush walked into the room and up to where Susannah was examining Young's knee. He had not even spared a look for anything except the pair of them, walking up beside where Young was sitting, legs stretched out on a bed, and looking what Susannah was doing on the opposite side of the bed.

There was a brief exchange and Young and Rush swapped places, Rush sitting sideways on the bed, legs hanging down. Young leaned forward putting a hand on his shoulder leaning over his other shoulder to look

She could not hear their quiet voices from here, but she watched in interest as Rush tensed, words were said, and then relaxed. Rush shifted in his seat on the bed, his body leaning microscopically closer to Young. TJ did not think it was even a conscious act. Susannah was now talking to them both and Young was leaning round Rush to see what she was indicating and responding to her. From TJ's position it was evident he pretty much had his arm round Rush's shoulders.

Susannah was obviously discussing Rush's hands with both of them, as if they both had a personal stake in Rush's recovery. Whilst Rush appeared to be griping at what both Susannah and Young were saying, it did not appear that he was griping at Young's involvement, more about the specifics of his contribution. TJ doubted that either of them had noticed that either.

As they descended into a bickering match about something or other, Susannah looked over their shoulders and caught TJ's eye. The grin she gave TJ suggested that Susannah had noticed it though.

She stood, her chair scraping as she pushed it out. Young and Rush both jumped and as she walked over, and moved apart.

"What's the news?" She asked Susannah.

Susannah smiled. "Well the good news is that Nicholas' hands are looking very good." She redirected her look at Rush. "That doesn't mean you can start abusing them, and you should still avoid getting them cold." She said sternly.

TJ grinned and glanced at Young as Rush slipped off of the bed.

"And the Colonel?" She asked.

"Not so good." Susannah said. "Not bad, but you need to take it easy." She told him. "Use your cane and rest it whenever it begins to hurt, keep mobile, but don't overdo it."

Young nodded his agreement. "I'll do my best." He offered.

"Well, you know what the consequences are." Susannah warned him.

Young nodded again. "Yeah." He turned to Rush. "Come on Rush, show me what your team are doing before Telford catches up with me and starts talking at me."

She watched the pair walk out.

"They seem..." Susannah seemed to be seeking the right words for a moment, "comfortable together." She finished with a smile.

TJ nodded. "They appear to have settled their differences a bit." She said, cautious of her words.

Susannah chuckled. "It looks good on them."

xxxoooxxx

Young was pleased they did not meet Telford on their way back to the core interface room. The science team were all back in the room, clustered round a console.

"What did you find Brody?" Rush asked as they walked into the room.

Brody shot a look at Young.

"The colonel is interested in how the work in progressing." Rush said easily. "Now, are you going to tell me what you all found out about the valve or am I going to need to review the data myself from scratch?" He demanded with a heavy overtone of irritation.

The science team jumped to move back from the console and allow Rush in to look at the data. Young looked over Rush's shoulder as he bent towards the console.

"It's a surge in the flow as the valve comes open." Brody said insinuating a hand inbetween Rush and the console to pull up a diagram instead of the pane of ancient figures. "I can go into detail on the fluid dynamics if you want."

Young was certain Rush would have listened, but he could see Eli, Chloe and Volker were already beginning to look a little blank.

"Just tell us what it means Brody." Young said.

"The pressure increases quite a bit in the valve and along the conduit for a short time every time you open a valve."

"Fine." Rush said shortly. "So is it likely to be a problem?"

"It shouldn't be. We were able to strip down and examine the valve we took from the stairwell and it looks like the valve and connectors are more heavily built than the conduit itself, the pressure is well within tolerances, even in the central air conduits like this which are at high pressure. Chloe and I have run a few more tests on other valves in outlying areas and the same thing happens." He shrugged. "It looks like it's normal, that there's probably a reason for it, I just haven't worked out exactly what it is yet." Brody admitted. "I've got a few ideas though."

"Such as?" Young asked.

"Cleaning mechanism for venting gas or cleaning out dust in the lower pressure vents? I mean you have to think that there'd be some sort of way for cleaning the air system like there is the water. If you left the vents open and allowed the pressure surge to vent from the main conduit, it would blow through the vents pretty hard."

"Fine." Rush repeated. "As we have no evidence otherwise and Destiny isn't indicating it's a flaw in anyway, we'll treat it as normal then."

Young stepped back from the console to look at the science team. "So, how are we doing with the work plan?"

"The power relays and conduits are completely finished." Rush said.

Young looked up, noting the faint look of relief on his face.

"That was the most dangerous part right?"

Rush gave a nod. "Yeah. We could have electrocuted ourselves, melted components or blown up half the corridor." He said. "Presuming Mr Brody's final checks and the last set of diagnostics have all come up clear," Rush looked at Brody who nodded, "we're done with them for the moment."

"What's next?" Young asked. "Are you moving straight on to the ventilation systems as per the plan? That's what all this is right?"

"We're a couple of days ahead of schedule." Rush said. "I want to check the air scrubbers in the dome area. There's one that's not been set running, not refilled with the grey carbon sequestration material," he clarified, "but that's a quick job."

"Why don't you take a day off." Young said. "It's not like we can get any further than doing these bits until we drop out of FTL right?"

Young could see the hopeful looks on the faces of the science team clustered behind Rush.

Rush nodded thoughtfully, with an amused half smile that the team behind him couldn't see. "It would give the groups working on the bulkhead replacement a chance to catch up, and us a chance to look at a few of the smaller more _personal_ projects. Brody has a project with Calvos he wants to work on, Eli and Chloe are still playing with the wi-fi in their spare time and Volker will no doubt want to spend time with Park." The last was a little disparaging.

"Hey," Volker said defensively, "we're translating medical data from the database and I'm faster at reading it to her than Doctor Adams."

Rush snorted without turning, but Young gave Volker an encouraging look.

"Good." Young said then. "Agreed, take the rest of today and tomorrow off and get back to work the morning after."

The science team all tensed, waiting to see if Rush would contradict Young or get angry.

"Well," Rush said, "it'll give me a chance to catch up on investigating about the manufactory won't it."

Young smiled at the broad grins that spread across the faces of the scientists, Rush reading their response on Youngs face and rolling his eyes.

"Right, well, I'll let you all get on with your time off." Rush said, going to move away.

"Err," Brody interrupted him before he could leave, "Calvos and I wanted to ask you a couple of things about carving wood..."

With a smile Young left.

xxxoooxxx

Young strode out of the conference room, fuming. Damn scientist, just would not let up. Notwithstanding the fact that his group were using almost all of the available stones time, with two of his staff actively participating in the work, and even without Telford here, he was still pushing.

"Everett!" O'Neill's voice rang out behind him. "My office, now."

Young turned and followed O'Neill into his office. O'Neill's secretary regarded them curiously as they walked past, getting up to stand in the doorway as they sat down.

"You have a meeting with the…" The secretary started.

"Stall him." O'Neill instructed. "An hour."

The secretary nodded, shutting the door after him. O'Neill sat down behind his desk and at his gesture Young took a chair opposite.

"So," O'Neill said, "what's the trouble with Gutierrez this time?"

Young shrugged. "He hasn't got what he wanted. He wants to be involved in the work on Destiny, wants access to the manufactory."

"I thought you'd compromised with David." O'Neill said with a frown.

Young shrugged. "I had, Rush has two of Gutierrez scientists working on the dome project with Eli rebuilding parts of the air system, and David's actually leading up the exploration of the seedship for me."

O'Neill raised an eyebrow in genuine surprise. "That's a pretty big concession."

Young sat back in his chair. "David has the most experience on a seedship. He spent several weeks on one with the Ursini and he's smart enough not to take risks poking things or randomly opening hatches. He's also got the skills to manage the teams on the fly in potentially risky situations. He was the best choice for the job."

He tried to keep his face professional. He evidently succeeded as O'Neill tapped a finger on the table meditatively, considering Young.

"I'm surprised, considering your history and the complaints that have been leveled against you and Rush that you're blocking SGC access to technology."

Young sighed, looking away in irritation. "We're primarily concerned about our own survival." He admitted. "There's a good chance we're never coming back and everyone knows it. Our level of risk assessment is always going to come out more cautious than Gutierrez' and Telford's." Young paused to consider his response, be fair in his assessments, try and take the personal issues out of them. He squashed his personal reaction to David ruthlessly.

"Telford's pretty focussed on getting us back, and I don't always think he considers that we're making dual plans based on the fact that we might not get anyone back. We can't afford to ignore the fact that our return is not assured and every time we've tried it has failed. He's the only one who made it back and we're looking at long term survival on Destiny. David's whole focus is getting us home."

O'Neill nodded.

"Even if we could get some people back, some of us want to stay including most of the science team." Young continued. "So I'm reasonably confident that we're gonna maintain access to all the science Gutierrez is desperate to get his hands on."

Young's voice was irritated, even thinking about the scientist wound him up more than he had expected, Telford he knew he was pissed off with and why. Rush was obviously rubbing off on him more than he'd thought. Still he did not have a personal relationship or any history with Gutierrez and the guy still managed to annoy the hell out of him, so maybe he was justified in his negative reactions to Gutierrez. He could see O'Neill was waiting for him to explain.

"He's constantly pushing for access now, to work with things now, even when that conflicts with our survival plans. He's monopolised the stones time for himself and his two assistants and he's not willing to rein himself in and work at a reasonable pace, it's like managing a child."

"Gutierrez is a good scientist." O'Neill's voice was stern, his face implacable. "I'm more than aware of the conflicts that you and Rush have had with him and Telford, but you have to work with him. His team are the team working with all the data you're sending back and they're making good progress with it. Some of your findings from Destiny are already working their way into gear our scientists are creating here."

Young tried to stop the breath he was holding huff out in irritation. He failed.

"It's his manner," he said, "the others are more accepting of the tensions we've got on the ship, the pressures we've got to survive. Gutierrez acts like he doesn't care about the risks we're running just living there each day." Young shrugged. "And I'll be honest sir, I resent his constant suggestions that we're getting in the way of progress when w're living hand to mouth out there with the likelihood we'll never get home."

O'Neill gave him a look equally frustrated and sympathetic. "Look, the best I can do is have a word with Telford and see if I can get the team to actually pay attention to the pressures  you're working under out there, but cutting Gutierrez out completely isn't gonna solve your problems Everett." He stood and Young copied. "It might help if you could get Rush back here again. The thing with the glass he shared last time impressed a lot of people. If you can get him to bring back more stuff like that there's a better chance of getting Gutierrez off your back." He walked out from behind the desk. "You've been around long enough Everett, you know the kind of political pressure there is to make these projects worthwhile in terms of costs."

Young frowned. "And the Destiny mission is a drain on their finances." He said flatly.

O'Neill paused a moment. "The dome glass went a long way to balancing that, it's going to solve a number of problems, not just for us. It's being deliberately leaked to NASA for use on their projects."

Young nodded. "I'll see what I can do about Rush." He said, as O'Neill took a step towards the door. "I'll see you next week, sir."

"Everett." O'Neill acknowledged, opening the door for him.

Everett departed.

He waited out the entirety of his appointed time at Homeworld Command, having deliberately exchanged with a food scientist who Inman had scheduled time with. He read up on the general news from the SGC, sent a couple of emails to colleagues and finished by reading up and trying to memorise as much sport news as possible to pass onto the crew. They could do with the boost.

The stones room on Destiny was busier than usual as he arrived, Telford in Stanford's body was waiting by the door, Eli was shifting from foot to foot next to him and Airman Dunning was looking distinctly nervous in the doorway. He looked them over.

"Eli, whatever it is, I'll see you in at my desk in thirty minutes."

Eli gave him a slight grin and left.

"Dunning, what's the problem?"

"Lieutenant Scott asked me to pass on that he needs to see you about the training schedule and then I've got my scheduled shore leave."

"Good, I'll catch him later. I'll get out of your way." He stood and walked over to Telford. "David? What can I do for you?"

He walked out, Telford dropping into step next to him.

"I think Rush is still giving me the run around." Telford said.

Young turned his head to glance at him. He looked quite calm.

"Rush does that just to stop himself getting bored." Young said. "I'm pretty damn certain from his reports, from your reports and from the rest of hte science team he's being pretty much upfront about everything on the seedship project with you. If he's jerking you about it's almost certainly just for the amusement value."

Telford huffed out a laugh. "You really think he's that unprofessional?"

Young gave him a sideways look. "He's stuck doing general maintenance, I think there's a good chance he's that bored."

Telford nodded as if he was at least partly agreeing with Young's point of view.

"If I were you I'd ignore it." Young advised him. "He'll probably get bored and start on me or Gutierrez."

Telford did let out a laugh on this. There was silence as they walked another half corridor, then turned into Young's room.

"So," Young paused as they walked over to the desk and turned to Telford, "where are you at with the seedship."

xxxoooxxx

"Young."

"One moment." Young continued to read the text in front of him, the final training plan from Scott and James and the outline of a series of basic science seminars from Eli and Park.

"This won't take long." Rush said impatiently.

"Give me a moment."

"Look…" Rush reached out and put a hand on Young's shoulder.

Young started and looked up. Rush was standing close to him, hand resting on his shoulder.

Rush went to step back, as if he was expecting Young to be annoyed, but Young tiredly put a hand over his where it resting on his shoulder, stopping him moving away.

"Sorry." Young said, gathering himself. "What is it?"

"We'll be ready to start work on the dome as soon as we drop out of FTL." Rush said, "The seed ship has stopped making dome panels and moved onto the struts for the dome. Based on what the manufactory is telling me, Brody says we'll have six more than we actually need of each. I've requested the manufactory move onto making conduit after that."

Young grinned broadly at him, squeezing Rush's hand reflexively. "Do we need conduit?"

"We need everything. But yes, it is on the priority list. It's used by a lot of the systems and we've been cannibalising from other areas. It's also something I can actually identify and we have the materials to make."

Young nodded. "How long till the life support is fixed around the dome?"

"If we don't close any of the bulkheads, there's sufficient in the surrounding area that's it's livable around the dome already, but Brody estimates four days work. Another two days, with the three working parties we have, to replace the damaged conduit and valves, then another half day for Brody and Volker to test and check the work."

"So, not long then."

"No." Rush said, sitting down on the edge of Young's desk.

"What did Telford want? Eli said he'd cornered you when you got back from Earth."

"To tell me he thinks you're jerking him about."

Rush snorted. "I am jerking him about."

Young chuckled as well. "Yeah, but not in the way he thinks."

"When did you last eat?" Rush asked him.

Young gave him an amused look. "You? You're asking _me_ that?"

"Well I have to return the favour sometime." Rush said. "Come on, Becker's almost finished serving."

Young's knee cracked loudly as he stood. Rush gave him another look.

"I've got some data I need to work with on the laptop this evening." Rush said, his eyes flicking to the bed. "You want some company?"

Young nodded, stretching his leg cautiously before he started to walk. "Yeah, I'd like that." He looked at Rush, who looked a little uncomfortable, shifty even. "What's up, Rush?"

Rush paused and stuffed a hand into one of the back pockets of his jeans.

"Yours is dead." Rush said.

Young looked at him in confusion at the complete non-sequitur.

He held his hand out and when Young reciprocated, dropped a comb into his hand. Young looked up at him in surprise, not something he had expected, though he would admit he had coveted the comb Rush had made himself.

"Bone," Rush said a little gruffly, "from the plains planet herbivores."

Young turned it over in his hand. It had wide teeth, and to his slight surprise was decorated with a complex pattern of Celtic knot work in the form of what he assumed was dogs. It was beautiful.

He traced the pattern with a finger. "It's incredible." He said, looking up and smiling at Rush. "You put a lot of work into it."

Rush coloured. "I like carving, something to do with my hands while I’m thinking."

Young nodded, not pushing the issue. "Hey, you want a game of chess after dinner?"

Rush nodded. "I could be persuaded."

Young gave him a broad smile. “What do I have to do to persuade you?”

 


	26. Inconceivable occurences

Dinner was different. For the first time in some time, there was a significant change in the meal. Young had known Becker and Inman had been working on some of the foodstuffs Inman had deemed edible, but Becker had stuck to things that worked already in the interim. Today's dinner was a quiche. Kind of. With no eggs. Apparently it was made with something from a creature they had hunted on Thick Woods.

Young decided it was better not to ask for details. It was the same texture, if not the same taste, as quiche. The taste was rather meaty, but the vegetables in the not-eggs were familiar, the radishy stuff, omnipresent roots and something slightly flaky.

Rush appeared to be eating it with gusto. Young looked round the mess hall, the general response appeared very good. Anything different was always welcome, the complete lack of novelty in their lives and diet was a strong motivator to being broad-minded on what one ate. They finished their dinner in silence, washing it down with a green strongly herbal tea.

Rush grimaced. "This is like drinking mouthwash." He groused.

Young chuckled. "Better than water." He offered.

"I'm not so sure about that."

They decamped to the Observation Lounge for a game of chess. Rush had grabbed his ration of hooch and they sipped as they played, Young feeling slightly more secure drinking in company than alone. Young lost most of the games as usual, but there was an air of relaxation, of contentment that had settled around him and he did not really care.

Even the slightly clandestine route to bed, separating in different directions and finally joining Rush in his quarters to fall into bed was not enough to disrupt his calm. He suddenly realised how tired he actually was, but slightly mellow from the alcohol and the relaxing evening, he lay awake for some time, curled against Rush’s back, listening to the other man breathe softly in sleep and appreciating the warmth and the knowledge he was not alone.

xxxoooxxx

"TJ this is Barnes, there's been an explosion in the corridor just outside the Dome area. Chu and Ramirez are down."

Young was standing from his desk before he even realised, shoving away the laptop he had spent the morning with, drawing the radio towards him. Barnes’ voice was urgent, tense. The radio crackled slightly before Young heard TJ respond.

"On my way." TJ's voice suggested she was already running. "Varro and Cole to the infirmary and scrub up. Emergency team with kino sled to the Dome corridor."

Young snatched up his radio as soon as he was sure he would not be interrupting anything that TJ required. He was just about to click the button to speak when Rush skidded into his doorway, hauling himself to a stop on the door frame, flushed from running.

"Rush."

"I'm on my way down, I've shut down airflow to that area. Get Brody and Eli to meet me down there and Chloe and Volker to monitor the power flows from the Core Room."

"Volker's on the bridge." Young yelled as Rush departed.

"Calvos then." Came the shouted response.

He spoke quickly into the radio. “This is Young, Brody, Eli, Rush needs you in the damaged area, he’s on his way there. Chloe and Calvos to the core interface room to monitor, I’ll see you there in a moment. Young out.”

He strode out of the room towards the communal areas. Camile was coming out of the mess hall.

"Who's on the bridge?" She asked.

"Scott, Volker and Dunning. Let's get to the core room. Chloe and Calvos will be monitoring." He said. He lifted the radio as they walked. "Barnes, this is Young. Sitrep. What happened?"

"We were taking down bulkheads." She responded. "Second corridor out from the dome, the one where only the sensors had over loaded and Rush wanted to replace them. We had the corridor mostly stripped and one of the pipes on the side blew out. Chu got the worst of the blast...he's gone sir. TJ's here now she’s working on moving Ramirez. She says to tell you she needs a surgeon from Homeworld Command..."

"I'll go." Camile said, turning away from him. "I've changed with several of the medical staff, they're familiar with my body."

"Isn't that a safe area?" Young asked into the radio as Camile ran for the stones room.

"It was." Rush's voice came through the radio harshly. "As far as we were aware there was only damage to the environmental sensors in this area, heat overloaded."

"What happened?" Young asked.

"When I know that," Rush snapped, "you'll be the first to know Colonel. Now stop distracting me. Rush out."

"Barnes, evacuate all non-injured personnel from the area, set up a security detail, no-one is to enter the area apart from Rush's team and TJ's team."

"Yes sir, Barnes out."

Young walked quickly towards the Core Interface Room. He could hear radio traffic between TJ, Camile on her way to the stones and Varro and Cole in the infirmary and stopped at Eli's quarters to grab spare kinos and controller. With a little fiddling with the controls he managed to send four in the direction of the dangerous area and kept walking to the Core Room.

Chloe and Calvos were at two consoles opposite each other.

He handed Chloe the Kino remote. "There's four on their way down there, use them to talk to Rush, keep the radios clear for emergencies." He ordered.

She nodded, transferring control of two of the kinos to her console. She held out the kino remote. "Could you...?"

He nodded before she had even finished, and handed the remote to Calvos. He watched as Calvos identified and connected his two kinos, but before Calvos had finished, Chloe was speaking.

"Dr Rush this is Chloe, can you hear me?"

He strode back over to Chloe's console looking over her shoulder as the kino arrived and she swung it round to get a better view of Rush.

"Yes Chloe, I can hear you." Rush said without turning.

Young could see him in the kino feed, examining a conduit with what appeared to be half a broken valve hanging off it. The valve had evidently blown out from the inside and half of it was not there anymore. The metal of the conduit was buckled outwards.

He watched as the science team started the work of identifying what had gone wrong, listened with half an ear to the radio as the doctor from Homeworld Command arrived and was directed down to the infirmary and he waited. There was nothing he could do now, nothing until the problem was identified and Ramirez either made it or did not. He had the best crew addressing the problem, had cleared the area of all extraneous personnel and posted a guard.

He tried not to pace. There was no job for him here now and he would simply be under foot in the Infirmary but at least here he could hear the conversations between Chloe and Rush and know that no-one else had been hurt.

Time passed. He waited, he went and got cups of tea for Chloe and Calvos, and he stood at a console and read off figures to Chloe. At least those he recognised automatically courtesy of the count down clock.

"Colonel this is TJ."

He knew immediately from the broken sound of her voice, even crackling through the radio that the news was not good.

"I'm sorry to say...we lost Ramirez."

He pulled his radio from his belt. "You did your best TJ, I'll be down there in a moment."

Chloe and Calvos said nothing, but they were both looking at him sympathetically. Young sighed, lips pressed together, eyebrows furrowed, then nodded slowly and turned to make his way to the infirmary.

xxxoooxxx

"Eli." Rush interrupted.

"It's my fault, I should have checked the valve!" Eli’s hands flailed in front of him as he talked.

"Eli!"

"I knew it was a bad idea, I…"

"ELI!" Rush shouted.

Eli stopped and stared at him. Rush took a moment to rein his anger in.

"It was a different valve." Rush said quietly. "You know it was. One that appeared fine, not close to the damaged areas. Not one we had even touched. It was just old." He pushed his fingers through his hair, suddenly extraordinarily tired. "Go, find Brody and Calvos and relax.” He ordered the younger man wearily. “Get drunk or something. Go. I'll finish the last bits here and Volker is on the bridge. Get lost."

Eli took a deep breath, then with a look of intense gratitude that made Rush deeply uncomfortable, he nodded. "Thanks." He said.

Rush nodded back and watched Eli walk slowly out. He went back to running his figures.

Rush looked up as the door opened. Young walked in to the core room. He had not had time to pay any attention to the radio chatter, but Rush could see from his expression that TJ had not been able to save Ramirez either. Young stopped in the doorway and his expression was raw.

"TJ lost him as well." Rush said pre-empting Young's pronouncement.

"Nothing she could do." Young said. "We got a surgeon from Homeworld Command but we just don't have the facilities."

"How is she?"

"I convinced her to get some rest." Young said, but his voice was rough and his eyes dark shadowed and Rush realised it must have gone far beyond that. "She's asleep now."

"How long did you have to stay with her?"

Young's eyes flickered in exhaustion and Rush guessed he was somewhere close to emotional collapse himself.

"Such a stupid fucking way to die." His eyes floated downwards as he spoke then he looked back to Rush. "You're on your own." He noticed.

Rush looked over the console. "I sent them to find their beds. The problem is fixed, at least temporarily. I already shut down power to the air systems in that corridor and Brody disconnected power from that entire section of the air system. It'll be running off the ventilation from surrounding areas, but won't be a problem for the moment. Well, not dangerous. We'll have to fix it though. We'll have to check the valves in the whole inhabited area, it was eroded on the inside, probably just wear."

He sat up from where he was hunched over the console, grabbing the back of his neck, pulling at his shoulder, rubbing the muscle with his fingers and grimacing.

"We could never have predicted it would happen." He said looking up at Young through his hair.

The expression on Young's face said he couldn't believe that yet and while Rush knew academically he was right, his body agreed with Young. His muscles were still tight, still angry with his failure. He should have known. He rubbed at his shoulder.

"Who's on the bridge?" He asked Young.

"James, Volker and Camile, though Volker is asleep in a chair. He volunteered to stay. Camile slept on Earth so she could take over when she got back."

“I should take over from Volker, he’s been there for ten hours.”

"And you’ve been doing this for the same amount of time.” Young contradicted him. “They'll wake him if they need him." Young said.

Rush closed his eyes and rubbed at his aching neck again, then flinched as Young’s hand wrapped round his shoulder. He looked up.

"Are you done here?"

Rush looked at Young, trying to read the other man's face.

"Yes," he replied eventually, "I'm done."

Young nodded, then turned and walked to the door and while he didn't look over his shoulder the implication was clear. Rush watched him leave, stared at the empty doorway for long moments. He took a few minutes to shut down what he was doing on the console. Reaching out he shut the laptop, locked the console and walked out.

By the time he reached Young's quarters, Young was in bed, brown eyes black in the half light. Rush shucked out of shirt, shoes and BDUs and slid into the bed in his t shirt and underpants.

There was no pretence of shyness. Rush could see Young's feelings were too raw, too painful for him to have the energy to engage in any subtle dancing round the topic, it was all need and the fragile balance of someone who has been strong for too long. As soon as Rush slid under the covers Young was reaching for him, grabbing his wrists, drawing him in and wrapping limbs round him like he was drowning. Bare legs tangled in his own and when Young's face pressed against his jaw and shoulder it was wet.

He had nothing left, all the energy was gone, adrenaline all run out just leaving tired trembling muscles and the bone weary cold exhaustion of a god awful day filled with failure and death. He slid into the heat of Young's skin, the warm space Young had already heated in the blankets and collapsed, limp and drained.

"You're cold." Young murmured.

"I'm tired." He mumbled into Young's t shirt.

"Yeah, of course."

Young stirred, thighs shifting, settling his legs closer along Rush's, rubbing a hand from elbow to shoulder and back, friction skipping palm over skin, warm burn of dry skin chafing over dry skin, and it was just a little too much, a little too intimate but he didn't have the energy to complain as the hand rubbed his shoulders, neck and down over his back to settle in the small of his back rubbing lazy circles through his t shirt.

A mounting unease built in him. It was not sufficient to make him move, but he could feel Young's body pressed against his, flush against him cheek to ankle and it did not feel like the innocent comfort against the cold, or the gentle circle of someone else's arms keeping the nightmares at bay. Young was not doing anything more than rubbing warmth into his chilled skin, but this was about touch, connection and emotion and Rush had no idea what territory they were moving into.

One of Young's hands was on his lower back, moving over fabric and as it circled the fabric shifted, not even deliberately, and Young's hand was moving over his bare skin. Could he even go to sleep like this? And did he even want to, laying here with the warmth leeching from Young's bare skin into his? There was a certain fear to the concept.

"You're thinking too hard." Said Young quietly. Rush's own phrase, and true enough, though he had no idea how it meshed with Young's thoughts, or what Young was suggesting by it.

Young shifted slightly and they settled against each other completely, not just flush against each other, but weight resting into each other. Rush was reassured to realise that at least so far Young's touch appeared to be completely innocent, and tangled together like this there was no way he could miss it.

"What're you thinking?" He asked finally, very quietly.

Young seemed surprised, a slight tension of muscles, a press of stubbled cheek into his. There was a pause.

"That it's been a terrible day." Young said, speaking quietly and almost directly into Rush's ear. Once he had started the floodgates appeared to open. "That I spent the last four hours in hell, briefing Homeworld Command and writing to two families. That it took an hour of that to wind TJ down from the mess she was in, sitting in the cold on the edge of her bed, watching her cry her heart out. Stripping their damn corpses 'cause we can't afford to waste a damn stitch of anything and I'm damned if I'll make anyone else do that. That this was all a fucking accident. That this is all my responsibility. That I can't do today anymore. That it would be so easy to crawl into a bottle. That this, here with you, this is as addictive as the fucking bottle is and equally as likely to come back and bite me on the ass."

It wasn't Young's fault. It was his. The ship was his responsibility. The crew was Young's, the ship was his.

"It wasn't your fault." Rush said. "You aren't responsible for the state of the ship."

"And you are?"

"Yes, and for us being here in the first place. All of this is my fault. Everyone that dies here is my fault, not yours."

Young was silent again. "You really think that?" He asked Rush after a few seconds.

"I know it."

There was an absolute certainty in Rush, and it obviously came through in his voice as Young pulled his head back, separating them just a little down to their chests, t-shirts bunching between them, looking into his face. Young's gaze went on just a little too long, and Rush realised that maybe Young agreed with him, had always agreed. Certainly he had accused him of it enough times.

"What are you thinking?" Rush asked again.

Young answered his question with a question. "How hot did we come in when we arrived here originally?"

"Surely you're aware of that yourself."

"Tell me."

"Fast, much faster than a normal gate trip. The power levels were spiking much higher even to start with, and there was a whole planet's worth of naquadria discharging at the same time, the power levels were astronomical. You came in fastest last, with the final discharge of the planet exploding no doubt and probably the explosion behind you."

"But the journey, the distance here, took most of the power that was propelling us like that through the gate."

"Yes, of course, we're trillions of light years away, that takes power. Where are you going with this?" Rush asked with some suspicion.

"Nowhere." Young said, his voice quiet but sounding certain and final. "I'm going nowhere. Do you want to sleep?"

The sudden change of topic threw Rush, but he was tired and confused, which was unfamiliar and unwelcome and Young was right that this was addictive, kept him coming back to hide himself in the bed of a man who he had shared an uncertain relationship with at best, homicidal at it's worst.

"Well, yes, go ahead."

Another long pause. Young was looking at him, concern evident on his face. Rush stared back at him, he did not want sympathy from anyone, he did not need it. He did not deserve it, least of all from this man and there was no censure in that gaze.

Young was still staring at him, still concerned, Rush could feel the other man's fingers rubbing into the tense muscles of his shoulders, trying to gentle him, calm him. Rush tried to relax the tense muscles of his face, hoped Young would give up. Young closed his eyes, and paused, Rush could see him thinking but could not read his expression.

Young took a breath and opened his eyes again staring straight into Rush's eyes. His face held nothing but concern and a slightly wistful look. Rush frowned, not understanding the play of expressions in front of him. Young pressed forwards gently and brushed his lips over Rush's.

"Then go to sleep Rush." He murmured, so close Rush could feel Young's lips brush his again as he spoke, warm breath drifting over his jaw. "It's not all your fault."

Another soft brush of lips, and Young was settling back into him, cheek to cheek, arms wrapped round him, a foot tucking behind Rush's ankle to lock him against him.

Christ.

A hand was rubbing up and down his spine, Young settling.

"Go to sleep Rush. "Young repeated into his neck. "It's late, we're both exhausted."

Surely Young didn't expect him to go to sleep after that.

"Young."

"What?"

"Why?"

"Because I wanted to."

"Just like that?"

"Just like that. Just take it for what it was Rush, we'll talk about it in the morning."

Rush had no idea what it was, but he was exhausted, and Young was on the verge of collapse and unlikely to engage in further emotional discussion. Rush let exhaustion carry him down.


	27. Snapped

The radio woke them. Rush started violently. The message repeated.

"Rush? This is Brody, come in." A pause. "Doctor Rush?"

Young woke as he did, loosening arms tightened around Rush to let him roll over and grab the radio on the side, sitting up as he did so.

"What is it Brody?" Rush’s voice was sleepy, accent bleeding through.

"We've found another eroded valve in the inhabited area."

"Shite."

Young watched him snap to alertness instantly.

"Lieutenant Scott has got a couple of the marines keeping people out of the area, but we need to fix the problem."

"Agreed, where are you?" Rush was already leaning over the edge of the bed, feeling for his clothes as he spoke.

"Near Scott's quarters, junction with the food store corridor."

"Fine, go ahead with establishing the extent of the problem, I'll be there. Rush out."

He put the radio down on the counter with a click, pulling his second t-shirt over his head. "I have to go." He told Young.

Young looked up at him nodding. "Go fix it."

Rush swung his legs round, wincing as bare feet hit the cold floor and reaching for the rest of his clothes. Young reached for his own.

"What time is it?" he asked over his shoulder.

Young paused his dressing to check Rush's mobile. "Half ten. We didn't set an alarm."

"Shite."

Young stood and pulled on his pants. "I'll check the coast is clear for you."

Rush grabbed his mobile and shoved it in his pocket.

Young opened the door, looked out and nodded."You're good."

Rush slid out and strode off towards the rest of the science team.

xxxoooxxx

Young sat at his desk staring at the laptop screen. In theory he was reviewing the shift rotas for the bridge, hydroponics, armoury and other key areas, filling the gaps left by Ramirez and Chu's deaths. In practice his mind was racing over the same thought over and over again. He had kissed Rush. He had kissed Rush and then fallen asleep without a further thought.

Until the morning.

And then Rush had been called away. Young was not sure if this was good or bad. The conversation was going to be extremely awkward, but leaving it longer could either give perspective or make the situation worse. He suspected it would be the latter.

But it had seemed so natural.

He had suddenly seen his own self recrimination mirrored in the other man, and he knew how that felt, knew how it ate at you and he did not want anyone to feel like that, particularly him. Young had cared that he felt like that. He had desperately wanted to say something to make Rush understand that. But for all the time they had spent together over the preceding months, the things they had told each other, he had no words that could make Rush believe anything he said to that effect.

So he had kissed him. Impulsively, but meaning what he was trying to express.

Damn the man, he just kept getting under Young's skin. Damn everything that kept them drifting back into each other's orbits. With time and perspective and a deal of difficult introspection that he had not really enjoyed Young could recognise the absences in both of their lives that had led to them opening up to each other in the first place. But he just kept going back and he knew he would do it again.

He could feel it clear in his memory, Rush's lips dry and soft under his, the slight scratch of beard, the surprised look on Rush's face as he pulled back a little.

"Everett!"

A voice cut through his reverie and his brain supplied the belated realisation that TJ had said "Colonel" several times already.

"Are you okay?" she asked.

She was standing in the open doorway watching him with some concern.

"You were miles away." She added. "Thinking about yesterday?"

"Yes…no…"

Young's mind wanted to shrug helplessly. What was he to say?

_Last night I kissed a man I tried to kill a couple of years ago._

_Last night I kissed Rush, and he let me._

She watched him turn the thoughts over in his brain.

_Last night I kissed Rush, and I think given a similar situation I'd do it again._

_Last night I kissed Rush and I liked it._

And damn but that was the heart of the problem. "Kind of." He said eventually.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

He stared at her, frozen in indecision. She looked at his face, then stepped in and hit the door control, closing the door. He did not move, leaning on his elbows in front of the laptop as she walked over. She sat on the edge of the desk looking down at him and he sat back.

"I'm assuming it isn't the accident." She said. "You'd have said something. Did you fight with Rush?"

"No." Young said, slightly more abruptly than he had intended.

"But it's about him." TJ said.

Young was silent but TJ pressed on.

"I know I'm your ex…"

Young winced.

"…but I'm also the only person who knows about your relationship with Rush."

"It's not a relationship." Young said automatically.

TJ regarded him, face impassive.

"Can you really say that?" She asked pointedly. "You're sleeping together," she caught his expression and rephrased, "okay, sleeping in the same bed on at least an occasional basis, and when I walked in on you that time you were curled up asleep practically in his lap. _And_ he defended you."

Young looked away, down at the laptop screen again.

"I'm not saying you're in love with him, but you can't tell me there isn't some kind of relationship there. I'm not blind Everett."

He had forgotten how hard it was to lie to TJ. Apart from the guilt he felt, she was virtually always able to tell when he was lying. He took a deep breath in and let it out slowly. She was watching him, face sympathetic, waiting for him to tell her. His _ex_ , and that thought was painful too. Honesty, it was not always the best policy, but suddenly he was tired of lying.

"I kissed him last night."

TJ smiled. Smiled! A little sadly maybe, a little ruefully, but she was smiling at the thought of him kissing Rush.

"It's not funny." He muttered.

"Everett, I have never met anyone with a bigger case of relationship denial than you." She said gently. "How long were we "not having a relationship" hey?"

He winced again.

"I'm not going to ask how long you've been "not having a relationship" with Rush, it's none of my business." She continued.

He scowled. "It was the first time I...either of us did anything like that."

"What kind of a kiss?" she asked.

"The usual, on the lips."

TJ gave him a look that suggested he was socially inept. He had seen her use it on Eli, James and Greer at various points in time, recognised exactly what it was.

"Okay. Let me phrase this another way, did you kiss him with the intention of taking it any further."

"No."

"Tongues?"

"No!"

He scowled at her slightly wicked look and received the social ineptitude look again. Young huffed out a breath and leaned forward again, resting on his elbows and looking up at her sideways. Why was he discussing this with her?

"No." he repeated. "I kissed him and then we went to sleep."

She tilted her head and looked at him. "And did either of you freak out?"

"No, he seemed a bit startled, but no, we went to sleep, he fell asleep before I did." He responded.

"Then why are you worried today?"

He looked at her helplessly. Why did she have so much more of a clue than him?

She shrugged. "Would you do it again?"

He looked away before responding. "In the same circumstances, yeah," he said quietly, "I think I would."

"Why did you kiss him?"

He looked up at the question, unsure if it was a question he really wanted to answer. Well, he had come this far…

"It seemed like the right thing to do at the time. He was unhappy, blaming himself for everything that happened yesterday. I didn't know what to say to let him know I actually gave a crap. It seemed to…be the right message."

TJ smiled at him again.

"You want my advice Everett?" she asked and moved on without waiting for a response. "Wait for the right moment and try it again."

He stared at the laptop screen again. "I'm sorry TJ."

She reached out and put a hand on his shoulder with a slightly troubled expression. "Don't take this the wrong way Everett," she said, "but I'm kinda relieved."

He looked up at her in surprise.

"We were failing at every turn," she said, "too much pain, too many things gone wrong, bad decisions. I can't do us. I can't do a relationship. I miss you, but I don't miss the feeling I'm getting it wrong every time and it's only going to get worse."

She stood, bent down and gave him a gentle kiss on the cheek.

"We would have been having this conversation even if you weren't seeing Rush."

"I'm not…"

"…Seeing Rush. I know." She laughed at him. "I can always use a friend though."

He smiled at her sadly.

"I'd better get back to the infirmary." She said quietly. “I’ve got things to finish writing up.”

"What did you come for?" He asked her.

"Just to see how you were after yesterday."

"Not good but I'll survive." His brow furrowed as he spoke.

"I know." She reached out and squeezed his shoulder. "You'll be okay"

She left, closing the door again after her.

This time he knew he was crying and he knew why, however un-masculine it was. They had not been together for a long while, and she was right about them failing, but he cared about her, still loved her if he was truthful with himself, and with the closure of that door it still felt like she was leaving him. He let himself go for a little while before pulling himself together and splashing his face with water.

xxxoooxxx

Rush tried to focus on the work. It was important but he was struggling. Even Eli seemed to realise something was wrong with him as he kept shooting him sideways glances. He forced himself to concentrate as they refitted the power to the section of corridor. This damaged section wasn't damaged to the extent of the section that had killed Chu and Ramirez and was consequently replaceable now, before it killed anyone. They worked through till lunchtime when he called a halt, needing a moment of quiet, even if he wasn't actually hungry.

Young had looked at him, had looked at him like...and kissed him, Young had kissed him damn him.

"Are you okay, man?" Eli asked him in a low voice.

They were walking about a dozen paces behind Brody and Volker.

"You look, you know, kind of bothered." Eli persisted.

"Thank you Eli," his voice was surprisingly steady, "unsurprisingly two people being killed yesterday does have some sort of effect."

Yes, it makes me fall to pieces and let Young…

"Uh, sorry.  I guess…yeah."

"Quite." Rush scowled.

Damn Eli, damn Young, damn it all.

He ate the food as fast as possible, not even noticing what it was. He got about half way through before his stomach started to churn. He turned to Brody.

"You can finish without me."

"Yeah, sure." Brody was giving him a look that screamed concern.

"Good."

He got up and walked out of the mess hall, shoulders tight, hands clenching and releasing. People got out of his way. Rush barely noticed.

He walked straight to Young's room, the door was closed but he hit the switch and walked straight in, closing it behind him.

xxxoooxxx

Young looked up as Rush stormed in, at his desk on the laptop still trying to finish the rotas. He stared up at Rush.

"Why?" Rush demanded. "Why did you…?"

Young blinked at him, furrowing his brow, taking a second to catch up with the question. "Because you were beating yourself up about something that wasn't your fault, and so was I, and I didn't know what to say. Because strangely enough Rush, I actually give a shit." Young's voice sounded slightly hoarse to Young himself.

Rush was shaking, Young could not work out whether he was furious or terrified. Probably furious.

"Damn you," Rush snapped, "you bastard!"

Young had no idea what was going on in Rush's head. He stood and took a step towards Rush.

"You…!" Rush seemed to lose the words he needed. "You can't…!"

"I can't what? Talk to me Rush, make me understand. I _want_ to understand."

Young caught the fist as it came towards him. There was not a great deal of power behind it anyway. He used the momentum to pull the angry man into him, pushing Rush's fist down to hold it at his side and wrapping his arm round him pinning Rush's left arm to his body and Rush to Young. Rush fought and struggled.

"Rush! Stop it!" Young did not raise his voice.

"You bastard!"

"What is wrong?" Young demanded into Rush's ear.

"Why?!"

"I told you."

Young was struggling to understand Rush's reaction, the other man was still fighting and struggling. Young shoved, walking him backwards into the wall, using his weight to pin the smaller man.

"I should never have let you close." Rush snarled. "Don't touch me!"

"Good moment." Muttered Young sardonically. Rush struggled to free himself. "Nick!" he shouted the man's name directly into his face.

Momentarily Rush stopped and Young leaned in and kissed him again, not tentatively this time, a firm dry press of lips. Rush froze, then softened. Young kissed him again, slower and more gently, chaste and soft, then pulled back.

"Nick." He said gently, looking into his face in concern. His ability to read Rush's body language was failing him dramatically.

Rush was staring at him with a pained expression. With a final burst of strength, Rush shoved him away and stormed out of the room. Young stood there, staring at the door. That could have gone a lot better.

xxxoooxxx

Rush did not run, absolutely did not run from Young. He did set a good pace though, leaving the inhabited area far behind, shoes thudding on the decking in the corridor. He walked for the sake of walking, for the sake of not being still, to get away from both Young and himself, but it did not work. He absolutely could not accept this, could not accept someone this close, could not accept allowing himself to actually care about...to care that...

He stopped, rubbing at his face, grabbing a handful of hair and pressing into his scalp, taut with anger and an intensity of emotion that threatened to overwhelm him.

This was not...could not be...not again.

He spun and slammed his fist into a bulkhead, feeling something give way excruciatingly. The pain rocketed through his hand and he clasped it to his chest, gripping his wrist tight with his other hand, but the pain gave him both focus and distance from his thoughts and he held the sensation of pain to himself, blocking out everything else that threatened to overwhelm him.

He found some quarters with a large window and sat on the bed, nursing his hand and staring blankly out of the window at the FTL light.


	28. Doped up

TJ was in the infirmary when Rush walked in. It was mid evening, blessedly quiet after the nightmare of the previous day and she was reading. She saw him hovering near the doorway and stood.

"What's wrong?"

He held out a hand, swollen with a frankly hideous dark bruise blooming across the back of his hand. She frowned at him.

"What did you do?" she asked him.

"Hit my hand on a wall." He said sourly.

She was looking into his face and he knew it must be twisted a little in pain, his hand throbbed and his self control was insufficient to keep it impassive.

"When will any of you learn that in a fist versus a wall contest the wall always wins?"

"I didn't…"

"Ah!" she cut him off.

He went to explain further but she forestalled him with a raised hand.

"Don't try and deny it." She said with irritation. "Come over here. Now, do you want to explain why you've taken at least a couple of hours to bring that hand to me?"

"No." he said shortly.

She pressed him down on a gurney with a hand on each shoulder and took his wrist gently, looking at his hand. She had him try and grip her hand, then started to bend his fingers carefully and he tensed at the excruciating pain. Despite him gritting his teeth and clenching his other hand, there were tears squeezing from his eyes as she manipulated his hand.

"You haven't completely broken it, though I think, and my opinion is the best you're going to get without an X-ray I don't have, that you've fractured your fourth metacarpal. That one." She pointed at the bone running up to the knuckle of his ring finger. "Wait here. Don't even think about leaving."

She was gone for several minutes before she came back with a bowl of ice, which he realised must be from the freezer room. He watched her put some in a plastic bag and wrap it in a towel.

"This will hurt, but we need to get the swelling down." She said, more gently. She put the ice pack on the back of his hand. "Leave that in place."

The order sounded completely non-negotiable. It did hurt, quite a lot, although not as much as when she had been moving his fingers around.

"Okay, there's not much that I can do except ice it to get the swelling down and splint it. Though I can clean up your knuckles."

She used some alcohol on his knuckles which, a small mercy, actually hurt less than the rest of his hand. He sat with the ice on his hand for what seemed like hours. She came back intermittently to check on his progress, but appeared to be working with something at her desk which looked like hard work. He could not see entirely what it was.

"Fine." She said. "As good as it's going to get."

She came over with three pieces of metal on a tray and a steaming cup.

"What's that." He asked suspiciously.

Two were longer and had a significant curve at one end. The other was short and straight.

"Your splints." She said. "I have no proper splints Doctor, and nothing to cast your hand with. This is it. This," she gestured at the cup, "is your painkiller. Drink it."

He took the cup with his uninjured left hand and sniffed it. It smelled acrid and herbal and was yellow, not the green tea he had been given previously.

"Drink it." She repeated.

He drank it.

"Why didn't you give it to me earlier?"

"Because it's going to make you really dopey in a while and I don't want to have to carry you to your bed or have you in here."

"You could have told me." He snapped.

"You wouldn't have drunk it. Now at least you'll get some sleep."

She rested his hand on a pillow across his lap and started to tape it up, running some tape over his hand and wrist before starting to tape the splints in place, the two long ones holding his wrist and hand straight, the curve curling his fingers down, tape binding his fingers between them. The short straight one went across the other two over his knuckles acting as a spacer and stopping the other two sliding in.

"This stays on." She instructed him. "It comes off when I say and not before. You will not use this hand for anything until I say you do."

He scowled at her. "Just hold on, I am not some child!"

"Then stop acting like one." She snapped. He scowled and went to move but she grabbed his upper arm. "No, you don't get to go yet. Now I'm assuming this is because you've argued with Everett."

Rush went to pull away, giving her an aggressively unfriendly look. She did not seem cowed by this.

"No." she said more forcefully, taking a firm grip on his shirt. "I don't get involved in other people's relationships, until it starts to impact on my job as your medical practitioner, particularly if you end up in here, and this completely comes into that scenario."

"I am not in a relationship with Young." Rush growled.

She gave him a long look, not releasing his arm. He weighed the idea of yanking away and walking out, but he suspected she would prevent him until she had said her piece and he was beginning to feel a little giddy.

"And I'm obviously not the person who walked in on you two curled up in bed together?" She asked pointedly.

"It's none of your damn business."

"You made it my business when it resulted in this idiocy." She gestured with her free hand to his splint. "In fact you made it everyone's business as you are now one handed, using your off hand for everything."

He went to slide off the gurney, but her hand on his shoulder prevented him moving. He gave her a flat glare.

"Let me go."

"Not until you've heard me out." She snapped.

He froze and stared at her.

"You need to talk to him and sort out whatever it is that made you do this." She said. "This…" a gesture at his hand, "is impacting on your effectiveness as a member of the crew. Whatever you two had before you got to the place that caused this seemed to be improving it. Fix it."

He gave her the flat glare again.

"You don't have much choice." She said. "Let me put it this way. Firstly you're walking round with a splinted hand. He is not stupid, foolish at times, thoughtless occasionally, but not stupid. You also have until tomorrow morning to talk to him before I pass the accident report writing up the treatment to your hand to the officer in command. Him."

"You won't."

"I do for every single injury or emergency treatment that I undertake, it's standard procedure." She let him go. "I'll see you tomorrow afternoon to check it's not swollen up again."

He looked at her darkly for a moment then slid off the gurney. The drugs, herbs, whatever she had given him, was beginning to kick in and the pain was receding but he was feeling really out of it, and sleepy. He stared at her while he gathered the momentum to leave.

Impulsively she stepped forward and gave him a brief hug. He stiffened, then relaxed a little, it was hard to stay tense with the brew she had poured into him. She let go and squeezed his shoulder.

"What was that for?" he tried to snap, but it came out as a slightly weary question. "Not very professional."

She smiled.

"I thought you needed it. My medical opinion."

He stepped back. "When does your report land on his desk?"

"Tomorrow morning, though I can make it later in the morning. It won't say how you did it, but I suspect he'll put two and two together." She stepped back and regarded him. "Shoo. Go to bed, before you pass out in my infirmary and I have to get someone to take you there. Come back tomorrow for a check up or I'll come find you."

Rush left.

xxxoooxxx

Rush was feeling really woozy as he left the infirmary. His initial intention had been to get some treatment for his hand and to disappear again, but that was looking to be less of a potential option now that Lieutenant Johansen had drugged him. Probably her damn intention. At least his hand had stopped hurting. He made his slow and rather unsteady way to his quarters. Half way there, the room started to spin a little and he stopped to lean his shoulder against a wall for a moment. Maybe he should have mentioned to Lieutenant Johansen he had not eaten anything since he had had half a bowl of something at lunchtime.

There were footsteps behind him. He turned, rolling his shoulder blades back against the wall.

Young was looking at him, his gaze dropping to Rush's splinted hand.

"You are an idiot," Young said.

"TJ grassed me up." Rush said in tired irritation.

"TJ said nothing about _that_." Young spat the word out. "I asked her if she'd seen you and she said she had and you were just on your way to your quarters. Now what the hell is this."

He gestured at the splint.

"I hit ma hand on a wall." Rush said. He folded at the knees and slid down the wall.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" Young demanded.

"Was Lieutenant Johansen's evil yellow jollop."

"Want to run that by me again in English?"

"She drugged me."

Young looked at Rush. "Yeah." He drawled. There was a significant amount of disbelief in his voice

"She gave me some stuff for the pain." Rush muttered.

Young looked down at him, then pulled out his radio.

"TJ, this is Young, can you come to the corridor past Chloe's quarters to check on your patient?"

Young squatted down next to him. Rush rubbed his face and scratched at his beard slightly clumsily with his left hand. It was itching. He focussed on Young with some effort.

"Well at least you don't have to worry about not being able to shave." Young told him facetiously.

Rush looked up at him and scowled. "Think Ah've had just about as much of you as I can take." He muttered slightly drunkenly, struggling to keep the slurring out of his voice.

Young snorted.

Footsteps on the decking echoed down the empty corridor and TJ walked up, squatting next to Young.

"Wow." She said.

"You drugged me." Rush accused her.

"I wasn't expecting it to work this fast." She said to Young. "He should have been in bed by the time it kicked in."

"What is it?" Young asked.

"Strong dose of spiky yellow leaf painkiller tea."

"What's he done?"

Rush gave a slightly fuzzy growl irritated that TJ was telling Young everything, but TJ answered Young anyway.

"Fractured fourth metacarpal. Broken his hand. He'll need the painkiller if he's going to get any sleep tonight." She turned back to Rush. "Did you eat dinner?"

He did not answer, just scowled. She shook her head and turned to Young.

"He'll be fine, just take him off to bed. He's going to act pretty stoned until he goes to sleep, but he'll be fine. You need a hand getting him there?"

Young looked at Rush.

"Yeah, just to the door."

He moved around to Rush's good side, Rush tried to track him with his eyes, failing as Young moved out of his field of vision. As TJ counted, they lifted on three. Rush came up unsteadily between them, the corridor swimming a little as he was lifted upwards too fast to focus.

"Bastards." He told them, trying for anger and failing.

"You mind your language, Doctor," TJ told him, "That's Lieutenant Bastard to you."

Young just laughed at him.

"Fucking..." Rush started, and gave up at a look from TJ.

He swayed between them. Young put Rush's good arm over his shoulders and TJ took the elbow of his bad arm and grabbed hold of the back of his pants. He gave a last desultory attempt to twist free but gave up as they gave a shove to get him moving and walked him to his quarters.

xxxoooxxx

Young could see Rush was pretty out of it, and even more so by the time they arrived at Rush's quarters, by which point the smaller man was almost totally reliant on Young and TJ to hold him up. He reached out, letting TJ take most of Rush's weight for a moment, and hit the door release.

"I suggest you stay with him." TJ said seriously. "My medical opinion. You have stuff to sort out, although in the morning when he's sober." She helped him get Rush over to the bed, and sit him down on the edge. "I'll have a word with the bridge crew, and tell them I've taken you off duty tonight, Scott's on anyway. No-one will bother him."

"You don't need to..."

"You need a good night's sleep, and to make sure this doesn't happen again." She countered walking to the door.

"I'm not sure that's not abuse of your position." Young said.

"I am responsible for the health and wellbeing of the crew," she replied firmly. "That includes you two."

"Stop talkin' about me like I'm not here." Rush said from the bed, trying to roll over.

"Shut up." Young said looking down at him.

TJ gave him a warning look. "Deal with it." She said seriously. She looked down at Rush. "I'll see you tomorrow to check your hand."

She walked out.

"Let's get you in bed." Young said resignedly. "Then maybe you can explain why you tried to hit me then went off and punched a wall."

"Di'n't say I punched a wall and nor did she." Rush corrected him. "Anyway, you know what you did." He kicked off his shoes, sending them tumbling across the floor.

Young sighed and pushed Rush backwards carefully, so he was forced to lay back on the bed, then he undid Rush's pants and taking hold of them at the ankles, pulled them off. There was a note of protest from Rush.

"You can't sleep in your jeans." He told Rush.

"Doesn't mean I want you strippin' me."

"I'm not stripping you, and if you think you could stand up and get them off stoned and one handed then be my guest."

He pulled off Rush's socks, dropping them on the discarded pants then stood, looking down at him. Rush blinked at him, God the man really was stoned. He sat down next to Rush and grabbing him under the arms hauled him up the bed.

"'S that really necessary?" Rush grumbled.

"Can you even sit up?"

"O' course."

Rush sat up. Just. Young pulled the covers out from under him, and pushed them over him, settling himself down on top of the covers next to Rush. Rush gave him an odd look, and slipped down, laying back and sliding under the covers. Young slid off his shoes and lay down next to him, rolling onto his side and propping himself up on his elbow to look at Rush.

"What happened?" He asked him.

Rush scowled.

"I broke my hand." He said with some concentration. "That's it."

Stoned Rush was not as successful at lying as Rush usually was. He had an evasive look about him, slightly shifty and the concentration face had really given the game away.

"That's it?"

"Yeah."

"Because I kissed you?"

Rush said nothing, but his whole expression closed down and he looked away, staring up at the ceiling.

"I'm sorry." Young said, looking away himself and not making eye contact. "I didn't mean to…I wanted you to know I cared how you felt and didn't blame you, I didn't know how to say it. I didn't realise you'd be offended…I didn't think…" he paused and stuttered around the words he wanted to say, "I mean, you're straight, most guys don't appreciate being kissed by another guy. Hell, I'm straight." Young shifted uncomfortably on the covers. "I'll back off okay, we can go back to sleeping on our own…"

"No."

The sleepy voice surprised him, woozy but vehement.

"Get in the bed."

Young looked at Rush's face.

"Want you in here." Said Rush. "Don't leave."

He was definitely drunkenly sleepy now.

"You're stoned." Young told him. "Anyway, I told TJ I would stay, I'm not leaving." He said gruffly.

"'S what they all say. 'M cold. Get in an' come here."

Young paused.

"Take ye damn trousers off and get under the covers." Rush's accent was thick.

"Are you sure?"

"'M cold an' 'm tired, m'hand aches an' I just want t' sleep."

"You're stoned on painkillers." Young said. "I'm not doing anything either of us will regret tomorrow."

"'S not the gay thing." Rush said.

Young watched as Rush struggled his hands, one good, one splinted, out from under the covers, and damn he was really wrecked.

"Look if I do it to you will y' just get into bed?"

And clumsily he rolled towards Young, grabbed him one handed round the back of the neck and pressed their lips together. It was badly aimed, a little damp, catching the side of Young's mouth and Rush managed to clash noses and press Young's lips into his teeth.

Young turned into the kiss, lips softening under Rush's, fingers tightening into his palms, trying not to give in to the impulse to take Rush by the shoulders. He could not help the way he sank into the kiss slightly though, and that in itself felt strange, for the five seconds Rush pressed his lips to Young's.

Rush rolled back drunkenly and Young stared at him.

"Okay." Young said uncertainly, unsure what to say. He rolled onto his back.

"Will ye come in now." Rush said, sounding tired.

Young unbuttoned his pants, lifted his hips and slid out of them, dropping them next to the bed on top of Rush's pants before sliding into the covers, facing Rush.

"What do you want Rush?" Young asked him directly, reaching out to place a hand on Rush's shoulder.

Rush didn't answer. Young looked at him, squeezed the hand holding Rush's shoulder and finally Rush spoke, voice fuzzy and thick.

"They dosed me straight up wi painkillers in the hospital and left me in A 'n' E, th'emergency room, for an hour and I was drifting in and out and there was a man yellin' and shoutin' near me. They didn' know who I was, the rest o' m' friends had legged it when the police an' ambulance turned up an I was too out of it to tell 'em."

There was a long pause. Young realised it was the end of the story of his scar Rush had started telling him months ago.

"In the end they gave up an took me in to operate on me anyways. I woke up in the ward, but they kept me dosed up an I didn' know where I was, kept comin' in an out of consciousness. It hurt all the time, where I'd been stabbed."

"Did your parents visit?" Young watched Rush, whose gaze was vague and unfocussed.

"Police in th'local station said to m' parents had to wait forty eight hours to report me missin' as I'd been reported missin' so many times before. Took two days for them to be told where I was. I was two days stoned out of m' head on morphine too doped up to say m' name, not knowin' where I was or what were going on. 'S almost forty years an' I still hate hospitals and bein' doped up."

Young expected Rush to close up, to put the blank mask back on, but Rush's face was miserable, the drug stealing his usual alertness and snap, and he seemed to be having trouble focussing on anything.

"I'm not going anywhere." Young assured him. "TJ's orders" He put an arm out, over Rush.

Rush rolled awkwardly in Young's arms, sliding back so Young was spooned around him, head resting on Young's arm. Young slid his other hand round Rush's waist, sliding it under Rush's shirt to lay over the old injury, scar cupped in the hollow of his palm. Rush shuddered briefly, then his muscles relaxed and he leaned back into Young.

"Seriously Nick, you never do anything by half measures do you?" He muttered. "Can we try the crazy mood swings a little slower next time? So I've got a bit better idea of what the hell's going on in your head?"

There was an answering mumble, nothing coherent. Young could feel Rush's cheek pressed into the skin of his inner arm, beard rough and scratchy as he shifted slightly before quite quickly he relaxed, muscles soft, dead weight in Young's arms.

Young wondered briefly why Rush never just asked for what he wanted. Still, it was interesting he seemed more inclined to share the story. Evidently recent events had brought it up in his mind again.

Young had understood the message though. He settled himself closely behind Rush, cradling him, tucking his face into the back of Rush's neck, moving till the long hair settled and did not tickle and let himself drift, arms wrapped round the other man.

This was simple, warm, comfortable, just the two of them, no conflicting demands, no decisions to make. Young relaxed and slept.


	29. A relationship

Rush woke, groggy and disoriented, like a bad hangover without the headache. He was in bed with Young again. He regarded the splinted hand on the pillow in front of him, he remembered that well enough. His hand throbbed evilly, no doubt what had woken him. He began putting his memories of the previous night in order, he hated being fucking doped up.

He had kissed Young, kissed him to shut him up and make him stay. He allowed himself a small smile for the completely shocked look on Young's face, then frowned. This was getting out of hand. He needed to back off, he needed to get some space from this. This was guaranteed to end badly, however much he had wanted Young not to leave. He had not wanted to be alone, doped up and disoriented the preceding night. He would have done better convincing TJ she needed to keep him in the infirmary, but then she would have had to have stayed with him, or Cole or Varro.

And Young was there, available and willing, needing and consistent. Caring. Even now he was pressed up against, him, hand on Rush's stomach, face in the back of Rush's neck, radiating warmth. Getting under Rush's skin. Their relationship had altered beyond all recognition, become this uncontainable thing that was rapidly spiralling out of Rush's control.

A relationship. For all he was avoiding the thought, he had to admit the inevitability of it all considering their actions in relation to each other. That was what it was.

Sometimes it seemed like the whole situation was the source of a constant low level of worry. Until he found himself falling asleep, wrapped up in the other man and it felt safe from the nightmares that haunted him. Until he was drowning in a drugged daze and Young promised to stay.

He shifted uncomfortably. Young made a slight grumbling noise without fully waking and burrowed his face further into the nape of Rush's neck, arm tightening around Rush's waist. Rush forced himself to relax.

The only other person who knew, TJ, seemed to think that this was a good thing, that whatever they had was improving their effectiveness. It was certainly true that he was getting more sleep and it was true that Young was on a more even keel with someone else keeping an eye on him, aware of Telford and stopping Young losing his rag with him.

Consciously he knew that it was a fear of getting involved with someone that had sparked his actions the day before, but he still could not help being angry, with himself that he had lost control and with Young for forcing the issue. Three kisses was all it had taken. A ghost sensation, the memory of lips on his, soft and dry, passed over him and his breath hitched a moment, before he let it all out in a sigh.

Young had also been right about this being addictive. He should walk out, make his apologies, tell Young to fuck off if need be, to leave him alone. This could not end well.

But he knew he would not, not yet at least. He found himself craving the contact, not in the daytimes when he was busy, but when he was alone in his bed, when he was cold and there was nothing between him and the thoughts and memories that recurred again and again. He would not give this up, not while the only warm thing in his life was a man he could not bring himself to hate anymore, no matter their previous actions.

He slumped a little in the bed. Young mumbled, arm shifting around his waist again, foot tucking between Rush's ankles.

Carefully he reached out left handed and picked up his mobile phone. It was half five in the morning. He shifted to ease the throbbing in his other hand and Young woke.

"Wuh?"

He felt Young's head lift from the pillow.

"What's the time?" Young asked blearily.

"It's half five." Rush said and pulled himself a little free, gingerly lifting his splinted hand away from the pillow.

Young's head fell back to the pillow. He felt Young pull himself away carefully from behind him and lifting his hand above his head out of the way of his movement, rolled to face Young.

"You okay?" Young asked him, leaning back a little to give his hand room.

"My hand hurts." Rush said flatly, carefully putting it back down on the pillow in between them.

Young did not rise to the bait, just chuckled. "Yeah, it would." He looked into Rush's face, suddenly more serious. "I'm sorry Nick."

"What for?"

Young shifted. "You know." He said evasively, looking down.

Rush paused as Young lay there, looking uncomfortable. "I was stoned on painkillers last night, but I have a fair recollection of returning the favour." He offered finally.

They lay there awkwardly.

"I told TJ." Young said.

"I guessed."

Young blinked a couple of times.

"What did she say?" Rush asked.

"She laughed and told me to do it again."

Rush frowned slightly. Young tensed.

"Why?"

Young was silent for long moments before he spoke. "Because I said I thought it was the right thing to do, because it felt right at the time." He said very quietly. "I didn't know what to say to you, didn’t know how to…"

They fell silent again.

"Look," Rush said finally, "this…what we're doing…"

"Yeah?" Young said awkwardly.

"This relationship is difficult." Rush said.

"Relationship." Young said with a wry laugh.

"Yeah." Rush said.

Young laughed. "TJ accused me of being in denial about being in relationship."

"What else do you call this?" Rush asked sourly. "Don't get me wrong, I've no designs on your body, but this does seem to have developed into a mutually dependent situation."

"Mutually dependent." Young said wryly. "Nice way of putting it."

"Well how would you put it?" Rush demanded.

"We look out for each other, we sleep together, we even hang out occasionally. It's been going on for months." Young said. "Yeah, this is a relationship." He admitted ruefully.

Rush laughed.

"This is really fucked up." Young said.

"You're telling me." Rush replied. "We are not telling _anyone_."

"Not that I disagree, but what if they find out?"

"They'd better not." Rush growled.

Young grinned. Rush scowled.

"TJ told me she thought we were good for each other." Young said.

"She told me she thought whatever we had was improving our effectiveness." Rush told him.

Young laughed at him. "Yeah, she would tell you that."

Rush glared across the pillow at him. "She's probably right." He admitted.

Young reached out and brushed his fingers lightly across Rush's fingertips where they poked out of the makeshift cast. "Are you gonna be alright?"

"I don't have much choice do I? And it's my own fault."

"What are you going to tell the crew?"

"Well I'm not going to tell them I freaked out because Colonel Young kissed me am I?" Rush grimaced. He sighed. "I'll say I was tired and slipped and caught my hand at a bad angle on a bulkhead."

"Sounds plausible." Young said. "You usually need more sleep."

Rush scowled. "Well I won't be doing it again, sleep or no." He said somewhat irritatedly. “Whatever you do to me."

Young flushed and looked away.

"It wasn't that bad." Rush muttered. "I wouldn't keep beating yourself up about it. You've done worse."

Young sighed. "Yeah, just don't do it again?" He asked.

Rush was silent. Young looked over at him curiously, Rush shifted uncomfortably and his hand twinged, he squinted against the pain.

"You should see TJ for some more painkiller." Young reached out carefully and put his hand on Rush's shoulder.

"Yeah." Rush agreed. "Maybe."

His tone of voice evidently did not convince Young he was likely to comply.

"You don't have to have enough to knock you out." Young told him. "Just enough to function. Come on, lets get some breakfast, then you can get some more tea from TJ."

xxxoooxxx

Over the next few days Young saw little of Rush in the daytime, he was deep in the planning stages of fixing the dome with the team that would be undertaking the first repairs when they dropped out of FTL for the next layover of sufficient length. Young suspected he was also avoiding him to some extent.

At nights though, Rush was in his bed more often than not. He was largely silent and often Young could smell the slightly acrid herbal scent of TJ's tea as he moved close. Young allowed him to slip wordlessly into his bed and curl up by his side, facing away with his broken hand resting on a pillow.

His mind appeared to be playing tricks on him though and there were moments he felt he was seconds away from leaning forward and kissing the other man’s pained face before the painkiller tea kicked in.

Young did not act though or push him to speak, just quietly wrapping an arm round the other man and snuggling up behind him. Inevitably, dosed on painkiller Rush would drop quickly into unconsciousness and Young would drift off to sleep listening to the other man's soft breathing.

Some mornings Young woke to him still there, some mornings he was gone before Young woke, or the sound of the door was what woke Young.

xxxoooxxx

Young was in the armoury, discussing the ammunition situation with Scott when Destiny dropped out of FTL with a descending hum and the stomach churning "slip sideways". He made his apologies to his Lieutenant and left for the bridge.

Rush was there ahead of him, sitting in the command chair with his injured hand resting in his lap. Despite it being her bridge shift James was hovering by his side evidently ousted from the chair. Brody followed Young through the hatch and it slid shut behind them.

"Where are we?" He walked over to Rush who was scrolling through command menus awkwardly with his left hand.

James moved out of Young’s way, backing off to lean on the railing by the hatch.

"We dropped out just outside the system, we've slowed right inbetween a one of the gas giants and a large asteroid belt." Volker said. "There's nine solid planets or planet like bodies in this system and three gas giants. Lots of moons. None are habitable."

"Then why are we here?" Young queried.

"According to this," Rush said looking at a screen, "we are making directly for a large moon with a significant amount of meteorite damage orbiting a gas giant. Destiny is indicating a large crater."

Young frowned. "Why?"

Rush shrugged. "Give me a moment, why don't you. Eli, run a scan of the crater."

"Are there any gates in range?" He asked Volker.

Volker shook his head. "None. Which is really odd."

Young looked back to Rush. "So why are we here?"

"What are the planets like?" Rush asked Volker.

"Three gas giants, two small hot ones close to the sun, seven ice balls. Nothing we could survive on."

"Mining." Eli piped up from the other console. "You remember we needed the palladium hydrochloride for the stasis pod? There's quite a bit here."

"Uh huh." Young agreed.

"I bet Destiny uses a lot of platinum group metals like platinum and palladium in components." Eli said excitedly. "We do on Earth as well."

Young waited patiently for the science team to elaborate.

"Yes!" Volker said, sounding like he had had an epiphany. "They're a lot more common where there are meteorite strikes. And that moon is covered in craters."

"The Apollo mission samples from the moon had them in." Eli piped up.

Volker nodded. Young looked at Rush.

"It would make sense." Rush said, pulling up a further window on the control panel. "Eli's right, sensors are indicating the right sort of rocks in the crater Destiny is highlighting. I've yet to get a full grip on the manufactory, but it's clear Destiny expects us to do repairs, no doubt she's expecting to get the materials necessary."

"Yeah." Brody said from the railing. "There's a lot of applications of the platinum group metals in catalytic processes, electronics, neutron detectors, x rays, many more. It's pretty much a given Destiny is going to be needing them if you think about it." He offered.

"How are we going to mine on a moon with no atmosphere?" Young asked.

"I'm sure we can find a way Colonel," Rush said easily, "there's always the space suits."

Young sighed at the edge of sarcasm and leaned against the railing to wait for the promised way to be found. At least with his hand in a cast Rush would not be participating.

xxxoooxxx

The seedship had detached from Destiny and directed itself towards an asteroid belt just beyond the planet the moon was orbiting. As soon as full scans of the moon had been completed, Destiny herself made for the sun to refuel although she was still half full. The refuelling was straightforward and he rode it out in the mess with Camile, discussing the unusual situation Destiny had initiated this time they had stopped. By the time the discussion was completed Destiny had returned to her previous position in a geosynchronous orbit around the moon and Young was back on the bridge.

The bridge crew had watched on the sensors as the seedship had taken ten shots with it's main weapon at an asteroid the size of a small house, floating at the edge of the asteroid field. The first shots had clipped the edge of the asteroid, spinning it out into free space. After a brief pause, the third to tenth shots had shattered it. The seed ship had then apparently simply scooped the debris up. Young thought even Rush had been impressed, it was hard to tell, though he had been apparently watching the screen as avidly as the others.

"Hey, asteroid pool game!" Eli had enthused. "There must be some sort of robots in there like the maintenance robots to move the rock around." He mused.

"If there are." Brody said. "We didn't find them yet."

The manoeuvre had been repeated four times, on four more asteroids, before the seedship backed off into open space and Rush reported the manufactory diagnostic had indicated it was refining.

With that underway, Young had given instructions for the preparations for work on the dome to commence and left to inform the rest of the crew that despite them dropping out of FTL they were not anywhere near a planet.

"Colonel Young, this is Rush."

Young pulled out his radio. "Rush, this is Young."

"If you could come to the Core Room, Mr Brody and I would like to discuss his Dome repair plan with you."

xxxoooxxx

Rush and Brody's plan was similar to what had been suggested before, but with more crew involved now there would be no planetary exploration happening at the same time. Young was happy to approve it.

"I'll have to go back to Homeworld Command and update them on the situation." He said. “No doubt Telford and Gutierrez will want to bring their team back to see what the seedship is doing."

Rush scowled.

"It'll be a lot quicker if you come back and brief them." Young said to him pointedly.

Rush did not even look up. "I'll be keeping an eye on the seedship's manufactory."

Young and Brody shared a look. In the scheme of Rush excuses that was a particularly poor example, Rush was not even trying for believable. Young gave up and changed the subject.

"Why hasn't Destiny got a manufactory?" He asked. "If all the seed ships have?"

Rush looked up from his laptop. "She has."

Young jerked. "And you didn't think to tell me?" He asked angrily.

Rush shrugged. "It's damaged beyond our current abilities to repair. It's not as complex as the one on the seedship, half of it is missing, apparently from an asteroid strike if I'm reading the data correctly, and the other half is open to space."

Young glared at him. "You should still have told me."

"We can't get there anyway." Rush said pushing his hair off his face. "It's in the engineering zone, past the second storage room we haven't accessed yet."

"And exactly when did you identify it?"

"After we docked with the seedship." Rush said, unapologetic and unrepentant. "I noticed an area of the seedship scan that almost exactly matched an area on the plan of Destiny. It's just larger on the seedship, no doubt to manage making stargates."

Young frowned. "And you didn't think that a simple action like telling me would be more likely to make that happen."

Rush's look was carefully blank.

"Look," Young said, "I'm going to go back to Earth and schedule a briefing, you just keep on with the agreed work."

"Yes Colonel."

Rush's voice was just this side of snide. Behind him Brody shook his head, Young ignored it and walked out.

 


	30. What is my problem?!

Young opened his eyes in Homeworld Command.

"It's Colonel Young." He said immediately. "I need to report to General O'Neill."

The airman nodded at him. "General O'Neill is in Colorado Springs, sir."

Young sighed. "Colonel Telford?"

"Colonel Telford is on leave."

Young's lip twitched irritated. "Okay. Take me to O'Neill's aide and I'll set up what I need with him."

He followed the airman out, passing the next member of staff to take his place in the seat at the stones device. With neither O'Neill nor Telford here, not that he wanted to see Telford, he would have to schedule a briefing later in the week and come back again.

The aide was as helpful as could be asked. The young man shuffled appointments and set up the briefing for a couple of days time, then left Young to access his email and other correspondence. Young typed a brief report to O'Neill, with a few bullets of the most recent arising issues on Destiny, then turned to his inbox. There were four emails from Emily. He left them till last, reading the most recent one first.

_"Everett, I have no idea why you are ignoring my messages, although I suppose I shouldn't be surprised by you failing to face up to things by now..."_

His face set in a scowl.

 _"...I need your decision on the finance issue..."_ He continued to scan through the message, _"...I'm guessing you're behaving like this is because someone has told you I'm seeing someone, well you don't have the right to judge me, you don't get an opinion on this...Just tell your solicitor what you want to do about the..."_

He sat back in his chair. Whilst he really ought to just make a decision about the money issue, at the moment he was not in any mood to make a rational decision about anything. What he really wanted to do was hit something - or someone - or have a drink. None of the above seemed like an option he could take. He could just imagine TJ's face if he turned up with a damaged hand like Rush. Rush himself would be insufferable at the hint of Young doing something foolish, though Young recognised it would likely only be in private these days.

He gritted his teeth and pushed away from the desk. He would be back in a couple of days anyway. He logged out of the computer, packed up his box of personal materials, handed it back to the aide and went back to the stones room.

Swapping back into his body on Destiny, he realised he was in the observation lounge, leaning on the rail staring out to space. When he turned round Rush was sitting at the counter, working one handed at a laptop, his broken hand resting next to it. Young stood and walked over to him.

He knew as soon as Rush looked up at him the other man had recognised it was him again.

"You're back." Rush said curiously. "That was fast."

"O'Neill and Telford were both unavailable." Young said, sitting down next to Rush. "I scheduled the briefing for two days."

Rush nodded.

"Will you attend it?" Young asked him.

Rush regarded him for a moment, then to Young’s surprise gave another brief nod.

"Look, I wanted to talk to you anyway."

"What about?" Rush asked, more typical suspicion washing over his face.

"I want Scott to teach Volker how to fly the shuttle."

"Volker?" Rush scoffed. "He's the last I'd pick."

"He's the last you'd pick for anything." Young countered. "He's the best choice of the science team though. Brody's an engineer, Eli's a better programmer, Calvos has a better grasp of the sensor systems now and you're currently incapacitated. Even if you weren't when you're doing repairs, he's the least essential to actually undertake something practical, but he'd still understand what you needed the pilot to do shifting parts or where to be to get sensor readings, and as an astrophysicist, he's the most likely of you to actually need to leave Destiny to undertake work in his own field."

Rush gave him an appraising look. "I can see you've thought about this."

Young rolled his eyes. "Yes Rush, I've thought about this." He said irritatedly.

"Fine." Rush said. "Be my guest, it'll keep him out of my way."

Young nodded. "I'm going to pair him up with Scott, act as co-pilot when they start shifting the dome panels. Your plan only had him manning sensors on the bridge anyway, and I can get Calvos to do that."

Rush nodded. "I can do that." He said. "I'll put Calvos in the core room to monitor, he's faster with his hands than me at the moment." He said lifting his splint with a self deprecating look."

"Fine, good." Young said. He slid off the stool. "I'd better go see Scott, we're setting up the next training sessions for the military personnel and I'll let him know about Volker."

Rush was still watching him. "What else happened?" He asked Young.

Young paused, then shrugged and spoke. "Email from Emily, pushing me about the finance issues, she finally admitted she's seeing someone, didn't say who."

Rush gave him a tight-lipped but slightly sympathetic look. He did not ask if Young was alright, but the question was in his eyes.

"I'm managing." Young said in response.

Rush gave him another considering look. Young expected Rush didn't believe him.

"I'll see you later then?" Rush said, with a slight emphasis on the later.

Young gave him a slight smile back. "Yeah." He agreed. "See you later."

xxxoooxxx

Volker was extremely pleased with Young’s plan. Young thought Brody and Eli were a little disappointed that they were not going to get a go though. Young was not averse to the others eventually being trained, but his next priority after Volker was Greer and TJ. Greer was already acting as a co-pilot, and, should he have to evacuate the ship again, TJ was the only person with a guaranteed place on that shuttle.

He spent a little time shuffling the rotas, wandering back to check a few things with Rush and setting up some training for two of the other crew to be able to take over some of Volker’s bridge shifts. Barnes was already on Rush’s list of crew he was interested in training so she was an easy choice, and Dawson, one of the civilians was gaining a good grasp of Ancient quickly so was another fairly straight forward choice. If only all of his decisions were that easy.

Lunch was soup, tasty enough if a little boring. Potato-ish with meat. Young was eating his way through it slowly when Rush came in with a face like thunder. He watched as Rush took his own bowl of soup and sat down opposite him angrily, almost spilling his soup.

“What’s up?” Young asked.

“We have a problem with the dome repairs.” Rush said, stirring his soup awkwardly with his left hand.

“What?” Young asked, putting his spoon down.

“Brody went out in the suit with Atienza to do the first removals of the warped metal.” Rush said. “Unfortunately, the warped metal goes down much further than we expected. It’s going to add about fourteen hours additional work to our plan cutting it away and repairing another six panels. I’m going to have to get additional panels from the manufactory on the seed ship.” Rush took a mouthful of soup carefully. “I’m also going to have to look at the surrounding area. It’s evidently not bad enough to have breached, we’d know, but we can’t rebuild on a warped base. I’m not sure what we’re going to have to shut down in order to remove the panel’s in question.”

Young frowned. “So, what now?”

“Brody and Atienza are going to go back out and take some more measurements and I’m going to update our plan based on their results and the areas around what we’re going to have to rip out now.”

Young nodded. “Fine. Let me know what you find out, and your changed plan. Will you need more personnel?”

“Not unless you can find me more spacesuits.” Rush muttered.

Young chuckled. “Sadly, no.”

They ate in silence for a moment, Young watching Rush’s slow progress with his spoon in his left hand.

“I’m thinking of planning an expedition to the other storage room while we’re stationary.”

Rush looked up in interest.

“Thought that would get your attention.” Young chuckled. “As you’re going to be needing most of your science staff, I’m thinking of sending Chloe and Barnes to help them get through doors.”

Rush scowled. “I note you’ve picked another time for an expedition when I’m incapacitated.”

“That nothing to do with the decision.” Young said, amused. “It just makes sense to do it, now and keep the crew busy, particularly as there’s no planets within range.”

Rush glowered, but nodded.

“You’ll be needed to monitor what they find by kino anyway.” Young added, receiving another nod in return.

He finished his soup. Rush was still only half way through his, but he stood.

“Let me know when you’ve rewritten your work plan.” He told the scientist.

“Fine.” Rush said. “I’ll see you later.”

xxxoooxxx

Young had managed to keep himself distracted most of the afternoon, involved in a training session for some of the civilians. He did not see Rush at dinner time. Eli mentioned that Rush was still working in the core room, and Young had Eli take some dinner to him, under no illusions about the likelihood of convincing the irascible scientist to leave what he was working on.

The evening was taken up with the latest offering from the entertainment committee, a showing of Casablanca, one of the few movies they had, and one which Young had not seen for over three months, so not too bad. It was not till he went to bed that his mind started turning over on the visit to Earth.

After an hour of lying there sleepless he gave up. Rush had said he would see him later, but no doubt the man was still working on the repair plan. Young looked at his watch, it was gone one in the morning. He pulled himself wearily out of bed, pulled some clothes on and went to find the other man.

He found Rush in the core room as he had expected, broken hand rested on the edge of the console, other tapping at the screen.

"You good?" Young asked him. He didn't look good, he looked exhausted.

"Tired."

Young walked up behind Rush and rested his arms on the other man's shoulders. Rush continued to tap at the console.

"It's almost two in the morning; you aren't going to fix it on your own tonight." He said conversationally, staring over Rush's shoulder at the unintelligible stream of Ancient scrolling on the screen. "It's late. Come to bed."

There was a small strangled noise from the doorway. Eli was standing there, barefooted, bed-headed and with a horrified expression on his face.

"How could you!" he said. He wasn't quite shouting but it was a close thing. "You're together? I can't believe you guys!"

They both looked at him surprised, taking a moment to gather their wits.

"I didn't have you pegged for homophobic, Eli." Young said mildly. "Come in and close the door."

Eli hovered for a split second before stepping in, talking and hitting the door closure at the same time. "Homopho…that's not it at all!” He walked forward till stopped by a console in front of him. “You don't even get it, do you? Neither of you! I can't believe you guys could DO this to me!"

Young squinted at Eli, not following the angry young man's conversation.

"You're being melodramatic Eli." Rush snapped, and Young could have told him that was not the right thing to say. "What is your problem?"

"Melodramatic?!" Eli was fully shouting now, gesticulating with both hands. "What is my problem? It's you guys! You make me choose, make me stress, make me run between, split my loyalties, spend years, YEARS, worrying about how I'm going to manage you both, and the whole time you've been screwing?"

Eli thumped his fist down on a console and Young could see he was on the verge of another outburst. Not moving from where he was leaning on Rush, Young spoke quietly.

"We're not screwing." He said. "Although we are sleeping in the same bed sometimes."

 _And kissing…_ he thought, _don't forget the kissing. We have kissed._

"Oh and that makes it SO much better." Eli shot back.

Young gave him a long look, he could feel Rush tensing for a retort under his arms, and slid a hand down to squeeze his bicep warningly. Rush’s injured hand shifted on the console.

"It's also not forever. Only since the volcano beach planet." Young told him.

Eli gave him a suspicious look and glanced at Rush for confirmation. Rush shrugged, although awkwardly with Young leaning on his shoulders.

"It's true Eli." Rush said with a slight nod.

Eli stared at them, his anger gradually melting into total confusion.

"How?" he asked finally. "Just, like, how? And why?"

"None of your business!" Rush rapped out.

Eli looked chastened.

"Am I the only one who knows?" he asked a moment later. "This isn't another one of your horrific secrets I'm going to have to keep all on my own again is it?"

Rush snorted and Young sighed, feeling a little guilty.

"No Eli," Young said, before Rush could speak, "TJ knows, go talk to TJ in private in the morning, get it off your chest."

He stood, squeezing Rush's bicep again. "Come on Rush, finish up. Let's go to bed."

Even to Young that sounded like a relationship sort of comment. Particularly as Rush did as he asked, closed the console down and stood.

“Good night Eli.” Young said.

Bemusedly, Eli wished them both a good night.

Rush followed Young out of the room. Young wasn’t entirely sure if he actually wanted to go to bed, or just the strong chance that was just because he did not want to have to talk to Eli. Young turned to Rush a little further down the corridor, waiting till they had moved out of the high traffic areas, despite the fact it was late.

"You want to crash with me tonight, or were you just escaping Eli?" He asked very quietly.

Rush paused mid step and looked at him a little surprised. "I'd have said if I didn't." He murmured. "Your quarters or mine?"

Young shrugged. "Yours are easier to sneak out of in the morning. My bed’s cold by now."

"God it's like being fourteen again." Rush complained.

"You snuck out of other guys' rooms in the morning at fourteen?"

Rush gave him a derisive look. "Girls, but yes, Colonel."

"Fourteen, I'm impressed."

Rush made a disgusted noise.

The air was a little chilly in Rush's quarters as he slid out of his pants to stand in his underwear, watching Rush sit down on the edge of his bed and do the same. Rush slid into bed, shuddering as his skin hit the cold sheets.

"Well?" He looked up at Young from where he sat in the bed. "Are you getting in? I didn't invite you here to look pretty."

"No, it's my sparkling wit and personality." Young quipped.

"Or the fact that despite your wit and personality, you put out heat like you wouldn't believe, actually making it worth having you about. Get in bed."

Rush laid back and pushed the pillow up under his head, rolling to face Young.

"Now there's an offer I don't get often." Young said sarcastically. "Do you know exactly how dysfunctional this is?"

"Shut up." Rush said, as Young climbed into the bed. "I thought we'd agreed that talking about this was not something that was going to happen."

"Not in so many words, but I think we'd taken it as read." He regarded Rush without moving from where he was sitting up next to him. "Do you think Eli will talk to TJ?"

"Well, I think you can pretty much guarantee that one. Now, are you lying down, or staring at me all night?"

Young looked at Rush, who blinked at him, expectant and a little birdlike, sharp and quick. He scooted down the bed then rolled and spooned back into Rush. Rush wrapped an arm around his waist and relaxed with a sigh.

 


	31. Two uncomfortable conversations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Young avoids a difficult conversation, Eli does not

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A very short chapter, still, I'm pleased just to be getting slowly back into it.

_There was a breeze that raised goosebumps across his skin and he rubbed his hands over his upper arms to warm them. In the moonlight, Young could see the sea over the edge of the balcony. The washed out reflection cast a white path across its surface to the black horizon and though it was calm he could hear the waves washing over the shingle at the shore. He leaned forward in his seat and rested an arm on the wooden railing letting the night wash over him._

_There were soft footsteps in the room behind him and the door to the balcony opened._

_"You can't sit out here staring at the sea all night." Rush said sourly. "Come to bed."_

_Young turned a little to look up at him amused._

_"Come to bed." Rush repeated more gently and leaned in and kissed him._

_Young wrapped his hand around the back of Rush's head and slipped his other arm into Rush's shirt, hanging loose and unbuttoned despite the freshness of the night air. Young's heart was beginning to thump in his chest as he let Rush pull him to his feet without breaking the kiss and wrap his arms around him. His hand skated up Rush's spine to settle between his shoulder blades, pressed into his warm skin, pulling Rush towards him._

_He was almost intoxicated by the sensation of Rush's beard tickling against his skin in counterpoint to the slick tongue flicking across his lips in a request for entry. He opened his lips to the other man, falling into the kiss and into Rush who responded with a groan..._

And again, Young woke, heart thumping in his chest, fingers gripping into Rush's flesh and the groan was his as Rush pushed back against him.

"Young, wake up." Rush muttered, pushing at Young’s chest again.

"Yeah." Young mumbled. "'M awake." He blinked and faintly realised he was pressed against Rush’s chest.

"You want to let me go?"

Young untangled his fingers from the other man's t-shirt and rolled away.

"Nightmare?" Rush asked him.

"Not exactly." Young said quietly, staring at the ceiling and trying to will his arousal away.

Rush snorted, definitely figuring out Young's problem.

"Sorry." Young apologised.

Young was not sure what to expect of him, but Rush simply shoved at Young one handed, rolling Young to face away from him, then spooned up behind him and collapsed back down into to the pillow.

"Go back to sleep Young." Rush said into the back of his neck, wrapping an arm round his chest. Young could feel the splint pressing against the back of his head where it was resting on the pillow.

Rush appeared to be asleep in seconds. Young took considerably longer to go to sleep, startled at the lack of reaction as much as he was embarrassed.

xxxoooxxx

The infirmary hatch hissed open. TJ ignored it for a moment, examining the dressings she was boiling in an anti-bacterial solution to disinfect them. She twisted the tongs carefully to see the other side, trying not to drip on the table, waving a careful hand through the steam to examine the results.

"Uh?"

TJ turned at the hesitant noise by the doorway. Eli was standing, looking uncomfortable, half in and half out of the infirmary door.

"Hi Eli."

"Can I talk to you?" He stepped into the room.

TJ smiled at him. "Yeah, no problem. Come in."

TJ carefully lowered the dressings back into the steaming pot in front of her. Eli hit the door closure and wandered over as she put the tongs down on the plate next to her.

Eli took a moment, apparently working out how to start. He did not look like he was in pain, or frightened at all, which suggested it was something embarrassing. TJ put her best understanding medical professional look on her face.

"What's wrong Eli?" She asked gently. "Something that's bothering you? Something that you're not sure whether you need to show me?"

Eli looked surprised for a moment.

"No, I’m okay, it's not something wrong with me." He said quickly. "It's ah, someone else."

"Someone that you're worried about?" She asked. "Maybe you could let them know I'd be happy to see them in private if they're worried."

"No," he said, "it's nothing like that."

There was another long pause, Eli's eyes flicking across the drying racks behind her. TJ waited for Eli to gather his thoughts, watching as he shifted awkwardly from foot to foot.

"Um, I saw Colonel Young and Rush last night." He said.

TJ cocked her head slightly. "Did they say something that bothered you?" She asked neutrally. "I thought you weren't having so many problems with their...conflicting demands on your time?"

Eli shook his head. "It's not that, well, it kinda is..."

"Too much work?"

"No, I...kinda saw them together..." Eli said awkwardly, leaning on the bed nearest her work station.

"Together?" TJ asked.

She had a horrible feeling this was not going to be good news and it definitely was not her secret to share if Eli had caught sight of something he should not have.

"Yeah, like, going to bed." Eli said. "Like the Colonel told Rush he was up to late...time to come to bed, you know."

TJ nodded, waiting for him to go on before she offered any information.

"They told me to come and talk to you about it." Eli said, meeting her eyes.

TJ's relief was palpable.

Eli scowled a little. "I kinda might have been a little annoyed with them."

"Why?" TJ asked, genuinely curious.

"'Cause I've been stressed out about them not getting on for so long and they're like, together."

TJ laughed. "They've not been together that long." She offered.

"Yeah. They said the volcano beach planet." Eli pushed himself up to sit on the bed. "I didn't notice anything there though. But the Colonel was leaning on Rush's shoulders and then the Colonel told Rush to come to bed, not go to bed." Eli paused, "I might not have guessed if he hadn't said that."

TJ stopped herself from offering the slightly sour observation that the Colonel was pretty good at hiding relationships.

"Are you okay with it?" She asked instead.

"Yeah, I guess so." Eli shrugged. "It'll make things easier for me."

"If they're talking, yeah, I should think so." She agreed.

"It's only me and you that know though." Eli said, a half statement, half question from the look he shot her, evidently looking for confirmation.

"I'm pretty certain Dr Macarthur knows. But no-one else on Destiny." TJ verified. "Just you and me."

"I’m glad I’m not the only one who knows. I'm not sure what to think about it TJ." Eli admitted. "Like, I've got so much experience in relationships you know." He added a little self-deprecatingly.

"But you're okay they're two guys right."

"Oh yeah," Eli said almost off-handedly, "like, with Mom's illness, all the family support groups you know." He caught her eyes, face a little too neutral. "I grew up knowing loads of people like..." His voice tailed off.

TJ smiled sympathetically. "I guess you would."

"I mean it's not just a gay disease but..."

"Yeah, there are a lot of gay people who do contract it." She nodded, agreeing with his unfinished statement. She gave the dressings a stir. "It's not reminding you of your mom being sick and bothering you though?" She asked, feeling a little concerned.

Eli shook his head. "I'm not there with her, but this is the first time we haven't had to worry about her medical bills or what treatment is covered. And she misses me but she's pleased about me having a cool job. And like, now she knows it's me  when I visit, and I can tell her about what's going on and the cool stuff." He gave TJ a warm smile. "I think I'm less worried about her now than I've ever been. You know if she's lucky she'll get to be a grandma...well, great aunt at least."

TJ chuckled. "You'll meet someone Eli. Look at how well your other self on Novus did. You know you've got it in you now."

Eli gave her a grin. "Yeah." He said. "I guess you're right."


	32. Forward movement

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Projects progress, and Young finds Rush more amenable to interaction.

Rush sat in the control chair on the bridge. The ship was in a stationary orbit around one of the gas giants, the seedship was fabricating more panels for the dome repair and being honest there was little for him to do. Being on the bridge when Destiny was stationary was a somewhat conflicting responsibility. Whilst he was certain his presence was necessary, for various reasons, not least of which was that it was _his_ ship, the shift was somewhat slow.

In front of him, Calvos was teaching Airman Barnes how to read the short range sensor array with little asides into Ancient vocabulary. Rush himself was running sensor sweeps of the atmosphere of the planet below, vaguely wondering what the seed ships manufactory could make with the components of it. There were significant amounts of liquid methane clouds as well as nitrogen and based on the seed ship’s ability to acquire air and water for them at the previous stop there was a strong chance harvesting methane and nitrogen were well within its capabilities.

Not that he had a use for them yet, but it wasn’t like they were short on storage space. There was a strong possibility it could provide constituents to replace the still leaking coolant fluid, but the need to fix that was a debate he had no hope of winning till the Dome was complete. He opened up the panel to look at the progress of the manufactory controls. That at least was almost complete.

Now he just had to wait for the two parties undertaking work for the dome, Volker and Scott on the shuttle and Brody and Atienza around the dome itself to get back to him back with further information.

He looked at the supply manifesto for the dome constituents. He paused, rubbing his jaw with the back of a finger. There was the secondary dome also. Smaller than the garden dome, they had checked it and written it off on arrival, it had a big hole in the dome, wasn't holding atmosphere and didn’t have the connections into the ships air and water systems that designated it as a garden area. It was no more useful in that respect than any other room that was still intact.

However, if they had the supplies to fix it available, it might make sense to get it done. Maybe they could even connect it up to the air and water systems. He turned the idea over in his head, then increased the fabrication quantities of glass and struts. Better to have it available, it was spares in case any were damaged working on the main dome anyway and there was storage space on the seed ship.

And that thought brought him back to the storage rooms. The investigation party for the storage room were also preparing for a first trip towards the storage again. This time the plan involved additional investigation of a few of the rooms that opened off the route, as some random late night map investigation by Brody and Volker had suggested that there might be some engineering or scientific facilities on side corridors. However until the day itself, his involvement in that expedition was only peripheral, due to his inability to join the party. He flexed the fingers of his injured hand cautiously, wincing a little.

So much time wasted waiting on other people.

Resting his injured hand in his lap, he went back to his examination of the manufactory controls and how to create items from scratch once the dome panels were finished. That at least he was able to work on immediately.

His first test objects were going to be glassware for Lieutenant Johansen made from the surplus dome glass. He was sure that she would be more than grateful for some completely heat resistant, practically unbreakable containers and other medical supplies. His first project would be two mortar and pestles, so she did not need to continue grinding dried barks to powder with the hilt of a combat knife and a spoon, followed by some containers and stoppers. He began to manipulate the system to define the dimensions in the work scheduling program. Anything to keep his mind occupied.

xxxoooxxx

Young found himself drifting into the core interface room later that evening. Rush was running figures on a console, occasionally referring back to a diagram. It looked to Young like it was related to the work Brody had done earlier on the dome.

Young was really missing the dome. He hadn't been in there that often, but when he was in there he had appreciated the room. With the plants and the water the air in there felt almost real, almost like being outdoors. Even Icarus though it was an underground bunker had had access to the surface, to fresh air, sun and the wind on his face.

“You know what I miss.” Young mused.

Rush looked up from the console with a querying look.

“Weather.”

Rush gave him a slightly disbelieving look.

“It’s always the same on Destiny.” He said. “And we wouldn’t want it not to be.” He added hastily at Rush’s scowl.

“No.” The other man said sourly. “Because that would mean that the life support was damaged.”

Young sighed. “Fresh air?” He suggested.

“That maybe.” Rush admitted, tapping at the keyboard. “You didn’t get outside when you were back on Earth?”

“I wasn’t quite in the mood when I got away from the emails.” Young scowled. “I just want her to stop hassling me.”

“You’re not happy she’s moving on?” Rush looked up at him.

"Maybe I haven't got any leg to stand on in this. I mean I'm kind of seeing someone as well." Young said. It had the feeling of an admission as he spoke. "Though you aren't someone she knows."

"Not likely to cause quite the same emotional impact." Rush agreed.

"I don't know why I'm talking to you about this." Young said looking away in embarrassment.

"I don't know how we managed to get from talking about lack of weather to talking about your ex-wife." Rush muttered sharply.

Young's gaze flicked back to him, but Rush's face was not in tune with the tone of his voice, almost as if the response was given automatically.

Rush shut down the console, stepped out and to Young’s surprise, walked over to him putting a hand on his arm.

“My turn to tell you to come to bed now?” He asked.

Young gave him a rueful grin. “Yeah. Lets go.”

xxxoooxxx

Young watched the shuttle manoeuvre carefully, and the panel begin to drift almost imperceptibly away as the magnetic docking clamps released it from the feet of the shuttle. The suited figures, Brody and Atienza - Young was not sure which was which, caught it and gradually redirected it down, into the dome, feet locking on an intact wall of the dome room as they walked down towards the floor and the hole the panel would fill.

Eight more panels. Just eight more panels and the walls were complete and the area around the dome sealed against vacuum. If it all worked.

After the walls, then the dome struts. After the dome struts then the dome glass. Then the refit of the garden. And then there would be fresh food again. There was a little being grown at the moment, dotted in various points over the ship like house plants, mainly to see if plants they had picked up would grow. Rutabananas appeared to be like the purple sweet potatoes and grow like weeds in anything you tried to grow them in. The crunchy radishy roots were less successful.

On the other side of the bridge, Rush was watching the exploration party to the far storage room making occasional comments. Young had not really wanted to be running that excursion at the same time as the dome repairs, but he wasn’t going to let anything stop those.

“Stop!” Rush’s voice cracked out. “Go round those crates. You can’t see it from there, the kino is higher than you.”

“Where are you looking?” Chloe asked.

“Far right corner, on the wall.” Rush said.

Young could see him moving the kino, his hands on the controls even if Young couldn’t see the screen from here.

“Colonel,” Rush looked over at him. “I think you‘re going to want to see this.”

Rush tapped at the console and a holo-screen appeared in front of Young, the kino feed, the back wall of the storage room.

Three more space suits. Just hanging on the wall, almost exactly like they had found the others.

“What room is this?” Young asked.

“Some sort of repair station.” Rush said. “These are all tools and some emergency repair kits. There’s some squingies and other components. Not many left though, and the crates look like they’ve been opened by repair robots, see the clamp marks on the lids.”

“We need some more of those robots.” Young said.

“When I _actually_ find _any_ time to go through the _whole_ inventory of the manufactory and work out what the hell everything is, you might actually get some.”

Young ignored him and toggled the communications. “Chloe, pick them up and come back. Everything else can wait till tomorrow.”

“Are you sure about that?” Rush asked him.

“Six suits?” Young asked incredulously. “I’m damn certain. It’ll drop hours off the repair time for the dome.”

“If they work.” Rush said.

“Even if we can only fix one, it’ll speed us up.” Young said. “With those you might actually get your coolant leak fixed.”

Rush’s look spoke volumes.

“There’s no need to humour me, Colonel.”

Young chuckled. “I’m being realistic.” He said. “I’ll leave the pessimism to you. With six suits, we’re in a much better position.”

“Possibly.” Rush said. He flexed his injured hand uncomfortably.

“Well, it’s up to you.” Young countered. “You’re the only one I can spare to fix them.”

Rush just scowled.

xxxoooxxx

The suits tested reasonably well. The seals were still sound, but two required some repair to the control systems and one of those to the locking mechanism on the feet. It took Rush two days to get them all working and fully tested.

Young spent the two days swapping shuttle shifts with Scott. He had taken Greer as his co-pilot leaving Volker to work with Scott. Once the new suits were finished though, he was going to have to make a decision on who to put in the suits. Volker was used to working with Brody and would look like the obvious choice, though he actually didn’t have the engineering background and had very limited suit time. Greer on the other hand had a great deal of suit time and was fine to follow orders from Brody and knew his way round the welding torch. Either choice would leave them without a co-pilot for one of the ships.

Chloe and Barnes had made their way through to the other storage chamber. Like the first it was almost stripped of parts for repairs, but included a few more mundane items, such as bed linens, tableware, buckets and containers for liquids which looked to hold about eight to ten gallons to Young’s eye. The small party had spent a day identifying items, then Young had dispatched some less technical staff to start clearing it into the other room to leave it free for a second hydroponics room. The kino-sled had also been loaded up with a selection of items and brought back.

It was reasonably late when he got back to his quarters again. Rush was sitting on the edge of the bed, rolling his shoulders and wincing.

“Pain?” Young asked.

“Just stiff.” Rush muttered. “Been hunched over those suits for two days.”

Rush bent over to remove his shoes and winced with an inhale of breath.

Young looked over at the counter. The medicated ointment Rush had had for his hands was there still.

“Take your shirt off and lay down on your front.” Young said impulsively, walking over and picking up the ointment..

Rush gave him a disbelieving look.

“It’ll fix you up quicker than anything else.” Young said. “I mean you could just take some of TJ’s tea, but you’ll still wake up stiff. You let me work out the muscles you’ve got a better chance of waking up able to move properly.”

With a huff that might have been laughter or irritation, Rush pulled off his pants and struggled out of his shirts. He gave Young a look, then took an elastic band from his pocket and bound his hair up in a ponytail high on the back of his head. Young watched as he lay face down on the bed then moved over to sit next to him.

“Ready?”

“As I’m ever going to be.” Rush said, grimacing as he shifted, trying to find a comfortable position.

Young scooped out a blob of cream and warmed it between his hands, before putting his hands on Rush’s shoulders. Rush twitched, groaned and then lay still as Young began to rub the muscles in his shoulders and neck. He went gently to start with, feeling out where Rush was most tense, where the worst knots were. It wasn’t hard to find, Rush grimaced whenever he hit a sore spot.

He continued to work carefully at Rush’s shoulders and neck. The quiet manual work and physical contact was relaxing for him as well as Rush, who as his shoulder muscles, began to loosen became progressively more relaxed all over.

“Better?” He asked Rush quietly.

Rush rolled his shoulders and hummed. “Yes, thank you.” Rush’s voice was equally quiet.

Young sat back a little, one hand still on Rush’s shoulder. He looked down at the other man for a moment.  Rush opened his eyes and blinked at him slowly.

“Bed?” Rush murmured.

Young gave his shoulder a gentle squeeze. “Good idea.”

He shucked out of his pants and jacket. Rush had not moved from his position on the bed, Young had expected him to pull a shirt back on, but Rush didn’t seem very inclined to move. Young paused, looking at the almost naked man in his bed, then shrugged and turned out the lights. Under cover of darkness he lay down next to Rush and pulled the covers over them. He threw an arm over Rush.

He froze as Rush shifted a little, moving closer. Young was hyperaware of the bare skin under his hand, but Rush simply scooted over so his side was along Young’s body, turning his head so his nose pressed up against Young’s shoulder then relaxed again with a sleepy noise.

Rush was warm and the scent of medicated cream filled the gap under the covers. Young forced himself to relax from the feet up, dismissing the feel of bare skin against the arm that wrapped around Rush.

 


	33. Wet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The dome is completed and a planetary mission goes awry.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, sorry it's been a long time coming.

The additional suits sped up the work on the dome by a significant amount. Young could see that Rush was finding it extremely frustrating that he was not able to participate, his hand still being splinted. Still, with the additional suits, there was no reason not to start training up more crew in their use and it provided an added incentive for the cross training between science and military crew members.

Once the actual construction work started up Young was taking his shifts in the shuttle and barely saw Rush in the daytimes. When they weren’t actually moving construction parts with the shuttle, Young and Scott were training up Volker, TJ and Greer in flying it. Surprisingly enough Volker grasped the basics reasonably quickly, enough that Young was planning that he should arrange Volker some in atmosphere training the next time they stopped at a planet for long enough. He also requested, via Camile, that Volker, with less flight time of any kind than Greer and TJ be given some simulator time back on Earth if possible.

Young himself was too busy to take any leave time on Earth. He had had his briefing with O’Neill and Telford, and thankfully, O’Neill had supported his statement that with so many crew involved with the repairs to the dome and the setting up of the second hydroponics area, that there was no-one to spare to exchange with Telford’s scientists. The only scientists who were being allowed through were working with Rush setting up the new hydroponic facilities.

The spare warehouse room had taken some time to clear, but once empty enough, Young had delegated Rush to connect it into the water, air and power systems sufficiently to allow gardening. It did indeed keep Rush busy, increasing and altering the lighting, connecting water pipes and increasing the airflow as around him crew members and scientists set up crates welded into long troughs and other containers, a new moon pool of dome glass and deep sealed bins of waste matter being composted down anaerobically.

One thing he knew for certain, was that Rush had no energy to pursue any other projects, as he was falling into Young’s bed exhausted almost every night. Mostly Young just threw an arm over him and went to sleep, but nights when Rush seemed in particular pain from his healing hand or stiff from hunching over, Young was tempted to do....something. Something to make him relax, or elicit the wry half smile from the other man. Somehow he could never find enough of a reason or an excuse to do it.

xxxoooxxx

It was almost two weeks before the dome was finally roofed over.  A further day for Brody to check panels, seals and joints and finally, he and Rush pronounced it air tight.

It seemed like the entire crew was on tenterhooks the morning of the pressurizing of the dome and certainly there were more of the crew on the bridge and in the core room watching the dome on the sensors as air flooded back through the newly repaired vents.

Young announced a small celebration in the Observation Lounge and authorised an extra meat and fruit addition to the evening meal and Becker offered a newly blended variant on the caffeinated tea drink made with the dried skin of one of the fruits. The mild caffeine hit made a surprising amount of impact on the decaffeinated crew and the celebration was upbeat with quite a bit of dancing.

xxxoooxxx

Rush watched Calvos and Eli who were sitting at the bar area, rather than dancing, playing some Lucian Alliance game which looked a bit like Backgammon. More to the point he was watching Calvos watching Eli. Calvos was considerably more circumspect than Eli, who couldn’t hide an emotion for love nor money. Calvos was pleasant and friendly, nothing that anyone could consider inappropriate, but his obvious affection and interest in Eli still showed. Rush wondered if that was how he looked when he interacted positively with Young or if he managed to keep a more neutral expression. Not that they interacted positively in public. As if Young had heard his thoughts, he turned from speaking to the crew man who had just entered, and walked over to Rush.

“The count down clock just started.” Young said.

“How long?” Rush asked.

“Two hours ten. Seed ship is manoeuvring to dock.”

“Not long till we leave.” Rush noted. “Who has the bridge shift tonight?”

“Varro.”

Rush frowned. “Does he have in-FTL experience?”

Young shook his head. “No way are you taking his shift.” He said quietly.

Rush let the frown become a scowl as he turned to stare at the window where he could see the seed ship coming in towards them. “Forgive me for having some concern for the ship and crew.”

“I know you.” Young said. “And you’re in the same position as I am, and the rest of the working parties, in serious need of sleep.”

“And it’s time for bed?” He queried with a sideways look at Young.

Rush surprised himself with how easy it was to say it  to Young. He didn’t want to go to bed alone though. In the last month, he’d had four nights alone and they were cold. After being so solitary for so long, it was incredibly easy to just accept Young in his space, to become accustomed to sleeping in Young’s bed each night.

“Yeah. It’s time for bed.”

xxxoooxxx

The kino floated through the stargate and they crowded round the screen waiting to see what the planet was like. They had only been in FTL for a week or so, before they dropped out here, in range of two planets, one locked out and the other available.

Rush was at the gate console, tapping away with both hands at the controls around the video feed.

The splint had come off of Rush’s hand, and TJ had prescribed some gentle exercises to build strength. With limited success, Young had pressured Rush into doing them mornings and evenings as he was pretty certain he would ignore them otherwise.

Young leaned over Rush’s shoulder to look at the pictures on the screen.

The sky was a slightly greenish blue, with white cumulus clouds. The area they were looking at looked like a series of small islands in a wide open lake like area. The stargate sat several metres above the level of the lake on it's base. Something like reeds, but leafier was growing around the edge of the island and the ground was covered in a moss like growth.

What was most surprising though was the bridges. Made of some brown substance that they could not identify at first glance, they spanned the water between the islands, apparently set on pilings into the lake bed.

"Wow." said Eli. "Bridges. Does that mean there's people there?"

"Aliens maybe." Young said "The Novus settlers never got out of their own galaxy."

"I don't see anyone around." Brody said, manipulating the kino to spin on it's axis and give them a view all round. "Just more of those bridges. Maybe it's deserted."

"They're obviously made by someone." Eli said

“Okay. How long have we got on the clock?” Young asked.

“Two days unless I override.” Rush said. He stepped round Young to go to the other console, leaving the rest of them watching the kino feed. “Destiny is indicating this planet is a food and water resource.”

“Anything in particular?” Young queried.

“No.” Rush replied shortly.

“What do the sensors say?” Young asked, trying to be patient. “Any radio signals from the planet?”

Rush squinted at the screen, Young walked over and handed him his own reading glasses. Rush snorted, but held them up to his eyes to read the text.

“No radio.” He said shortly. “But those are still bridges.”

“Okay.” Young said. “It’s a food resource, so I can’t ignore it. We’ll send a team through. Scott, you can take Greer, Eli, Barnes, Hansen and Marques as a investigating party and I’ll have a foraging party make ready.”

“I’m going.” Rush said, still staring at the screen.

“Are you?”

“There’s some unusual readings here.” Rush looked up from the screen. “Unusual radiation, nothing that we’ve previously come across.”

“Is it dangerous?”

“No, and it’s something that won’t show up on our equipment, I’ll need to reconfigure a Kino remote to pick it up.”

Young frowned. “You can send Eli.”

Rush scowled back. “With all respect to Eli’s scientific abilities...”

“Hey!” Eli interrupted, but Rush ignored him.

“...he’s a maths graduate,” he said sarcastically, “this is a little beyond him at the moment.”

Young looked at Rush. It was true that he’d been cooped up for weeks, and Young didn’t doubt there were odd readings, just that they were as important as Rush was intimating they were. He shrugged.

“Fine, if TJ signs you off as fit to go, then you can join the party.”

TJ’s only stipulation had been that under no circumstances was he to stress his hand or fire a gun as the recoil was liable to damage the newly healing bones and weakened muscles. Rush had just snorted.

Young sighed when Rush told him and walked down to the gate room to see the party off and wait with the foraging crew for news it was safe to go through.

xxxoooxxx

They stepped out onto the mossy island, the soldiers moving out instantly, scanning the area cautiously while Rush and Eli stepped away from the gate. Eli crouched, cutting samples of the “moss” and other plants and stuffing them in pots for testing while Rush shut down and reopened the gate. Packing the samples quickly, Eli rolled the container back through the gate as Scott pulled out his radio.

He radioed in that the area around the gate was deserted and they stepped away, a few minutes later the gate opened again and a handful of crew walked out with carry baskets.

“We’re to collect more of the reeds sir,” Airman Christophides informed the Lieutenant, “and collect further samples.”

“Stay within sight of the gate.” Scott instructed. “We’re moving out to investigate.”

Closer to, the bridges and pontoons between the low lying islands could be seen to be constructed of reeds bound in tight bundles with further plaited reeds, forming quite an even surface, attached to posts that looked like plastic from a distance, but up closer appeared to be some sort of compacted substance. There were markings on the posts, indented into the surface as if the posts had been made with the markings on there, but their meaning was not apparent in any way.

Rush crouched by a post and poked at the surface of a bridge then stood and carefully tested his weight on it with a single foot. Some of the bundles were more degraded than others which looked quite new, as if some had been replaced, but the structure itself seemed sound.

"They look quite primitive but seem strong." He reported, and stepped out onto the pontoon bridge.

“Environmentally friendly.” Eli offered.

The bridge barely moved and he walked the short distance to the next island. The others watched, Greer, Scott and Barnes with guns held loosely ready to react.

Nothing happened.

"Looks safe enough." Greer said.

Scott gestured him forward and they walked to the next island to join Rush.

None of these islands were at the height of the island that held the gate, and most were obscured by the plants that clustered waist high and sometimes more round the edge of the islands. There was another island visible maybe half a mile away which rose higher than the gate island and Eli pointed at it.

"We'd get a better look around from there." He said.

Scott nodded. There was still no sight or sound of anything sentient here and although they could all hear creatures moving in the water and among the plants there was nothing to be seen.

As they moved away from the Gate, the water appeared to get shallower and the plants taller. The sky was very blue, more so than it usually was on Earth, almost cartoonish. The second island they walked across led to a different sort of bridge, curving up over the clear water underneath and with guard rails.

“For boats?” Greer asked looking over the edge, down at the water, from the top of the arch.

“Your guess is as good as mine Sergeant.” Rush said, joining him, knocking the knuckles of his left hand against the material the guard rail was made of. “It’s the same material as the posts though.”

The hill was obvious from the top of the bridge and from there they could see some sort of structure, open-sided with a roof, on the top of the tallest island.

"We still making for there Lieutenant?" Greer asked, indicating the structure as Scott joined them.

"It's the best vantage point." Scott said.

From the next island it was still possible to see the hill rising above the plants and via a winding route, with several backtracks on dead end islands, they made their way towards it. They scared up several groups of creatures as they travelled, a number of odd creatures which swam across the surface of the water like ducks, but didn’t appear as if they could fly and a cloud of insect like life which they all backed off from until they had dispersed.

“I think there are people here.” They all turned to look at Airman Marques.

She pointed at a patch of sky just above the skyline where there was a break in the clouds.

“That looks just like a contrail.”

They stared at it.

“Yep.” Scott said. “That does look like a contrail.”

“Which suggests that the people here are technologically advanced.” Rush said. “And that we may be in a first contact situation, based on the fact that they don’t seem to think that the Gate is anything of importance.”

They made their way across another couple of the pontoons and were finally at the pontoon leading to the hill with the structure, before Greer, in the lead stopped.

“I can hear something.” He called back.

They stopped again and faintly, there was a humming, which seemed to come from two directions, and as it increased in volume, seemed to break into two or more individual sounds.

They scaled the hill. The structure was very much as they had first seen it an open sided gazebo type structure. What they hadn’t seen from the distance was the pillar with an obvious sign on the top. It was a little low for humans, around thigh height and was obviously a display. Rush examined the panel on the top, an angled board of the same material with a picture with captions in the borders. The picture was unclear, as if some of the picture had not been printed, or wasn’t visible. He took a picture of the board with his phone and stuffed it back in the cargo pocket of his borrowed BDUs.

The humming was getting closer and he turned to where the soldiers were staring out towards the horizon. In the distance, a number of boats came into view around one of the islands. In the distance, Rush could also see a greyish smudge on the horizon, which might, if he squinted, be some sort of city.

The apparent boats got closer. At a distance it was hard to see what they were.

“Binoculars?” Rush asked Greer. Greer pulled out a rifle scope from a pocket.

“Good enough.” Rush said.

Greer lifted it the scope to his eye and pointed it toward the boats.

“Optical binoculars should be easy enough to make in the manufactory.” Rush told the sergeant as he focussed the sight on the boats. “Dome glass, the lenses are a standard geometric shape.”

“They look armed.” He reported, and passed the scope to Scott.

Rush decided he regretted the fact he was unarmed.

“Are you sure staying here is a good idea?” Eli said a little frantically. “I mean they have guns.”

“So do we.” Rush said sharply.

“Shooting first in a first contact situation is usually not a good idea.” Scott said.

Rush thought it sounded as if he was reciting something learned, which did not fill him with confidence.

“Ducking first usually is though.” Greer muttered next to Rush.

Rush snorted. As usual he found he trusted Greer’s assessment of the situation as more realistic.

The boats drew closer, the noise of whatever was powering them sounding like a buzzsaw, with a rushing hissing noise over them.

“May I see, Lieutenant?” Rush asked.

He pointed the scope at the boats and took a good look. They were skimming over the surface of the water, didn’t seem to be sitting lower in the water like a true boat would. Rush could hear the pregnant pause as they waited for him to speak again.

“They aren’t boats.” Rush said. “They look like hovercraft or those rafts with the fan on the back the way they are travelling over the water.”

“Does that matter?” Eli asked.

“Yeah.” Greer said grimly. “Hovercraft can travel on land as well. Especially real flat land like most of it around here.”

“Oh crap.” Eli said in a voice Rush considered way too loud considering their situation.

“Only if they are hostile.” Scott said.

“We can only hope they aren’t.” Rush’s voice was decidedly cynical as he handed the scope back.

There was a rush of sound, a whoosh followed by a thumping deadened sound. Water fountained up behind them where whatever projectile it was that had passed Greer by about a foot smacked into the marshy pond.

“Fuck!” Eli yelped.

“First contact my ass!” Greer yelled, whipping up his gun to point it at the boats.

Scott pulled his radio to his lips, yelling instructions to the foraging team to send any civilians back and hold the gate.

“Hold the rear!” He ordered Airman Christophides.

They turned and ran. More projectiles rained down around them, mostly hitting the water, but one that had hit a bridge in front of Rush was splattered in a reddish gloopy puddle. Rush paused a moment to poke at it, and was forced to wrench his finger painfully away from the gluey substance.

“Keep away from the projectiles!” He yelled. “It’s some sort of glue.”

“Glue?” Scott yelled from the end of the bridge ahead of him.

“You get stuck in it, you aren’t going anywhere!” Rush called back sharply, which no doubt is the whole point.”

He leapt over the puddle of glue and ran as Scott yelled out.

“Avoid the gunk!”

They dodged the projectiles successfully enough. Rush was panting hard and Greer dropped back to pace him.

“You okay?”

“I’ll manage.” Rush gasped back. “Do you get the impression we’re being herded?”

“Back towards the gate?” Greer queried.

“Yes.”

There was a pause while they pounded across a rippling pontoon.

“Yeah.” Greer replied, breathless. “Seems that way.”

They skidded across another island, and another, and onto a arch bridge. As soon as his feet hit it, Rush could feel it shifting. He didn’t dare stop. A few paces ahead of him Greer slowed slightly, looking over his shoulder as the bridge moved again.

With a rush of air past him, a projectile hit the bridge directly in front of him and the whole structure dropped out from underneath his feet. There was a moment of falling, his stomach lurching before he hit the water, face first, passing only a couple of feet down before his face was pressed into the surface of the bridge now underwater.

He tried to push away from it, to get his feet under him, push his head above the water  but his feet slipped and slid. He was winded, and struggled not to panic, having his face trapped underwater bringing back sense memory that made his heart pound even faster, made his desperate to inhale. He opened his eyes, but could see nothing, a brackish muddy sea of muck.

He pressed his lips together and pushed up with his hands and his face finally broke the surface. His mouth opened involuntarily and he hauled in a lungful of mixed air and muddy water then coughed. He paddled desperately to keep his head above water. The substance that was so adhesive in the air was slick under water and his feet skidded over it as he tried to stand.

“Rush!” Greer’s shout was a welcome sound behind him as he struggled to breath.

A hand grabbed his collar and pulled, dragged him through the water and suddenly his feet caught on the submerged bridge. He pushed himself to standing with Greer’s help.

“We gotta go Rush!”

Greer tugged him along, out of the water.

“Where are the others?” Rush asked as they scrabbled up the bank.

“Leaving.” Greer said. “We don’t wanna get left behind.”

“And the ones behind us?”

“They’ll have to find a way round. It’s too deep to wade.”

His soaked clothes chafed as he ran, but there was no chance to stop. The weapons of the unseen aliens were still herding them towards the gate.  To his relief, Eli and Christophides who had been behind them caught up with them three islands later, as soaked as they were, but alive. As the reached the gate it was open, Scott waving them through as they ran through it.

xxxoooxxx

 Young was glad to see all of the crew members who had left the ship come back through the gate.

“They were definitely herding us off their planet.” Greer said. “I’m pretty certain that gunk wouldn’t have killed us, just trapped us.”

Young nodded. “But they didn’t actually hit any of you.”

“Don’t really think they were trying sir.”

“Okay, go get yourselves cleaned up.”

As the last of the party cleared out of the gateroom, Young walked over to Rush who was the last to walk towards the door.

"Are you okay?" Young asked Rush.

Rush stopped and gave him a surprised look as if he was not expecting Young to have asked, brows furrowing a little. "Yeah," he said after a moment, "I'm fine."

"Come on." Young said, and left the room.

He walked out, but rather than taking the more usual left hand turn he hung a right and then another until they were in a quiet corridor.

"You look like crap." He said, and before Rush could react, stepped forward and wrapped him in a hug.

There was a moment's startled jerk from Rush, then he softened into the hug. Young could feel the cold water from Rush's soaked clothes soaking into his uniform, but he wasn’t sure he cared. He was wearing black anyway.

"It was pretty hairy there for a while." He said into Rush's neck, knowing what he really meant was I was worried you guys weren't coming back.

"I know." Rush said quietly and wrapped his arms round Young's waist.

Young was pretty certain that meant Rush understood what he had not said as well as what he had. They stood there for a moment, wrapped together, then Rush pulled back. Young let go of him instantly, but Rush didn't pull away fully, just enough to look into Young's face. His brows furrowed again, then he leaned forward and pressed his lips to Young's.

Young was startled for a moment, then wrapped his arms back round Rush and kissed back gently. It only lasted for a few seconds, but somehow it said what neither of them could say aloud.

It seemed to finish naturally and they both stepped back a little, just enough to leave a gap between them. Not enough that anyone watching would think it innocent though, Young thought.

"You should go get TJ to check you out as well." Young said huskily. "Yeah." Rush said. "When we're out of here."

"You're soaking wet."

"It'll wait." Rush countered.

“My other shirt and pants are clean.” Young said. “It’s on my chair in my quarters. Closer.”

“Thanks.” Rush said.

"Get changed and I'll meet you on the bridge." Young told him. "Don't want you getting pneumonia."

Rush regarded him for a moment, making Young uncomfortable, wondering why Rush did it. Then he leaned forward and brushed his lips over Young's again.

"Thanks." Rush said, nodded and walked away. Young watched him leave, trying to calm his breathing.


	34. Reparations

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Maybe they should have done something about the coolant leak earlier?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey look, another chapter! I had an epiphany, a reshuffle and it fell into place. :)

 

Young had managed to fend off Telford and his scientists for another two weeks, before he was forced to allow a visit to examine the work that had been done mending the dome and also further examination of the Seedship and the manufactory. While they had been in FTL, Rush had been working with it quite intensively, and had managed to identify three spare parts that it could make from its existing library of  programmed objects. Sadly only one of these was something the seedship actually had the materials to make.

Rush had however managed to get the seedship to create some very simple objects out of dome glass, including the objects Eli initially identified as “bowl and dildo” to Rush’s disgust, which were the promised mortar and pestle for TJ.

He had also managed some equally simple bottles, more of a carafe shape, than a true bottle, but they worked well enough in the kitchen and TJ had taken some for the infirmary.

This had been enough to keep the scientists busy for the whole time they were on Destiny luckily. Young wondered if that had been Rush’s intention, for as soon as they were busy troubling the science team about that, Rush had disappeared off and when Young tracked him down, he was deep in contemplation of schematics that Young recognised as the cold zone.

There had been other developments on the ship. Cloth woven by the crafts group had been finally presented to the crew. It wasn’t very durable yet, not suitable for outerwear, but it was already being made up into sleepwear and underwear.

They had stopped at a further planet, a vaguely Earthlike planet, but with no life. The temperature had been comfortable, but the oxygen levels very low. However, it had been a good source of minerals, which promised the potential for more things created by the manufactory. With six working suits they had been able to do a reasonable amount of mining. Young was beginning to feel like they were actually beginning to use the ships in some small way like they had actually been intended for.

Rush was still sleeping in his bed more often than not. They had settled into a reasonably comfortable, if very clandestine routine of going to sleep together. Rush’s sleep however had been disturbed on more than one occasion, waking Young in the night as he gasped for air, struggled against the covers or woke with a jerk. Young tried not to make a big deal of it, simply pulling the other man back down and wrapping an arm around him. It mostly settled Rush who seemed not to want to discuss it.

It was the crackle of the radio though that woke both Rush and Young out of a sound slumber, Rush squirming out of Young's arms and sitting up. Their radios were tuned to the emergency night channel. Any issue enough to make someone want to wake them was nothing Young wanted.

“Colonel Young, this is the bridge.” Calvos’ voice was worried.

Rush grabbed his radio from the side of the bed.

“Bridge this is Rush, what’s the problem.”

“We’ve had red warning lights pop up all over the bridge.” Calvos replied. “I can’t follow the detail of the warnings, but there’s pressure issues in the cold area.”

Rush scowled. “Read it off to...”

Calvos didn’t get a chance to reply as Destiny dropped abruptly out of FTL with a shudder and whine.

Young grabbed up his own radio.

“Bridge this is Young. What’s going on?”

“Unplanned stop sir.” Calvos said. “We’re looking into it.”

“I’ll be there immediately. Rush,” Young said, raising an eyebrow at the man in his bed, “meet me at the Bridge.”

Rush paused a moment, throwing Young his most sarcastic expression, before toggling his radio. “I’m already on my way, Colonel.”

There was a shudder underfoot, like a small earthquake, and momentarily Rush’s eyes widened. He threw his legs over the side of the bed and stood. "Come on!" He snapped at Young.

Grabbing up their radios from either side of the bed but not bothering to change from pyjama pants they both ran for the door barefooted. Rush hit the door release and they skidded out into the corridor outside Young's quarters and almost ran into Chloe who stopped with a shocked look.

"This is NOT the time to ask." Rush snapped at her. "Bridge now."

"Colonel Young, this is Camile, we appear to have dropped out of FTL, I wasn’t aware we were planning a layover?"

“We weren’t.” Rush said sharply into his radio. “Don’t worry, I’ll tell you as soon as I know what’s happening.”

“Thank you Colonel Young.” Camile replied acerbically.

"We’re on our way to the bridge." Young said tersely into his radio.

Rush put his radio to his lips as they ran, Chloe following.

"Eli, Volker, wake up! Bridge, now!" he yelled into it.

Young lifted his own radio, but their radios crackled again then Greer spoke.

"Colonel Young, this is Greer, was that the ship shaking?"

Rush beat him to it.

"Yes Sergeant it was, now kick Park and Volker out of bed and get Volker to the bridge."

Young looked at Rush.

"Park and Volker."

"Didn't you know?"

No, he hadn't known. The radio crackled again.

"Ah, okay, Doctor."

"Evidently Greer didn't know that you know." Young said as they slowed to open a door.

"Volker has about as much control of his facial expressions as Eli." Rush said.

There was another shudder.

"That's not good." Young said.

"Tell me something I don't know."

As soon as the bridge hatch opened, Calvos was getting out of the captain’s seat and Barnes relinquished the navigation chair to Chloe. Young let Rush seat himself in the captain’s chair without comment, standing beside him to look over his arm at the consoles. He waited for Rush and Chloe to read the consoles in front of them before he started asking questions.

“Where are we?”

“About a third of the way to our next projected stop.” Chloe said.

“What caused us to drop out?” Young asked as Brody entered, closely followed by Volker and Greer.

“The leak in the cold zone finally caused a rupture in one of the major power conduits which knocked out a bank of the shield emitters supplied by that conduit.” Rush said tersely. “Destiny dropped out of FTL to prevent the ship being pulled to pieces.”

Volker and Brody sat themselves in the remaining two chairs.

“Brody, we need to broaden the spread of the existing shield emitters to cover the damaged zone.”

“We already did that once already,” Brody said, sounding worried, “when your party went through to the cold zone. Spreading the power available is going to leave the shield pretty thin.”

“Well we don’t really have much choice Mister Brody, do we? We’re hemorrhaging coolant fluid and energy at the moment and we need to get to the nearest star system so we can repair the ship.”

“It’s going to cut our speed significantly.” Brody pointed out.

“Halve it.” Rush agreed. “Eli?” He said into the radio.

“Almost there.” The reply came immediately.

“Get yourself to the core room. I need full diagnostics of the damage.”

There was a huff in response. “I’m changing direction.”

Rush looked over at Young queryingly.

“Continue.” Young replied to the unspoken question. “It’s yours till we have a full idea of what happened and how to fix it.”

“Brody, get there with Eli, we need a repair schedule immediately.”  Rush continued.  “Volker, finish with the shield emitters.”

Brody gave Rush his normal long suffering nod and stood. Before he had even moved away Rush was gesturing Calvos into the empty chair.

“Chloe, what’s the nearest star system?”

“There’s one two days away with our in-system drive, probably four to five with the speed cut. I think this was the closest Destiny could get us without risking further damage.”

“Plot the course.” Rush instructed. “Avoid any areas likely to put strain on the shields, Keep a firm eye on the sensors Calvos. We’re going to need to review the course if we come near any significant hazards.”

“Hazards?” Young asked.

“At the moment, a small dust cloud could punch through the shield there.” Rush looked up from the console, meeting Young’s eyes. “It’s barely holding.”

“Great.” Young said. “Just great.”

xxxoooxxx

“So what’s the damage?” Young asked.

He, Rush, Brody, Scott and Eli were standing around the console in the Core Room. Young had left Camile on the Bridge with Volker, Calvos and Chloe.

“We have another hole in the hull.” Brody pointed to a point on the schematic of the ship in front of them. “Here.”

“More problematic, we have a rupture in one of the major power conduits from the front to the back of the ship.” Rush added. “As well as the pre-existing coolant leak in that area.”

Young scanned the schematic.

“The conduit is here,” Brody said, zooming in and running his finger along a line, “and this is the cold area that we had closed off with the coolant leak here.”

“So what is our next move?” Young asked., looking up at Rush.

“We need to reroute power away from that conduit.” Rush said. “Then fix it. To do that though, we’re going to need to fix the coolant leak.”

Brody nodded. “Once we’ve done that, we can start trying to fix the shield emitter and the hull.”

Young scanned the schematic again, recognising the area from the previous disaster of a mission there.

“It’s gonna be really hard to do it though.” Eli said. “There’s no atmosphere in there, there’s leaking coolant fluid and there’s probably no gravity, or like really low gravity, if there’s no power to the whole area.”

Brody nodded.

“It’s lucky we’ve got six suits now then isn’t it gentleman.” Rush added, with the twist of his lip that was almost a smile.

Young gave him a look. “Always looking on the bright side aren’t you Rush?”

“You know me so well Colonel.” Rush replied. “Well, lets get on with it then, we have a power conduit to bypass.”

Young stepped away. “I’ll go back and report the news to Homeworld Command. I’ll be as quick as I can. Don’t start anything further without me.”

“Of course.” Rush said. “We couldn’t do it without you.”

“Or without sarcasm.” Young noted.

Rush just chuckled and Young left.

xxxoooxxx

By the time Young got back from Homeworld Command, Scott was able to inform him that Rush and the science team had diverted the power such that there was no energy leakage, but the shields were still down.

“If we redirect it through there,” Eli was saying as Young re-entered the Core Room, “we can get these four shield emitters back up.”

“Presuming that that section of conduit is also intact.” Brody replied.

“Yeah.” Eli nodded. “We could send a low charge down it, see what happens? It’s not like we can go out there and take a look.”

Rush let out a huff of breath, then looked up, spotting Young.

“Telford and his scientists will be here tomorrow to help you.” Young told him.

“Just great.” Rush snapped. “Just fucking great!”

“Hey, I did my best.” Young said. “But I can’t actively turn them down when it genuinely appears they’re offering to help. At least two of them have zero-G experience though, so even if you just get them moving stuff and welding things they’re an extra couple of sets of hands.”

Rush did not look mollified at all, but gave him a sour look and went back to the console.

“I’m going to brief the crew.” Young said.

“You do that Colonel.” Rush muttered.

xxxoooxxx

Rush woke in the night, bolt upright in terror, sweating and shaking. The feeling of muddy water against his face had morphed into visions of blue glass, water and claws which still floated in front of his mind’s eye. He wiped his face with his hand, feeling it coming away dripping.

He reached out and grabbed the canteen of water by the bed, uncapping it unsteadily and taking a swig. He put the cap back on and lay back in the bed, canteen still in his hand, waiting as his heart rate and breathing came back down to a normal rate.

It would have been long past the point Young had gone to sleep by the time he had left the Core Room, and he had stumbled back to his own quarters, aware that Young would no doubt be taking Rush’s own bridge shift the next day as well as his own. Exhaustion weighed heavy on him, but they had finally managed to partially reroute the power from the conduit and get another six shield emitters online as well as closing up the leakage of power and making the area possible to enter. Rush lay there, drained and worn and eventually sleep claimed him again.

He woke panting, struggling against the covers, face wet, throat hoarse and dry. He fumbled in the bed for the canteen again, dragging it out from a fold of the blankets, uncapping it and gulping down a few mouthfuls not caring as water spilled over his chin. He deliberately slowed his breathing, making it calmer and deeper, although it shuddered as it drew slowly in and out.

Rush's eyes slammed open at the sound of a scream which drowned out the clicking of the aliens in front of him. The soreness in his throat made him realise the scream he had heard was his own. He blinked in the darkness, shaking and terrified and it took him almost thirty seconds to really grasp he was in his quarters.

He couldn't stay in here, couldn't be here alone. He rolled out of bed, his clothes were drenched and he caught up the black under vest and boxers and made for the nearest bathroom. He pulled off his wet sleepwear, relieved himself then used his t-shirt, doused in what was left in the canteen to wipe the sweat from his body. Once he felt cleaner shrugged into the under vest and boxers.

He couldn't go back to bed. Not again. Couldn't take the visions of claws, medical equipment, blue glass and cold metal. It wasn't cold in here but he was shivering. Christ this was ridiculous, he was too old to be afraid of nightmares, too old to be scared of the monsters in the darkness. But they were waiting for him, waiting for his eyes to close, muscles to relax and sleep to drag him down into another terrifying vision.

He let his feet lead him, creeping through the deserted corridors like a ghost, bare footed and still shaking, soaked clothes in his hand. The door opened under his hand, waking Young who blinked at him, coming up to awareness fast as he realised something was wrong.

"Rush?" he said, sounding confused.

"I'm…" Rush faltered, not knowing how to explain how something as simple as nightmares had reduced him to this. He gave up, stepped into the room closing the door behind him. "Nightmares." He said shakily, dropping the wet clothes.

Young looked at him, then twitched the covers back. "Get in."

Gratefully Rush slid in, moving into the warmth. Young flung an arm over him.

Despite being in Young's bed Rush's sleep was still restless and he tried unsuccessfully to relax enough to sleep, trying not to toss and turn too much. Young in his customary, and in the current circumstances damn annoying way, simply wrapped arms around Rush, tucked his head into Rush's neck and went straight back to sleep. Rush lay there hoping the warmth that Young was radiating would relax him enough to sleep.

Young woke as an elbow caught him a glancing blow in the ribs. He rolled backwards away from the attack, off the bed and to his feet in one move. Rush was still yelling and lashing out in his sleep, incoherent and terrified. He lunged forward and grabbed the man by his upper arms, giving him a swift shake.

"Rush!"

Rush struggled and yelled, beyond a nightmare and into night terrors. Young had seen it before in soldiers with trauma.

"No!" Rush's voice was hoarse.

"Nick!" Young shook him again harder and Rush's eyes slammed open, wide and terrified. "It's me."

Rush's breath was coming in hard panicky pants, muscles shaking and his face and hair were soaked with sweat and tears. He hauled Rush to sitting and into his chest, wrapping arms round him and realising as he did so, Rush's undershirt was soaked through with sweat. Rush slumped against him until he began to breathe more normally. As Rush finally pulled back, Young caught the hem of his top and hauled it up over his head in one go, dropping it in a soggy mess by the bed. Rush looked askance at him as he turned back to where the man sat next to him.

"You could have wrung that out." Young said. "It was soaking through onto me. More blue alien nightmares?"

Rush nodded. "They tend to come in a bunch." He whispered apologetically. "I can go back…"

"No." Young cut in. "It's fine. I…"

I'm responsible, he wanted to say. I left you to die and they captured you and tortured you. I wake myself at night with visions of you unconscious on the dirt.

"It's fine." He said again. "Stay."

Rush shuddered and Young realised he was damp and sitting in his underpants, no wonder he was cold. He reached for him and pulled him down to the bed, dragging the covers back up, pulling him towards him. Rush shuddered again as he wrapped himself round the man, and he could feel how chilled Rush's skin was already.

"I'm sorry." Young said without thinking, almost into Rush's ear.

Rush pulled his head back. "What for?"

Young stared at him helplessly. Christ, he couldn't say it. "Just…sorry." He said.

Rush stared at him, Young began to feel uncomfortable. Then just when Young was on the verge of pulling away, Rush's hands tightened on his shoulder and back and he kissed Young firmly before leaning back again.

"Apology accepted." Rush's voice was still unsteady.

Rush hauled him in again, Young could feel Rush's heart thumping in his chest still as Rush pulled his face down to kiss him hard. The kiss didn't end like the others had though, and then Rush's tongue was dipping between his lips. Young started, then as Rush's lips and tongue became more insistent Young allowed his lips to slip open against the concerted assault and Rush was pressing and exploring Young's mouth insistently with his tongue.

Rush's fingers tensed in his shirt and reflexively Young ran his hands upwards, one skating up Rush's shoulder blade and the other sliding over Rush's chest, and he suddenly realised how naked Rush felt under his hands. He pulled away from the kiss.

"You're so warm." Rush breathed, accent thick and voice breathy.

"What are you doing?" he panted.

"Forgetting a nightmare." Rush's voice was still tense. "All I can feel is cold and claws."

Goal oriented, always so goal oriented. Rush leaned in again, kissing him, tasting him. Young let him, let Rush push him back into the bed, trapped against the pillows as Rush chased sensation to drive away the dream. Rush's fingers were digging into his hip and gripping his shoulder rhythmically. He found himself responding, tongue pushing back to dip into Rush's mouth, hands rubbing up and down Rush's spine, massaging fingers into Rush's bare back.

Rush was lying across his body at an angle, chests pressed together, but hips side by side, which was good as involuntarily Young's hips tightened slightly upwards and his fingers clenched into Rush's shoulders. The tightness pooling in his groin was disturbing and somewhere he was not prepared to go. He was not meant to react like this. He pushed Rush away a little, panicky, feeling the continuing tension in the man.

"I can't do this." Young told him gruffly.

Rush rolled back and moved away, the covers falling away from him.

"I'm sorry." Young said. "I…"

Rush sprawled out on his back. "It's fine." He said.

It wasn't fine. Young sat up and looked at him, guilty. He was getting turned on but on the other hand it was obvious from Rush's position and state of undress that it had just been a kiss for him. He put a hand on the other man's shoulder. Rush looked at him and Young saw his face close down, expression tightening to an emotionless mask. Damn, he knew what Rush needed, it was just touch and closeness to take away the memory of claws and cold.

"Roll over." He said abruptly. Rush blinked at him. Young reached over him and grabbed the arm on Rush's other side, pulling and rolling Rush towards him, over onto his front. He had done this before, this he could do.

He reached out to the counter for the tub of TJ's medicated hand cream, opened it and scraped out a dollop, warming it between his hands. He straddled Rush's butt, sliding the waistband of his underpants down just a little. Rush craned his head round to look up at him, as Young settled his weight evenly across his buttocks and upper thighs so as not to crush him.

Rush sighed and his head relaxed back onto the pillow as Young ran his hands down his spine, then back up, fanning out over his back to spread the cream. He started with Rush's shoulders, pressing thumbs and fingers into the muscles, squeezing and manipulating, feeling as Rush relaxed into the bed. Rush's skin gradually warmed under his hands and his breathing evened.

He continued working over Rush's back, pushing Rush's hair up and out of the way, systematically massaging into every muscle from the base of his spine to his neck until the man was softened and almost boneless under his hands.

Rush’s skin was soft and smooth where the cream had soaked in. Young found himself rubbing over it just for the tactile sensation. Rush hummed in pleasure as Young just stroked the palms of his hands down Rush’s back. Young caught himself, hands stopping as the ran outwards over the smaller man’s hips.

He took a deep breath and finished by catching up another handful of cream and smoothing it down Rush's arms, taking his hands one by one and rubbing cream into them manipulating each finger pressing his thumbs in between the knuckles and into the palms, along the fingers still a little marked from the frost bite, the slightly paler patch where he had worn the splint.

He finished, sitting back on Rush's thighs. Rush's eyes were half closed, face calm, breathing even.

"Better?" He asked.

"Mmm hmm." The affirmative noise from Rush was sleepy.

Young lay down next to him, throwing a leg over and pulling up the covers. Rush mumbled something. Young leaned in. "What was that?"

But Rush was practically asleep, and Young gave up, turned the light out and wrapped round him to keep the warmth in. Much warmer like this, he thought, and slept.

 


	35. Frigidity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Work starts on the cold area, and tension arises.

Rush saw Young tense as Telford walked onto the bridge.

"Everett!"

"David." Young's greeting was polite but held no enthusiasm.

Rush toggled the radio to the suits on the console. "Eli, what's that left of you?" He asked, adding a little urgency to his voice.  "No, down a little. No, down...not more left. Yes, that crack there..."

Young's attention had snapped to the screen in front of him again and Rush moved sideways a little with a glance at Telford, the invite to stare over his shoulder implicit. Telford wandered straight over. Bloody Telford.

Eli was examining the crack. It was nothing. Rush knew it was nothing, just a surface mark on the casing, but something that would keep them examining it for a minute and attract Young and Telford's attention. These repairs were routine, Closing off coolant conduits, patching or replacing and turning them back on again. Rush could practically have done this in his sleep. If he was honest Brody could have too. Eli on the other hand was far too distractible and Scott simply had no idea what he was doing. At least Barnes and Atienza were focussed which was a small mercy.

Eli rubbed at the mark with his gloved hand and it smudged across the casing.

“It’s nothing.” Eli reported. “Just a mark. Lucky cause I didn’t want to have to replace this one as well!”

Rush turned back to Telford.

“Colonel Telford.” He greeted him neutrally.

“Rush.”

Unsurprisingly Telford did not accord him the respect of his title in return, but Rush ignored the slight.

“I understand you have brought some scientists with you.” He said.

Telford nodded. “Mr Brody was clear about the experience and skills you wanted to support this round of repairs. I allowed him to select his preferred candidates from the available pool.”

But Brody got an honorific. And got his pick of the scientists. Interesting. Maybe he’d have to send Brody back to deal with Telford more often. It would save him having to  deal with the man and Brody seemed to have more success getting what Rush wanted from Homeworld Command.

On the other hand there was a good chance that Telford was just trying to either irritate him by getting on well with Brody, or trying to suborn Brody’s loyalty from Rush and Young.  Rush did not really care. He did not think much for Telford’s chances in converting Brody to his point of view, Brody, like the rest of the crew, had a vested interest in staying alive. Telford’s pursuit of getting the Destiny stargate to form a wormhole back to Earth at the real risk of damaging Destiny and his more recent interest in knowledge about Destiny which he quite evidently put before the health and comfort of the crew were unlikely to win him many friends.

Brody was back on Earth consulting with scientists who had worked on the Antarctic Outpost and Atlantis. Whilst it was effectively a colony, designed to house a few thousand crew, Destiny was above all a research vessel and the area around the cold  zone seemed to be largely devoted to this. If they could establish what some of it was,  based on what they had seen elsewhere, their knowledge of the general interests of the Ancients and any historical records that could be found of the Destiny programme, it could make repairing the area and bringing it back online much much easier. It could also potentially give them research facilities of their own.

Rush was very interested in the possibility of actual research facilities. He personally was a mathematician. What he really needed for that, he already had on Destiny; space to write on the walls and access to a really large computer at intervals. However, better medical facilities, the ability to conduct true assays of ores and minerals, better sampling of food sources, these and many other opportunities would make their lives a lot easier and make Destiny a truly viable expedition, rather than a refugee camp.

Rush put the thoughts from his mind.

“Fine.” He replied to Telford. “Eli’s party will be there for another two hours before they have to return. Colonel Young?” Rush at least was going to retain his manners in the face of Telford’s disrespect. If nothing else it made Telford’s rudeness all the more obvious to the other crew members on the bridge.

“Yes?”

“Could I borrow Sergeant Greer to give Colonel Telford’s scientists some training on the workings of the suits?” He turned back to Telford. “They are dissimilar enough they’ll benefit from some safety training and practice in them before I assign them anywhere risky.”

He saw Telford bridle at his statement that he, not Telford, would be making the assignments.

“Sounds like a good idea.” Young said. He picked up his radio. “Are they waiting in the mess hall?” He asked Telford, then at the affirmative nod, called Greer to deliver the promised training.

xxxoooxxx

The second shift were in the cold zone undertaking repairs. Eli’s team had returned and after the suits were refreshed Rush, Greer and two of Telford’s scientists, an engineer named Olatunde and a scientist of indeterminate discipline called Wilson had taken over. They were removing a section of power conduit and in theory would replace it with a section culled from elsewhere in the ship.

Young was still on the bridge. Calvos and Chloe were manning the two main consoles as Destiny made it’s slow way through real space. Young sat in the captain’s chair, watching what was going on with the repairs on a kino feed and absolutely not having flashbacks to Rush’s last experiences in the cold area.  The hatch hissed and Young looked up as Telford walked over to him.

“I thought you were in conference with Camile.” Young said.

“We finished.” Telford replied shortly.

“She gave you a full crew report?” Young asked.

“Yes. Apparently things are going very well.” Telford shifted forward towards Young. “She was very positive about the cross disciplinary training that’s happening.”

Young nodded. “We need more people able to read Ancient and able to undertake basic repairs. On the other hand I need all of the crew to be able to defend the ship.”

Telford leaned further forwards towards him dropping his voice much lower. “She also mentioned you and Rush seemed to be getting on much better. You’d agreed to a lot of Rush’s suggestions for maintenance and repairs.”

Young shrugged. “It was work that needed doing. It looks like we’re in for the long haul here David. We **need** a working ship.”

“So you’ve given up on getting home.”

Telford’s accusation was a little louder than he had intended, judging by the look on his face. Young flicked a glance over at Calvos and Chloe, but if they had heard they were not showing it.

“No,” Young contradicted him, “ **when** it’s a safe proposition, getting the crew back home is a mission objective.”

Telford frowned at him. “When it’s a safe proposition? When who says it’s a safe proposition?”

“When my science team - who are the experts on this ship - say they are satisfied it’s not going to blow us up, **I** will make the decision.”

“So you trust Rush more than me?”

Young huffed out a breath. “It’s not just Rush. It’s Brody’s extensive experience as an engineer, it’s Eli and Chloe taking the figures and rerunning the math, it’s Volker, it’s Park, it’s all of them.”

Telford leaned in further, face harsh.

"What's going on Everett? What's he got over you?" Telford snapped. "You **killed Rush** to save **me** from the Lucian Alliance. What's changed now between you and Rush?"

Young stared at him shocked into silence. He took a few moments to pull himself together and formulate an answer. By the look of it Telford saw his indecision as an indication of falsehood, but he went on anyway.

"David, there's nothing underhand going on. Rush and I have simply agreed on our priorities at the moment. We both know what is important at the moment. We need to fix the cold area."

"Why?"

Everett looked at David. "Why what?"

"Why the cold area?"

"Apart from the fact it just blew out a chunk of the hull and started venting power from a major conduit?” He asked tiredly. “Because the shields are at minimal strength over a whole area of the ship? Because it will allow us access to the second computer core, it will resolve a significant power drain, it will allow us to repressurise and access what seems to be the research hub of the ship. Do I need to go on?"

"Since when do you find research important?"

Young was beginning to get angry with Telford's demands. _Since when do you start fucking my ex-wife behind my back?_ Young reined his anger back in again.

"David, I listen to my science staff. My science staff tell me this is important for several reasons and back it up with evidence. This is not just Rush telling me this. Brody and Eli have made strong cases for this repair schedule also, **independently** of Rush. The lack of shields, the conduit failure and the hull breach are also posing a significant structural risk to the ship as a whole. Even without that, resolving the power drain and the increased medical facilities alone make it a high priority target for repair.”

It looked like Telford was going to interrupt again, but he cut him off.

“This is **my** command, David, you don't have to like all my decisions, but you are damn well going to have to live with them. I also don't appreciate your insinuations that I am open to coercion or that there is anything that Rush could hold over my head like this. Back off David."

The last words were cold steel bordering on anger.

Telford took a step back. “This discussion is not finished Everett.”

xxxoooxxx

Young was sat in the mess hall, spooning soup slowly into his mouth. It had been a long day, it had started too early and he was carrying the tension of it all in a tight band of pain across his shoulders.

Chloe walked into his field of vision.

“Can I talk to you, Colonel?”

He gestured tiredly at the seat opposite him. “Be my guest.”

“Uh, it’s just that Colonel Telford stopped Rush when he had finished unsuiting and started suggesting…” Chloe paused.

“I can guess.” Young said.

He stood, pushing the soup away. “Finish that.” He said to her. “No point in wasting it. I’ll go see what’s happening.”

“I left Eli there.” She said worriedly.

“It’s okay, I’ll sort it out.”

He left and walked towards where he knew the staging point for the work crews was. Before he was even close he caught up with Telford coming in the opposite direction, his face a mask of fury.

“What do you think you are doing David?” Young snapped out.

“I was having a conversation with Rush.”

“Which appears to have gone **very** well.”

“Rush was as obstructive as he always is,” Telford ground out, “and flatly refused to give me a report on progress.”

“After a five hour stint in one of the suits undertaking manual work?” Young said.

“Mission feedback is standard operating practice.”

Young looked around. “Come in here, I am not having this discussion in the corridor.”

He opened the door of a vacant room next to them and walked in, Telford walked past him and he toggled the door lock.

“Rush is a civilian,” Young turned on David, “he is over fifty, he only had major heart surgery about a year ago and is **still** recovering from hypothermia and a broken hand. Do you **really** think he’s going to be in any condition to talk to you after five hours of manual labour in a suit? Be real David.”

“If he’s that much of a liability he shouldn’t be undertaking the work.”

“I don’t care what you think, Rush is the expert on Destiny’s systems and the best person to lead the most dangerous tasks like refitting high strength power conduits that **I don’t want to explode again**. Leave my crew alone David. They aren’t the crew we expected here, but we’re making the best of a bad situation, and the last thing we need is you threatening members of the crew.”

“Rush?!” Telford asked in disbelief. “Like he cares.”

“In front of Eli and Chloe who do care.” Young said. “I didn’t hear it from Rush. I heard it from Chloe.”

“Rush was being obstructive.”

“Rush has worked openly and constructively with the science personnel you brought with you this time David. You brought the right crew for the job and they’ve got further towards collaborative working than any of the scientists you’ve brought before. Don’t mess that up.”

“Chloe is barely a member of the science team.” Telford countered.

“Chloe is working on the same math as Rush and Eli, and you don’t want to discount her political connections. She wasn’t just a pretty face back home, she moved in high circles and still has a lot of friends.”

“Who don’t know where she is.”

“Her mother does.” Young said flatly.

The door alarm sounded. Young walked over and opened it. Camile waited outside.

"Colonel Young, I’m sorry to disturb you, but Airman Velasquez said he saw you going in this direction and this was the only locked room." Camile looked from one to the other. "If I'm disturbing anything I can come back later?”

"I just finished bringing David up to date on the work plans." Young said. "We're done now. What was it you wanted?"

Young walked out of the room, leaving Telford  and shutting the door behind him

“Chloe told me what happened, I thought you might need an interruption.” She said quietly.

“Good call Camile.”

xxxoooxxx

Young strode into the core room. "We need to talk."

Rush looked up, as did Eli and Volker, who both ducked away nervously. Rush stared back at him and there was a few seconds of tension before Rush stepped back from the console and stalked past Young out of the room. Young led him into the small conference room next door and shut the hatch, turning as Rush collapsed into one of the chairs.

“Why did I have to hear from Chloe that Telford was getting in your face?” He demanded.

“It’s just Telford being an arse.” Rush made a dismissive wave of his hand.

"This is a relationship." Young said. "We have a relationship, which means you have to talk to me."

"Does it?" Rush's voice was cold.

"Well it was enough of a relationship that when I forced you to think about it you went off and injured yourself rather than face up to it. Enough of a relationship you didn't mind me kissing you."

"And where do you get that from?"

"The fact that you didn't complain." Young said quietly. He leaned forward. "You could have complained immediately, but you didn't it was only when you thought about what it meant you came and shouted at me, and then rather than face up to it you ran off and smashed your hand into a wall."

Rush stood.

"No, you don't get to run away from this." Young stood and took a step sideways, to stand between Rush and the door.

"What, are you going to stop me leaving by force?" Rush demanded.

"No." Young said. "I don't need to."

Rush stepped forward went to brush past Young. Young reached out, caught him by the arm and used Rush's own momentum to swing him round and back into Young's arms. Young's mind threw up a concept from high school science and pilot training.

"Centripetal force." He murmured and kissed Rush, wrapping his arms round Rush's shoulders. Rush went rigid for all of five seconds. They seemed very long, before suddenly he softened and began to kiss back gently, an arm sliding around Young's waist as his lips played gently over Young's. Young pulled back, looking at Rush expecting sarcasm but evidently Rush had made one of his lightning fast changes of mood and was looking at him curiously.

"You actually know some physics." Rush said with an amused expression. "I'm impressed."

"Space pilot." Young said. "They make you learn stuff, Newtonian mechanics, stuff like that."

Young was hyperaware of Rush's hands, one now sliding up to his shoulder blade, the other on his hip, the thumb just slipped under the edge of his shirt on bare skin.

"So you're trying to impress me with your scientific ability." Rush asked.

"Something like that." Young said. He shifted his weight so his arms were more settled round Rush. "Talk to me Rush."

Rush sighed. "What is there to say?"

"If it wasn't the gay kiss that bothered you, why was it that you punched a wall?"

Rush looked away, face creasing with a frown. Young waited watching emotions play across Rush's face.

"Intimacy doesn't come easily to me." Rush said finally. "That stepped over the line from one thing to another." There was silence. "Space pilot. Is that an official job designation at the SGC then?"

Young laughed. "Yeah definitely." He grinned. "They have to teach you different stuff when there's no down." He said.

"What are we doing?" Rush asked him. "You appear to be enjoying dragging me into a situation where there's no way to work out what's up, down or any other direction."

"I don't know." Young admitted. "I really don't know."

"So why do you keep kissing me?" Rush asked.

"I guess…" Young's brain flailed wildly for a way to explain himself. "I guess like you said, it's the intimacy. It kinda just seemed right. Close, you know?"

"We've certainly been getting close for the last few months."

"Yeah."

He kissed Rush again gently. "It's been a long time since I've been this close to anyone," he admitted, "it's kinda…" He searched for the word.

"Intoxicating." Rush said.

He leaned forward a little more and simply pressed his cheek against Rush's, feeling beard, warm skin and cheekbone press against his own cheek. Rush's long bangs tickling his nose.

"Yeah." Young said into Rush's ear. "Damn. This is weird."

"Shut up Young." Rush said. "I don't want to talk about it." He pulled back again, dark eyes bright and his gaze intense and kissed Young. "But it's not unpleasant."  He murmured.

They kissed some more, long seconds of the gentle press and movement of his lips over Rush's and the reciprocation thereof, before Young pulled back. "I don't wanna do anything…"

"I know, this is fine."

"'Kay."


	36. Telford and concessions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Repairs continue and Telford is not entirely without his uses

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter, but hey, I'm writing again!

It was a further six days before the work crews, even augmented by the scientists and engineers from Earth, were able to repair all of the major leaks to the conduits. Even with that done, the area was still open to space and Rush’s latest report to Young was not positive. Young sat staring at it, open on the laptop screen in front of him. Rush was clear that whilst they had sufficient hull panels to at least stabilise the hull, if not fill the whole of the rents in the hull caused by the exploding conduit, the shield emitters were a completely different matter.

He had a series of reports all on various issues in front of him. Rush’s was an overview report, with suggestions for priority issues to focus on, it was accompanied by a concise report about the star system they had finally arrived in from Volker, a very professional report from Brody about the structural integrity of the damaged area and a rather less professional but very expressive report from Eli about shield strength.

Young was aware that there were burned out shield emitters across the hull, meaning that most of Destiny’s shields were stretched thinner than they should have been. With the damage incurred recently, Eli’s report, backed up by Brody and Rush’s reports, was that should they meet an aggressive space-faring race or even a large dust cloud, they “were toast”. Eli may not be Hemingway or Whitman but his written word did still give one a very good mental image of the likely outcome of such an encounter.

Young sighed and sat back in his chair. The reports together all made it clear, that until they could get the shields to a safe condition, they were going nowhere. He checked the latest food report from Becker. The situation wasn’t bad, not enough that he needed to consider rationing yet, particularly not now they had two hydroponic areas up and running, still he was keeping a close eye on consumption.

They never quite got a break, he reflected. Two steps forward and three back again. He signed off on Rush’s plan for hull repairs while further investigation was done on the shields, agreed Volker’s plan for more detailed scans of the system they were in with a view to asteroid mining, and sent an email to Becker, telling him to cut the meat rations down to minimum levels. There, now all he had to do was talk to Telford.

Telford was in the gate room, looking at the only gate that was within range, right at the extent of Destiny’s gate connection range. It was locked out.

“David.” Young greeted him.

“If we unlocked this gate that Destiny’s made unavailable,” Telford said, “we’ve got a chance it’s in range of other gate which might be more useful.”

“Destiny locks out gates that are dangerous.” Young replied, watching as Telford scrolled through the details available.

“I know.” Telford lifted a kino. “But it can’t hurt to take a look.”

Young considered a moment. “Fine. I’ll get Rush to unlock it and you can send a kino through and see what’s on the other side, but I’m actually here for something else.”

Telford finally looked up from the screen.

“I need a pilot to accompany Volker. He’s taking one of the shuttles out to survey the system. We need to know what’s retrievable. He says there’s some minerals and metals which are in quantities and places too small and inconvenient for the seed ship to pick up. He needs a co-pilot for the surveying. With any luck, we’ll pick up some of the rarer resources the science team are saying they need.”

Telford stepped away from the console. “What’s the final aim of this?”

“Ideally, fixing up our access to the computer systems.” Young replied, wishing Telford would just shut up and get on with it. “At the moment, we don’t have ideal access to Destiny’s major control systems, short of using the chair. Rush and Brody are theorising that if we can get the computer systems they’ve identified around the cold area back up and running, we’ll gain more control over Destiny.”

Telford nodded, his face thoughtful. No real surprise there, Young thought.

“It has the additional benefit of allowing us to identify any water and atmosphere resources.” Young continued. “We’re in a good situation at the moment, but Destiny and the seed ship have capacity to store more, so while we’re stuck here I want us to pick up as much as we can, give us a wide margin of environmental security.“

Telford nodded. “Fine. When is Volker scheduled to go out?”

“Four hours.” Young replied, relieved the other man wasn’t going to argue. “You’ve got time to send an exploratory kino through first.” The concession wouldn’t cost him anything.

Telford looked surprised. “Good. Very good. I’ll find Rush.”

Young snorted. “Best you find Eli, he’s on break from repair work and he’s the handiest with a kino. I’ll get Rush to unlock your gate.”

He turned and left before Telford could get another word in.

 

xxxoooxxx

Rush was glad that Olatunde and Wilson had turned out to be at least reasonably trustworthy and that they both got on well with Brody. Wilson had worked with Carter on a number of projects and had a knack for problem solving that worked well with Olatunde and Brody’s practical skills and knowledge. Consequently, he had been able to turn over the hull repairs to them, whilst he, Eli and Chloe went through the shield systems and tried to identify the components that made up each shield emitter.

After the best part of a week, they had a working schematic that he was reasonably confident about. Chloe and Eli were currently going through the boxes of spare components from the storage, trying to identify what they had spares of and find any reference codes, names or parts labels that might help him identify the parts in the manufactory’s list of components. Even once he had worked out what to ask the manufactory for, it was hit or miss as to whether they had, or had access to in this star system, the minerals needed in order to make them.

Finally, a real use for Volker, surveying the star system and its planetary bodies. It had only taken a few years.

He looked up as the door hatch hissed open and Young walked in.

“I’ve got Telford to go surveying with Volker.” Young said without greeting him.

“I can’t think of a better person to get off my ship and confine in a small environment with Volker.” Rush muttered, turning back to the screen.

“But I need you to unlock the locked out gate.”

Rush looked back up at him again with a scowl. Young just raised an eyebrow.

“Telford wants to send a kino through.”

“Even though Destiny thinks it’s a bad idea.”

Young nodded in agreement. “He has an idea that though the planet itself might be unsuitable, it may give us access to better planets if we’re stuck here for any amount of time.”

Rush snorted.

“He has a point.” Young replied. “Enough of one I’m willing to humour him.”

Rush gave a one shouldered shrug and turned back to the screen. HIs long fingers moved over the screen.

“Done.” He said.

“You never know.” Young said, resting his hand on Rush’s shoulder. “He might find something useful.”

The look on his face didn’t look confident of that fact though.

 

xxxoooxxx

 

Rush was already half asleep when Young slid into bed next to him, but the press of Young’s icy cold feet against his ankle woke him with a grumble.

“What has Volker found so far?” He asked.

“Rhodium.” Young replied.

Rush looked interested.

“I thought that would get your attention.” Young said. “He think’s it’s retrievable, and there’s a good amount of it.”

Rush nodded.

“Volker says he’s also found chromite and a decent and reasonably abundant source of copper.”

That made Rush smile and Young smiled back.

“What’s the seed ship doing since it left the gas giant?”

“Mining olivine.”

“Olivine?” He queried.

“It’s a mineral which can be used to sequester CO2,” Rush said, “which is always a good thing for us to have.”

Young nodded, feeling reassured by this. Since their early problems with lack of good air, CO2 sequestration was an area of science he had deliberately paid attention to when it came up, for obvious reasons.

“It’s also useful for casting metals.” Rush added. “But I suspect Destiny is more interested in its ability to potentially support our environmental systems.”

“So,” Young tucked the covers up around them both, “I get the rhodium, you’ve all been talking about needing platinum group metals, and the copper is obvious, but why is the chromite so important?”

“It’s a source of chromium. Destiny uses chromium in alloys for a variety of things, alloying steel, refractory materials in high temperature situations, it’s used in the power conduit systems. The seed ship will probably need to use it once I’ve worked out which components to ask it for to replace the high tension conduit systems.”

Young settled down against Rush.

“Good.” He said.

Rush wrapped an arm around his waist. “This is what Destiny’s crew is meant to be doing.” He said quietly. “Surveying, investigating, retrieving, testing, rebuilding, repairing.”

“We’ll get there.” Young said, and reached out and turned out the light.

 

xxxoooxxx

 

“So, what do we know?”

Telford leaned forward over the table. “The planet has a hazardous level of solar radiation. It’s got some vegetation which looks adapted for hot, dry exposed environments, but very little shade.” He said, pulling up the data the kino had sent back to them. “However, a half hour period of exposure, suitably protected from the sun shouldn’t prove dangerous long term. That’s long enough to go through and see if there are any other planets within range of the stargate there.”

Young looked at the figures quickly before Telford brought up the kino footage. The planet was incredibly bright, with plants bearing a strong similarity to cacti, mosses or lichens and what he remembered his grandmother keeping and calling “living stones”.

Young nodded. “Fine. Take Barnes and Volker and a security team. Take samples of the vegetation for Doctor Inman and Doctor Park’s hydroponics team.”

Telford nodded and left.

xxxoooxxx

 

“There are two other gates in range of the stargate.” Volker said. “One has a gate on a very low lying island, which appears to be part of a chain of similar small islands. We’d have to do further investigation to see what there is in the seas, but the islands are just rock and black sand.”

Young sat back in his chair. “And the other?”

“Has sparse vegetation, scrub type environment, some kind of animal life, although it was a way off and we didn’t get a good look.” Telford said.

“More importantly,” Volker added, “the kino picked up some kind of electromagnetic emission.”

“Originating from what?” Young asked.

Volker shrugged awkwardly. “We don’t know.” He waved the kino remote a little vaguely. “Not without further investigation and readings.”

“But?” Young pressed.

“It might mean the planet is inhabited.” Volker said. “Thought whatever it is is a long way from the gate.”

Young looked at them both, then took the kino remote to look at the information on the planets.

“Fine. We’ll send a team to investigate both planets.” He looked at the data on the screen in front of him. “I need Brody, Olatunde and Wilson to keep working on the hull, Eli, Chloe and Calvos can keep running the sensor readings on the system. Telford, you and Volker and your team can take the ocean planet. I’ll take Rush, Greer and a team to take some readings on the scrub planet. Scott will take command of Destiny.”

“You’re leaving the ship?” Telford asked.

“Yes.” Young said bluntly. “I’m ready to actually see a sky. If either planet proves safe and suitable we’ll be sending all the crew in shifts for shore leave. I’ve had it impressed on me by Lieutenant Johansen and Doctor Macarthur that all of the crew need time on planet, including myself, to ensure sufficient vitamin D and promote good mental health.”

Telford nodded. Young pulled his radio out.

“Rush.”

There was a brief pause.

“What is it Colonel?” Rush’s voice was typically irritated.

“Get ready for a trip to a planet. Volker has discovered some electromagnetic radiation readings which might indicate potential inhabitants.”


	37. Falling down

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The planet around the gate area was a scrubby landscape of yellow-grey limestone, heavily weathered by water with deep canyons marked by accretions of debris where the canyons turned. It did not bode well...

The planet around the gate area was a scrubby landscape of yellow-grey limestone, heavily weathered by water with deep canyons marked by accretions of debris where the canyons turned. It did not bode well.

The foliage, what there was of it. looked very similar to that on the world which they had transited through to get here, just larger. Even Rush could guess that the evident presence of water would enable faster growth. Presuming the cactus plants - cactus trees more like - on this world were the same, it suggested some artificial means of their arrival, adding evidence to the suggestion that the patterns of electromagnetic radiation he was monitoring were also artificial.

He was vaguely aware of the soldiers returning from their patrol around the area. He agreed with them that it definitely looked like a path. Still, deer created paths in forests. It didn’t mean that deer were sentient beings. Though deer probably wouldn’t have bothered to create a path specifically to pass the stargate.

The clouds that had been accumulating to the west of them were now a solid wall of grey hugging the range of high hills or mountains which marched in a north-westerly line away from them. The ground rose as the landscape moved away towards the hills, which dominated the horizon on that side. To the east and south it flattened into a plain.

The stargate itself was situated about 40 metres from a cliff face which descended steeply into a deep ravine. On the other side there was a more gentle slope before a less steep slope into another valley also obviously cut by water but seemingly of a slightly darker colour of stone. He could see the bands of sandstone in the valley sides.

He turned back to the little screen he was holding, hunching his shoulders a little as the wind picked up a little. The signals were still displaying what appeared to be a random pattern, but it was between a very narrow range of values and was constant. It definitely did not appear a typically naturally caused pattern.

He didn’t really notice as the clouds drew in over them, but the rain beginning to land on his head and shoulders caught his attention. He pulled up his collar and looked back down at the screen, trying to establish whether what looked like a repeating pattern really was.

Even through his tight focus on the data, Rush heard the shout and the rumble and scrabble of rocks. He spun to see the edge of the cliff continue to crumble away for another few moments. Rain was still driving into his face and for a second his brain didn't catch on that Greer, Barnes and Dunning were still in front of him, but Young wasn't.

He could see the edge crumbled away and before anyone could stop him he was dropping the remote, skidding across the wet ground, slipping and leaning to see over the edge. Down below him, on a slope of crumbled dirt and rock was a tumbled doll, black clad limbs sprawled inelegantly. He dropped to sit on the edge and let himself down over it, suddenly skidding as his legs went out from underneath him, slipping and sliding as he tried to stay upright, staggering and stumbling down the slope. He could hear shouts of alarm behind him, but now he was moving there was no going back. He overshot his target by a few steps but skidded to a stop. He turned back and moved to where Young was lying on the ground.

“Damn!” He said looking round.

Rivulets of water were running down the sides of the narrow canyon they were in and the bottom of the canyon was rapidly becoming a fast flowing stream.

“Wake up!”

He didn’t want to have to move Young, but if what he thought was going to happen came to pass, well, you could just take it as read that he really did not want to be in this canyon. He pinched Young’s earlobe, his brain throwing up from somewhere that was a way of rousing an unconscious person, though he had no idea if it was true. Young groaned.

“Thank fuck!”

xxxoooxxx

Young came to to a world of pain.

“We have to move.” He squinted up at the face hovering over his. “This is going to hurt a lot but we absolutely cannot stay in this canyon.”

The face swam a little with the pain as Rush, it was definitely Rush, took his arms and pulled them up over his shoulders.

"Hold on. Don't let go."

Young wrapped his arms around Rush's neck. He had no idea how Rush lifted him, but lift him he did, all that wiry strength and bloody-mindedness combining to lift Young into his arms. The rain continued to drive into them and Young found himself turning his face into Rush's collar as Rush walked stolidly up the path up the side of the canyon.

With every step Rush took Young's ankle and knee screamed in pain, but as he lifted his head slightly at a loud noise, he saw what Rush had been talking about as a wall of filthy water suddenly slammed through the canyon just below them. Splashes of filthy water spattered him. Branches of the strange cactus like trees, rocks and other debris tumbled over and over in the deluge. Unable to manage the pain, the feeling of horror that swept through him and the concentration to keep hanging on Young buried his face in Rush's neck. All he could do was simply concentrate on not letting go, on trying not to scream or pass out when the jolting of Rush's steps ground the broken bones in his ankle together.

When Young managed to look up again they were probably twenty metres above the surging water. Rush's steps were slow and laboured and as Young panted, breath coming fast in response to the searing agony in his legs, Rush stopped.

"This is gonna hurt." Rush warned, and his legs collapsed.

Young braced himself to hit the floor, but Rush turned into the collapse at the last minute, folding at the knees and going down backwards. He landed on the pack on his back, one arm lifting Young's legs away from the floor as Young felt himself thump down heavily into Rush's abdomen. Rush exhaled as all the breath was crushed out of him. Pain drove stars into Young's vision and everything whited out for a while.

"Fuck" Rush wheezed, struggling for breath.

Young looked at him weakly from where he was collapsed over the other man.

"No way I can do that again." Rush panted. "Fuck."

Young could feel the sweat running down between his shoulder blades, weirdly noticeable considering the pain in his legs and the rain running down his face and soaking his clothes.

"Dry." He managed to get out. "Emergency blanket....pack."

He did scream, unable to hold it in, as Rush hauled himself slowly and carefully out from underneath him. As Young's weight hit the dirt floor underneath him his foot slipped and he faded out again for a few seconds. When he came round, everything was darker and green. Rush was crouched over him, wincing and flexing his arm as if in pain. He was close in front of Young and green light from a glow stick was reflecting back from the metallic inside of an emergency blanket onto Rush's face in a weird way. Young realised he was propped up on a back pack and Rush was crouched over his lap, his head holding up the blanket as a make shift tent over them both. A quick sideways glance showed him it was held down around them with rocks and the other pack.

The rain was loud against the outside of the plastic sheet. "Now we wait out the rain and hope your soldiers come and get us." Rush said.

"What..?" he managed to get out, confusedly.

"Your soldiers." Rush repeated undoing Young's jacket.

"Eh!?" Young protested, struggling feebly.

"First aid you idiot." Rush snapped. "You bounced down a slope. I can see the cut on your head and I don' think it's too bad."

Young looked at him vaguely as Rush started checking him over. His ribs hurt when Rush pressed them on one side and two fingers turned out to be painful. Apart from that he was covered in gashes and grazes and bruises in the process of coming out in shades of red and purple. Rush found one of TJ’s first aid kits in the bag locating some clean bandage and wound wash of strong herb infusion in salt water.

Young gritted his teeth and tried not to scream as Rush cleaned his injuries one by one. He turned his head to bite down on the collar of his jacket as the antiseptic was sluiced over his cuts, groans the only noise that escaped him as Rush systematically worked over him. All through it the rain hammered down on the outside of their makeshift tent.

Young zoned out for a while after Rush had finished cleaning him up, only aware of the throbbing of his injuries and the noise of the rain outside. It took him a sentence or two to realise Rush was talking.

"I have to get you under cover." Rush was saying urgently into his ear. "The rain isn't letting up and I don't know when we're going to get rescued.

Young forced himself to concentrate. "How will they find us?" He managed to get out through the pain.

"Spare Kino remote." Rush said. "In my pack."

"Not sure if I can make it."

"Don't have to make it. Shut up, I'm gonna carry you. Just don't die on me."

"Not gonna die."

xxxoooxxx

Rush packed everything back into the pack and waited for a few minutes until there was the slightest let up in the rain. As quickly as he could he pulled the emergency blanket down and stuffed it haphazardly in a side pocket, then swung the pack onto his back. Young let out a pained groan as Rush lifted him again and then blessedly for him, blacked out. Rush struggled with the dead weight of his body for a moment and the stabilised his balance. There was nothing for it but to move, find shelter, and for Young's sake Rush hoped that it was close. 

Rush wasn't sure how far he walked, stolidly putting one foot in front of the other, trying to keep his path from drifting down into the canyons where the risk of flood water was greater. He was beginning to notice some dimming in the light, though he was too tired to work out whether it was increased cloud cover or approaching dusk, when a dark opening appeared ahead. The cavern was not deep and was barely high enough for Rush to stand, but was largely dry and several meters above the high water level. Rush staggered inside and collapsed to the gritty floor.

xxxoooxxx

 

"Don't let me go." Young's voice was hoarse with pain. "Please, don't let me go." 

The voice startled Rush out of the vague exhausted semi-trance that had overtaken him. He looked down at Young and could see the fear in his face. Despite his drift back into consciousness it looked like he was struggling to focus and there was an unhealthy flush to his skin.

"'S okay." Rush said, trying not to shiver. "'M not going anywhere."

There was a scrabbling sound at the entrance to the cave and an animal face appeared in the cave. The creature had no eyes, but the head, or at least the front end of it swung towards them and stopped, as if it was looking at them. Rush scrabbled his hands down Young's side making him cry out, reaching for his sidearm, fumbling with the holster as the creature started forward.

It leapt as Rush yanked the gun out, Young screamed in pain as he was jerked further onto Rush's lap. It was too late, it was too late, the gun swung up, it was too late, it was...

The sound of the shot was startlingly loud in the small cave. Ichor, foul and greenish sprayed across both Rush and Young and Rush closed his eyes against the slime as there was a loud thud. He rubbed his sleeve across his face to clear his vision and looked.

The creature was apparently dead. What he assumed was the head was gone, shredded by the bullet through the face. The creature's six legs were motionless and the body sprawled out at odd angles. He was panting as if he had run a mile and his hands shook.

"Fuck!" he muttered. "Fuck!" He looked down. "Young?" There was no response from the other man. "Young?"

He could feel panic making his heart race and his already laboured breathing speed up to hoarse pants. He reached down to shake the other man. There was no response, but he realised that Young was still breathing.

"Don't you dare die on me, don't you even fucking think about leaving me alone on this fucking planet." He shook Young again, eliciting a groan and bent over, to speak directly into his ear. "We are not done, we are not fucking done Young!"

There was another scrabbling by the door and Rush sat up, bracing the gun in both hands as another one of the monsters crept in. This time he got a better look at the creature's blind face, an almost circular mouth surrounded by fine tentacles, skin covered in plaques of harder texture and clawed toes to all six feet. It evidently sensed them as the tentacles fluttered in their direction and it took a step forward.

Rush shot it in the face and it went down but outside the door there was more scrabbling of claws on rock.

 


	38. Admission

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The rescue party arrives, admissions are made to the medical bay, and to others.

TJ had not felt like this for a long time. Her medical pack was strapped to her back, but in this moment she did not feel like a doctor, she felt like a soldier again. Armed and armoured, the gun was a solid weight in her arms and she could feel the straps of the body armour shifting as she moved. They were retrieving their people.

"We're getting them out TJ." Greer's voice was low and firm. "We are getting them out." His tone brooked no argument.TJ hefted her pack on her back, watching as Greer watched the kino display.

"North." He said. "They're about half a kilometre north of here."

"How did they get that far?" TJ asked. "You said the Colonel fell down a cliff."

Greer looked at her. "I got no idea, but the other kino remote which was in Rush's pack is half a kilometre north of here. Maybe the Colonel ain't with him?"

They stared at each other for a moment as the rain pounded down around them, then by silent mutual agreement left that train of thought well alone.

“Look, it ain’t the way the water was going,” Greer said. "Let's work with what we got."

TJ nodded. Not washed away at least.

The terrain was difficult, the yellowish dirt and sand was rapidly becoming waterlogged and they slipped and slid as they made their way towards the single blinking red indicator on the kino remote's screen. Several of the gullies were completely flooded, forcing them to backtrack and they were wary of approaching the edges of them for fear of losing more personnel to a fall.

xxxoooxxx

Rush was tired, so tired. There had not been any more of the creatures for what he thought was around an hour, but he did not dare let his eyes close. The second to last creature had crept in while he was trying to check over Young who was still unconscious, able to get close through his inattention and under cover of the noise of the rain. He looked down at Young, still sprawled into his lap, and tried again, shaking him gently, then pinching his earlobe hard.

"Mmmph?" Young made a noise then let out a groan, tight with pain.

Rush was simply relieved he was still alive. He leaned forward, craning his body over to get closer to Young.

"I'm still here." He said directly into Young's ear. "We're going to get out of this."

Young opened his eyes and weakly turned his head upwards to try and focus on Rush. Rush almost bent himself in half leaning down and pressed a hard kiss to Young's lips, then he looked up and went back to staring at the entrance way again. The gun with it's last two bullets resting on Young's shoulder, Rush tried to stay alert while the rain hammered down outside and moisture dripped down the walls.

xxxoooxxx

It was a parody of the pose they had held when she had found them in bed, Young curled into Rush's lap, Rush's arm over him. But instead of a book in his hand Rush had Young's sidearm and was pointing it at TJ and Greer, shaky with exhaustion.

There were another two dead creatures in the doorway, three more on the floor and a final one about five feet in front of Rush and Young. The "head" of that one looked like it had been shot at close range - there was nothing of it left - and TJ could see that Young and Rush were splattered with the yellowish ichor. There was also a lot of blood from somewhere.

"Doctor Rush?" TJ called quietly. "It's TJ."

"TJ?" Rush blinked and the gun dropped although he did not put it down, his outstretched arm resting on Young's shoulder.

His other hand was reflexively tensing and relaxing in Young's hair, although Young did not respond in any way.

"We've come to get you. I need to get Colonel Young on a stretcher so we can all go back to Destiny." She took a few cautious steps forward, then when he did nothing, walked over to him and took the gun from his unresisting hand.

"It's going to be okay, Doctor." She told him.

"He has a broken ankle, three probably cracked ribs, concussion and a couple of broken fingers."  Rush's voice was exhausted, so quiet as to be almost a whisper.

"We'll get you both back." She said quietly before turning to the entry. "Bring the stretchers in here." She ordered Greer.

It appeared Rush had undertaken some basic first aid on Young already. She checked him over, redressed the wound that was oozing through it's bandage and left the rest for Destiny and better hygiene. They moved Young carefully from Rush's lap to the stretcher. He came round a little as they moved him, moaning in pain but seemed groggy. Rush did not seem to want to let go, but once Young was safely installed on a stretcher she let Greer and Barrass carry him off and she and Marsden manhandled Rush onto the second.

Rush did not acquiesce willingly, even though he looked like crap and could barely stay awake. TJ estimated as Rush and Young had been on the planet for just over 36 hours and they had arrived on the planet at 10pm Destiny time courtesy of the time differential. Rush had probably been awake for over fifty hours. No wonder he was out of it. Leaving Rush to be carried back by Marsden and Dunning she hurried to catch up with Young's stretcher.

xxxoooxxx

Young's injuries were extensive, Rush had been right about the broken bones, she was forced to get Varro to help reset his ankle, and used some of her precious supply of local anaesthetic, not wanting to give him anything stronger unless she had to. She was able to reuse Rush's hand splints for the fingers, and was exceedingly grateful when Brody arrived with tools and materials and made splinting for the ankle to her direction.

Rush refused to sleep. She could hear Cole and Chloe trying to coerce him to rest throughout most of Young's treatment, but every time she looked up, he was watching the proceedings from where he was slumped on a nearby bed. Young's treatment complete, she sent everyone else away except Cole, asking Camile to try and retrieve Susannah from Earth, and moved to check Rush over.

"Are you okay?"

He blinked at her uncomprehendingly, but submitted as she stripped him out of his shirts and pants and checked him for damage. He was freezing cold and covered in bruises and scrapes but seemed unharmed. When she finished, she realised he was still watching Young.

"You have to sleep." She said. "He'll be fine, I'll watch you both." Rush ignored her and she sensed he was beyond reasoning with. "You want the bed next to him?"

Supporting most of his weight, she managed to get him to move two beds along to the bed next to Young. He collapsed on his side facing the unconscious man. TJ walked over to her limited pharmacy and made a very weak sedative tea adding a generous amount of sugar syrup and cold water to bring it down to drinking temperature.

"Doctor Rush?" He looked at her. "You need to drink this cup of hot tea."

She supported him to drink the tea and took the cup away to rinse it. By the time she returned he was sound asleep, curled on his side facing Young. She covered him with blankets and left him to it, pulling the screens around them.

Twenty minutes later Susannah arrived. She checked Young over and listened to TJ's account of the treatment.

"You did well."  She reassured TJ.

TJ sat back and listened while Susannah went over things she needed to look out for and things that she should do later, finally feeling the adrenaline beginning to ebb.

"And now," Susannah told her gently, "you catch a couple of hours sleep and I keep watch."

Gratefully TJ laid herself on one of the spare beds and was asleep in seconds.

She woke when Chloe arrived four hours later. Susannah looked over as TJ swung her legs over the edge of the bed and sat up.

"I'm glad you're awake." She told TJ, "I really need the lavatory and I could do with something to eat."

TJ smiled. "My shift then." She said. "Chloe can keep me company."

Susannah nodded. "I won't be long."

Susannah left and TJ went to splash her face with water.

"TJ?" Chloe called. "I think he's coming round."

TJ walked over to the bed and looked down at Young. His eyes opened slowly.

"Hey." She said, resting a hand gently on his shoulder. "How are you?"

Young blinked at her, confusedly.

"You're going to be fine." She reassured him. "I've put your foot back together and there's no sign of infection. Susannah is here too."

He seemed to be gathering himself slowly. She waited patiently, there was no point in hurrying him.

"Rush." He said. "Where's Rush?"

"He's asleep. How do you feel?"

"Rush." Young said again.

TJ allowed her eyes to flick up to Chloe who was looking at Young a little confused. She reached out and gripped his uninjured hand gently. He tipped his head slightly in response and made eye contact with her. She stepped back so he could see Rush in the next bed.

"He's fine." She repeated. "You both made it out okay. He's in a much better condition than you were. You didn't leave anyone behind."

This appeared to mollify both Chloe and Young, whose eyes had already begun to close at the word 'okay'. She patted his hand and drew the covers up.

She chatted quietly with Chloe for a while, Chloe had been roped into Eli's latest entertainment plan, a weekly "radio drama" featuring the vocal talents of a half dozen crew members playing a considerably larger number of characters and neatly sidestepping the need for costumes or sets that a video drama would. It sounded fun, and new entertainment was always welcome. They talked until Susannah came back half an hour later and Chloe made herself scarce when Susannah found a bed and got some sleep herself. TJ settled back at the desk to write up her treatment record.

TJ heard Rush moaning in his sleep and walked over. As she neared the beds he came awake with a panicked yell, staring around him. She stopped, waiting quietly. He evidently did not see her as he looked around and immediately his eyes lit on Young. She watched as he slid out of bed and took the two steps over to Young. He stared down at the man and she realised Rush's breath was coming fast as if he'd been running or, more likely, having a nightmare. He pushed Young's messy curls back off his face, before climbing up on the bed.

"Hey." She said quietly.

He started, and looked over, slightly guilty expression segueing smoothly into a more baleful look as if he did not have the energy for a glare.

"Not really enough room in there for two." She said. "Not with his broken leg."

He got down turned his back on her and slid back into bed. She walked over. He still looked drained and groggy and as well as the scrapes she had cleaned earlier she could see a series of dark bruises coming up visible around the edges of the tank top. He was favouring his right hand and she suspected that the recoil of the gun held while sitting in an awkward position had jarred his wrist.

She walked over and looked down at him. "I'm staying here and I'm staying awake. I need to make some medicines up anyway. I'll keep an eye on you both."

He rolled so he was facing towards Young and his eyes drooped. TJ went back to her desk.

She busied herself with making the medicines, starting an alcohol infusion of a root from the plains planet which would eventually form the basis for mouthwash and making a strong decoction of a bark that was a powerful anti-fungal. Rush woke with a cry three more times in the next hour and a half, startling her and waking Susannah. The first time TJ gestured  to Susannah that it was alright and went over to check on him, but after getting his bearings and checking on the Colonel he simply curled back up again. He did not look like the sleep was actually giving him much benefit though.

Again the second time, Susannah squinting at her as she walked over, she checked on him, but again, he sat up, climbed off the bed, looked at Young then went back to bed and fell asleep. The third time she just listened, heard him get up, check Young and then get back into bed again. She nodded at Susannah, who smiled and dozed off again. TJ contemplated giving him a dose of something to knock him out, but decided against it; everything was quiet over there behind the screens and had been for a little while and she needed to get the decoction bottled while it was hot.

Scott walked into the infirmary. "Is the Colonel awake yet?”

Unable to look up from where she was decanting a decoction of crinkle bark from a jar to a variety of repurposed screw top shampoo bottles TJ responded with a negative "uh-uh". She poured the last of the liquid carefully into the last bottle, careful not to disturb the light sediment in the bottom of the jar, and careful not to get any of the blue-green liquid on her hands. It was an excellent treatment for most fungal infections, but tended to dye the skin a bright greenish tint.She looked upwards at the sudden inhalation of breath. Scott was standing in the gap between the makeshift infirmary screens, staring at Young's bed. TJ put the jar down careful and walked over quietly. "Sssh! You'll wake them."

While she had been busy Rush had moved and was back on Young's bed again, lying next to him on the side with the unbroken leg and intact ribs, arm wrapped around the other man's neck above the broken ribs, and now sound asleep. TJ sighed.

"What?" Asked Scott quietly in a very bemused voice looking from the tableau on the bed to TJ.

TJ paused a moment then prevaricated "What do you expect, Rush spent 36 of the last fifty plus hours keeping him alive, I'm not surprised he's feeling a little concerned."

Scott gave her a look. TJ sighed and forced herself to remember that Scott might be several years younger than her and look like a dumb kid, but he'd managed to make it to 1st Lieutenant on his own merits.

"Come over here." She said gesturing to the far side of the room past where Susannah was asleep on a bed.

Scott followed her over. She leaned on a bed, wondering where to start. She gave up trying to find an easy way into the conversation.

"They're having a relationship." She said.

Scott looked at her. "You're kidding me right?"

"No." She said tiredly. "No I'm not. They're having a relationship. Have been for a few months from what I can gather. They keep telling me they aren't but they keep ending up sleeping together."

Scott stared at her, absolutely speechless. "How did it start?"

TJ shrugged. "I don't know how, but apparently when is on the volcano beach planet, when you were sick."

"Wow." Scott fell silent obviously struggling to take it all in. "I didn't think they were gay." He said finally. "Like, they were both married."

"I don't think they think they're gay either if that helps." She said.

"But they're sleeping together."

"Sleeping," she stressed, "actually sleeping."

"Well I guess it explains why Rush threw himself off a cliff after the Colonel." Scott looked back over to the screens and back again. "So how long have you known, and does anyone else know?"

"About a month and Eli knows too. He caught Young telling Rush it was late and he ought to come to bed. I think Doctor Macarthur has guessed."

Scott nodded, then after a moment grinned. "You know what the oddest thing about that is?"

TJ shook her head.

"The idea that anyone is brave enough to tell Dr Rush it's his bedtime."

TJ stifled a giggle. "Yeah. Definitely."

They both tried to suppress the laughter that threatened to erupt. Once it was under control again Scott nodded thoughtfully. "Kinda explains a lot though. Like all the times I thought the Colonel was having a tough time and then he suddenly wasn't, and the same for Dr Rush, like when Chloe told me about Dr Rush losing it at the science team, but then the next day he was fine."

"I think they're looking out for each other." TJ agreed. "It doesn't always work, but it seems mostly positive."

"This is very weird." Scott said. "Well, if he wants to keep it a secret then we keep it a secret."

TJ nodded, she didn't have to ask who “he” was.


	39. Messages from space

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> “Even if Telford puts pressure on you from Homeworld Command?” Camile asked.  
> “It’s not as if Destiny is going anywhere without us doing these repairs is it?” Rush countered.

Young woke. Everything ached. His leg was throbbing but in a dull way that suggested he had been given some serious painkillers. He felt fuzzy and unfocused, it was hard to think, but then TJ's current painkillers tended to have that effect. There was a heavy weight, warm against the side of him that was uninjured or at least less painful and he didn't have to open his eyes to know that it must be Rush, despite the fact that they were in the infirmary.

He opened his eyes. The infirmary was dim, nighttime lighting. Their beds were surrounded by screens, the one they were on and the empty but untidy one next to it that had obviously been Rush's.

Rush was wrapped around him. He had limited memories of what had happened on the planet. He remembered falling, Rush and the makeshift tent and had vague memories of a cave and gunfire. The gun fire must have been Rush. The arm around his neck shifted, but did not slacken, and the fingers slipped beneath his shoulder where Rush was pressed against him twitched, but Rush didn't wake.

Young sighed, wondering how far the cat was out of the bag now. With any luck only TJ had seen them. Rush snuffled into his shoulder and Young could not help but smile down at him. Maybe it was the fact he was dosed up on pain relief, but the sleeping mathematician snugged up against his side gave him a warm feeling of contentment. He rested his head back against the pillows. It would be sensible to sleep whilst the pain relief was still working. And whilst he was warm and comfortable. He let himself drift back into sleep.

xxxoooxxx

Rush woke with a jerk that forced a pained groan out of Young, although when Rush opened his eyes he could see that it had not actually woken Young. Carefully he slid off of the bed. He took couple of steps over to the bed that had been his and sat on the edge.

TJ appeared around the edge of the screen.

“You’re awake.”

“Yeah.”

“How do you feel?”

“Like death warmed up.”

TJ chuckled. “No surprise there then.” She glanced at Young. 

“How is he?” Rush asked. 

“Okay, mostly. He’s got a badly fractured ankle, broke a lot of the bones in his right hand, three cracked ribs and a bad concussion. He’s probably damaged his knee more, but it’s hard to tell past the large number of general scrapes and contusions.”

Rush frowned, looking past her at Young, still asleep on his bed. 

“You’ll be keeping him in here though?”

“For some time. He won’t be walking for a while.”

“Crutches?”

“Brody’s already making some, but that’s a while off yet. He couldn’t even use them with the damage to his hand. Eli’s going to make some sort of smaller kino-sled for him, instead of a wheelchair.”

Rush nodded. “It won’t stop him being in command though?”

“As far as I can tell, not at all. On the ship, even in a wheelchair - kino-sled,” she corrected herself “shouldn’t make much difference.”

Rush looked reassured. “Can I go?” He asked.

“Once I’ve checked you over, there’s no reason you have to stay. 

xxxoooxxx

Rush made it out of the infirmary in time for lunch. He had managed to get away with only his wrist strapped up from where the recoil of Young’s gun, fired at a less than ideal angle had damaged his already weak wrist. The bandage was actually helpful, though that did not stop him complaining the whole time that TJ had been applying it to his wrist.

As soon as he sat down at a table with his plate of food in a quiet corner of the mess hall, Camile and Greer were joining him. 

“How’s the Colonel?”

Rush tilted his head to look up from his plate at Greer.

“He’ll live.” He said.

Greer’s face froze. 

“He’s going to be fine.” Rush clarified shortly. “He’s got a few broken bones, ankle, hand, ribs, an’ a concussion, but TJ and Dr Macarthur say he’s going to be fine. He’s just goin’ to take a while to recover. Won’t be on his feet for a while.”

Greer’s breath hissed out in a sigh. Camile was nodding in relief in the background.

“What is it?” Rush demanded.

“Colonel Telford has been here.” Greer said, quietly but angrily. “Questioning the Colonel’s decision to take you both off the ship.”

Rush frowned. “How do you know?”

“He overheard me talking to Telford.” Camile said. 

“What’s Telford doing now?” Rush asked.

“He’s gone back to Homeworld Command. I told him if he had a problem he needed to take it up with General O’Neill.”

“Good.” Rush took a moment to eat a couple of mouthfuls of food. 

“We’re going to need to have a consistent front while the Colonel is unavailable.” Camile said. 

Rush nodded as he chewed and swallowed. “Well, my point o’ view, we have our orders from the Colonel, there are long term science projects under way repairing the ship. I’m not changing anything.”

“Even if Telford puts pressure on you from Homeworld Command?” Camile asked.

“It’s not as if Destiny is going anywhere without us doing these repairs is it?” Rush countered. 

“But if the focus moves back to another attempt to gate us back home?”

Rush scowled shaking his head. “Destiny is in no fit shape to manage something like that.” He said categorically. “The coolant leak, the conduit blow out, and the fact out shields are shot to shite? Putting that much pressure on Destiny’s systems at the moment would be a mistake. Potentially a fatal one. We’re not even in a position to refuel in a star.”

Camile looked worried. “We can’t refuel? I thought it was just we couldn’t get to a suitable star?”

Rush huffed a breath out in irritation. “The same shields that protect us while we’re moving are what stop us being cooked to a crisp in a star.”

“So how long do we have?” Greer asked. “To get the shields working?”

“Not moving we use a lot less energy.” Rush said. “My rough calculation is a month or more.”

“What about the seedship.” Greer asked.

“This star isn’ the right kind and the seedship we’ve got has no interstellar capability without Destiny.” 

Camile shrugged. “Just let us know what we can do. I’ll liaise with Lieutenant Scott and set up a command team briefing this evening.”

Greer nodded. “That ain’t that long though, a month.”

“It’s not as if we’ve got any other options now, is it?” Rush sighed.

 

xxxoooxxx

The command briefing over and done, with Rush made his way to the Bridge. Chloe, Barnes and Varro were there. Chloe was in the command chair.

“Any news?” He asked. 

“Colonel Telford came back.” Chloe said. “But Dale needed a pilot, Scott can’t leave the ship with the Colonel injured, and Greer is working with Brody and Dr Olatunde on repairing one of the damaged bulkheads.”

“What was important enough to get Telford off the ship?”

“A seriously large quantity of metals.” Chloe pulled up a display on the panel in front of her. “There are a couple of asteroids that are mostly made of metal that he’s interested in. Also, this planet has aluminum. Quite a lot of it.”

Rush blinked. That  _ was  _ a serious quantity of metals. “Okay, that’s...impressive.”

“I know.” Chloe agreed.  

“What’s the seedship doing?” Rush reached over her arm to manipulate the display..

“Mining.” She replied, shifting sideways so he could reach the screen better. “Iron and nickel from another big metallic asteroid.”

Rush nodded as he pulled up the manufactory work queue. “Hull repair supplies.” 

The seedship was quite happily mining what it needed to make hull panels and the manufactory had put the workqueue he had set it on hold and was solely making hull repair supplies. Rush left it to its own devices, there was nothing more important than the hull at the moment. 

“Ah, Doctor Rush?” Barnes asked. “I’ve been seeing this on the screen for a while now, and I think I’ve worked out it’s a signal.” She squinted at the screen again. “From another ship. It’s sending us a message.”

Chloe shifted out of the command chair immediately and Rush slid in, pulling up displays even as he sat himself down. The communications menu was not something that they used regularly and it took him a moment to find the appropriate commands. 

He began to laugh. Chloe looked at him strangely. 

“It’s another seedship.” He said. “It’s on it’s way to us now. It’s just come within full communications range and it’s talking to Destiny.”

“Why is it coming here?” Chloe looked at the star map hologram Rush had pulled up. The seed ship was clearly travelling towards them.

“Power.” Rush grinned. “It’s bringing us power.”


	40. Forward reserve

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _The eureka moment came rather unimpressively, after a good night’s sleep in Young’s bed and a quite reasonable breakfast._

The seedship was five days out, but was within range to have a full exchange of data with Destiny. This seedship was completely intact, barring a few minor problems from millennia of use. Rush felt positively gleeful.

As well as having fully charged in the nearest suitable star in order to bring power to Destiny, Seedship two was bringing a selection of other materials including water and some more metals and minerals that looked like they were probably destined for the power control systems.

Chloe, Barnes and Varro had agreed not to mention the seedship to anyone until he had had a chance to discuss it with Young, or at Barnes’ insistence if Young was not out of the infirmary within two days, with Scott and Camile. Rush had argued the need to keep the information under wraps whilst there were so many unknowns, and whilst Telford was around but had finally ceded the argument when Chloe weighed in on Barnes’ side. Barnes had stated bluntly that if Rush did not agree to this she would simply tell them herself in two days time. Rush had been quite impressed with Barnes’ ability to argue with him to be honest. He was definitely stealing her for the science team, she was wasted as a soldier.

He had ceded control of the Command chair back to Chloe and was in the Core room, reviewing the annotated plan of Destiny’s systems. Whilst he and Young had been out of commission, Brody and his team had fully patched the leak in the cold zone. Now they had to move on to the power conduits, the power that the Seedship was bringing was useless if it could not be transferred successfully to Destiny.

He sat there and worked through the plans tracing the lesser conduits that they had identified back to the larger ones, but his mind kept drifting. Finally, with a huff he stood and made for the infirmary.

Susannah was sitting behind the counter, crushing something in the recently made mortar and pestle.

“Nick.” She greeted him. “You’re up late. How is the wrist.”

Rush shrugged flexing it slightly. “Aches a little.”

“Here to see Everett?”

Rush scowled.

“Oh hush.” She chided him. “You’re allowed to care about your friends,” she smirked, “and there’s no-one here to see you. He’s going to be fine, we’re pretty certain now. He’s asleep.”

Rush walked over to Young’s bed. He still looked a mess. His hand was strapped up in the splints that had been made for Rush himself, his leg immobilised in something similar and his face was heavily bruised. Rush ran a finger down Young’s cheek, feeling the scuff of his stubble against his fingers.

“You better be up and about soon.” He murmured. “I’m not keeping this ship out of the hands of Telford wi’out you.” He gave a rueful smile. “And it’s just too quiet wi’out you to argue with.”

He stayed for half an hour or so before leaving, but rather than making for bed, wandered back to the Core room.

Something about the schematic was bothering him. The conduits were a series of closed systems which linked into Destiny’s main power cells. Whilst it was possible to open connections between systems, a redundancy in case of damage, the default setup was that there were separate power conduit systems for the various areas of the ship and some systems had their own power connection. Not all areas of the ship or ship’s systems needed power at the same strength, so this made sense for those with differing requirements. Down the centre of the ship were two high tension power conduits.  
  
As he stared at the plan again, he realised what it was. The high tension power conduits which ran down the core of the ship were not connected to the docking assembly for the seedship. He checked it again. No, the docking assembly was not connected into the high power conduits from the main power reserves at all.   
  
So how the hell did Destiny and the Seedship transfer power?

xxxoooxxx

Rush watched Young from where he stood just outside the door, out of sight of most of the room. Young was sitting on a bench, the leather and metal cast strapped round his leg up on a box and his splinted hand resting on the table next to him. He had evidently finished his food, put his spoon back in his bowl and was staring vaguely across the room. Young's expression was a little wistful and Rush realised there was a good chance he was staring at TJ.

Young had been kept in for observation for a further forty eight hours after Rush had escaped. He had spent the first twenty four of those largely unconscious due to painkillers, and the second twenty four mostly arguing with TJ and Susannah about whether he should be allowed to work. Rush would not have admitted to having dropped into the infirmary several times each day if asked, but his mind had kept turning back to Young throughout the day and the night.

This morning, the medics had finally agreed to release him, but with some heavy conditions. Unable to put any weight on his foot, and with his hand damage preventing him using crutches, he was not mobile at all at the moment and he would not be fully mobile for weeks. Eli’s “kino sled” idea had been repurposed to a “kino-chair” and Young had been forced into it.

After a significant amount of argument and Susannah-enforced lunch in bed, Young had finally acquiesced and floated out of the infirmary in the direction of the Bridge. Rush had made his way to the core room to catch up with Volker about the next stage of the mining he was proposing and had not seen him since.

Cole walked out of the mess hall forcing Rush to walk in unless he wanted to look suspicious. He walked up to the counter where he took the plate that Becker held out, not looking at what it was, and turned to look for a seat. Young was watching him expectantly, and Rush walked over and sat next to him, trying to glance round to see what he'd been looking at. It wasn't TJ, she wasn't here.

"You weren't at the meeting earlier." Young said.

"I was busy." Rush said.

Young regarded him. "I would have thought you'd want to be involved in the conduit repair?"

Rush shrugged. "Brody's more than capable of it." He said dismissively. "It's more an engineering issue."

Young gave him a momentary suspicious look then leaned in a little with a smile. “I haven’t had a chance to thank you.”

Rush turned away. “Nothing to be said.” He poked at the ‘stew’ on his plate. “What is this?”

“Hotpot.” Young said. “It’s actually got meat in.”

There was a pause while Rush sampled the food and found it edible. He looked back up. “I’m…glad, you’re....” he paused, “not dead, I guess.”

“I’m glad too.” Young agreed. “Could have put a crimp in my lifestyle.”

Rush snorted.

Young gave him a gentle shove with his shoulder.  “At least my damn knee is getting a rest.”

Rush could not help but chuckle at that. He schooled his face back into a more serious look and dropped his voice. “We need to talk.”

“What about?”

Rush looked around and dropped his voice to a whisper. “I have an update on our power situation. Come down to the small conference room and I’ll show you.”

“So,” Young asked as Rush pushed his kino-chair into the core room. “What’s new?”

Rush closed the bulkhead door behind them and sat down in a seat by Young.

“We have another Seedship on it’s way.”

Young started in surprise.

“Who knows?” He asked. “You’ve evidently kept it a secret.”

“You, me and Chloe, Barnes and Varro who were on the bridge. It was Barnes who saw the communications trail between Destiny and the seedship.”

Young shifted his shoulders then leaned in again. “What’s it coming for?”

“It’s bringing us power.” Rush said. “It refuelled in the nearest appropriate star and it’s coming here to dock with Destiny and refuel us.”

Young could feel himself relax. “That will give us weeks of power.” He said. “And if it can refuel and come back, it will mean we can continue to repair Destiny at a sensible rate until she’s spaceworthy again.”

Rush nodded. “We could also possibly transfer a small crew onto her to investigate what gates are available from the star that she’s refuelling in.”

Young nodded back thoughtfully. “And you don’t want to tell Telford or Gutierrez because you think it will start them off on another round of attempting long distance gate travel.”

“Which at the moment is tantamount to suicide.” Rush said sourly. “I’m working on understanding the power conduit system. We still don’t really understand why the other Destiny sustained damage while she was attempting to dial out in a star.”

Young frowned. “The ship was handling too much power which overloaded the systems.” He said.

Rush scowled. “Typical simplistic response. There are hundreds of potential questions that we need to ask before we start messin’ around with that level of power flow again!” He snapped. “Which systems overloaded? Which power conduits were not strong enough to manage the power flow? Were they not strong enough because they were too old and damaged, or because they were not designed to take that amount of power?”

Young put his hands up in surrender. “Yeah, of course. So,” he sat back in his chair again, “we need to discuss how we’re going to handle this with David and Gutierrez, ‘cause,” he cut in quickly before Rush could interrupt, “I’m pretty certain that they’re gonna notice the arrival of a third ship.”

Rush tapped his fingers in the table top irritably. “I need more time to understand the conduit system.” He said. “I can’t give you the evidence we need to get them to hold off, unless I understand the systems and the risks better.”

Young nodded. “Telford’s not back for two days and I’m not expected to check in for another four.” He put his hand down flat on the table. “You have two days.”

xxxoooxxx

The eureka moment came rather unimpressively, after a good night’s sleep in Young’s bed and a quite reasonable breakfast.

Rush had begun to manually trace the conduits with coloured highlighting on the plan. He was focusing on the largest, theoretically highest powered, conduits. The pertinent realisation came to him whilst sitting in the gateroom avoiding the rest of the science team for some peace and quiet. Sat on the mezzanine level, legs hanging over the edge and the laptop next to him he looked down at the gate through the rails. It occurred to him suddenly that he had been an idiot of an order of magnitude comparable with Volker.

He was tracing individual conduits out from the main power reserve one by one, not knowing what they were connecting to. What he really needed to do was work backwards. The gate was one of the systems on the ship with the highest power requirements. To the extent of his awareness, the only system that probably took more power than the gate was the faster than light drive. He also knew exactly where the gate was on the plan and understood how its systems worked. He had his Rosetta Stone to understand the power conduits.

“It’s dinner time.” Young interrupted his research several hours later. “And as you didn’t think to join us for lunch, I’m making it mandatory.”

“What?” Rush’s mind took a moment to release his train of thought and to process what Young had said. “I was busy.” He replied, carefully noting his thoughts in a text file. “This is important. I need to follow it through.”

Young chuckled. “I guessed. That’s why I brought it here.”

Rush finally looked up. Young was in his kino chair and was holding a tray with plates on, on his lap.

“Burgers.” He said. “Kinda. Destiny burgers.”

“No doubt Eli was in raptures.” Rush noted.

Young grinned. “Take your dinner.”

Rush saved the file then took the tray Young was sliding towards him one handedly. Young maneuvered the chair out, over the edge of the staircase and level with the floor, so he was able to slide himself carefully sideways off the chair and onto the floor next to Rush.

“So, what’s so important?” Young asked taking his plate back.

“Just work on the power conduit problem.” Rush said dismissively.

Young gave him a long look.

“Give me a chance to eat my dinner and I’ll give you a full briefing,” Rush said, “in your quarters, so I can bring my notes and take you right through it.”

Rush flicked his eyes across at the two soldiers who were chatting quietly whilst they were on duty in the gate room in case of gate activation. Young followed his gaze and then nodded.

“Fine.”

xxxoooxxx

“Okay.” Young said when they had decamped to his quarters. “What’s the secret?” He pulled the kino-chair up to his desk.

Rush pulled up a stool and sat himself down next to Young.

“I’ve been following the power conduits back from the gate. It’s a system I know so I can use it to understand the power systems that feed it.”

Young nodded in understanding.

Rush put his laptop onto the desk in front of them and pulled up the schematic he had been working on.

“There’s something I’m not getting here,” he said irritably, “but I’ve been able to follow most of it. There are high tension power conduits down the centre of the ship.”

He leaned forward and gestured at the conduits which he had highlighted in a shocking pink colour. Young followed his fingers as he scrolled the display and traced the line back to the main power reserve.

“Okay.” Young said again. “That’s the main ship’s battery, right?”

Rush made an affirmative noise. He scrolled the display back in the other direction, forwards, towards the bow of the ship.

“The pink lines stop.” Young noted. “Then you have more pink lines again. Where do they go and why do they stop.”

“Exactly what I’m looking into,” Rush said, “and I think we’ve got a bigger problem to worry about.”

“What’s that?”

Rush scrolled across. “This is the gate.” He indicated a system on the schematic. “And this is the power conduits that feed it.”

Young looked at the specific lines among many on the diagram, which had been coloured hot pink.

“Okay.” He agreed.

Rush traced the lines back to Destiny’s main power reserve.

“That’s the main power reserve.” Young said.

“Exactly.” Rush agreed. “And these conduits marked up like these are the conduits which handle the highest power levels on Destiny. You can see there are similar conduits from the ram scoops in the wings as well.” He scrolled forward towards the bow again. “This, the point where these high tension conduits stop right at the front, is the docking assembly for the seedship. And, like you just pointed out, there’s a gap, between the conduits that connect to the seedship and the conduits that connect to the main power reserve.”

Young squinted at the diagram. “Okay. What’s in the gap.”

“I think,” Rush said, enlarging the map, “it’s another power reserve. A forward reserve.”

Young stared at the map.

“I think it’s broken,” Rush continued. “At least partially. It explains why Destiny is not holding more than 40% of its potential power reserve. It should have two power reserves and one of them is not working properly. Even with the amount of damage Destiny has taken, the low level of power retention didn’t make sense.”

“Is it working at all?” Young asked.

“It’s been working enough to transfer power to and from the seed ship.” Rush said. He spun the diagram to show the underside and the power conduit connections between what he was positing was the forward reserve and the seedship docking array.

“So why would Destiny have two power reserves?”

“Lots of reasons,” Rush said absently, zooming in further. “A back up power source in case the main power reserve had to be taken offline; a separate power source for high risk work; or a power flow manager, like a reservoir to manage inconsistent water flows. That’s why it’s connected to the docking array, to manage inward flow, and why I think it’s connected here.”

He pointed at an area which Young recognised immediately. “That’s the area that blew out, Brody’s team are fixing the conduit and the hull in there. The cold zone. And that’s the area you think is the research labs and secondary computer core.”

Rush nodded. “If they were undertaking scientific experiments or had a highly complex computer array there, if it were me, I’d want a power source which would be at a remove from the main power reserve, prevent fluctuations in power due to ship manoeuvres and gate use.”

“Makes sense.” Young agreed. “So that’s where your problem is?”

“That’s where the problem is.” Rush said. “The forward reserve itself is damaged and can’t hold power consistently. Which wasn’t a problem before as it was still transferring through to the main reserve. But I think that our explosion blew out the control systems that transfer power into and out of and through this forward reserve into the main reserve. The damaged systems which we haven’t got to yet, haven’t identified yet, from the explosion are these here, connected into the forward reserve. It doesn’t matter if Brody fixes that conduit, and it doesn’t matter how much power the seedship is bringing us, if we can’t transfer it to Destiny.”


	41. A Massively Complex Piece of Kit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Both plans and unexpected disruptions move them forward. Camile is surprised.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey people. I'm back after an hiatus of about a year. Un-betaed (sorry) but hopefully it's coherent. It is, happily, a nice long chapter though!

Young sat back in his chair.

“I’m assuming this is a massively complex piece of kit?” He asked.

Rush snorted. “That would be the understatement of the century.” He scrolled the plan forward on the tablet, examining a couple of locations. “It’s also huge.”

“How huge are we talking about?”

“Eighty-three metres long by forty-two metres wide, by nineteen metres deep .” Rush said.

Young nodded. “Okay, then this is the priority project. Who and what do you need?”

Rush grimaced but didn’t look up from the screen. “I need Telford to fuck off out of my way.”

“You don’t start with the easy requests do you.”

Rush looked up abruptly. Young had the distinct impression that Rush had thought he was joking. 

“I’m serious.” Young confirmed. “Who and what do you need?”

“Eli, Brody, Atienza, Olatunde, Chloe, Barnes, Wilson. That’s for starters.” Rush snapped back.

“Done.”

 

xxxoooxxx

 

Young banged the base of his crutch on the floor. It echoed loudly on the metal floor plates and the room fell silent. 

“Thank you.”

He looked around at the military and command personnel clustered into the room.

“Okay,” Young gestured at the screen, “we have a serious problem.”

The assembled crew stared up at the holographic screen Young had pulled up in the small conference room. It was displaying the schematic of the ship that Rush had annotated and highlighted for him.

“Before I go into that, I need to bring you up to date on a few technical issues.”

“Just a question Everett?” Camile asked. “Why are you giving this briefing, not Doctor Rush?”

“Because Dr Rush is with every science or engineering skilled crew member giving a much more technical briefing about the same issue and I’m the only one that’s had the full explanation.”

“Okay.” Camile said. “Thanks.”

“At the moment, Destiny is not space worthy outside of a solar system. Also, with the shields at low power, we’re vulnerable to hits from space rocks. As we’re currently stationary the risk is pretty low and Doctor Volker will be also working on setting the ship’s weapons array to take out any large rocks that do pose a risk. According to Rush’s calculations, we have air for several years. We’re not using the FTL or in system drives so we’re using a lot less power, but we’re using the gate and we’re probably going to need to use it more to access resources and potentially food. The gate is a big drain on Destiny’s power resources.”

He let them take that information in for a moment.

“That’s not new information though.” Camile said. 

“No,” Young shook his head slightly. “I’ve got two new pieces of information for you. One is that there is a second seedship on it’s way to us. It’ll be here in a couple of days. It’s recently charged up in a star and is bringing us power and a cargo of raw materials.”

Young held up his hand to forestall their pleased interruptions, and turned back to the map.

“But, as I said, we have a big problem,” Young continued. “Okay, two days ago Doctor Rush had a breakthrough on the work analysing the cold zone. Since then, He and Mr Brody have confirmed his original hypothesis.”

There was a murmur of comments, but Young talked over it.

“This is the former cold area. Now not so cold.” He indicated the conduits that Rush had highlighted pink on the plan. “This set of pink lines coming into that area is the main conduits from the main power reserve, the yellow thing here, to what they have confirmed is a forward power reserve.”

Young looked back to check they were all keeping up.

“We have a forward power reserve?” Scott articulated what Young could see they were all thinking.

“Apparently so. It’s this smaller yellow thing here, and is an additional power storage facility. Identifying the systems that were damaged in the explosion is one of the things that Rush has been working on for the last few days.” 

“Why didn’t he identify it sooner?” Scott asked.

“Because Destiny hasn’t been using it, it’s not working properly, it hasn’t been for a few centuries apparently. The science team have focused on maintaining the systems Destiny is currently using.” He turned back to the schematic, scrolling it across a little. “You can see that the power conduits then go on to the docking array for the seedship.” He reached out with both hands and gestured outwards from the reserve to zoom in. “The orange shading here is the area that was damaged by the explosion. This here is the origin of the explosion, and this next to it is the control systems that manage the flow of power into and out of the forward power array.” He gestured to the specific part Rush had indicated. “Which took a bunch of damage in the blast.”

“But we don’t use the forward power reserve.” TJ said. “You said it was broken since before we arrived.”

Young nodded. “We don’t. I’m not going to go into detail,” a small ripple of laughter ensued, “but it has been explained to me that this forward power unit is what caused the recent explosion. It is also the piece of equipment which regulates the power flow between Destiny and the seedships as well as with certain other systems. The control systems that are part of the forward reserve are what we use for the transfer of power, water and air from the seedship, it all passes through here.”

Young watched as realisation dawned on all their faces.

“Which is what we’re now relying on for additional power while we fix the shields and hull.” Camile said. “That’s not good at all.” 

“No.” Young agreed. “Up until the explosion it was barely functional, the battery wasn’t holding a charge but it was working enough to transfer power and resources between Destiny and the seedships. Now it isn’t.”

Young waited for the hubbub to die down, finally raising a hand for quiet. Camile spoke into the silence.

“So I’m guessing the science team are having a meeting on how to fix it.” She tucked her hair behind her ear and looked at the schematic again. 

“Yeah.” Young nodded. “Brody’s team have fixed the coolant leak so the main problem with accessing that area is the big hole in the hull and the lack of shields. Rush’s draft plan which he is discussing with the science team involves leaving the shields as they are for the moment. Some of Brody’s engineering team with any other available partly skilled crew will focus on patching the hull damage and then repairing the remaining damaged conduit as fast as possible with minimal supervision. The rest of the science and engineering staff will be focussed on understanding and repairing the forward reserve. As long as we are stationary in this solar system, we can manage without the shields and with an interstellar capable seedship, we can potentially run out of system missions to explore and retrieve power and resources.”

“If that worked out,” TJ said, “we could potentially stay here indefinitely, fixing the ship.”

“It comes down to this. With the shields as they are, we’re dead in the water. We have air for a considerable amount of time, but only have power for a few months particularly if we want to use the gate. We’ve food for a few months, and if we use the new seedship for out of system missions, we can hopefully supplement that. As I already said, we are going nowhere without major repairs and we can’t do those unless we can couple with the seedship. Therefore repairing the forward reserve is our primary project.”

“Okay,” Camile said. “What do they need us to do to support them.”

“At the moment, not too much. We’ll be taking additional bridge shifts to free them up. Chloe will be acting as the general science liaison triaging and dealing with non-repair based issues while the others are busy. Scott and I will obviously be needed to fly the shuttle to move hull parts and potentially to explore this solar system for resources. I’m going to ask Colonel Telford to make himself available for piloting also. Non-science skilled crew-members may be asked to spend additional time on earth to exchange with relevant science personnel.”

“Have you said anything to Homeworld Command yet?” She asked. 

“No, my next order of business is to go back and have a meeting with the General to explain the situation. Brody will be coming with me.”

“Not Doctor Rush?” Camile queried.

“No, Rush says that as an engineer Brody is the best person to explain the structural issues which will need to be undertaken quite quickly so that we can move ahead with fixing the control systems.”

“If we can fix them.” 

Young looked at her. “Yeah, well we aren’t talking about that yet.”

“Should we be?” 

Young took a long look at Camile.

“If we can’t fix them then we will be forced to evacuate the ship.” Young said bluntly. “If we cannot fix the connection between Destiny and the seedships and cannot make Destiny spaceworthy, Destiny does not have the capacity to support human life long term, and we could be talking months rather than years.”

The room exploded into discussions and Young had to bang his crutch on the floor again to call the room to order.

“With the exception of food and life support issues, no other project takes priority over this one.” He stated. “This is the  **only** project.” 

 

xxxoooxxx

 

“I need to go back and brief Homeworld Command.” Young said as Rush gestured him into his quarters.

There was a tablet, a laptop and a kino remote scattered on the bed, evidently where Rush had been working.

“Can you make them keep Telford from butting in on my business every five seconds?” Rush demanded.

Young frowned but moved the kino chair over and transferred himself to the bed following Rush’s gesture of invitation. He kicked off his shoes with his good foot and carefully swung his legs up, sitting back against the wall at the head of the bed. 

“I have an idea.” He said. “If you can get Gutierrez in on the work…” 

Rush huffed at him, but Young continued apace. 

“If you can get Gutierrez in on it, we can potentially sell this whole project to Homeworld Command as long term work towards a gate home plan.”

Rush scowled, taking a step back towards the bed and opened his mouth, no doubt to snap a reply.

“No, listen.” Young cut in before Rush could speak. “The problem with the dial home plan is that it’s all about power flows, you’ve been telling me that enough, and the power flows are screwed.” He gestured at the tablet which was showing what he recognised as Rush and Brody’s annotated plan of the high tension conduits. “So, if we take control of the  _ power flow problem _ ,” he made quotation marks with his fingers as he spoke the words, “then we have control of the dial home project. David can complain all he likes, but as far as Homeworld Command are concerned, we are onboard with the project.” He shrugged. “And we need to fix it anyway.”

Rush nodded slowly, lips pursed in thought. “Are you staying?” 

Young paused for a moment, then nodded. Rush began to strip off his outer clothes. 

“And they’ll believe it, just like that?” Rush’s voice was slightly muffled by the t-shirts he was pulling over his head. “Y’ think so?”

“I can go back and speak to O’Neill, before the briefing with the committee,” Young said as Rush’s face became visible again, “explain that the deteriorating condition of Destiny has made you reconsider and agree the need for a back up plan. I’ll say that discussing the damage with Brody convinced you.”

Rush didn’t reply directly. “You want a hand with those?” He pointed at the oversized BDU pants that Young had borrowed to accommodate his splinted leg.

“Thanks.” Young agreed and Rush helped him strip down to his boxer shorts. 

Young pushed himself up on his hands, lifting his hips from the bed as Rush slid the bedcovers from underneath him. He settled himself in the bed, pulling the covers up around his shoulders as watching Rush set the computers on the surface next to the bed. 

“You reckon you can sell them the story. “ Rush asked again. 

His back was to Young and Young waited for Rush to turn round and face him again before he replied. 

“I think it’s a pretty safe bet. It’s what they want to happen.” He paused and grinned. “And most people don’t hang around when their ship is sinking.”

Rush scowled, but got into bed next to him. 

“Do you think we can fix it?” Young asked quietly.

“Yeah. We can.” Rush turned out the light.

 

xxxoooxxx

 

" _ Everett, if you continue to avoid this issue any more I will have to speak to your commanding officer. I’m not joking here. I need your decision on where to send the money. Emily. _ " 

Young looked at the email on the computer screen. He was confused here. As far as he knew he had sorted out the last of the financial settlement, his share of the maturing policies was sitting unused in a bank account gathering interest. There wasn’t anything else, he had signed over the house to Emily, as he now had enough money from back wages sitting in his account to buy another house outright whenever he wanted. It was not like he had any overheads at the moment. 

He took a few minutes to check his finances, dropped a quick email to his brother letting him know he was still alive and still on a top secret project he couldn’t talk about then went back to Emily’s email message. It still did not make any sense. He browsed back through the email conversation, but the best he could come up with was he was missing an email somewhere. The previous two emails were talking about money from the house and the house was hers.

There was a knock at the door. 

“Come in.” He said wearily, minimising the emails.

Telford walked in and Young tried not to react.

“You weren’t in the briefing.” Young noted. 

“I was busy.” Telford replied. “I had a meeting about something else.”

Young scrutinised Telford’s face. “I’m just going back. Are you coming along now?”

“I’m not going.” Telford said shortly. “Something came up. Personal stuff.”

“Oh?”

Telford gave him a long look, his head slightly tilted. “Nothing to worry about.” He said finally. “I’ll see you in a couple of days.”

“‘Kay.” Young nodded. 

Telford left before he could say anything else. 

Young frowned, combined with Emily’s threatening email he could put two and two together and make four. He took a deep breath and tried to calm down, this visit had been going well until he received the email, Homeworld Command had accepted the work plan readily, and had lapped up Brody’s information about the scheduled repairs. 

Emily was her own woman. She had a right to make her own choices. He repeated it to himself a couple of times but it was useless. He gave up and stalked back to the stones room, teeth gritted. 

 

xxxoooxxx

 

Rush only took a momentary glance at Young as he piloted the kino chair into the Research Lab before he turned back to the console.

“I see you’ve been in touch with the ex-wife again.”

“How do you know I’ve been in touch with Emily?” Young snapped back in a low hiss.

“Because you’ve been to Earth and you’ve come back in a foul mood.” He looked up sideways at Young. “If it was to do with the meeting you’d’ve come and told me already or been closeted with your staff, not sulking on your own.”

Young moved the chair up level with Rush. “I am not sulking.”

“You are,” Rush said bluntly. “You’ve been back for over three hours and I haven’t seen you, not at dinner and not to catch up with what Homeworld Command have planned to fuck up our lives this week.”

Young glared at Rush. “I don’t see how it’s any of your business.” 

His voice was not quite a yell, but enough to startle Eli as he walked in.

“As I’ve said many times before,” Rush growled, “your obsessive behaviour compromises your ability to lead this ship.”

“I don’t give a shit what you think.” Young shouted, pushing himself up to standing, leaning his weight on the console and looming over Rush. “It’s none of your business!”

“You need to get a grip on yourself.” Rush snapped in a low voice. “She’s fucking Telford. You need to get over it so you can deal with the man when he’s here trying to screw us over at every opportunity. The last thing we need is for you to fuck that up.”

Young growled and grabbed Rush’s collar.

Eli left the room at a panicked trot. As the door opened and closed Young caught a quick burst of worried voices but the door had closed before he had a chance to see who was out there.

“Oh for fucks sake.” Rush took advantage of his momentary distraction to yank Young’s hand away from his collar and turned to face him. “Now the whole fucking ship will know.”

“What?”

“Brody and Volker just caught a full eyeful of you throwing your toys out of the pram.” He snarled at Young. “It’s not as if you have a choice, is it? She’s the one making the decisions and you’re not doing yourself any favours obsessing about it. Deal with it!”

"Where do  _ you  _ get off telling me that I'm so messed up?"

Rush looked at him coldly.

"The simple difference, Colonel," Rush spat the word out like an insult, "is that I know I'm a mess. I'm in no denial of that fact."

The door opened and Camile walked into the argument, her face concerned, Over Rush's shoulder he could see Eli trying to get her to leave again. She evidently had no idea what it was about. Young could see Brody and Volker's worried faces in the doorway. She looked to Eli, who shrugged helplessly but said nothing.

Rush evidently saw Young's face change and turned to see Camile and Eli. "Shut the door Eli." He snapped.

Eli closed the door, shutting out the others. Camile was looking at Young and Rush, where they stood, with maybe a foot between them, tense and wary."What?" Rush demanded.

"What's going on?" Camile asked.

"We're having a discussion." Young said.

"What about?" Camile didn't look convinced.

"Nothing important." Rush said evenly. "We were just discussing our plans for tomorrow."

Even to Young it sounded evasive.

"It looks more like a stand up argument." Camile said. "Added to the fact the Brody and Volker both say that they walked in on you gripping Doctor Rush by the collar, Colonel and it looks less like a discussion and more like an argument getting seriously out of hand."

Young could see Eli standing behind her and as he caught Eli's eye, Eli threw his hands out with a look that said "I'm sorry I couldn't stop her".

"It's personal." Said Rush.

"Personal." Camile gave them a long look. "I'm sorry, but as your interpersonal history includes one of you trying to kill the other, and one of you trying to frame the other for murder, you'll forgive me it I take that lack of explanation with a pinch of salt."

"It's personal." Rush reiterated. "And I have no intention of discussing my personal issues with you, Camile."

"Colonel Young." She turned to Young and he noted she didn't call him Everett, meaning she was being official. "Would you like to explain what I'm missing to me?"

Young shrugged, shifting his weight against the console.

"Rush is right, it's personal."

Camile looked from one to the other.

"I really don't want to insist, but I can't leave this. We are the command team on this ship, and breakdowns in working relations between the command team place everyone at risk."

Young could see Eli cringing in embarrassment behind Camile.

"Camile," Rush said, "our relationship is none of your concern."

"Actually it is, as I just said."

Rush turned his head to look at Young.

"You're obviously a better liar than I gave you credit for, Young." Rush told him. "She has no idea."

"Camile?" Eli was tugging on her arm, "I think it really is personal."

"Fighting in the leadership team over personal issues?" She turned back to Rush and Young. "Now, I suggest we sort this out reasonably."

"Camile," Young said, trying to mimic her reasonable tone when he felt anything but, "I can assure you there's nothing in the current relationship Rush and I have that is going to lead to any incidents like the two you mentioned."

He saw Camile's eyes flick down to Rush's now bare right hand. 

"Oh for fucks sake." Said Rush.

He turned, grabbed Young by the hips, hauled him in and kissed him, one hand sliding behind Young's waist. Young tensed in surprise, then tentatively brought a hand up to Rush's jaw, sliding his right hand to cup Rush's hip. This was a real kiss, Rush's hands were firm around him, his lips were moving over Young's confidently, plucking at his bottom lip gently, Rush's tongue dipping into his mouth. His hand tensed on Rush's hip and he kissed back softly, the tips of his fingers stroking at Rush's beard.

He vaguely heard Camile say "Oh!"

"I told you it was personal." Eli said, a little fraught.

Rush pulled away, dark eyes staring into his. Young searched his eyes, dropping the hand on his face to his shoulder. Rush pressed his lips together, giving Young one of his frustratingly unreadable long looks, then without stepping away, spun in Young's arms to face Camile.

"Personal." He said flatly, his back against Young's chest. 

Young's heart was thumping in his chest as he watched Camile's reaction over Rush's shoulder. Camile stood there, shocked, and he watched as she deliberately composed herself.

"Way to out yourselves, guys." Muttered Eli.

"Eli!" Rush and Young spoke in tandem.

"You were right about one thing Camile." Rush said. "Secrets between the command team are problematic and dangerous," he paused, "but I do expect you'll maintain our privacy? You of all people understand what this could mean."

Oh you utter bastard, thought Young a little admiringly as he sat back down in his kino chair heavily, play on her sympathies and put her in a place she can't say no.

"I didn't realise either of you were bisexual." Camile said, almost conversationally.

Nice save, impressive.

"We're not, as such." Said Rush. "We just sleep in the same bed sometimes."

"And kiss."

"That too occasionally."

Camile looked at Eli, who was standing, with his tensest 'get me out of here' face on, then back at them.

"Who knows? Apart from Eli of course who keeps all of your secrets."

She shot Eli a look which he ducked his head away from.

"TJ." Said Young. "Possibly Chloe. That's it."

"Impressive," said Camile, "considering I'm guessing it's been a while."

"A few months." Said Rush noncommittally.

"And what do you intend to tell Brody and Volker?"

"Nothing." Rush snapped.

Camile frowned. "I seriously doubt you'll be able to keep it a secret forever."

"We'll cross that bridge when we come to it." Rush said.

Camile looked at Young, who nodded. 

She sighed, then shrugged. "Well, there's nothing I can do about it even if I wanted to. Whether Homeworld Command will have an opinion when it finally comes out is another matter."

"As I said…" Rush replied.

Camile sighed again.

"And your thoughts, Everett?"

Young shrugged. "Eventually, maybe. Not yet." He looked up at Eli. "You'd better tell Brody and Volker that Camile is arbitrating our dispute. Tell them to go work in the Core."

Eli nodded and as he walked to the door Rush took two large steps away from him, before the door opened. Young felt the absence as a momentary sharp sensation as Rush moved out of his arms. Eli walked out closing the door behind him, Young could see Brody and Volker's faces, expectant as Eli came out. The door hissed shut.

"I can't say I'm not surprised." Camile said. "It seems pretty unlikely."

Rush grimaced. "It seemed like a good idea at the time." He said shortly.

She leaned on the console.

"It's not easy." She warned them. "There's people who won't like it. Maybe not on Destiny, though I think it'll take people a while to get used to it, but you'll have to prepare yourself for some bad reactions."

Young laughed. "Not the first time I've disappointed people. I'll worry about it then if we make it home. We're both single, I'm not breaking any code of conduct now am I? Until then, I doubt it's likely to come up off of the ship, is it?" Young said.

She looked at him. "It could be argued it compromises your roles as leaders."

Rush snorted derisively. "It's not as if the Colonel is the type to allow anything to get in the way of what needs to be done for the ship now, is he?"

Camile blinked at him. "No, but maybe Everett Young is? Or Nicholas Rush?"

"Doubtful. We'll both do what needs to be done, same as always." Said Rush categorically.

Camile looked thoughtful. "Well, I guess it's congratulations then." She said. "I'll leave you two to it."

She smiled briefly and left.

Young turned to Rush as the door closed. Rush had turned straight back to his console and was already getting back to work. After a moment he seemed to become aware of Young's scrutiny.

"What." He said, not looking up. "Did you think we shouldn't have told her? She won't mention it."

"No, I agree we needed to tell her, and I'm impressed with your emotional blackmail."

Rush looked at him. "It needed to be done."

He turned back to the console and started working again.

"What are you still staring at?" Rush asked after about a minute.

"Why did you do it like that?"

Rush looked up. "It seemed the best way to prevent her telling anyone."

"No, the kiss."

"I had to kiss you so she'd accept it; she'd never have credited it otherwise."

Young couldn't work out if Rush was being deliberately obtuse. He pushed himself back up and leaned closer to him, then took his jaw and kissed him, moving his lips gently to pull at Rush's bottom lip. He slid his other hand round Rush's waist, drawing him out from behind the console and pulling Rush against him. Slowly Rush reacted, lips parting a little to kiss back, hands sliding round Young's waist. He was startled as Rush tipped his head slightly to get a better angle but this time neither of them pulled away.

Young pulled back first. "Why?" he asked Rush.

"Because I wanted to." 

Young gave Rush a look, but supplied the line anyway. "Just like that?"

"Just like that."

Young licked his lips a little tensely.

"Go away Young," Rush said, "go work, like I need to. I'm sure you can find time to discuss this later."

 

xxxoooxxx

 

He was waiting in Rush's bed when he finally decided to turn in for the night. 

“I’m sorry.” Young said quickly before he could get a word in. “I said is was none of your business and that’s not true.”

Rush stripped off his t-shirts and pants and slid into the bed in his underpants. 

“You’re as…” Young paused. “This is a relationship, a kinda weird one, but you...matter...too.”

“Shut up Young.” Rush muttered, but there was no bitterness in his voice.

Young leaned into him.

“What?” Rush demanded.

Young kissed him. “I’m sorry.”

Rush huffed a little, but caught his eyes. “Apology accepted. Now can we get some sleep?”

Young rolled over and felt Rush spoon around him. He took Rush’s free hand and tucked it into his chest. 

“Of course.” He replied. “G’night.”


End file.
